Hello again my good readers. I know it's been a long time since my last chapter, but I think there is no need for me to apologize; because I know that you know how this bloody life works : ( sometimes it pains me to say this but nobody told us this is going to be an easy life so that means, we should shut our mouths and just : ) (just smile don't think too much about it)
so, about the story? oh yes I must have forgotten that... this chapter is a lot different from the other chapters. you'll find out what that means in the end of the chapter. I thought that you are ready to find out about some of their secrets in this chapter. I will reveal a part of the truth; but be advised that...

' truth can be dangerous'...

( '~' don't worry, just enjoy)

Chapter 6 : The world you wish for.

Take Force 141, official base

07:11 P.M.

Helipad area

The weather was chilly and it was raining. a chopper was slowly landing. Macmillan and three other persons were standing in the rain waiting for the chopper to land completely. when the chopper was fully landed the first one to come out was Soap. Macmillan raised his right hand to signal her; his other hand shielding his face from the raindrops splashed by chopper's rotor blades.

" good to see you finally made it." Macmillan said. the other task force members came out of the chopper shortly after Soap. " we ran into a massive storm in our way. we were lucky this time though." Soap said walking towards the four SAS men.
" we can talk when we're inside Mac, I'm sure you're not going to keep us out here in rain." Price said when he was close enough to general to hear him. Macmillan smiled.
" this way." he said walking towards a building.
when they were inside the building Macmillan was the first one to speak. " Price, captain MacTavish, these three are your new teammates; for now. but you will have to choose some more recruits your selves; I'll bring you some personal files from the SAS. you have the option to pick them according to your own standards in the task force." " I think Soap can handle this herself." Price said looking at Soap waiting for her confirmation and she nodded. " alright then, let me introduce you to your new teammates; this man here is sergeant Edward Jason. boys call him 'swift'." Swift nodded. " this one is sergeant Daniel Davis; call sign, ' trigger' and that man over there is David Palmer. he's a pilot and his call sign is 'falcon'."

" good to see you all gentlemen, I'm captain John Price and this is your new CO in the task force captain Jane MacTavish." Price said. when he had introduced everyone he looked at Soap.
" this base is smaller than our former base but I think it's better than nothing; what do you think Soap?" Price asked.
" like you said, it's better than nothing and for the start I think this room can make a good briefing room." Soap replied after a moment of examining the room.
" this place still needs time to look like a real base." Macmillan said.
" it has a kitchen right?" Nikolai asked suddenly. Macmillan laughed. " of course it has, I think it is time for dinner; now that the introductions are over we can go to the mess hall." Macmillan said rising from his seat.

3 days later

03:12 P.M.

Soap and Price were sitting in their new office. Soap was reading the files and Price was sitting on a chair in front of her table helping her out with the task at hand. she rubbed her forehead. she was doing this job for hours without any breaks. " take a look at this one Soap." Price handed her a file. she read it carefully. " looks good; I add it to my list." Soap said. " I'm going to the kitchen, to find something to eat do you want me to bring something for you too?" Soap asked suddenly. " no, I'm not hungry." Price replied. " by the way where are those muppets when you need them?" Price asked. " I've sent them to make the training course ready. we're gonna need it for training new recruits." Soap replied and then she left the room.

after ten minutes she came back with a cup of tea in her hand. " here, I brought you a cup of hot tea." Soap gave him the cup. " have you heard the news?" Soap asked after she sat back on her chair.
" what news?" Price asked sipping his tea. " US is still at war with Russia ." Soap replied.
" even though they know it was all Makarov's plan; they don't seem to have plans for making peace." Price said.

" you know this better than me Price, war is just like a big fire in a jungle; when it's started, it's so hard to put it out; I don't think they will make peace any time soon." Soap said.
Price sighed. " this is a sad fact in our world Soap, they begin the war and after a while even themselves can't end it. it's a lot easier for you to destroy than to build. we all know what the end of this war looks like; when they are all tired of seeing a big pile of corpses and ashes under their feet, this war will be over." Price said.
Soap stared at the edge of the table. Price's words had reminded her of something. her main reason for signing up in the army, was a childish wish...

she had never told anybody her true reason for becoming a soldier.
from the beginning of her childhood, when she could tell what was right and what was wrong; she felt she was different from other kids.
she was an unwanted child in a 'not very usual' family and ' not very usual' were the only words for her to describe her family without saying too much about them. Ghost was the only one who knew everything about them; since he was the only one who had Soap's full trust. even Price didn't know a thing about her childhood; but Ghost did.

