Author: Lily Kalanoa

Story: Desire to Believe

Genre: Naruto - drama

Rating: K/ pg 13

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my laptop, which put me into significant debt. All characters and series belong to their respective creators, I just like to torture them, heh heh.

Warnings: Nothing much, really.

Pairings: slowly growing Kakashi / Iruka

Summary: Iruka is twelve, the first Christmas after the fox attack and like the rest of the village, he just wants the holidays to be happy again.

Spoilers: Some for the fox attack, some for Kakashi's childhood and his father.

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Story 2 – The Desire to Believe

Part 3 – Presents

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Iruka had to do something. He couldn't just sit in an abandoned school until Christmas was over, he had to do something productive. He had to figure out a way to change Kakashi's mind. He stayed put until he was done crying, but then he rushed out into the village, a plan slowly coming to mind.

He'd make Kakashi believe in something, even if it was just that people could be kind if they were given the chance. If he got something the young jounin wanted and wrapped it up . . . but he didn't want to face Kakashi in person so that wouldn't do. No, that would made it even better! He could get a present for Kakashi and sneak it into the teen's apartment, it was perfect!

Oh. Iruka slowed, thinking of a flaw far more devastating than not wanting to deal with Kakashi directly. He had absolutely no idea what the boy would like as a present. That really did make things more difficult. Not to be deterred, Iruka forced his feet back into action and quickly made his way to the shopping district of Konoha.

He could hear the music from a full block away, little more than the same dozen carols sung over and over by various famous singers with the occasional interesting arrangement thrown in. Hearing them almost sent Iruka into tears again and he paused, ducking into an alley to regain his composure. Just last year, his house had echoed with those songs whenever his father had flipped on the radio, his mother often singing along with her melodious voice. Iruka scrubbed at his eyes and took a deep breath, determined in his plan despite all obstacles and distractions.

The market was over-run with shinobi doing last minute shopping. Within only a minute, Iruka saw three Uchihas, two Inuzukas and an Aburame scurrying from store to store. It was enough to make the twelve-year-old smile as the current song ended with a rather appropriate 'and a partridge in a pear tree.' Everyone was carrying boxes and bags, several laden down with rolls and rolls of wrapping paper. The first Christmas after the fox attack, everyone was making special efforts to bring the most joy possible to the holidays.

There had to be something here that would change Kakashi's mind. Iruka hurried to the first store and began browsing the books that were there. Kakashi seemed like the type that would like to read, but what would he like to read? Children's books were probably out of the question and anything like a weapons manual just didn't seem to fit the season. Would he like fantasy or science fiction, or maybe something historical? Iruka walked every single isle, finally leaving the store with a used copy of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas' and nothing else.

Maybe books were too specialized, he had no idea what interested the teen after all. Something more universal would be a better choice. This conclusion led Iruka down several streets, until he finally came to a store with a little bit of everything relating to clothes. Iruka again browsed the racks, pulling out sweaters and pants and hats to get a better look at them. But when he thought about it, he'd never seen Kakashi in anything other than his ninja uniform. He wasn't even sure what size clothes he wore, let alone what color would look good on him. He was taller than Iruka was, but also thinner. Frustrated, Iruka left the store empty handed. He needed to find something that anyone would enjoy, something that wasn't limited by size or interest.

Three shops later, Iruka had no idea what to do. He'd tried a figurine store, but didn't know what kinds of animals Kakashi liked. He'd tried a toy store, but that had been a waste of time as Iruka quickly decided Kakashi wouldn't want anything so childish. He'd tried a shop with all sorts of traditional goods, but had left disheartened when he discovered he couldn't have afforded anything from there. Now he was standing at the door of a weapons shop, certain that practical was the way to go. He was frozen in place, however, staring at the sign stating that no weapons other than standard kunai and shuriken would be sold to any child under chunin rank. Iruka wanted to get Kakashi something unique, standard issue weapons just wouldn't cut it.

