Well what is this? An update :O summer holidays are finally here, and I am going to be rather busy. I thought this would be a relaxing holiday, but the higher powers…aka parents…have other ideas. So I am going to try and update quickly, but if you don't hear from me for a while, I haven't abandoned you or anything.

PHYSCO. Kung-Fu-Dancerr: Thank you hope you like this chapter.

ekatia217: Here is the next awaited chapter, hope you like it

asianimposter: Thank you my love here is another chapter for you to enjoy, hope you like it

Kariah Bengalii: I had a feeling you wouldn't be expecting that, I decided I would like to keep everyone on their toes and surprise them :P Anyway I hope you like this chapter

Disclaimer: I don't and will never own the world that is Harry Potter. I don't anything, except for the plot

Chapter Six: New Beginnings

I slowly walked back to the common room without even thinking. It was as if my legs were moving at their own accord. In what felt like no time at all, I had finally arrived at the portrait of the Fat Lady. I told the Fat Lady the password and walked inside. I walked straight through the common room, which was still busy considering how late it was. But then I remembered it was Saturday, no school tomorrow. I kept walking making my way towards the stairs.

"Hermione! Hermione wait up!" A voice called out to me above all of the noise. But I didn't want to talk to anyone right now, I needed time for myself. Time to think. I walked into my dorm and quickly changed into my pyjamas. I flopped onto my bed and buried myself under my duvet. I started to shake as I tried to hold back my tears, but it didn't work so instead I quietly cried myself to sleep.

HGDMHGDMHGDM

I woke up at midday on Sunday, and all the girls in my dorm had already left to do whatever it is they have planned. I didn't bother getting out of bed. In my mind, I just couldn't see the point. I couldn't see the point in doing anything. Then I started to remember, all of the memories. Our annual trips to France, our skiing holiday trips, first learning to ride a bike and when they first found out I was a witch. But none of that matters anymore. In a split second everything had changed. If I had never become a witch, they would still be alive. If I had gone to Beauxbatons instead of Hogwarts they would still be alive. If I hadn't become friends with Harry and Ron, maybe they would still be alive, if Merope Gaunt hadn't created that love potion to get Tom Riddle. Little things like that can cause major consequences. I thought we had won the war, but now it feels as if we had truly lost. Not only did I loose my parents but so did Teddy, Harry and even Neville. But it's slightly different for Teddy as he is very young. I'm not trying to dismiss the fact that he has tragically lost their parents, but they didn't have the chance to create all of the memories I had over the past eighteen years. Harry has lost so much in the war as well. Not only has he lost his parents but his surrogate parents, Lupin, Sirius and Dumbledore. Somehow he has the strength to carry on, and I have to admire him for that. Things will never be the same I guess, I know that for sure. I felt like crying, but there were no more tears left, I was to tired to cry. It hurts to cry. Instead I closed my eyes.

HGDMHGDMHGDM

Monday morning. Lessons today. How I didn't want to go, which is a strange thing for me to say. I forced myself to get up and have a shower. I checked the clock when I came out and saw that I had ten minutes before D.A.D.A. So once I was dressed I headed directly to the classroom. By the time I arrived, my class was already filing in. I joined the back of the line and made my way to the front of the class where my desk as. I took my books out of my bed, rested them on the table and rested my head on top of them.

"Okay class, today we are going to be duelling each other today. So if you would like to stand up please and move your desks to the sides please," Professor Miranda said. We all stood up and levitated our desks and chairs to the side. "Alright Mr Malfoy and Mr Weasley, you're up first." Ron and Malfoy walked into the center of the classroom. Simultaneously they both waved their wands at each other.

"Stupefy!" They both shouted. Red light emitted from their wands and they both ducked just in time to miss being hit by the opponents spell. Minutes later, Malfoy managed to defeat Ron. Poor Ron.

"Miss Granger and Miss Parkinson, you're up next." I walked into the center of the room, and waited for Parkinson. All the anger, fear and loneliness slowly built up inside me. As soon as Parkinson raised her wand, I had already sent a silent stunning spell at her. It was so powerful, that as it hit her straight on in the chest, she flew backwards into the opposite wall. I honestly had no sympathy for her. I took a couple of deep breaths to calm myself. I turned on my heel and stood with the rest of the group.

