Part VI

Disclaimer: Anything you recognize belongs to Disney.

"You know how sometimes you tell yourself that you have a choice, but really you don't have a choice? Just because there are alternatives doesn't mean they apply to you."

― Rick Yancey, The 5th Wave

If her life were a slippery slope, Judy thought to herself as she stood in front of Koslov's manor for the first time, she was surely slipping.

She steeled her resolve anyway and carefully observed the compound one last time before she walked up to the two polar bears guarding the main entrance. "J. Hopps here to see Gospodin Koslov. Zoya should have called ahead to let him know I was coming," she stated calmly.

She heard a low grumble that she easily was able to identify as a type of laughter after years in Zoya's company, and she scowled, "Is something funny gentlemen?"

"You are J? You must be joking small one," the one that laughed said.

She rapidly tapped her foot against the ground in false irritation. "Look Raymond, Kevin, I get it, I'm a 'tiny little bunny,'" she drawled imitating their accents and making air quotes with her fingers. "But if you don't hurry up and let me in I'm going in anyway, and I don't think your boss would be too thrilled with you if I did."

One of them growled and she sighed in a show of annoyance, "Okay, I didn't come here to waste my time being laughed at by two overgrown chunks of muscle, so either get over your rather considerably sized selves and let me in, or I'll let myself in."

And that did it. The one that had been growling lunged at her and was quickly followed by the other. With a nimbleness that came from genetics combined with years of exercise she jumped up over the first one's lunging maw and landed on his back before she scampered across him and leapt to the other. With a steady paw she snagged the key out of his pocket, knowing where it was located from days of observation, before she used him as a springboard and jumped to the door-knob. She quickly shoved the key in the lock before they were able to recover and turned it. As they both stood and made their way towards her she pulled out the key and tossed it over their heads.

While the somewhat dim bears turned and scrambled for it before it was lost in the snow, she winked and shot them a peace sign, "Thanks for the help gentlemen." She then jumped on the push-down tab above the door handle and heard a click. In her last few moments she hopped down to the ground and shoved the door open before scampering into the mansion to get lost in the shadows. She took a moment as the two bowled in after her, in order to calm her breathing to make sure her collar wasn't about to go off and give away her position. The bears crashed past her in the direction she assumed she needed to be heading in, so she pranced after them at a much slower pace shaking her head as she went.

As she closed in on her destination she heard panicked shouting and roars, before a much larger booming voice yelled, "SILENCE!"

She winced. Koslov had to be giant, she realized.

"Now. If you two would stop babbling like panicked geese, what is going on?" Koslov rumbled threateningly.

"It was a bunny, Boss! She snuck past us and we have no idea where she went!" one of them belted out.

"A bunny? You do not mean the one I am to be meeting with do you Kevin?" Koslov gowled.

Judy could hear one of the other bears swallow through the slightly ajar door as Koslov continued, "You two are meant to be professionals, yes? And yet you chase off my guests, make them break in, and then act like buffoons trying to find them. Do I need to add that you let a rabbit of all things get past your guard? If I didn't already know her reputation, your families would be drawing your life insurance by the end of the day."

"We're sorry boss, we didn't know -" the third bear, Raymond, Judy assumed, though Koslov cut him off.

"I do not need excuses, I need you to find her. Now go!" the large bear roared.

Judy knocked on the door as soon as the noise had tapered off, before poking her head in. "I believe you were looking for me?" she asked, her expression nearly cherubic.

"Ah, yes," the massive bear recovered himself quickly at her appearance. "Good that you were able to get in Miss Hopps," he glared sharply at the other two bears, "I apologize for Kevin and Raymond. They can be a bit, eh, enthusiastic, shall we say?"

"Oh it was no trouble, Gospodin. If anything I enjoyed the challenge, though I wasn't really dressed for it," she said as she stepped into the room, smoothing down her second-hand dress.

