Disclaimer: I don't own Zexion. Or any other Nobodies, y'know.
6: Ways to make Zexion beat you to death with his book.
Pull out a tape measure and measure how tall his is at any random time
.
Replace his Lexicon cover with one that says 'Zexion's Diary' and decorate it with pink love hearts
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Place random stories of Yaoi in it and give it to Axel
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Continuously ask for the meaning of random long words such as Hippopotomonstroses quipedaliophobia (One word) and Lopado temacho selacho galeo kranio leipsano drim hypo trimmato silphio parao melito katakechy meno kichl epi kossypho phatto perister alektryon opte kephallio kigklo peleio lagoio siraio baphe tragano pterygon (One word also XD) (1)
.
Get him drunk enough so he passes out
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Put him in Marluxia's bed (though inform Marluxia beforehand)
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Laugh hysterically as he freaks out and tries to remember what happened
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Play with a feather in his face when he's trying to read
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Rip out the last page in his book
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Glue his head to the pillow
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Dye his hair bright pink
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When he awakes, say, "Gee Marly did you get short or what?"
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Glue all his books to the ceiling
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Replace the pages in his book with pages of Zemyx stories
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Watch him freak out again
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Adopt 20 kittens
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Sign the adoption papers with his name, and set them loose in his room
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Leave Xigbar's socks under his pillow
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Glue something extremely smelly, possibly 4 month old cheese, somewhere in his room so he cant remove it
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Run around the castle screaming that it's Zexion's birthday. Inform the other members about 'Birthday Punches'
……
Zexion ripped the paper in half and sighed angrily, calmly standing from his seat and walking out the door. "So that's what happened to my Lexicon…"
…...
Poor Zexion, he wont trust anyone ever again.
(1)- they're actual words. Hippopotomonstroses quipedaliophobia means "fear of long words, and Lopado temacho selacho galeo kranio leipsano drim hypo trimmato silphio parao melito katakechy meno kichl epi kossypho phatto perister alektryon opte kephallio kigklo peleio lagoio siraio baphe tragano pterygon means "name of a dish compounded of all kinds of dainties, fish, flesh, fowl, and sauces.". Lol.
Next is Saix! Oh boy, he's always the funniest to torment!