Soap didn't like to talk about her family; whenever she did, an unpleasant feeling filled her heart; it was hatred. why did she hate her family? only Ghost and she herself know why.
she had an older brother (two years older), he was a 'selfish jerk' (from her point of view). a mom, a dad, and after eight years of living in ignorance she had a sister ( that means she is eight years, older than her sister ).
she was eight years old when her mother finally told her the truth. " your father didn't want you; we already had a son and we didn't want to have another child any time soon. 'this is not my child' that's what your dad told me when I told him I was pregnant. he was so angry." her mother told her. she was just a kid. she didn't know how to react. but there was one thing that she understood very well, that they didn't want her.
" what happened next? " she wanted to hear the rest of it. " he gave me some money and told me to go to a hospital for abortion; I was so scared of your dad I couldn't say no. but the doctor convinced me not to do that.
she told me ' you are four months pregnant; that means your child is now a living thing you don't want to kill a human being do you?' and I returned home; when I told your dad what that doctor had told me, all of a sudden he got crazy and ran after me with a stick in his hand I was so scared; if his mother wasn't there and hadn't stopped him, he would have killed us both." now everything came together. she always wondered why they did all those horrible things to her. it was because they hated her; yet she thought it was what all of the parents do to their children; until her sister was born.
she wasn't jealous. first, she was so happy about it but after two years happiness turned into sadness.
' why don't they like me? I'm their child too aren't I ? why do they hurt me and not her? am I different from her? ' she watched their every movements while she and her sister and brother were growing, she was observing her parents and other people. she was a clever girl and they didn't know this.

the result was aweful, what she realized by just living a few years in this world.
' if my own parents do this to me, what will other people do?' and she lost her trust in every living creature. she realized that everyone was her enemy, the world wasn't a happy place, it was a cruel world where people hurt each other without regretting it.
and these thoughts shaped her character; whether they were good or bad, right or wrong. she was different and being different wasn't easy but sometimes so hard.

(people don't like difference. everything that is different, they call it weird or freak. but not every difference is a bad difference. when people get used to it, it's not weird anymore. in fact different means unknown. and you know what? we all are different from each other. differences make us humans. but too different? people still don't like it.)

even at school, she was different but in a good way. she was the star of their class. teachers loved her, they wished she was their own daughter but her own family didn't care about her good grades at school. she always wanted to impress her parents she thought if she got the best grades they would be impressed and then they would love her, but she was wrong.

and other students, they hated her. they wanted the attention of the teachers but with her shining in every class, it was impossible for them to have it and because of that they hated her.

at the age of 12 she decided to run away from home but she knew no one could survive alone in this cruel world, and she decided to wait until she grew up, then she was strong enough to live a life she wanted. she always felt like she wasn't a part of her family. they thought she was the cause of all of their miseries and because of that they did so many horrible things to her so horrible that at the age of 16 she suffered from several mental issues.

depression was one of them. she even tried to kill herself several times, to end her painful life, but every time, she remembered her goal, her childish wish, she wanted to save the world; to make it a better place to live. she was tired of all those lies, all those miseries. all unnecessary and even necessary evils. yes... necessary evils...
what she is doing right now is 'necessary evil' she kills terrorists and yes, they are enemies; but also people, they are humans and she has to kill them. this is what we call it ' necessary evil ' we have to kill, we have to destroy, we have to do the wrong things for a right purpose. she wanted to know why.
why does she have to put out fire with fire? that's the rule in this world isn't it.
nations answer war with war. there is no other choice. you can't blame nations for defending their people; but you should blame the one who started the war, the one selfish bastard who began to destroy other nations to gain more power.
she knew it was just a childish wish. she could never end the wars she could never make this world a better place.
when she was a child, every time she went in front of that window in the second floor of their house, when she saw the far far away trees and mountains she made a childish wish...
' someday I'm gonna become a hero and I will save the world. I'm gonna be the strongest soldier, because only the strongest can save them all.'