"Mmm," he considered her for a moment before turning to his bodyguards, "Gentlemen, this is J. You would do well to remember to leave her alone. She is a feisty one I am told."

She waved at the other two bears, and they watched her warily, "Don't worry about me. So long as we have our little misunderstanding out of the way," she slitted her eyes and gave them a brief icy glare before immediately beaming again, "Then everything should be just fine!"

Koslov chuckled, "You are just like my Zoya said, though I have to wonder what you are here for. You do not seem the sort to go to others for things."

Judy laughed dryly, "Oh no. I may enjoy a certain level of control myself, but I'm not stupid. Prison is one thing, and what you have is certainly not constrained within institutionalized detainment." She met Koslov's eyes, "To be completely frank I've found it entirely impossible to get a job with my criminal history, and I am at the end of my funds." After the statement, she flicked her eyes down and away, having no intention for the mafioso to see her as a threat to him.

"Oh? I assume you do not wish for a loan. You do not seem the sort," he shook his head. "Perhaps you wish for false documentation? It would be difficult with your collar," he gestured towards her scarf clad neck.

"Oh no. I was thinking of something else," she steeled herself. After this there was no going back. The mafia was not good to dabble with lightly, and she was preparing to take a full plunge. "Gospodin," she placed her paw over her chest and bowed at the waist, "I would like to offer any skills that I have to your disposal in exchange for remaining within your care."

Her ears twitched slightly. She instinctively knew that his eyes were bearing into her skull, but she was oddly calm now that her decision had been made.

An eternity seemed to pass, then he dismissed his bodyguards from his room.

Once they were gone he settled back into his chair and inspected his claws, "Stand up child."

She straightened and met his eyes calmly as she waited for his verdict. This time she would not look away. She needed him to see her resolve.

After a moment of quiet he spoke again, "You were good to Zoya even when you could have dragged her name through the mud and ruined her." He looked her over and nodded, "Yes, you are predator. I can see it in your every move. Smell it even. But you are not heartless, no matter how you may act. We are a mafia child, do not take the term lightly."

Judy opened her mouth to speak, but he held up his paw, "I am not saying that you may not join us, simply that you must guard yourself. It was that heart that has saved you here, and I do not want to see it corrupted. My mafia is cruel, yes, but we are fair up to a point. This is my sem'ya, my family, and we watch over each other. All others? If they follow the rules then we get along. If they do not?" The bear's massive shoulders lifted in a shrug, "Then they will rot."

=-.-=

As Judy rode back to Happy Town in one of Koslov's limousines to pick up what few belongings she had, what was left of her heart - the part of her where she held Gideon - wondered what she was getting herself into. The rest of her smiled hollowly.

Slip sliding away

"He was the last thread suspending me in the light. Without him, I can feel myself spiraling downward, falling to a place where I can no longer pull myself back up."

― Marie Lu, The Young Elites

The first time Judy tortured a mammal she felt something dying inside of her, even as she threw up into the bushes when she was done.

She had been working for Koslov for eight months.

"Alright there lass?" a passing otter asked, his eyes watching her with worry behind his poorly repaired glasses.

"Ah yeah," she choked out and wiped her face shakily. In that moment she was thankful for the low light of dusk, and her dark unassuming clothes, "Must've been something I ate I guess."

"Maybe you should get to a vet?" he asked worried.

Judy laughed bitterly, "Oh, I doubt they'd want to see me." She carefully pulled her scarf away from the charge-box on her collar, revealing the innocently blinking yellow light. When she saw understanding dawn on his face, she quickly covered it again, "Thank you for your concern though."

"Oh dear. Well I certainly hope you get to feeling better," he smiled shakily and stepped away from her before darting off into the night.

Judy snorted in amusement despite her nausea. Even born predators were wary around preydators, now that there were more of them out and about. Since they were all convicted of violent crimes, it was easy to understand why.

Despite this, most of the time born predators could at least be counted on not to report 'preyds' that were going incognito. Born preds easily understood the desire to be treated normally, and couldn't really hold it against them - especially when it was even harder for classified predators to get a job than it was for born ones.

Judy scrubbed at her face with her paws in frustration, then slapped her cheeks and shook her head to clear it. She didn't have time for weakness, she had work to do.

With a measured calm she pulled a cell phone out of her pocket and dialed the first number on her speed-dial.

The phone rang twice before it connected abruptly. "Tell me you have something J," a deep voice thundered across the line, desperation mixed into the usually intimidating tones of her boss.

She breathed in deeply and steeled herself before she spoke, her voice coming out cold, "I got a location out of him, though he was being incredibly stubborn. I doubt this line is secure, would you prefer to meet up?"

The polar bear growled in agitation, but Judy didn't hold it against him. "They have my boy J. There is no time to meet, just tell me already. We will meet you there," he snapped.

Judy nodded and she told him.

=-.-=

The rest of that day was adrenaline and bullets, until it was finally elation, when Morris was rescued.

There was no time for regrets or fear. No time to think.

Oddly, despite the possibility of dying at any moment, Judy hadn't felt that alive in years.

Adrenaline sang through her veins, its song an addiction.

"Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on." ―Tim, Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Most days Judy didn't feel much of anything.

She drifted through her life doing jobs for Koslov. On an average day she advised him, coordinated his schedule, and occasionally took care of Morris in his absence (after he was kidnapped his father became even more protective, and Judy didn't mind taking care of the boy).

He was one of the few things that made her feel anything pleasant.

Then came her occasional more exotic jobs.

"J, I just wanted to thank you for helping me find my boy. I will forever be in your debt," the polar bear stated, his expression sincere. "If you hadn't interrogated that piece of musor, that trash..." he trailed off and shook his head. "But that is not the only reason I called you here," he continued, his expression grim.

Judy shifted from foot to foot, adjusting her scarf habitually. This time, the action caused the smell of sweat and gunpowder to drift to her nose, "I'm just glad I was able to get the information in time Sir."

"Yes," he replied and his eyes seemed to pierce into her dying soul. "What you did J, while I am grateful for the results, I think perhaps that you should not have done it. You have changed. It is in your scent."

Judy flinched slightly, and her eyes darted away from his for a moment before her expression hardened and she returned her gaze to his. "Will all due respect Gospodin, whatever the cost to myself, it was worth it," she stated firmly. "This is my family now, and I will not lose anyone else if I can help it, no matter what it takes from me."

"Whatever it takes?" he asked seriously.

Judy nodded in confirmation, "Whatever it takes."

As a rabbit she had more freedom of movement than many of the mafia members, so she was often tasked in verifying the authenticity of any threats against Koslov's "Family." In cases where threats were verified, and subtlety was required to deal with them, she became the go-to solution if the presence of a born predator would have drawn attention.

The poisoner, the bait, the knife in the back, the unexpected assailant that easily blended into the masses of herbivores

The torture specialist

After her first foray into the land of causing pain to attain information, Judy realized (with no small amount of self disgust), that she was rather unfortunately adept at the practice.

More worrying was the sense of control it started to give her in a life that had been so far out of her control for so long.

Some days, if the one she was torturing was terrible enough a mammal, she enjoyed it.

Falling apart bit by bit, only to be put back together in a new shape

She ended up building a reputation in whispers: an unknown but vicious preyd with no morals; little more than a shadow.

Some days she wondered how far off the mark the rumours would be after a few more years of doing what she did.

=-.-=

"It's part of what we call the Shadow, all the dark parts of us we can't face. It's the thing that, if we don't deal with it, eventually poisons our lives." ― Michael Gruber, The Good Son

AN: Any mistranslations can be fully blamed on my dependence on using a translator

Gospodin = Mister in this case; it can also mean lord, master, gentleman, sir, and monsieur