A/N: It has taken a long time to update – again. Sorry. That's the word I'll repeat. Thank you for those who read and reviewed the latest chapter. It's always really nice to get some support. Lily. Thank you again. If I ever get this story completed it's because of your help and support. Mistakes are all mine. I own nothing.
6. Healing Scars
March, 1990. New York City, at the police academy.
There was an amused smile on Mac Taylor's face as he stood at the corner of the park area watching the woman. She carried a moving box out of the dormitory and stepped down the stairs. She stopped where the stairs ended and grimaced. Clearly, the box was heavy for she lowered the box on the frozen ground. He checked the time on his watch and smirked. She just couldn't wait for him even though they had agreed that he would help her to move into a studio in the new dormitory. The months they had known each other had passed quickly. He had moved out of the dormitory into the city once he got a job after graduation. And yes, there had been the first date, he smiled. He couldn't believe how everything had changed. He tucked his palms into the pockets of his jacket as the chilly wind whirled around the area. He headed across the park toward his girlfriend. It was an early Saturday morning, and the sky was heavy with a blanket of clouds, and the air was crispy with a cold breath of air. They headed for spring, but he guessed they would face a few storms before the calmness.
xxx
"I think we agreed something," Mac said as he met Stella at the end of the stairs. He took a moving box from her and gave her a stern look, but a smile curved his lips.
"Oh, hi." She flashed a wide smile and blushed a bit. "I just thought I that I'd spare you."
Spare me? He thought. She was the one who had had rough months of studying and practicing. It should have been enough to cope with but she still got nightmares, though they had decreased since she had gone into therapy. She had told him that she needed to solve some things from her past, but that was all he knew. She seemed to do okay, was probably the best cadet in her class: he wasn't so worried about her becoming a police officer though his troubles involved her being hurt in the line of duty. Sometimes at nights when he was awake and watched her restless sleeping, he knew her journey had just begun. Whatever it was, he hoped she would share her troubles with him. He had learnt during the months they had dated that she was used to doing everything alone. Hopefully, she would understand soon that she wasn't alone anymore.
He nodded. "But I'm here, Stell. Show me the way."
They started to carry the moving boxes in comfortable silence toward the second dormitory in line. Sometimes he smirked at her, making jokes. It didn't take long as they carried all her items into her new home.
"Nice flat." Mac looked around the room while they sat on the floor and enjoyed coffee.
"It's a mess." Stella frowned looking at the moving boxes on the floor. It was going to take some time to put everything in order though she didn't have much stuff. Mac tasted his coffee, and it sure was good. He was used to drinking black coffee, but this time the flavor was very sweet.
"What you put in here?" he asked keen to know. Stella smirked at him.
"It's a secret."
"You wanna share it?" Mac sipped again.
Stella laughed. "No." Her green eyes sparkled, but seeing him acting as he was hurt, she gave in. "Well, maybe someday."
"I'll take that as a yes." An amused smile appeared on his face, and he rose up from the floor. "Thanks for the coffee."
She rose up from the floor herself too and took the cup from his hand, putting the cups into the sink in the kitchenette. Mac watched her as she turned around and made her way toward him.
Thanks for helping me." She kissed him and snaked her arms around his neck.
"My pleasure." He murmured against her hair and caressed her back. She's so slender, he thought. His fingers reached the nape of her neck, and he massaged the sore muscles at the base. She pressed her forehead against his shoulder surrendering to his touch.
"Oohh…" A weak moan escaped from her lips. The sound was shuddering, and the breath she took sent a sort of pleasure through him. Then, the thick silence fell around them as they stood in each other's arms.
"Mac?" she whispered as he pressed his lips against her neck.
"Yes?"
"Do you have plans tonight?" she asked breathlessly.
"Not right now…"
"Good..." Her fingers fumbled with the buttons of his shirt. "That's good."
xxx
"So, what are your plans tonight?" Stella stepped out from the shower and wrapped a towel around her. Her moist hair dripped water along her shoulders. Mac enjoyed the view resting on the bed.
"I'll meet my friend later on this evening."
"Have I met him?" She sat on the edge of the bed, thought a moment and looked at Mac. She rested her hand on his chest, her fingertips caressing the scar. She was lost in her thoughts. "Or her?"
"Jealous?" Mac grinned.
"No." She huffed and was about to leave, but Mac got a hold on her and pulled her next to him on the narrow bed.
"Not even a bit?" he teased her, tickling her.
"No!" She laughed and tried to wiggle out from his embrace. "Mac, don't!"
He continued her gentle torture so long as she admitted she was jealous – at least a bit. Of course, he knew how deeply her feelings were, but as coy as she sometimes was, it felt good to hear her admitting something so primitive.
"God, Mac!" Stella rested beside the widely grinning man. "You are such a dork."
"Hah, but I'm your dork." He kissed her gently and turned on his side.
"Fine, fine." She couldn't help but smile at his smugness. "Now that I have admitted that I'm a jealous type of woman, you can tell me about your friend."
"Jace is my army pal. You probably saw him in the picture I had on the wall." He reminded her. "He's a marine from Chicago, the—"
"The windy city, I know," Stella continued and said thoughtfully. "I've never visited the city."
"I'll take you there someday."
"Really?" she asked. "To see what?"
"Well, my parents live there," Mac replied watching her reaction. "I'd like you to meet them."
Stella swallowed nervously. She hadn't seen any parents of her dates. No man would take a girlfriend to home if he wasn't serious about her, she realized.
"That— That would be nice," she said honestly, meeting his gaze. "Someday."
"That's a deal, but in case you don't have anything to do tonight…" Mac looked at the moving boxes and grinned. "Well, I'm meeting my friend in a bar. We haven't seen each other for a while. Join us, if you get tired of unpacking. "
"In what bar?" Stella asked right away. "Unpacking can wait."
xxx
The man smoked in front of the bar. He smoked when he was nervous. He tossed the butt away as he noticed a couple approaching him. His friend had called him and confirmed their meeting, and before they ended the call his friend mentioned that his girlfriend would come along as well. He coughed and decided to stop smoking, but he knew the reality of quitting. He had tried but always failed. He was a loser, or that was how his old man had thought about him – even in his sick bed – and he had started to believe in that himself. The poor old bastard had lost his battle with cancer. The only thing of his he had been proud of him was the army career he gained. It wasn't much considering the amount of troubles he coped with in his life but at least he had done everything for his country. It was half because of how impulsive and cold minded he had been and agreed to accomplish every assigned mission. He hadn't cared about his life, and that's why he ended up behind the enemy line and wounded badly. Lying on the ground, blood seeping through his clothes, he had stared at the night sky full of stars and listened to the voices of the battle. He had thought that that was it, that it was his time. But somewhere appeared his saviors. Mac Taylor was one of them; the other two had died saving his life. The dangerous journey behind the enemy line hadn't left Mac unwounded. Still, he wouldn't be here without Mac, the man who now walked with a saucy looking lady toward him. The scars still ached but he didn't care about the pain. It reminded him about the time when he mattered something.
He nodded at Mac but his gaze lingered a long time on the woman beside the dark haired marine.
"Jace!" He heard Mac's voice and forced himself not to stare at the curly haired woman. Her eyes shone and her cheeks were red because of the coldness. She smiled beautifully.
"Mac!" He looked at him. "Long time no see. How are you?" He asked, shaking his commander's hand.
"Good. I'm good." Mac smiled and introduced Stella to his friend.
"Nice to meet you." