IT IS NO LONGER "ONE YEAR EARLIER!" I HAD TO CHANGE IT TO 5 WEEKS EARLIER FOR TECHNICAL REASONS!

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And THANK YOU LOTZ to Lisbon94: you have been SO NICE for the past few days and I have thoroughly enjoyed talking to you! AND you have a kick-a** story! :D Haha! PMing while I sleep! Sry for everyone else who doesn't know that is, kinda an inside joke-type thing between us! :D Hehe!

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Disclaimer- If I owned The Mentalist, I wouldn't be writing on here.

Jane sat in the emergency room with his head in his hands. He had never been this scared in his whole life. Lisbon could be dead. What if she was? What would he do without her?

"Mr. Jane?" a nurse walked up to him, bringing him back from his disturbing thoughts.

"Yes?" he asked, exasperated and rubbing his eyes.

"I just have a couple of questions to ask you about Ms. Lisbon."

"Okay." he adjusted himself in his chair.

"How did you find her?" she asked.

Jane opened the door slowly. He knew Lisbon wouldn't want to talk, but she left her purse in the car.

"Lisbon I have your purse." he walked into the room cautiously. There was no answer. He looked in the living room, bedroom and bathroom before slowly making his way into the kitchen. "Lisbon?" he called again before his eyes appeared on her lifeless body on the floor of the kitchen, "Lisbon!" he yelled. He threw her purse on the table and ran to her, collapsing beside her on the floor, checking her pulse. It was slow, maybe 7 beats per minute, if even. "Lisbon, can you hear me?" he yelled. She made no response. He looked at her. She was almost blue. Jane put a hand on her forehead. She was cold to the touch, almost unbearably cold. He hated to see her like this and his eyes teared up at the look of his colleague, his friend, his girl-friend, on the floor, practically dying before his eyes. "Lisbon!" he began again. She couldn't hear him, she wasn't responding.

"And, did you try to do anything to revive her?" the nurse asked as he finished explaining.

"Lisbon!" He yelled again. Now she wasn't breathing at all. He tried to wake her up. She didn't move. Whipping out his cell phone, he dialed 911 and held his cell phone between his shoulder and ear as tipped Lisbon's head back. He spoke to the operator briefly and told him the address and the situation. He was off the phone quickly and soon was holding his ear up to her mouth. He heard no sign of breathing and felt nothing as he moved his cheek in front of her mouth to check for air. Quickly checking one last time, he watched for any movement of her chest. Nothing. He pinched her nose and covered her mouth with his. It was something he had longed for for 5 weeks, but he never wanted it to be a matter of life or death. Ever. He placed the heel of his hand on her chest, pressing down and breathing again into her mouth. He did this over and over, trying to bring his Lisbon back to life. He couldn't give up. He'd be letting her down. He wouldn't give up. He checked again for breathing, this time, she was. It was extremely slow, much slower than any healthy rate. He picked her up and held her in his arms, rocking her back and forth.

"It's okay, Lisbon, I'm here." he ran his fingers through her hair and he felt Lisbon's head moved slightly. She was awake. A rush of relief moved through him. "Come on, just stay with me."

"So she was responsive after you tried to revive her?" the nurse wrote notes onto her clipboard.

"For a few minutes." Jane's voice began to quiver, "she was in and out until the paramedics got there."

"Okay," she continued to write, "do you know of any allergies she has, anything she is allergic to."

"I really don't know." Jane felt helpless, placing his head back into his hands.

"Alright, thank you for your help." she walked away, leaving him with his thoughts.

Now he was really alone, except for the woman working the front desk. There was no one else in the waiting room. He thought back to Lisbon, who right now could be dead for all he knew. How was he going to get through this pain again? The pain of loosing someone who meant everything to him. He could still see her bright eyes and her big, sweet smile. Jane stood, he couldn't stay in one place for too long without his mind wandering back to her. He walked around the hospital; down the long hallways and around the many corners. He saw a few people waiting outside a recovery room, worried expressions on their faces. He smiled at them, each of them smiled back. They were definitely forced smiles, but, for that matter, so was his.

He walked a little more, winding up in the cafeteria. Jane waited in line with a tray. He grabbed a coffee and a water, along with one cup of jello. He sat at a table alone and began to eat slowly.

"Dr. Allen, please report to operating room 11 on the third floor. Dr. Allen, please report to operating room 11 immediately."

Jane came to an end of his jello and gulped down his coffee. He put his water bottle under his arm and dumped out hist tray of trash. He continued to walk.

Everything had gone wrong those 5 weeks ago when Thomas had died. It brought more painful memories for Lisbon that she couldn't keep bottled up inside any longer. She had become almost a different person. Some one Jane didn't know or understand. He wished he could have been there for her more. He wished...

"Mr. Jane?" the nurse he had talked to earlier came running up behind him. He spun around to see a saddened look on the nurse's face as she pulled him aside into an examining room, closing the door behind them for privacy.

"Do you have news on Teresa?" he begged.

"Yes, I'm afraid so." she looked down, but then remembering her training, she looked Jane in the eye as she spoke. He could tell it was hard for her and he dreaded the worst was about to come from her mouth.

"Im afraid your wife has had a seizure during surgery." they had assumed she was his wife and he had not corrected them as it was the only way he would get information about her. "the doctor wanted me to warn you that she has a low chance of making it through the surgery. He is trying his bet though and we will keep you updated throughout the procedure."

Jane's knees almost buckled as the nurse's words processed in his head. Lisbon might not make it.

"I... I just need a moment." Jane said, leaning onto the wall for support.

"No problem." the nurse said quietly, exciting the room.

Tears began to silently stream down his cheeks.

Please, please God, please don't kill Lisbon. Take me instead, she doesn't deserve this. I've done far worse in these last few years than she has done in her lifetime. Please don't take her. It's not her time. She has her whole life ahead of her. I need her. She needs me. Please, don't take her.

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