a/n- Hello? Anyone still following me? So… I am so so so sorry about my lousy writing skills! I know I should have updated ages ago and I have just been so busy. School has got me on a short leash with exams and end of year. But soon I am having a 2 month break so yay for writing! So I hope this fixes your fanfiction cravings or a little while until I can get another chapter up. ENJOY!
Summary- Edward Cullen belongs to no one. Edward Cullen will never commit to anyone. Edward Cullen is a 'no strings attached' kind of guy. Well at least that's what he thought until Bella Swan came along. Bella Swan was looking for nothing, but got everything. What happens when two polar opposites attract?
Chapter Five: New Beginnings
BPOV
There were times in life when the most discreet things were the things that stood out, that made you rethink your sole purpose in life. What was my sole purpose in life? I was a bitch and I could acknowledge that fact, I had my reasons, my excuses. Didn't I?
Lately I had been questioning everything, second-guessing all the things I did. I had changed so much that I hardly recognized myself anymore. Reality had hit me like a slap across the face the night that Edward had told it to me straight. No one ever did that in fear of offending me, because I was 'the girl whose mom died or sometimes they were just plain scared of me.
Today I was to join the community of Forks High School. I was used to the constant change in my life, the new 'friends,' new counselors and new surroundings. I knew I would be faced with the dilemma of being the new kid at a school of only four hundred students and from what I heard the school's rumor mill was in full swing.
I shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat of the police cruiser, anticipating my arrival in the school parking lot.
I gestured outside the school gates when we reached them, "Just here's okay, I don't mind a quick walk in the morning." I smiled weakly at Charlie. I wanted to blend in and that definitely wasn't going to happen if I turned up in the Chief of Police's car. Charlie pulled over and looked straight ahead: eye contact wasn't really a big thing in our family.
"I thought I might come in with you Bells. You know, to show you where to go and help you set up." He looked at me tentatively, an unknown question in his eyes, as he scratched his neck uncomfortably.
"That's alright. I'm sure they have one of those buddy systems where someone from the student body will show me around." I pulled on the handle of the car door, wanting to get out before any more awkward conversation could be made.
"I guess I'll see you tonight," I waved quickly and shut the door before I could hear Charlie's response. I knew I was being selfish and probably unpleasant to be around, but I had my way of dealing with things and this was it.
I pulled my black hoodie over my head as light drops of rain began falling on my hair. My nervous footsteps kicked up puddles on the ground that lay at random intervals. Stopping as I came up to the entrance gate of the school, I took a deep breath and looked up.
As I dragged my body up the front pathway an icy cold hand, resembling the weather, grasped my arm and I spun around, shocked at my first interaction with someone at Forks High School. I turned around to see Alice looking at me directly before suddenly she was dragging me behind a school building.
"Alice?"
I was immensely surprised to see her, especially after how I had acted at the party.
"Bella, I needed to talk to you about-" Alice didn't finish talking before I cut her off.
"Alice, I didn't think you would want to talk to me."
"Bella, let me finish. I wanted to talk to you about the party. I realize that something has happened to you. 'You're' hurting and I can see that."
"How could you know that? What if this is just who I am?" I knew she was only trying to help but my defenses always went up when even the slightest subject of my mom was brought up.
"I know because I know someone whose been through something and it changed them completely too." She looked saddened by the memory.
"I know how I acted the other night was wrong and I was fucking stupid for saying the things I did. It's just I'm sick of being looked at like the 'freak'. I know I have no excuses that could suffice for what I did, and I've been through shit that has fucked me up, but I am truly sorry."
I knew my lame apology was delivered at the wrong person. I should have been saying this to Edward and I knew Alice thought the same thing, but I doubted Edward would even listen to me now.
"Bella, you made a bad first impression for yourself at the party, but I'm not one to judge. I really like you and I think that over time all will be forgiven." I scoffed at Alice's hopefulness.
"Edward looked like he was about to throttle me the other night. I doubt he's going to forgive me." Alice looked disappointed at my pessimism.
"Time heals all wounds and Edward's one to know that." She didn't care to elaborate on that, so I left the subject alone because it seemed touchy. Alice also seemed to be hinting discreetly that I wouldn't always feel so hurt and alone.
"Alice, I really am sorry about what I did." She nodded in understanding, stepping forward and wrapping her arms around me. I wasn't used to all this friendly deep and meaningful crap, but I sucked it up and hugged her back.
"I got to go, classes started five minutes ago." She smirked at me.
"Shit!" I hissed. I didn't want to make another bad impression for myself; I'd had enough of those for one week. Alice turned and walked away, humming an unknown tune as she did.
"You might also want to start by apologizing to Edward." She yelled back at me. I looked up from fumbling with my book bag, looking for my timetable. "Also, you have Biology in room 57 first up." How did she know what?
I shoved my shit back into the bag and ran, not knowing where the fuck I was going.
There were still kids in hallways talking and just standing around. I was confused by the nonchalant behavior of the students even though the bell had gone… I looked down at my watch… seven minutes ago. Seeing a room marked with the number 53, I continued down the hall I eventually found room 57.
I walked in to find a completely free table, which I decided to take, after giving my details to the teacher. I unpacked my Biology books and shoved a exercise book in front of me, ready to take notes.
As the teacher began to introduce the new topic of Meiosis and Mitosis to the class, the door opened and in walked Edward Cullen. Sweet baby Jesus!