"This is never going to work," he muttered, sinking to the ground and cradling his head in his hands.

After a moment like this, Iruka felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up hesitantly. The owner of the hand smiled, his eyes arching up behind orange tinted goggles. "Why are you crying, kid? It's Christmas, you should be happy!"

"I wasn't crying," Iruka mumbled defensively, but he scrubbed at his eyes again, feeling the tears there and knowing his eyes were still puffy and red. "I just . . . I don't know what to get him as a present."

The boy laughed a little and settled onto the ground beside Iruka. "Well why don't you tell me about 'him' and maybe I can help."

"It's this jerk jounin kid!" Iruka immediately lamented, throwing his hands into the air. "He's an ass and he made me angry so now I have to get him a present so I can prove I'm right, but I don't know anything he likes and-"

"Hold on a minute, hold on," the other boy said, urging silence. "Are you talking about Kakashi?"

Iruka blinked rapidly at the other. "You know him?"

"Yeah, we're on the same team. Why on earth are you getting Kakashi a Christmas present?"

Iruka hesitated, not wanting to get into another fight with one of Kakashi's friends. "You'll think it's stupid."

"No, come on. It must be important to you, to go to all this trouble."

Iruka frowned and hesitated, but finally nodded. "I want to make him believe in Santa Claus. Not the big guy in the red suit," he rushed to explain, turning wide eyes on the other boy. "When I say Santa, I mean the goodness he represents. The nice things people do for each other without any reason!"

The other boy was laughing, smiling openly at Iruka's distress. "That's wonderful!" he said once he got enough control to speak. "That's the best thing I've heard in a long time, I hope you can pull it off."

Iruka nodded, a little unsure. "Except, I don't know what he likes."

"That is a tough one. Well I know he likes dogs. And if you want to get him something practical, he uses 'hair glue' brand gel; don't let him tell you that's natural, he spends at least ten minutes fixing his hair every morning." The boy was still laughing slightly and he stood, helping Iruka to his feet as well. "He likes reading romances, if you can believe it, and action stories, too. Beyond that, your guess is as good as mine, though you can't go wrong with food gift cards. Listen, kid, I'll do you a favor and take him out for dinner when the sun starts to set, okay? That way you can get the present into his house without getting caught. All right?"

Iruka was beaming by this point and hurriedly agreed. "Thank you so much! I know I can change his mind."

The other boy waved a cheerful goodbye as Iruka ran off down the street, heading back to the bookstore. He found a three part book series that the clerk said was one of the best romances out right now as well as being great for action and drama and bought those along with a cute little dog statue. He wanted this present to be the best possible, so while he dropped those off to be wrapped, Iruka ran to the ramen stand to get a gift card for a few bowls. Really, he didn't know why he hadn't thought of that one sooner, everyone liked Ichiraku's! He retrieved the present, tucked the gift card in the ribbon, and rushed towards where he knew Kakashi lived. This was going to be perfect!

Iruka waited until the sun had set completely, not wanting to risk getting caught. He went right up to the front of the building, quickly scanning the mailboxes to find out which number Kakashi lived in, and finally found the one marked 'Hatake'. That just left getting into the place and Iruka hurried along the outside of the building until he found the right home. Carefully he tested one window, but it was locked. He scurried around to the only other window in the small apartment, but was sad to discover it locked as well. No matter, Iruka was a genin, he could get around a silly window lock, he'd defeated far more complicated security for some of his more extravagant pranks.

In minutes he was inside and Iruka found himself in what had to be Kakashi's bedroom. He grinned wide, thrilled that he was going to pull this off. He left the present in the center of the teen's mattress, making sure the tag reading 'From Santa' stuck up perfectly. It looked just like a picture! Confident in the power of his gift, Iruka went back to the window and slipped out into the cold night air. He couldn't wait until the morning came and he could see Kakashi's reaction to his gift.