Chapter 6. - Cubierta En Rosas. [Covered With Roses.]

Wherein death is shared

The cost of war is tallied.

And an enemy shares his secrets

-o-

"Her?" Ichigo inquired once more when the hollow did not answer him the first time. The male seemed to be looking down at the gravestone which he had just been mourning. He watched as the solemn face grew from composed to furious, a look that suited him much more because honestly Ichigo had never gotten use to the mellow, anti-violence Grimmjow that had been staying at his house. He stopped staring, however as he heard and then saw the small makeshift gravestone tumble over into the grass, the result of Grimmjow vindictively kicking the memorial. His face looked as if the thing has insulted him personally. Ichigo was outraged.

"What the fuck is your problem!" Ichigo had been patient with the man up until this point. Now he was truly testing that patience.

"I should ask you the same fucking question." The blue haired man hissed back. "What the hell is that, some kind of joke?" he pointed at the new pile of rocks on the ground. Ichigo had even taken the time to buy wax letters to spell out the the name of the deceased.

"Who the hell would joke over something like this? And moreover, what kind of person would knock over a memorial! The fuck is your problem?" It astounded the young shinigami that the ex espada did not have an ounce of respect, even for the dead.

Grimmjow clenched his teeth as he stared down at the shinigami. "How stupid can you possibly be? Don't go around making graves for people that ain't even dead."

Ichigo could feel his fury growing. How the hell would he know? After their battle, the Sexta was so close to death that he doubted he could hear what was going on around them. Even still there was no excuse. He had worked hard on that gravestone after he had come back from Hueco Mundo. He and sometimes Orihime had come to place roses on the makeshift memorial whenever possible. Just because she was a hollow didn't mean she did not deserve any less respect. She was a friend... a friend he had failed to protect. And to have an asshole like Grimmjow say that he was wrong to mourn someone he had lost... it was unforgivable. He didn't hold back as his arm retracted and threw a powerful punch right into the side of the hollow's jaw. Without the fractured skull there he was able to feel the real bone underneath nearly give to the force of his blow, that gave him a little satisfaction.

"You don't know shit." He growled as Grimmjow winced as he picked himself up off the floor. "All you know is that you weren't the one who killed Aizen. That's all you care about. You wouldn't know the first thing about caring for anyone other than yourself and your dumb ass pride. Weather you like it or not, people, good, important, innocent people that were close to me died in Hueco mundo and I will not have you mocking their memory just because of some grudge that you have against me!"

He wouldn't cry. Back in Las Noches Ichigo promised himself that he wouldn't let anything that happened make him break down. But this moment was a test of his will. Thinking about it... all of the people he's let down... all of the ones he wasn't able to save. It would be tasting a lie to say it wasn't tough on his soul.

Grimmjow had been punched plenty of times, more than he'd like to count in fact. Most were by enemies but none like this one before. This time it actually hurt. He stared up int the furious eyes of the Kurosaki and gave a glare of his own. "You're the one that doesn't know anything." Ichigo's eyes narrowed. "You were the one living so long in your self pity, I bet it never even occurred to you to go and ask the stupid hat guy what the fuck was up."

"Why would I?"

"Tch.. maybe then you might have learned that I'm not the only one he managed to save from Las Noches before it fell, dumbass." Grimmjow took pleasure in the look of confusion upon the shinigami's face.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his eyes were guarded but his face was curious. Grimmjow tsked.

"Fuck that. I ain't telling you nothin' you don't wanna hear. After all, I don't care about nothin' besides myself, right shinigami?

The scowl from before came back tenfold as Ichigo's anger unleashed anew. "Goddamn you, Grimmjow! Say what the fuck you mean or don't say anything at all."

"Tell me what happened in Hueco Mundo. What happened after you... after our fight. Tell me what the hell would make you build such a stupid thing," he gestured at the pile of rocks and the scattered wax letters.

"Why should I?"

Grimmjow sighed. Time in the human world has taught him great amounts of patience, he didn't think he could handle life here if he hadn't learned the skill. Dealing with the Kurosaki was an entire different subject all on its own. If he played his cards right he could get the shinigami to tell him all he wanted to know, though if he was too forceful or cocky, the entire thing could blow up in his face. It didn't help to know that the teenager hated him with a burning fury that could envelope him in an instant.

"Don't you want to know why I'm here? I bet it's just gnawing at your simple little shinigami brain." He couldn't stop the hint of malice that entered the words.

Ichigo averted his eyes for a moment before frowning deeper. "I could just go and ask Urahara why he sent you to me." True, he could ask, but there was not garantee that he would get a straight answer. He knew this, but there was little more he could do in order to retrieve any type of information pertaining to his situation.

"And how much do you think he'd actually be willing to tell ya?"