EPOV
New week, new day and a new victim for the students to vulture off. Bella Swan. I really wasn't interested, to say the least. There were bets, rumors and various other forms of gossip going around with everyone's assumptions about the Chiefs' daughter. Everyone was blatantly oblivious to the fact that she was a complete bitch. She was so stuck up that she believed everyone was below her.
I picked up my shoulder bag off the leather seat the Volvo, slinging it into its rightful place. The books jolted to the bottom of the sack and I did up the buckle, ready to enter the jail some people like to call school. Jasper joined me, syncing his steps with mine so that every step the same.
"Rough night?" He asked, smirking at his 'hilarious' comment.
"More like rough life." I grimaced at the loud noises emitting from the childish behavior of the kids at this school.
And no I wasn't pulling a Bella Swan. I don't think I am above these morons, but some of them are just that- morons. For example, Mike Newton, who is standing over by the vending machine, thinks it's a good idea to shake up a can of coke and then give it to his friend Tyler. Yet he's that air headed that he doesn't realize Tyler has done the exact same thing. And then we end up with two immature fuckheads going to the nurse's office to get clothes from the lost property box.
"What class do you have first up?" Jasper questioned me, while he took out his timetable so we could compare.
"Bio." Jasper nodded, accepting the fact that we couldn't fuck around together in first period, torturing the unfortunate teacher whose class we got placed in. Last year in English, Ms. Simmons complained to the principal about our disruptive and outrageous behavior. Jasper got removed from the class and both of us had to do extra study in our own'time.
Jasper shoved his timetable into his back pocket and spat the gum he had previously been chewing into the bushes that lined the walkway. He instantly got a stern look from Mr. Garter, warning Jasper that his patience was running low with the two of us. I continued walking as Jasper turned around to face Mr. Garter, putting his hands in the air as if to say 'I didn't do it' and walked backward slowly with a grin on his face.
The bell rang to signify first period and everyone shuffled slowly to their respective rooms. I held my hand up and ran my eyes over the list that indicated which room I was supposed to be in and when.
Jasper had already disappeared so I decided to actually turn up to get my name ticked off for once. There's a first for everything. The door to room 57 was already closed by the time I got there, my slow pace usually got my ass in detention. I pushed down on the silver handle and watched as all eyes in the room turned towards me, surprised at my guest appearance.
But only one pair of eyes caught my attention; wide, melted chocolate colored eyes, filled with uppity and evil They were the Bella Swan eyes. And she was sitting in my seat. This was the only class where I could sit alone and not have to listen to some whiny partner telling me measurements or what step to do next.
But now, not only did I have a partner, but of all people it was Bella fucking Swan.
I walked over to the desk, taking each hesitant step one at a time. Her face was covered by a wall of brown hair that reached down to the middle of her back. I grabbed my books out of my bag and slammed them down onto the desk, waiting for some sort of movement from my new partner. She didn't even flinch, not one muscle moved from what I could see.
I sat down and tried to make my presence known again by clearing my throat. She looked up and as soon as our eyes made contact, she looked away, avoiding any sort of acknowledgment.
I looked away too, not really caring if she wanted to converse or not.
"Ed-Edward... listen…" Bella stuttered and I looked over at her. She was always so bold with what she said and never made a slip of the tongue, but it seemed as if all people stumble on words sometimes.
"Edward, I'm sorry for judging you at the party. I'm just not used to new people and all of this." She indicated what she meant by waving her finger around the classroom. "And I know that's not a good excuse but I'm genuinely sorry."
I put my face in my hands, resting my elbows on the desk. She was apologizing: that was a start.
"If there's anything I can do to make up for it…" I didn't let her finish her sentence.
"Bella, I'm glad you realized you were a bitch at my party, but I don't want any favors from you. I understand you're sorry." I left it at that, not wanting to sound like I cared too much. She stared blatantly at me, waiting for me to continue with something else. She reluctantly nodded her head in agreement and stared up at the board, watching the teacher scribble today's work that was to be completed in class or at home if we did not finish it.
The rest of the class was spent in uncomfortable silence… We did not speak at all due to the hurried writing of Bella's note-taking into her exercise book.
As soon as the bell rang I rushed out of class, needing some fresh air and a smoke. Smoking wasn't permitted on school property or anywhere for that matter for someone of my age, but aren't rules made to be broken?
I walked to the back of the bleachers where a little cubby resided where Jazz and I sometimes met after classes to do things the school wouldn't condone on their property. Smoking, drinking: you name it, we probably did it.
It was unoccupied and a freshly butted out cigarette indicated Jasper's recent activity. I pulled out my box of cigarettes and lit one, taking a long drag that released all of my tension from the day. I sat down on the old milk crate and let my mind be free of everything for just a few minutes. It was hard, all I could think about was Bella. The thing was that what she had said at the party had hurt, me and that was the thing- people and everything people said to me it never affected me, but her words had… Bella had. I cared about her and what she thought, but why? She meant nothing to me, she was no one.
Alice had told me at some point during the night, after the fact, that Bella and I were more alike than we thought. I didn't know what she meant at the time and I still don't, but she obviously knew something I didn't. Alice had said that 'shit has happened to Bella'. I looked down where a scar ran along my forearm and spoke aloud to no one, "Shit has happened to me too."
a/n- D: What did you think? So there is a dark side to both Edward and Bella that we don't really know about. Both their stories about their pasts will develop over forthcoming chapters. Again I am sorry about my slow updates and I can't promise you anything about when the next chapter will be up but I hope I still have some of my followers and they are still enjoying this. Tell me your thoughts about the chapter or about life in general by hitting the review button! (: