Hi everyone! I'm so sorry for the late update! I've been REALLY REALLY busy with 11th grade- final term and it is CRAZY busy :| But I just got an opening before another busy next week so here we are!
tris-everdeen99: Thank you so much for all your lovely words and THANK YOU for pointing our mistakes, really! I will go about fixing them as soon as i get the time! you're amazing xx :)
Thank you Lil Wolf Syaoran 23, potterhead27, justanotherfangirl0509, Whatever-happens, and all the guests who reviewed- you guys are brilliant
Enjoy this one- there are quite a few Dramione moments in there ;) x
I flopped down on the couch beside Roland, yawning.
"You feeling okay, buddy?" I asked, noticing that he didn't look as excited as he usually did on friday evenings before our weekly dinner with the others.
"Yes." He said softly. "Is Mister Maffoy coming today?"
I sighed. "Honey, Mister Malfoy and I aren't friends."
"But I'm his friend, right?"
"Of course you are." I said, putting my arm around his shoulders and pulling him against my side. "How about we call one of your friends tonight and you can have fun with them?"
"No one will come." He said, sadly.
I frowned. "What are you talking about? We can call Josh."
"Josh wasn't nice to me. Nobody was nice to me this week."
My eyes widened with shock and I lifted Ro up and sat him on my lap facing me. "What happened?"
"When the teachers weren't listening, they were saying I was in the Prophet and that I didn't have a daddy because only my mummy loved me and-" Tears were welling up in his eyes and a tide of sadness washed over me. After the article about Roland had come out, we had reporters outside our house for two days before I finally called in a reporter I could trust and the next day, the actual story was printed on the front cover of the Prophet. We were still sent pitiful glances on the streets and we were sometimes stared at by strangers on the road and all I could do was tell Roland to ignore them.
"Hey." I said, wiping away his tears with my thumbs. "Of course your Mummy loves you but I'm not the only one- Uncle Harry and all love you so much and your grandparents and-"
"But why don't I have a daddy like others do? Is something wrong with me?"
"We spoke about this." I said softly, my heart breaking for the boy in front of me. "Not everyone has a daddy and a mommy. But that doesn't mean anything's wrong with you. Everyone loves you so much- don't think for even a moment that they don't. Why didn't you tell me that Josh and all were not being nice to you?"
"Because you were already sad. I didn't want to make you sadder." He said in a whisper and tears rose to my eyes. I pulled him towards me and hugged him tightly, kissing his head.
"I need you to tell me if something's wrong, okay?" I said, tears falling. "I'm sad because your grandpa isn't feeling well but if you're sad then that's going to make me more sad."
He nodded against my shoulder and we sat like that, clinging onto each other for a few minutes before I realised the others would be here in a couple of minutes and we needed to get the dining table in the kitchen ready. So I stood up with Ro and took him to the kitchen where we began getting the plates and glasses ready. Harry, Ron, Ginny and Pansy arrived within the next few minutes and dinner began. I noticed, however, that Roland had barely touched his food.
"Honey, you need to eat." I said. Everyone turned to him and he shook his head. "Why don't you want to eat? Aren't you hungry?" He shook his head again. "You haven't eaten since five, you must be hungry. Do you not like the pasta?"
"What's going on, Ro?" Ginny asked, nudging him.
"Nothing." Roland said, picking up his fork but making no move to use it.
I huffed and pushed my chair behind. There was only one reason for his behaviour and therefore only one easy way to fix it. I excused myself and went to make a floo call. Finally, I was looking into Malfoy's living room.
"Granger?" He asked, kneeling down in front the fire.
"I know this is a lot to ask but Roland- he's-"
"What is it? Is he okay?" Malfoy asked.
"Yes- he's okay. He just wanted you to come for dinner today with the others and I think he's upset because you're not here."
"I wasn't exactly invited." He said.
"I know." I sighed. "I was just wondering, for Ro's sake, if- if you'd like to come over for dinner."
"You want me to come have dinner with you?"
"The others are here as well and- fine, maybe this was a bad idea. I'll just- sorry for bothering you."
"Go for the boy's sake, Draco." I heard Narcissa say and I assumed she was in the living room with her son.
"I'll come over, Granger- give me access to your floo."
"Of course." I said. I disconnected the call and changed my wards to allow Malfoy through and in a few moments, he was stepping through my fireplace, dressed in a dark blue t-shirt and khaki shorts which he brushed down as he stepped out into the living room. "Thank you for coming." I said and lead him to the kitchen. "Hey, Ro- look whose here." Roland looked up and his eyes widened and became instantly brighter at the sight of Malfoy. Judging by the expressions on the faces of the other four adults, they were surprised to see the youngest Malfoy and even more surprised to see how Roland reacted to him.
