June 19th, 1994

It's funny to be writing about this now. My husband would probably go nuts if he knew I was doing this. Well, if he ever finds out, let him. This is my past, my story. Anyway, I was itching to see Jack again after he helped me out, but I wasn't sure how to go about it. Then I remembered the party on Saturday, and that I was going with Jason. My heart sank. I began to wonder if Jack was going, afterall Shawn O'Neal was in college himself, so maybe.. still, I had Carol on my back. Luckily I'd managed to stop her from phoning the police. I just needed some time before that happened. Still, when would be the right time to turn Wayne in? Would there ever be a right time? Or was I just too afraid?

---

Kate awoke extremely early the very next morning, and slowly began to realize that this would be one of the longest days in her entire life. Carol hadn't stopped urging her to call her mother, and to Kate's dismay Claire had even been doing the same. Groaning, she buried her face into her pillow. She hadn't gotten much sleep last night, she'd had one of those dreams again. This time, Wayne had been telling her not to call the cops, or else he'd kill her mother, and then come for her, too. It had seemed so real that Kate had actually woke during the night with tears streaming down her face. Luckily, Claire was sound asleep, Kate noticed as she looked to her side. She could hear Claire's light snores, suggesting that her friend was in a deep sleep and not about to wake up anytime soon. Kate then checked the clock on Claire's bedside table, and saw that it was only four in the morning.

She began to reminisce, something she rarely did. It wasn't like Kate to dwell on the past, it just wasn't in her nature. But for once she was, wishing that they'd never met Wayne, that her mother had never been charmed by him in the first place. They'd been doing okay, even after Sam's, Kate's father, death. Over a year had passed and Kate had been glad to see that her mother was finally moving on. However, what she didn't expect to find one night as she returned home from school, was another man in their house, sitting at the kitchen table, drinking a beer.

That's when it started. The moment they were introduced. Kate disliked him instantly, and knew he could probably tell. He always had this look in his eyes, like he wanted something, and Kate had always known what that was. At first things had been fine. Then, the quarreling had started, over Wayne of course. Kate made sure she bitched about Wayne to her mother atleast once every day, hoping that maybe if she did it enough her mother would see sense and leave him. No such luck, apparently her mother was drawn to Wayne like she had been with no other man, not even Sam.

"You need to eat breakfast," Diane said, throwing her daughter a stern look as Kate made for the front door.

Kate shook her head, hand already on the doorknob. "I can't be late, mom. I told you, I'm meeting Claire."

"I don't care, Katherine," Diane replied briskly, shaking her head, "Sit down, and you can be out of here in ten minutes."

Kate was in no position to argue with her. "Fine, I'll get some toast or something and eat it on the way."

Diane didn't appear to have a problem with this. Ten minutes later, Kate was nibbling a piece of toast as she prepared to walk out the door. She looked hesitantly back at her mother, wondering whether it was worth mentioning Wayne, now that she was apparently in a good enough mood to discuss it. "Mom?"

Diane looked up curiously. "What is it? I thought you said you needed to be out of here in ten minutes."

Forget Claire, Kate thought to herself, feeling slightly guilty, but this was important. She needed to make herself heard.

"It's about Wayne," she started, setting down her things and sitting back down at the table.

"We are not going through this again," Diane snapped, glaring back at her daughter.

"We have to," Kate said impatiently, "I don't like him, Mom. You must know that by now."

"I know it," Diane breathed, getting up and starting to clear the table. That was how she kept her cool, Kate knew. If she was ever angry or upset she'd just clean, or find a way to keep herself busy. "I've just been trying to work out why you dislike him so much, Katherine. He's been nothing but good to you, to us both, and you still treat him like he's doing something wrong. I don't understand it, I doubt I ever will."

"It's not that," Kate said exasperatedly, standing up and walking over to the sink where her mother stood. "Listen to me, Mom! I just don't like him, okay? There's something about him that makes me nervous, or scared even. It's the way he looks at you, okay?"

Diane turned around and faced her daughter, a furious look on her face. "He loves me, Katherine. I love him. Until you learn to understand that.."

Kate shook her head. "I can't believe this," she said in disgust, turning on her heel and grabbing her things.

"You're finally leaving?" Diane asked in a mocking tone, "Good. Maybe later on you'll have the decency to apologize to me. And Katherine, Wayne's coming over later, so I don't want you saying anything like this to him, understand? Better yet, don't go near him. Not until you can learn to respect him."

"I'll never respect him," Kate said through gritted teeth, "He doesn't respect you. He doesn't respect anyone. The pig.."

If she'd been near enough, Kate knew her mother would have hit her for saying that. As it was, Diane just stood motionless, watching her daughter as if seeing her for the first time, then seemed to relax. "You'd better go, or you'll be late. G'bye, Katherine."

Kate just stared at her, then left the house, feeling worse than she had in a very long time. She knew Claire would be waiting for her, probably pissed at the fact she'd had to wait an extra ten minutes. Still, Kate barely cared. She knew things were only set to get worse regarding Wayne. She didn't trust him, and knew there would be trouble soon if she didn't try to do something.