"Are you alright 'Mione?" Ginny asked quietly as I stood next to her.

"Why?" I asked her, staring straight ahead not bothering to look at her.

"You don't seem yourself, that's all. WE are worried about you that's all. We want to help you, protect you," she said softly. Her saying that made me angry, because I knew that wasn't true.

"Well a fat lot of good that has done then, eh?" I whispered angrily, glaring at her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She asked.

"If you don't know now, then there is no point explaining it to you. So go back to Harry, Ron and Lavender, and leave me ALONE!" I all but shouted at her not caring that we were in a lesson, and for me to say that is strange.

"Miss Granger, Miss Weasley can you quiet down please." Prof. Miranda scolded. I felt my heart racing, I couldn't deal with being in lesson…being around people. It was all too much. So without thinking, I grabbed my bag and ran out of the lesson, and went to the only place I could think of. And that would be the library.

As I walked in, I could smell that library smell, such a familiar smell of old books and parchment and it helped to calm me down. I walked over to my usual table at the back and sat down. What to do? I need to do something to keep me distracted. I need to learn something new. But what? What don't I know already, which could be useful to me? I thought about it for minutes and suddenly and idea came to me.

"Wandless magic," I mumbled to myself. It was a perfect idea. I pulled out my wand and summoned the correct tome to me, with all the information I would need. I opened the book to the first page and started to read.

HGDMHGDMHGDM

Evening had come and I just finished reading up about the theory of wandless magic, and I now understand it. I didn't bother with breakfast, lunch or dinner today. I wasn't hungry, or rather I just couldn't muster eating. However what I did learn today was, that in order to excel at wandless magic, is you need to feel your energy and your magic source from within. You have to live and breathe your magic. It is not all about the incantation and waving your wand around, it's about becoming one with your magic. You have to understand it. I know that sounds rather silly, but it is true, and I am determined to master it. I closed the book and closed my eyes, and attempted to feel my magic. Its quite hard to explain, but it was like I was searching for my core, feeling around until I felt this slither of constant energy flowing around me. That's magic. I stayed focused with my eyes closed, and sat there for hours just getting used to tapping into my magical core, until it became second nature to me and I could find it in an instant. Eventually I opened my eyes and saw that it was eleven o'clock. It is really late; I should really be making my way back to the common room. I'm surprised Madam Pince didn't tell me to leave already. I quickly put the tome away and ran towards the Gryffindor Tower.

"What the hell was that in D.A.D.A. Hermione?" Ron started on me immediately as I walked into the common room. I couldn't be bothered to deal with this right now.

"Exactly, I was only asking what was wrong." Ginny continued.

"And then you disappear for the whole day." Harry added.

"Missed all your lessons, that is so unlike you," Ginny finished.

"What's going on Hermione?" Harry asked quietly. I didn't need this right now, why couldn't they just understand that. I tried to push past them, but they weren't having any of that.

"Look, I don't need this right now," I said quietly.

"No we are doing this right now. We are your best friends for Merlin's sake!" Ron shouted. And that is what made me mad.

"AND?" I screamed, "That doesn't mean anything anymore. You guys don't know anything!"

"What does that even mean?" Ginny asked, her voice sounding aggravated.

"You don't know anything that has happened. As long as it doesn't affect your little couple then it doesn't matter." And once I started I couldn't stop. All the feelings inside me were starting to spill out. "You guys pushed me out, and you never even realised. Half the time it feels like I'm invisible. And I am only there when you need help. You never noticed how alone I felt, how alone I feel. You guys are meant to be my best friends! You are meant to be there for me! But you haven't been!" I screamed pushing past them, thanking that the common room was practically empty.

"Hermione wait! We haven't finished," Ginny called out from behind me. Well I have, so I didn't bother to turn around.

Nightmares came again tonight, this time with a vengeance.

*I was struggling to breath; the crazed Death Eater, Bellatrix Lestrange was straddling me, crushing me.