"Mister Maffoy!"
"Hey buddy." Malfoy said and sat down beside him. In my seat. Ginny opened her mouth to say so but before she could, the phone in the kitchen rang and I went to answer it.
"Hello?" I said.
"Hermione?" It was my mother. And she didn't sound good.
"What's wrong, mum?" I immediately asked.
"It's your father." She whispered.
"What happened to him?" I asked, fear washing over me.
"He had a breathlessness attack." She said.
"Mum, the others are over for dinner and I'm in the kitchen. Give me a few seconds- I'll call you from the phone in my room." I hung up and sprinted upstairs to call her back. "Yeah, mum. What happened?"
"He had an attack fifteen minutes ago and the nurse wasn't able to help him so we had to rush him to the hospital. I'm there right now and they just managed to get him breathing again."
"Oh, god." I said, my hand covering my mouth. "What are they saying?"
She took a deep, shuddering breath. "Two weeks at the most."
I squeezed my eyes shut and bit down on my lower lip when it began to tremble. "Mom..." I choked out.
"We knew it was coming, 'Mione. Just stay strong and come visit him as soon as you can."
"We'll be there tonight." I said.
"Come tomorrow. The doctors have done everything they can and he's okay for now. He's asleep. Come tomorrow when he'll be awake to see you and Ro."
"Tomorrow then." I promised. "Take care, mum. If you need anything- even for me to come tonight, tell me. I'll leave Ro with one of the others."
"Of course, dear. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Love you, mum."
"I love you too."
I let the phone slip from my fingers and onto the bed as I rubbed my face with my hands, forcing myself to breathe and calm down. I had guests downstairs. I took a few deep breaths and returned to the kitchen where everyone- save for Harry, who had gone to the bathroom- looked up as soon as I entered. I forced a smile before looking at Ro, who was eating his pasta with Malfoy's help. My eyes met his and gratitude swept over me. "Thank you," I mouthed and he nodded before turning back to his own dinner.
"Do you want to sit and eat, Hermione?" Ginny asked, gesturing to Harry's empty seat. "Harry's done eating and so are we."
"That's okay, Gin, I'm not hungry." I said, taking my plate to the sink and then returning for their's.
"It's almost nine and it's been a long week- I think I'm going to head home." Ginny said, standing up. I knew she was only doing it so I could deal with my emotions- something had clearly happened over the phone, they had realised. "Pansy? Ron?"
"Yeah, us too." Pansy said, helping me clear the table.
"It's fine- I'll do it." I quickly said. I needed things to do. I couldn't afford to cry in front of Roland or Malfoy. Both for different reasons. Pansy moved to help me anyway but Ron caught her arm and shook his head, knowing that even if I didn't want to do it, I just needed to.
Pansy squeezed my arm comfortingly and Ron kissed my cheek before they left. Ginny hugged me tightly, even though I didn't quite respond and started leaving when Harry walked through the kitchen.
"Are we leaving?" He asked, looking between Ginny and me.
"You're staying to help Hermione clean up." The read-head said, looking pointedly at him.
"He doesn't have to." I said, beginning to wash the dishes in the sink. This was obviously followed by some unspoken argument which resulted in Harry coming to stand next to me.
"You wash, I dry," He left no room for protests and I didn't have the energy so I nodded. Within the next few seconds, try as I might, I couldn't hold the tears back. "Hermione...what happened? Is it your dad?" He asked softly and I nodded, a tear slipping down my cheek. "Is he- is he- gone?" I shook my head, scrubbing the dish in my hands with all my remaining energy. Stay strong, Hermione, I scolded myself. "Did he have an attack?" I nodded, putting the dish under the running water and watching through a blurry vision the soap being rinsed away.
"Okay, kid- let's go wash your hands." I heard Malfoy say from behind us and chairs scraped against the kitchen floor as they left. Harry put the dish he was wiping dry on the cloth on the counter and placed his hand on my shoulder. I squeezed my eyes shut and the tears poured out onto my cheeks and dripped off to mix with the water in the sink. I felt him move his other hand and shut the tap off, leaving his hand there.
"Hermione." And I broke. I released a pained sob and he pulled me against him, wrapping his arms around my back. I pressed my face into his shoulder, my wet and soapy hands caught between us. "Let it out." And I did. I cried for my father. For my son. For the two weeks I had left with one of them and then the four months after that which I had with the other. And then what? Then I would be alone. So alone. It wouldn't just be an empty house. Everything would feel empty. Everything would be gone. And it just...hurt. That was it. It hurt. And there was nothing else to feel but the pain.
