A/N: O.M.F.G! I feel so ashamed for forgetting about you guys! bad bad writer... o.0"
i've been completey up in switching schools - I'm going to stop with high school and start with a study to become an veterinairy assistant! lookign forward to it!

but so...I'm bakc in the game again! and here are Melody and Edward backt too! I hope my grammar isn't toooo bad. but if it is - please let me know!

An hour or two later, having killed two blackboards in my mind with my death glare, it was time for lunch. I'd expected and waited for it that my mind would get on ease and the tension in my muscles would relax. However, it went exactly the other way around.
I felt like I wasn't allowed to be myself and that was really going in the wrong direction. And maybe it had to do something with Edward's time era – maybe men from that time were a bit more dominant.
But then again – Carlisle was much older and he let Esmé live and act how she wanted too. so this whole thing was all Edward and his behavior.
I left the classroom, following the bunch of completely other students out of the building. Mike, Eric, Jessica, Lauren and all those other graduated last year, so Bella and I paired up most of the time.
I slung my bag over my shoulder, pulling out my phone to text Bella out of boredom and to get a seat somewhere far away from the Cullens. I didn't feel like socializing today.
I rounded the corner, setting up a text when I bumped into something hard. I stumbled backwards a little, steadying myself just in time. I prayed it were the lockers, but I didn't think I was that squint.
I looked up, half expecting Alice or Rose, but when I reached the face of my obstacle, I felt tiny stings of fear.

It was that guy who tried to make me his fiancée.
His eyes were set harshly in his skull, arms crossed over his chest and hair wild as every day. His honey colored eyes seemed to darken when mine's crossed them.
"We are going to talk. Now." he growled at a low volume so no one else could hear the threatening edge. It was the voice he used when we faced the enemy, or when we fought James, when he spoke to Aro in Italy.
But I was not the enemy – I was his girlfriend.
I huffed, rolling my eyes even though it stung me how things were going. We'd promised each other to get back to normal again last night. But somehow getting back wasn't possible. Like people said – the past has passed.
"Fine. Whatever."

After I'd uttered the murmured words, Edward abruptly turned around and started to walk away from me. I followed him, clutching my bag against my chest and noticed we were heading outside, where it was still drizzling.
He went to a spot beneath a roof just outside the cafeteria. I faintly saw the other Cullens inside sitting at the table, pretending not to know what was happening outside.
Edward faced me again, his hands shove din the pockets of his jeans, his posture obstinate. I stopped in front of him, waiting expectantly for what he wanted to say.
"Why did you do that earlier?" he began, his voice breaking at the end, which astonished me a bit. I truly expected some harsh wrath about whatever he wanted to discuss but instead of fury, he seemed enormously hurt in some way.
I was confused though about what he meant, "What did I do?"
Edward's brows furrowed as he looked down to face the ground beneath us.
"Why did you change your eye color like that? You know I can't deal with that and yet you do it. Why? Just because you're aggressive or angry?" he nearly spat.

"Wait a minute…" I started, pointing my index finger at his chest, "you blame me for something I have no control about and then you are accusing ME for being aggressive!?" I ground out maybe more forcefully than I intended in the first place.
Edward grimaced and looked away again, over the parking lot.
"If there is someone here to blame for aggressiveness, than it's you. When there is only just a slight thing wrong, you yell at me. When I'm not following your absurd orders, you yell at me!" I said, calmly, but struggling to keep my voice even.
He looked back at me, his eyes liquidly gold, glimmering with frustration, pain and pity. I was near tears at that. He didn't allow me to be myself. How ridiculous could it be to get angry at your girlfriend and the mother of your children just because her inhuman eyes change color?

"Hell, even when I'm myself you yell at me…"
A traitorous tear spilled and all I wanted in that moment was a safe haven to run too when I felt bad. In the past it had been Edward, my best friend. When he was gone, my siblings were his replacement. Now I just wanted two toddlers to just hold me and let me relax as they napped against my side or let their head lay on my shoulder.
"I..I'm sorry." Edward murmured as I sensed him taking a few steps closer. I was still looking at the rain which had become heavier again.
"And…It's just…Melody I need more time to adjust. I told you last night and yes, I promise to behave more like a boyfriend should. And how your eyes suddenly sparked with that color…it scared me. you don't know how much it scares me to see it." he admitted ruefully. A pang tugged at me heart. I was scaring him, disgusting him.

"Haven't you thought about it, that I'm still human and still have that little extra? Ever wondered about it that it's not my fault that I'm like this at all?" I replied, crying all over now, needing him, his arms, his shoulder to cry on. to save me, like he always does.
"And I love you, baby. More than anything else and that's why it scares me to see you become more different every time." he informed me, taking my hand in his. The hand that was still as warm as every humans. But I knew it could be only tomorrow that the same skin would be lukewarm or even cold. Edward's fingers brushed away the tears. "I don't like hurting you, I don't want it. but I always end up doing just that. And that scares me too. How long are you going to accept it, take it without leaving?"
I swallowed thickly, looking up at him with watering eyes, seeing the reflection of his burning soul.

"I know Edward. I do. But for as much as you think you're protecting me for whatever it might be – I don't deserve to be oppressed like that. You can tell me things, but don't restrict me in being me and doing what is good for me. That's what bothers me the most."
I saw his eyes widen for a moment but at the same time his hand left mine as if he had been stung. But I was sure as hell that my hands weren't filled with voltage. I'd easily floor him if that was true.
I stepped away from him, hurt mostly and confused. You might think I was pregnant again with all those mood shifts and such, but that wasn't possible – Edward did not let me near him like that again.
We were silent for a long time just staring off into space, hearing the rain pour down on the metal roof above us. Thinking was bad for mind lately. When I noticed Edward move, in order to leave I looked up. he was slinging his bag over his shoulder effortlessly and handing me mine.

"I…I guess I'll see you tonight." He informed me in a passive tone, eyes blank before turning around and heading to his Volvo. I supposed he wasn't bothering to follow any classes for the remainder of today.

I wandered back to the main building, hearing the faint purr of Edward's Volvo get distant with ease meter he drove. I was near tears again, but stopped them just in time.
I realized I needed to text Bella after all, if I could drive home with her today instead.

Edward POV

Walking away and leaving her like that made me feel like the largest asshole existing. She didn't deserve it that I was acting like this, but it was for her own good. The only way to save her life. And what a cruel way to go.

I needed to lie to her, to pretend that I was mentally shaken up and afraid for finding out what she was. that was partially true – really knowing it did fear me but not in the way I let her think. I feared for her. For what was about to come when I knew, when everyone knew. And with everyone I also meant those old vampires with black capes in Italy.
I slowly went to the Volvo, hearing Melody's heartbeat behind me like a lifeline. I was so focused on it lately, that I found out there was a different pace in the beat. It seemed somewhat faster and fluttering. Just another part of her being not human.

I sighed deeply, feeling the spark of remorse and hatred towards myself start to hum through me. I only seemed to brood like I used to before I met my mate the last few months. I wanted to have fun with her, play with my sons bake cookies for all I cared. I wanted to cuddle up with her, have her sleeping in my bed every night and kiss her senseless. Hell, my body wished to make love to her every day, but that went out of my limits.
I was already driving away from the school building and on my way home, seeing that was the best place to go, thinking about pros and cons.

The Last time Melody and I got there, to the complete lovers state, was the first time too. it had been amazing to me almost everything but in the mean time I hated myself for letting her cheat. But it was only three months later that I found out Jacob Black never had been her boyfriend.
And still, I refused to go that far again – I knew I'd hurt her badly, scarred her mind and memories and doing that again made my dead heart constrict with pain. I was also convinced though, that she wouldn't want me to touch her in that way again – the memories of that night were like a bittersweet nightmare to me and probably to her too.
Not very much later I turned into the gravel path towards my house. I smiled remembering Melody telling me that it had been hers over ten years ago. She explained how it had looked back then and how her baby room, my bedroom now, was decorated.

I got out of the car in front of the house letting out a gush of air again. I truly, deeply and irrevocably loved her, my lady, my girlfriend. I just had to think of a plan to act like myself and be the man she loves and protecting her by acting like a moron. That made me aggressive, the frustration, the fear of the unknown. And I knew she hated that, but I was sure she could see that I was aware of her fast changing moods – she was in the midst of her changing process. But in what she was exactly changing I didn't know.

All I knew was that she was thus dangerous, that Aro feared her and wanted her end no matter what the costs might be. And I needed to make sure that this wouldn't happen even if it would shatter our relationship. My Melody, Raven and Blaze needed to be safe, no matter what.

Entering the living room and having shrugged of my leather jacket, I saw Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and even Alice giving me the dead-eye. I growled at them and rolled my eyes.

"Sure, do that Edward. Pretend as if this is normal." Rose barked after me when I wanted to go up to my room. I clenched my fists immediately against the frustration I was feeling.
"It's true Bro, not cool how you're behaving towards your lady." I heard Emmett say after that. I growled again and turned around to burst back into the living room.
"Take care of your own damn business!" I roared, emphasizing my anger with my hands.
"Fine Edward, but the way you react is not fair! You're way too aggressive for your girlfriend! Maybe you should consider that you are not right for her after all!" Jasper raged back, very protective of Melody after he'd almost wanted to kill her last year. The fact that they were interfering in this made me livid and seeing red with rage. My relationship with Melody was not something they should meddle in!
"Already doubting Edward?" Jasper said again, spurring on my anger and it was then that I was so enraged, that I lunged for him.

I jumped up with a roar, pushing him to the ground and letting my fist hit the side of his head before he jumped away. I expected him to lunge for me then, but the hits never came.
Jasper just stood there, surrounded by my siblings who were staring with the mouths agape.
"Look what has become of you." Jasper said calmly, his mind set in what was recognized as a friendly, brotherly manner. As if he tried to help me.
Despite the fact that I never needed the oxygen, I was breathing harshly through my barely existent lungs. I frowned, realizing I was getting mad.
"I…I don't know what came over me…" I whispered, feeling a tremor of fear course over my spine. I never feared anything more than to hurt my loved ones.
And that was exactly what I had been doing for a really long time.
"which is dangerous for Melody, Raven and Blaze. You can't lose control like that caused by whatever is going on between the two of you." Alice remarked her voice sharp, something I did not hear often form the pix.
I hung my head and left right then, wanting to think for myself.

I was losing control, my sanity and not because of blood. No something bigger. Fear, anxiety, love…
What I did to Jasper was incredulous – not me. It made me feel extremely afraid that I might hurt my sons or my mate even if it was just per accident.
I needed to stop the mystery, the secrets we kept from each other without knowing we did. but on the other hand I needed to protect her from the highest danger that was about to come, searching for her.
And somewhere in my mind I wanted to know what she was, where she was capable off. Why the Volturi would want her as if she was the most atrocious crime that had ever took place.
But my Melody never, ever did anything wrong in their presence.

My eyes snapped open, seeing the water that was flowing down from the rock I was standing on gush heavily. I realized I knew nothing of her past. Not even a simple flinch…
I could say she never committed a crime that entailed vampires and the Volturi…

Or did she?