Ichigo sighed. "After our fight... Nnoitora found us, I tried to fight him but I was too worn out... Nel tried to protect me, she transformed, but only for a little while, enough to tire Nnoitra out some but not enough. He came after me again, but that was when Kenpachi stepped in and took over. I don't know if you saw at least that much." He didn't wait for the blue haired male's answer before he continued. "It turns out that it took Yama-ji as long as usual to make up his mind about entering Hueco Mundo." A laugh. "Orihime healed me and Nel before Ulquiorra came back. We fought... I had no idea how strong he was... though I knew he must have been holding something back considering how much you hated him."

Though Grimmjow never hid who in fact he did hate, Ichigo had known from the start that since Ulquiorra had been directly linked to Aizen, he was hated nearly as much as the former captain was by the sexta. The red head teen brought a hand up to absently scratch at the back of his head. "During our battle... things happened and in the end I won." Immediately he saw the anger wash over Grimmjows face, no doubt Ulquiorra was another in his book he felt that he deserved the right to get rid of. The male cursed silently before composing himself once more.

"What kind of things happened?"

"I'd rather not talk about it." In the short span of time he was allowed to fight Ulquiorra, he had managed to hurt two people that was very close to him. He did not like to remember the time he spent as his hollow self. It frightened him. What frightened him the most was the fact that he couldn't remember much of the incident. All he knew was that he was not himself, he could feel the hollow taking over, he felt it's anger, it's power. If he could have controlled it, it may have been a different story, but to know that power and then consequently have no hold over it... if Orihime had not called him back who knew what kind of destruction that thing might have done including ripping Ulquiorra to pieces.

Blue eyes narrowed. "Why not?"

"Because I don't remember most of it. I just... don't want to talk about it." He tried to mask his uncertainty with anger and Grimmjow narrowed his eyes at the boy in suspicion. Finally he sighed.

"Fine. What happened with Aizen?"

"Didn't Urahara tell you all this?" Ichigo grew frustrated. The feeling of helplessness he felt once the war ended, though it had been three years since hasn't left him since. If at all possible he would rather not dwell on things he promised to bury deep within his heart.

"No. He wasn't there during most of it. He told me what he heard when gathering the dead from that place. I know the outcome, I just want to hear your version of the story."

It was hard to retell what happened during the battle. It was frustrating to reveal that he had even given up his shinigami powers in the process, but it was necessary. In order to become stronger than Aizen, he needed to give up that which he loved. In truth he never lost his powers, they returned after a time, a quirk of the process that his idiotic father failed to mention. But it hadn't made his decision any easier, though if he had been put into the same situation again, he would happily do it over and over again in order to save the ones he could. As he got to the end of his story, Ichigo's voice grew more solemn.

"They wanted to try to save him, but I knew better. Old man Yama would have been lenient, far too lenient for a murderer like Aizen. He was weaker, all of the Espada and their Fraccion had been disposed of. He was nothing, but I couldn't let him off that easy. He was the one to make my choice all the easier. When he attacked, I struck back. I was just a little quicker." Grimmjow listened in silence as the boy told his tale. "To think if I hadn't trained with my father before... if I had been a little slower..." He visibly shivered. "After that though, everything was fine. The fake Karakura town disappeared, all of my friends were safe. I went back to Hueco Mundo to see what the toll was... it could have been a lot worse."

Grimmjow glanced away, he didn't like the affect the look in the substitute shinigami's eyes was having on him.

"I went to look for Nel. I lost track of her after leaving with Unohana to find Aizen. I found Orihime first, she was with Pesche and Dondochakka... the three of them had gotten caught in one of Yammy's rampages... They... couldn't save her in time."

Ichigo had promised himself that he wouldn't cry. He had been reminded dozens of times that it wasn't his fault. Rukia, Renji, Ishida, Chad and later on Byakuya and Kenpachi had done all they could to keep the tenth in his place but once he released his sword, his size was difficult to handle. Ichigo had always thought if he had spent a little more time fighting Yammy... if he had told Orihime to take Nel and run... things wouldn't have ended up like this. She wouldn't have...

Tears welled within the substitute shinigami's eyes but he refused to let them fall. He doubted Grimmjow would ever understand his anguish; he would much sooner mock the shinigami for his weakness. "It's all because of me... they never even found her body. 'She probably got eaten by a stronger hollow passing by.' That's what someone told me! So don't you dare say I don't know anything."

Grimmjow said nothing as he looked at the shinigami, three years showing how much he's matured out of the juvenile brat he fought on that first night so long ago. "You've really grown up, kid."

Ichigo blinked, thinking he heard wrong, but the small smirk on the former espada's face proved that he'd heard right.

"C'mon, you and me need to have a little talk with Mr. Hat."