---

That day, Diane had asked Wayne to move in with them, and Kate had known it was just to spite her. To her horror, Wayne had accepted, and a week later they were all living under the same roof. Thinking back to that time, when her mother had regarded her with an icy indifference after Kate's harsh words about Wayne, made Kate sad, yet she didn't feel an ounce of guilt about it. Her mother had chosen to get seriously involved with Wayne, and the worst had happened. The marks on her arms had began to appear a few weeks after Wayne moved in. Then one day she showed up after work with a black eye. Kate had been too nervous to comfort her, and too nervous to confront Wayne. Now, sitting here alone in Claire's room, she wondered how her mother was doing and whether she should go and visit her. Still, now wasn't the time for that. She'd have to leave for the party soon.

The last day of school had been considerably average, and Kate had been relieved when it had finally ended. Claire had spent the entire day going on about how this summer would be a total blast, while Charlie hadn't said much; he'd been too busy writing songs, as usual.

Tonight was quite important for Kate. She couldn't actually believe she was going through with it. The last time she'd been on a date was with Tom, though his idea of a date had been sitting at his house, eating pizza and drinking beer while watching some dumb action flick. It had been a while since she and Tom had broken up, and she was quite nervous about going out with someone new. Still, she'd forgotten what it was like to be with someone, to love someone, so she was quite looking forward to it. Besides, Jason seemed like a nice enough guy. She hadn't fallen head over heels in love with him when they'd first met, but maybe she could grow to really care about him if they spent enough time together.

After applying her make-up, Kate stood and walked over to the large mirror by the window, and took a look at herself. She was wearing a halter top, mini-skirt and heels. Jason had called her earlier and when she'd asked what would be okay to wear, he'd replied, "Just something casual, or whatever you want." Kate had gone with the latter. Besides, she suspected many of the other girls would be wearing the same sort of outfit anyway. It was a party, afterall.

Just then, Claire entered. "Wow, you look great!" she remarked, grinning at Kate, who blushed.

"Is it not a bit much?" Kate queried, stealing another glance at herself in the mirror.

Claire shook her head. "No way, you look fantastic, honestly. Just go and have a good time, okay?"

"Yeah," Kate said with a small smile, though her smile faded when she realized that Jason would be here in under ten minutes to pick her up. "Is Jason here yet?"

"That's what I came up to tell you," Claire said, "he's downstairs, waiting for you."

Kate's heart jumped and she began to panic. "Now? But I might need a few more minutes.."

"No ifs, ands, or buts," Claire said firmly, pushing Kate out of the room, "You look fine, better than fine actually."

Kate looked back at her and suddenly felt a pang of guilt. "Aren't you going to come?" she asked.

"And steal your thunder? No way," Claire said, and the two of them giggled. "No, I'm seeing Charlie tonight anyway, so I can't."

"Use protection!" Kate joked, and Claire jabbed her hard in the ribs, "I'm kidding, I'm kidding!"

"Yeah, whatever," Claire said with a grin, "Now get down there, missy, and for pete's sake enjoy yourself!"

Kate did as she was told, atleast the first part, and followed Claire downstairs to meet Jason. He looked like he always did, dressed in a casual manner, in a plain blue shirt and jeans. Kate hoped to God that she hadn't overdone it and dressed up too much for this. Still, Jason didn't look disappointed.

"Kate," he said as she walked up, "You look.. great."

"Uh, thanks," Kate mumbled, too shy to look up.

"Wanna get going?" Jason asked, and when Kate managed a nod he grinned. "C'mon, then. Cars just outside."

Kate glanced at Claire, who nodded and winked. However, Kate still wasn't sure she wanted to do this. She hadn't seen Jack since the day he'd helped her with Wayne, and thought maybe he was avoiding due to what had happened. The thought made her feel quite uneasy, but she was soon shaken out of it by Jason, who led her outside, closing the door behind them. As they approached his car, Kate was aware of a sinking feeling in her stomach, but tried to ignore it. Tonight wasn't about worrying over Jack or Wayne or anything else. She just had to try to enjoy herself, like any girl her age.

"Ready to go?" she heard Jason ask.

"Yeah," Kate replied, and opened the passengers door and got inside.

---

The party was already in full swing when they arrived. Kate could see atleast a dozen cars pulled up outside, and began to get nervous again. She didn't often go to house parties like this, and she hadn't done in a long time. "It'll be cool," Jason reassured her, though this didn't make her feel any better.

As they started up the drive and up to the front door, Kate's heart began to pound in her ears. She wondered what kind of people would be in there, and whether they'd like her or not. Jason seemed oblivious to the fact that she would rather just turn around and go home, and he rang the doorbell. A moment later, a girl with long, dark hair opened the door and stared the two of them down. "Hey, Jase," she said cheerily, giving him a hi five. She then turned to Kate and studied her before asking, "Who's this?"