"Roland! Wait!" I heard Malfoy call and I froze in the circle of Harry's embrace. Roland couldn't see me like this. My son could NOT see me like this. I was pulling myself away from Harry when I heard him in the kitchen-
"Mummy?" I wiped at my eyes hastily before turning slowly, in time to see Malfoy reach the doorway of the kitchen behind Roland. I glanced at him and our eyes locked for a moment before I looked down at Roland and knelt down in front of him.
"Hey, baby." I said, placing my hand on his cheek.
"Why are you sad? Did I do something?" He asked in a small voice.
"No! No, not at all!" I said, shaking my head quickly. "Remember I told you that you're grandfather wasn't well? That he was ill? Honey, he's in the hospital right now. He's going to leave us in two weeks."
"Leave us? Where's he going to go? Will we ever see him again?"
I pursed my lips and bit down on the inside for a long second, trying to stem the tide of tears that wanted to break free. "He's going to a place called heaven. It's a happy and safe place and he won't hurt anymore. But we won't see him again, I'm afraid. Once someone goes there- they can't come back."
"Not even with magic?" He asked softly.
I shook my head, tears welling up in my eyes. "I wish, Ro. I wish magic was powerful enough to do that but it's not."
"When I grow up, will you leave me like that?"
I closed my eyes and the tears spilled out. The irony in his words struck me in the heart, shattering it into further uncountable pieces. 'When I grow up, will you leave me like that?'
"No, Roland, I promise you that I will NEVER leave you." I said, choking back a sob. "I promise."
"Grandpa won't be able to come to my birthday next week will he?" Roland asked, his eyes welling up with tears as well.
"No, baby, I'm so sorry." I said, wiping away his tears with my fingers.
"Then I don't want to have a party." He said. "If grandpa can't come, I don't want one anymore. I want to be with him because he won't be there for my birthday next year."
I pulled Roland into my arms and clutched him tightly, sobbing as I kissed his face and then buried my face into his hair, my tears soaking his shirt. But I didn't let go of him. I couldn't let go of him. So then when the time would come, how would I?
"I love you, Roland. I love you so much and I need you to always remember that no matter what happens, okay?" I whispered. He nodded.
"I love you too, mummy." I breathed him in before standing up.
"It's late," My voice came out choked. "Why don't you go upstairs and get ready for bed and I'll be right there?" Roland nodded and saying goodnight to Harry and Malfoy, left. I had almost forgotten that Malfoy was there.
"Do you want me to stay?" Harry asked, walking towards me.
I shook my head. "I'm sure Ginny's waiting, worried sick as she usually is, at your place. It's been a long day- go sleep." He nodded and hugged me tightly, kissing my forehead, before telling me to call him if I needed anything and leaving. I finally looked at Malfoy but before I could say anything, he spoke.
"Are you sick?"
"Excuse me?"
"Are you ill, Granger?" He asked, his expression serious. "Is that why Pansy was crying? Because she knew Roland would be alone soon?"
He was right- but he had just swapped over roles. "Malfoy, please." I begged. "Drop it. I'm not telling you- I'm asking you. No, I'm begging you. Please." He stared at me for a second before nodding. I was surprised and doubtful but didn't comment on it. "Thank you."
"Are you going to bake me another cake?" He asked and in the moment, I laughed slightly.
"Not for what happened in Diagon Alley. For everything you've done for Roland. Especially- dropping anything you were doing and coming here for him with the only explanation that he wanted to see you. There aren't a lot of people that I've known who have been so open. And thank you for taking him out of the kitchen earlier."
"Woah, there, Granger," He said, holding his palms up, facing me. "You sound like you're warming up to me- we don't want any misunderstandings here, do we? I get it- you're thankful- and you're welcome. But maybe, in a way, I'm doing this for myself. In case you've somehow miraculously forgotten- not a lot of people in Britain like me very much- even if he IS just four, your kid's giving me a chance. And I'm taking it." I nodded. "Take care, Granger." He said before leaving the kitchen. I heard the fireplace roar up and then everything was silent. I went upstairs to Roland's room and helped him get ready for bed.
"Are you and Mister Maffoy friends now?" He asked as I tucked him into my bed and sat down beside him.
"Not yet. But maybe some day we will be." I said honestly.
"Then he won't be alone." Ro said, rubbing his eyes. I doubted I'd be able to help fill any of Malfoy's loneliness but I wasn't going to say so and break my son's heart so I simply nodded. "That's good."
"Go to sleep, I'll be up in a few minutes." I said, kissing his forehead. "Goodnight. Love you, Ro."
"Love you too, mummy." He said, already half asleep. I stared at him, smoothening his hair away from his face, wishing that Malfoy had been right when he had asked if I was ill- I would trade places with my son in a heartbeat if I could.
And that's done. Please please please review- it would mean the world to me and genuinely help so much during this period of time in school! Love you guys 3