Andrew Yablonski: The Unwanted One Chapter 6, a three rivers fanfic

1992

Uncle Mike's offer still ran through Andrew's mind.

"You can help me, kid." Uncle Mike's raspy voice entered Andrew's consciousness again and all else disappeared, including Rena talking beside the sixteen-year old. "I realize now that you're the only one I got, and you to me. You're going to belong, Andrew, and I promise I'll never hurt you again."

"Andrew?" Rena's voice broke Andrew's thoughts. His eyes popped open to find Rena gazing at him with fear in her eyes.

"You're doing it again, aren't you?" Rena tried to clutch Andrew's hand but he pulled away. "It's as if everything has disappeared, Andrew, when I talk to you." Andrew's eyes shied away from Rena's own. "Ever since I wanted to talk to you about..."

"The abuse?" he whispered. It was then that he met Rena's eyes. Red-rimmed eyes met Andrew's dry. He licked his lips, and let out a raspy laugh. "How long have you known?"

"Long enough." Rena whispered. As if she had never met him before, she stated calmly, "You need help."

Rena is going to be a great cop one day. At the thought, Andrew's hint of a smile vanished. Cops were now his enemies. If he was going to be a burglar and working for Uncle Mike with Casper and Paul, no one could be trusted. Andrew looked at Rena. Her short brown hair that had captivated her throughout their childhood was now shoulder-length. The breeze made it blow in the wind softly, and Andrew wondered how long he had felt these feelings for his only friend.

A single tear traveled down her cheek and Andrew cupped it in his hand before it fell. There was pain evident in her eyes and it was not for the first time that Andrew wished he could take the pain away.

"I'm helping Uncle Mike with his business."

Rena didn't say anything as he walked away from her.

"You're free from me now, Rena."

She didn't try to stop him.

Andrew walked away.

The next day, Rena came up to him in the hallway. She stood beside him as his back pressed against the wall. Her voice didn't match her eyes, which looked like they were very far away.

"You're on your own now, Andrew. Fend for yourself."

Andrew didn't say anything as she walked away.

The next moment after that, Andrew got into a fight with bullies. He broke one kid's arm. Andrew was suspended from school for two weeks.

"You ready, kid?"

Andrew nodded at the sound of Casper's brooding voice. Behind him, he heard Paul snicker as Casper shared a quiet joke. Andrew ignored them as he continued to pick the locks. The only compliment Uncle Mike gave him when the three returned from robbing houses were Andrew's hands. "He's a very talented boy," Uncle Mike had said. "He has good hands."

Andrew snuck in. It was now 1993. Andrew was seventeen.

Instead of being an abused and forgotten youth, Andrew was a burglar. A criminal. It felt good, being a burglar, Andrew thought to himself as he cautiously drew the flashlight out of his pocket and clicked it on. He didn't give a damn about the money. Uncle Mike, Casper, and Paul grinned with glee at the sight of the valuables he would rob from the houses. Andrew robbed people to forget. It was a release, better than anything Andrew had experienced before. For the first time, even around Rena, Andrew felt safe. He felt alive and was doing something. He was doing something to forget the anger and sadness whenever Andrew looked at him, and at his life. But deep down inside him, he knew it was wrong.

A sudden noise caused him to turn around.

There was a man in front of him. He was only clad in his pajamas, and in his shaking hands, pointed at Andrew's chest, was a gun. Despite being armed, the man glanced nervously at Andrew's own gun and swallowed.

Andrew would have laughed if the scene wasn't so serious. But the laughter died in his throat.

"Why are you doing this?" the man asked, staring at his intruder. The gun was still pointed at Andrew's chest. "Who are you?" he asked.

Andrew didn't respond at first. He then clicked the trigger on his own gun, ignoring the tremors that shook his hands. "If you leave me alone, no one will get hurt." He took a breath. Andrew's heart raced. "Just...let me go."

"A boy like you should be-"

"Shut up!" Andrew yelled. He pointed the gun at the man's head. "Let me go," he repeated firmly.

The man started to tremble but his voice was still strong. "Why?"

Something inside Andrew flared, flickered, and then died.

"Why the hell do you care?" Andrew hoarsely demanded. The emotions – the ones that had followed him through childhood – were threatening to overwhelm him once again.

Again.

Andrew barely heard the man ask the question again.

Yes, why?

"I'm doing this because…I have to."

"Have to?" the man repeated. "You don't have to do anything, boy." Now the man seemed to drop his guard.

It took a while for Andrew to answer. "I do it, because…I have to feel alive. I want to feel alive. I…" He faltered for a second. "I…ever since I began doing this, I started to feel safe. I was… doing something. Something to forget the anger and sadness whenever I looked at him, and at my life. But I knew it was wrong, and I felt afraid all the time, and it was as if I was wrong. I would have killed myself if I didn't do the things I did to…"

"To what?"

"To forget." Andrew finished.

I want this to end, he thought. I don't care…I don't care if I go to prison. I just want this to end.

"My name is Andrew."

The voice that vibrated from Andrew's mouth did not belong to him. It ends here… The man nodded to the seventeen-year old boy. Uncle Mike will hurt me again, and I'll continue to lie to myself….

Rena.

At the last thought, Andrew dropped his gun.

"You know what, Andrew, you can hear the wake up call or walk away."

There seemed to be something in the tall seventeen year old boy with blue eyes and dark brown bangs that he had never felt before. The man nodded to him again.

And at that moment, a shot rang out.

Two shots.

Agonizing pain erupted from both his legs. Andrew thought he heard a scream that was not his own. He heard voices as the world stared to fade.

He blacked out, falling in his own blood.

Andrew Yablonski was shot from behind by his partners-in-crime, Casper and Paul. Then they ran away.

As monitors beeped all around him, and as the pounding in his head nauseated his whole body, and as a voice shouted above all the noise, Andrew thought of Rena.

Her smile and the nose that he loved so much.

"Rena…"

He blacked out.

Somewhere I Belong – Linkin Park

When this began
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me.
I was confused
And I let it all out to find
That I'm not the only person with these things in mind
Inside of me.
But all that they can see the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel.
Nothing to lose
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own.

I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real.
I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long.
Erase all the pain till it's gone.
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real.
I wanna find something I've wanted all along.
Somewhere I belong.

And I've got nothing to say
I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face.
I was confused
Looking everywhere only to find
That it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind.
So what am I?
What do I have but negativity
'Cause I can't justify the way, everyone is looking at me.
Nothing to lose
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own.

I will never know myself until I do this on my own.
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed.
I will never be anything till I break away from me.
I will break away, I'll find myself today.

I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong.
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong.
Somewhere I belong.