" Soap?" Price noticed her silence. Soap was lost in deep thoughts or maybe memories and didn't hear Price's words.
" what?" Soap asked.
" I said take a look at this one. you weren't paying attention were you? maybe you're tired, eh?" Price said.
" no, it's ok. I'm not tired." Soap said taking the file from Price.

same place

02:53 A.M.

Soap was sitting on a wooden bench in their new base. there was a single bench in the base. in front of a wall next to a lamp.
' three meters away from Ghost's room' Soap had measured the distance with her footsteps while she was walking. she was staring at the clear night sky. she loved the silence of the night because it was so peaceful and she could just sit there and think without distraction. whenever she couldn't sleep she came out of her room (if she could)and stared at the sky.
she was shivering visibly, because of the chilly air of course, and yet she preferred to stay out side and breathe the fresh air in.
suddenly a movement caught her eye.
the door of Ghost's room opened and he stepped out of his room. he had seen her from the window of his room. he knew Soap better than anyone else. he knew Soap doesn't do such crazy things without reason. something was wrong . he went straight towards her.
" what are you doing out here Soap? it's 3 A.M." Ghost said. a worried look on his face. Soap just stared at him she was still shivering.
" it's so cold out here Soap. c'mon, get up." Ghost took her hand to help her stand up.
" Soap you're freezing. get up, I take you to your room." Ghost said pulling her hand.
her cold hand had made him worried. she must have been there for a long time.
" please Ghost, I want to stay here a little longer." Soap finally said.
Ghost let go of her hand. " alright then, put this on." he took off his jacket and held it in front of her.
" put it back on Simon, you're gonna catch a cold." Soap said staring blankly at the ground. " you idiot... wait here." Ghost said then he ran towards his room. after a moment he came back with a jacket in his hand.
" here, now we both have jackets. put it on." Ghost gave her the jacket and this time she put it on without arguing. when she was done Ghost sat next to her.
" what is it this time Soap? a nightmare? a vision? a ghost? " this last one made him smile. Soap sighed heavily.
" doesn't matter Simon, doesn't matter." she replied. Ghost looked at her sadly.
" I'm not Price, he gives up easily when he thinks you don't want to talk about it but me, you know you can't fool me like that. I know there is something bothering you. now just open up like a good girl or I have my own ways of opening you up." Ghost said smiling. " c'mon Soap, you always tell me everything, even your worst nightmares." Soap shifted slightly after hearing that.
" so it's about a nightmare, eh?" Ghost asked. " aye, I had a nightmare, a horrible nightmare." Soap finally replied and then she went silent again.
" I can't read minds Soap, besides I don't have magic powers to guess your nightmare if you don't tell me about it." Ghost said. " but you guessed that it was about a nightmare, can't you guess the rest of it yourself?" Soap asked. now she wasn't shivering anymore.

" I think that was a lucky guess, or maybe I just read your body language. anyway tell me about your dream." Ghost said crossing his arms. " fine..." she took a deep breath.
" in my dream, I was chasing Makarov in a strange hallway; as I was chasing him along the hallway it became bigger and bigger until it turned into a very large and bright room. a room with no walls, covered in a blinding white color. I lost him there. I looked everywhere but there was no sign of him in that room. then I felt pain in my chest and when I looked down a knife was in my chest and my clothes were covered with my own blood. then I heard Shepherd's voice he told me ' you're too late' then I saw you; bloody and wounded a black barbed wire was around your neck and your chest.
I ran towards you but I hit a glass wall with my face. after that I don't know how but you were on fire. you were burning in front of me; screaming in pain. I tried to break the glass. I tried and tried but it was useless. that wall had blocked my way, I couldn't save you. then that bastard Makarov appeared in front of me, with a pistol in his hand. he shot me right in the head and then I woke up." (this is not the first time that she dies in her own dream, so don't worry) she covered her face with her hands. " it was awful." she said. " it's ok Soap, it was just a dream. see, I'm sitting right next to you." Ghost tried to calm her down. he knew when you recall a dream it is like you are seeing the same dream again; the only difference is that when you do that you are awake.

" I always tell you, don't think too much about me. you see, this happens when you love me too much." he said humorously. " it's only natural Simon, I almost lost you last time. you really scared me. I'm not ready to lose you yet." she sighed. " I'm so sorry; but you know that this is our job; we might get killed every day that we go to a new mission." he said.

" I know Simon, I know. but sometimes I wish we didn't have to be here. if we don't fight, people will get killed. we put our lives in danger so that they can live a happy and peaceful life but if there were no terrorists in our world if there were no wars, maybe Roach and the others could live longer instead of getting killed by a bastard like Shepherd." she sighed again. Ghost stayed silent for a moment.
" you know Soap, I would like to see the world you are talking about; but they are the people themselves who kill each other. you can't change people, they should change themselves. when they have power, they all do the same thing that Makarov's doing." Ghost said. Soap sighed again.
" you're right; I can't change people but maybe I can protect them; even if it means I have to give up my life for that. there are so many selfish people like Makarov in this world, but I'm sure there are still people like us too. because of them, I'm happy to sacrifice my life." she said.
" it was almost like a heroic speech Soap." Ghost said smiling. they were both silent for a moment until...
" Simon?" " what is it?" " if I die..." Soap said. " don't say it; I know what you're going to ask." Ghost said.
" no you don't." she said.
" yes I do." " I'm still your CO remember, you can't shut me up unless I do it myself; besides, you know you can't put up a fight against me and it's all because I'm the leader here. " Soap reminded him the limits but she wasn't serious and also, she knew that at that moment Ghost didn't care about the limits anymore.
"oh Soap, you think you can win a fight against me? don't make me tell others about your fears. do you know what happens when they find out about your fear of..." " alright, you win, don't tell them." Soap interrupted him. Ghost had chosen his strongest weapon against Soap.
Soap knew that Ghost could get out of her control if he wanted and she didn't want that to happen; although she herself, had given him such power ; in other words she has given him the power to act on his own sometimes and this has made him dangerous somehow; but you know Soap; she doesn't do such thing without a sensible reason.

" you see, I always win; because I know, and what they say about it 'knowledge is power'." Ghost said smiling. he felt like he had gained something precious with this little victory. " don't you think that I know your worst fears too Simon, I can tell them about your fears" Soap said. " I'm sure you don't do that. because you love me." Ghost said and yes, this was his other powerful weapon against Soap but she was already defeated.
" everyone loves you Simon, and how can I not love you? you're super handsome, you have beautiful blue eyes, you're as nice as an angel and this last one, you have saved my sorry ass hundred times." she said smiling.
" but can you say that in front of the others?" Ghost asked. a vicious smile on his face.
" I'd like to do that, but you know what, they will misunderstand my love. specially now that people have named all those disgusting things, 'love'." she said sadly. " you're right, they won't understand." Ghost said like he felt the same pain.

" feeling better now?" he asked suddenly maybe because he wanted to change the subject.
" aye mate a lot better." Soap said she rose from the bench Ghost did the same thing. " thank you Simon." she said. " you're welcome." Ghost replied smiling. " good night Soap." he said.
" wait your jacket..." Soap said. " keep it as a gift, I know you always wanted to have it." Ghost said. Soap smiled.
" you see, I always tell you Simon, you're an angel, a true angel." she said then she patted him on the back. " if I'm an angel, then what are you?" he asked laughing.
" I'm a mean monster; have you forgotten?"
Soap replied. " it's not realy like that." Ghost said.
" or is it?" Soap said smiling.
" Soap!" " fine, goodnight Simon."
" goodnight Soap."

task force is about to have new days before it; but it doesn't necessarily mean that they will be easy days, and because of that, task force members must get ready; ready to face these hard days; ready to lose and ready to win.

/: you know, there is a writing on one my clothes that says 'just be yourself ' and I thought it could be a useful advice for you as it is for me. so always just be yourself . I know it's kinda late for this but, I'd like to wish you a happy new year and a happy and peaceful life.
have a wonderful time my friends and always be nice to each other : ) SS.