"The sword is meant to be in my vault in Gringotts, how did you get it?" Bellatrix whispered into my face, her spit flying everywhere. "Did you and your friends take it from my vault?" she screamed with anger.

"I didn't take anything," I cried out to her, but that wasn't the answer she wanted to hear.

"Right," she said, and that is when she pulled out her wand and started to engrave something into my left arm. The pain was excruciating and I couldn't help but scream. This pain seemed to last a life time and I realised it was over. Well I thought it was over, until she smiled a deranged smile at me. A smile filled with evil and glee, and then she muttered the word most wizards dread…

"Crucio," she muttered. And I was struck with a pain. A pain so unbearable it has pushed some wizards to the brink of insanity.*

*I was standing behind my parents. I had just finished packing for my mission with Harry and Ron to find and kill the Horcruxes. My parents were sitting down in the living room watching the television, not noticing that I was behind them. A lone tear fell down my cheek as I slowly raised my wand at them, and uttered that one spell.

"Obliviate." And all the memories of me slowly disappeared. All the pictures of me slowly erased themselves as if I never existed. That is how it had to be at a time like this. It was the only way to keep them safe, and that is hard to live with.*

*"Well, where are they? Are they alright? Are they on there way here?" I asked her, just wanting her to spit it out already. I should just let her continue speaking without the constant interruptions.

"I'm sorry Miss Granger. But they are dead." She finally said. The smile on my face fell.*

* I took another breath as I slowly fell forwards, waiting for the feeling of falling through the air, when something grabbed onto my jumper pulling me back. I don't know who, what or why they were pulling me back, but all I could do was fight back.

"LET GO OF ME!" I screamed, fighting and struggling to get away. I need to be with my parents. Why was I being stopped?*

"Miss Granger, wake up." A voice said loudly. My eyes suddenly shot open. My breathing heavy, it sounded like I was panting. I tried and I tried to control my breathing all the while looking around at my surrounding. I was defiantly not in the Gryffindor Tower anymore.

"Why am I in the infirmary? I asked confusedly, noticing my friends were all around me.

"You were having a bad nightmare and we couldn't wake you up, so we immediately brought you down here." Ginny answered from where she was standing by my bed.

"I know you are going through a hard time right now Miss Granger, but you can't do this all alone. You need your friends at a time like this." Madam Pomfrey said softly as she handed me a potion. I quickly sniffed it and it smelt strongly of a dreamless potion.

"Hold on, through a time like what?" Ron asked confusedly.

"Don't they know?" The matron asked shocked. Everyone in the school knows that we are best friends. But no one knows what really goes on behind our public façade. I shook my head at her question. "You have to tell them Miss Granger," I nodded. "Drink that before you go to sleep. I'll leave you to it." She excused herself and went back to her office. And I was grateful for that.

"What's the time?" I asked looking at the bed sheets, only so I could avoid their piercing gaze.

"A little after two," Harry answered. "What's going on Hermione? And don't say nothing." Harry demanded. I shook my head slowly and started to cry. Ginny sat down on my bed and stroked my back in a soothing manner.

"Surely it can't be that bad Hermione," Ron said warily. He always felt awkward around crying people. He never knows what to do.

"But it is that bad Ronald. It doesn't get much worse." I cried through the tears.

"What is it then?" He asked frustrated.

"my parents are dead," I whispered. I looked up at him, "My parents are DEAD!" I screamed at him, crying harder than before. Ginny pulled me into a hug. "They are dead…gone…they are never coming back," I cried.

"Oh Hermione, why didn't you tell us?" Ginny asked softly.

"Because you guys were to busy with each other to notice that I needed you." I cried.

"no matter what Hermione, we are your best friends, you can tell us anything." Harry explained holding onto my hand. The thing is, they say that now…but how true, and how long is that statement going to last? Because I honestly, I am not too sure. But they are here right now, and that is all that matters. Isn't it?

Well there we go…is it a new beginning between the new best friends. Is this going to bring their relationship closer? Who knows…well I do, but keep reading to find out. Some Draco/Hermione interaction coming in next chapter, so stay tuned.

Review ;) noooo pressure.