Theory 5
Bella left Edward for Jacob and made readers who don't like Jacob around the world cry for at least an hour. Bella never becomes a vampire and Edward goes into a deep depression. Alice sees Bella coming back, so Edward gets all excited and awaits her return. Embry & Quil lose a bet to Sam & must shave their hair so that they are bald wolves. So then, Rosalie is walking & not paying attention. She looks over a bridge nearby when Mike Newton comes up behind her and pushes her…because he was feeling evil that day. She dies instantly. Charlie is so overwhelmed with happiness that Bella chose Jacob. So much happiness that he explodes. And then Jacob pisses Bella off and she leaves him for Edward, which made Edward lovers and haters the world over cry more. One night, Jacob comes to the Cullen house and somehow steals Bella & takes her back to La Push where she stayed prisoner forever and ever until she died.