"This is Kate," Jason said, and Kate felt him put his arm around her. "I invited her."

The girl nodded. "Cool. Well, I'm Tonya. Come on in."

They did, and Tonya closed the door behind them. It was so loud inside that Kate could barely hear Jason when he asked if she wanted anything to drink. "No thanks!" she yelled over the blaring stereo, "I'll just go and sit down!"

"Sure!" Jason yelled back, and disappeared with Tonya into the kitchen.

Kate glanced around and wondered what she should do next. She walked into what she thought was the living room. Most of the people in there were on their feet and dancing to the music, and most of them also looked like they'd had more than a couple of beers already, though it was barely past nine. Kate stared around the room, trying to find someone she recognized, but most of them looked like they were in college, some even looked younger than her.

Jason reappeared at that moment with two beers. "Here you go," he said, offering one to her.

Kate was about to say no, but she didn't want to make it seem like she wasn't having a good time. Jason had asked her to come here with him, so she had to make it seem like she was enjoying herself. "Thanks," she said, taking it from him and taking a drink. She didn't like to drink often, but this didn't taste half bad. She took another drink and smiled up at him.

"You wanna dance, or..?" Jason started, looking slightly uncomfortable for the first time since picking her up.

"Can't you introduce me to some of your friends?" Kate said, and mentally kicked herself.

Jason nodded, "Yeah, sure. Shawn's just back there, and this is his party, so.."

Kate didn't really want to meet any of Jason's friends, but she had no choice now. Jason led her out of the living room, back into the hall and then through to the kitchen. In there, they found three boys standing by the counter, and also a girl standing next to them. "Is this your girlfriend?" one of them asked.

"This is Kate," Jason said, looking embarrassed at this comment.

"Nice to meet you," another boy said, who Kate presumed to be Shawn O'Neal, the host. "Don't let him give you too much of that stuff. Some girl already puked up half her guts in the bathroom earlier."

Kate was slightly alarmed at this statement and stared uneasily at her beer. "Uh, thanks for the tip," she said finally.

"Anyway, I'm Shawn," the boy who had just spoke said, "This is Joe, Sawyer and Ana."

Kate stared at the other two boys and the girl, who were all wearing mocking grins. Kate tried to avoid their gaze. "Hey Sawyer, wasn't Jack meant to be coming tonight?" Joe asked, and Kate's heart jumped. She stood frozen as Sawyer shook his head.

"Nah, well he said he would if he could, but he said he needed to do somethin' first, I dunno.."

"So he has a new girlfriend?" Ana inquired with a wicked grin.

Joe snorted. "As if, he never goes out with girls anymore. He's always too busy."

"Not true," Sawyer interrupted, and they all looked at him, even Kate. "He was talkin' to me about some girl he just met. How he really likes her, but can't go out with her or somethin'. I dunno if he's lyin' or what, I mean it wouldn't be the first time.."

"Like that time he said he was goin' back out with Sarah but it turned out she was already with someone else," Joe chimed in, and they all laughed.

"Enough about Jack," Sawyer said, sounding irritated, "When's that Shannon chick getting here?"

At this, Kate's heart immidiately sank. Shannon? As in Shannon Rutherford, one of the most annoying girls Kate had ever come across? She was coming? To this party? Tonight?

"Shannon's coming? Shannon Rutherford?" she blurted out, unable to stop herself.

"Joe has the hots for her," Sawyer explained, "Even though she's only seventeen, and he knows it."

"Who cares," Joe said distractedly, "I mean uh, y'know.."

"Shut up, Joe," Ana groaned, "But yeah, Shannon Rutherford, the bimbo you love to hate."

Kate couldn't help but smile at this. "Uh, Kate?"

She suddenly remembered Jason, who was standing there looking clueless. "Oh!" she squeaked, having forgotten he was there, "Yeah, uh, let's go.." she said, taking his hand and leading him out of the kitchen. She had wanted to stay and talk with Sawyer, Joe and Ana, who all seemed pretty decent, but she didn't want Jason to be angry with her.

"They're an annoying bunch, right?" Jason said, and Kate laughed.

"Nah, they're okay," she said truthfully smiling, "Can we sit down?"

"Yeah, sure," Jason said, and they found a place to sit that was out of the way of all the loud music and people dancing. "Look, Kate, the reason I invited you is because I really do like you, and I don't know how you feel about me, but I like to hope that you like me too. So do you?"

"Uh.." Kate didn't like being put on the spot like this. She couldn't exactly tell him that she didn't like him, could she?

"Hey, I'm sorry," Jason said, looking embarrassed.

"No, it's okay, I just.."

Then he kissed her. It felt nice, to be kissed by someone new. Kate kissed him back and then they pulled apart, both wearing smiles.

"That was, nice.." Kate breathed, starting to wonder if she really did like Jason afterall.

Jason grinned, "I do try," he said, and they both laughed.

"Look, I.."

"Hey, everybody!"

Kate stopped in mid sentence to look up and see what was going on.

"Shannon's here!"