Arthur opened his mouth to say the question but Merlin quickly interrupted him. He had had an idea. "I'm starting to think I don't know anything about you. I didn't know you had noticed me and Guinevere, or been concerned about me being sad." Arthur looked a bit hurt, did Merlin really think he cared so little for his friend? Merlin explained himself "I know you cared, I just didn't know you cared so much. You have to admit, you rarely show it." At these words the servant playfully pushed the king.
"So what are you saying? You have questions for me?" Arthur asked when he had regained balance.
"I can't think of any right at this moment. But don't be surprised if I interrupt your questioning from time to time and slip in some questions that come to my mind." Merlin looked in Arthur's eyes searching for an agreement.
"Merlin, you really are an idiot! I have asked you so many questions, it is only fair that you ask me questions whenever you want, you don't need my permission." Arthur broke the eye contact laughing. "I'm starting to wonder if you actually think before you speak" the king couldn't resist teasing his friend a little. Merlin couldn't help but join the laughter. He really had spoken without thinking. But his friend was right, Arthur had asked him questions; it was his right to ask the king some too. After laughing for some time they turned more serious.
"There is one thing that I have been wondering for a long time. It is not that important, but it has always bugged me." Arthur thoughtfully said. He hadn't been sure whether he should ask it. The question would make him look a bit mean and he was almost certain he wouldn't like Merlin's answer.
"Don't drag it out, just say it." Merlin urged feeling intrigued. "What could possibly have bugged Arthur?" he thought.
"Fine, here it goes. I have had many servants before you and, while none of them had complained about the workload, they have always struggled to do everything I asked them to." Arthur didn't think it was necessary to mention that a few servants had actually quit and gone to work in the fields saying that even a mule had an easier job.
"Yet you seem to be managing just fine, although I give you more chores than I did to them and you still have to help Gaius. So how exactly are you doing it? Any normal servant would have collapsed a long time ago." Arthur turned to look at his friend.
Merlin let out a loud laugh. "That's what has bugged you? That is one strange thing to fixate on, Arthur. But then again, you probably wonder how anyone does anything, since you just hunt or read some papers all day." Merlin just couldn't resist it; the whole question seemed like Arthur admitting that he does much less than his servant.
Arthur sent a glare his direction. "Just put my wonderings to rest, don't be…" the king struggled to think of an appropriate insult. He settled on using his usual expression "a clotpole."
Merlin rolled his eyes, he instantly recognised Arthur's go-to phrase. The king must really want to know the answer if he hadn't thought of a more creative insult. "Fine. It is simple, really. Through the years I have got to know you pretty well. So I know which tasks I should do and which ones you just make up to prove a point. Sure, at the beginning I did everything and it felt like I had no time for a personal life. Actually, I didn't have a personal life. Not sure if I do now." Merlin went on, becoming more and more thoughtful. Then he noticed Arthurs confused look and snapped out of it.
"But that's for another reason. I'll leave it for another question." Smiling weekly he quickly returned to the question at hand.
"So I completely ignore the chores you give me to prove a point. As for the other chores, you could say I do some of them half way. How many times do you think I actually polished your armour?" Merlin asked, turning to Arthur.
"I hope every time I asked. My armour is protects me and my reputation. To respect the king people have to see him dressed appropriately. The reflection of sun on my chest makes me seem important. And I like it when it shines, I can blind people by sending sun into their eyes." Arthur said and clasped hands over his mouth. He hadn't wanted to tell that last part. Great, now Merlin will have even more things to tease him about. He internally groaned.
Merlin laughed at the king admitting to still acting like a kid and tucked the information in his memory. It would definitely come useful the next time Arthur will act more pratty than usual.
"Oh, you know so little. Arthur, I would have to follow you with the armour in my hand, polishing it while accompanying you to feasts and hunts, if I polished it every time you asked. I just check if it looks even a bit shiny and give it to you. If it's not shiny I pour some oil on it. I mean, you have to know how to cut corners, otherwise I would become mad. This way everyone is happy – you get sun on your chest and in people's eyes, I stay sane. I see no downsides." Merlin smiled.
Seeing Arthur frown he quickly added "Of course, I do the important things that could save your life. I sharpen your sword, check for dents on the armour, feed the horses. And if I find that I can't manage, there is always" Merlin stopped himself. He had almost said "magic". He had to be more careful.
"What is there always?" Arthur asked, shattering the silence that had fallen when Merlin had suddenly stopped mid-sentence. For a reason he could not explain he was waiting anxiously for the continuation. He even leaned to Merlin's direction in anticipation. The air seemed to buzz around them; it was like the whole cave was buzzing with excitement.
Merlin didn't notice any of this as he frantically searched his mind to find another ending to the sentence, so that it would still be true. "Other servants! There is always other servants." Merlin knew the grammar wasn't actually right but he hoped Arthur would not notice. Arthur leaned back and the cave turned back to normal. The excitement disappeared as quickly as it had appeared and Arthur actually felt disappointed, though he could not tell why.
Meanwhile Merlin desperately tried to take Arthur's attention away from the inconsistent grammar. So he continued rambling "And Gaius, remember, when Gaius helped you dress? And there was also the time Gwen brought you food. And – and – and – the servant who joked about brass! Don't remember his name, was it George? I wonder what happened to him. I haven't seen him in a while, not after he showed me how to polish correctly and I told him his brass jokes don't seem funny to me. Or maybe it was Greg?"
Arthur looked at his servant with suspicion. The only times when Merlin rambled this frantically was when he was hiding something. Deciding he had plenty of time to find out what was the secret, Arthur decided to let it go for now.
"The servant's name was George." Even though they both knew that wasn't important Arthur felt the need to give respect to the most efficient servant in Camelot.
Looking at the worst servant in Camelot he continued "So I have found out that you are lazy and have many friends in the castle. Let's move on?" Even though it sounded like a question, Arthurs eyes made it an order. And Merlin was only happy to follow it.