Corn, a Glee fiction
I do not own Glee. Be kind, review!
When somebody does you a favor, it's only common courtesy to do something for them in return. Which is precisely what we were doing. That is, until Tweedle Wes and David barged in. Sure it looked like a compromising situation, but I can explain. There is a perfectly logical reason why Blaine's mouth is at my neck. And no, it's not for my enjoyment. My enjoyment is just a bonus.
"What are you two doing?" Wes set his textbook down on the common table. I put a hand to Blaine's chest in a lame attempt to get him off of me. He took the hint.
"I'm helping Blaine with his improvisational acting." See, I told you I had a reason.
"Since when does foreplay count as improve?" David asked. His book was still wedged underneath his arm, like he knew he was pushing boundaries and needed to be ready to run.
"No, really. Kurt was being corn on the cob, and I was being Meeko after not eating for three days." That raccoon can barely go three minutes, let alone three days without eating. Hence the urgency to attack my neck with a series of butterfly kisses.
"One should never choose roles on an empty stomach." I hadn't eaten since breakfast.
"What were you doing during lunch?" Wes gave a knowing stare. Or what he thought was a knowing stare, since he really didn't know the half of it. All he knew was what he saw.
"Studying for a test. Blaine was quizzing me." No one had to know the reward I got for right answers. It was only a peck. I managed to ace that test with flying colors by the way.
"You are quite the busy pair. We'll just leave you alone now." David dragged Wes out of the room and shut the door behind him. With any luck, maybe they're going to get food. Worst case scenario they press their ears against the doorway and listen in on our conversation. Not that there was much talking going on.
"Maybe we should try more human roles... Roxie and Velma?" Blaine stood from his spot on the couch.
I stood up to match my lips to the curve of his ear. "They weren't gay with each other."
"How do you know? Some people get pretty lonely in jail. Besides," his voice dropped, "number seventeen."
Before I even got the chance to get all hot and bothered over the concept of the spread eagle, David and Wes barged back in. Well, Wes barged. David stood in the doorway.
"I forgot my book." Wes headed back for the door. Turning on his heel he added, "You two are so gay together."
"Don't deny it. We saw you hold hands." David made his presence known, not bothering to come further into the room.
"Well if that's all it took then I'd say we've been together since day one. Which we weren't." Blaine slung an arm around my shoulders.
"You were like Slinky Dog. Wherever one went the other followed." Wes, please leave the room or I will be forced to hit you with your own textbook.
"He just used Toy Story against me! Last time I'll go to the movies with him." His hand left my chest to point angrily at his ex-movie buddy.
"I'll go to the movies with you," I said from my oddly comfortable position under his arm. You'd think with him being shorter that it'd be an awkward stretch. I looked down to see his heels weren't touching the ground. I leaned us back onto the top of the couch. His arm relaxed around me. Much better.
"You're going to pay eight dollars to make out with Blaine?" David grew tired of holding his large textbook and switched arms.
"Wes made out with Blaine?" I knew that it hadn't happened, but their reaction was too priceless to not say anything. Blaine leapt up from his spot next to me.
"No!" Their response echoed throughout the room and a few stray students in the halls lifted their heads from their texting to see what was going on.
"I would never kiss Wes. No offense." He rejoined me on the couch, returning his arm to its rightful position.
i.e. around me.
"None taken. You're not my type." Wes had said he had a girlfriend. He had flirted with Santana at our Breadstix performance.
"You're type is female." David patted his friend on the back. Wes looked irked, so David offered his arm to him. They linked elbows and left with their books.
"Is he sure about that?" Blaine tucked a hair behind my ear and trailed his fingers along the nape of my neck. It tickled.
"Oh shut up and kiss me." He obeyed. The gurgling of my stomach broke the moment.
"We really shouldn't have skipped lunch." His stomach spoke back to mine. Our stomachs agreed to make a quick dash to the local mini mart before our next class.
I survived the afternoon on Red Vines.
And that wasn't even the worst of it.
There are moments in my life where I question why I ever thought something doomed to fail would work. But I was bright eyed and optimistic. Moments earlier I had been lidded eyes and lustful. Finn's rather loud footsteps up the stairs cut that mood short. He knocked on the door to my room. It was open. My dad still doesn't trust me behind closed doors with Blaine around. Especially now that he knows Blaine and I are together. That stench you smell isn't raging hormones dad. It's Finn's socks.
Finn had caught on quickly to what was going on. I had already admitted to him my feelings for Blaine. Even if I hadn't, the arm wrapped around my waist spoke for me.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. Rachel asked me to give this to Kurt." He handed over a scented candle. "Something about olives? She said she was sorry about dating your gay best friend."
I tried to conceal a snicker at Finn's confusion. The gift was Rachel's way of holding out the olive branch. I ignored his misunderstanding and addressed a more important issue.
"About that. Turns out my gay best friend is really my gay boyfriend." I felt the arm around my waist curl tighter. Like, hah this is mine. Finn stood awestruck.
"Dude, I'm happy for you. I just don't know what to say. There's this whole hooray scene playing out in my head. I wish I could photocopy my thoughts and give them to you. But if guys could copy their thoughts there'd be no point in Playboy. Then the future generations wouldn't know what to imagine and then when it finally happened they'd freak out. Sure there's those health class diagrams but who honestly pays attention to those things? We cannot have deformed women running around!" Finn seemed as though he could go on for days with his one sided conversation. I put a halt to his pacing and wild arm motions. I couldn't have him breaking something.
"There's still the internet Finn." The internet had been helpful to my search in the past. Surely it had only expanded since I last tried.
"What about the people who don't get internet?" He leaned into our personal bubble. The one that we share, as in chez Klaine. A vein was bulging in his forehead. Wow, I didn't know Finn was so concerned about third world countries' sexual education. Because food and water aren't nearly as important.
"Pretty sure they don't get Playboy either." Blaine smiled cheekily. Finn backed up, and started out of the room.
"I am never leaving Ohio."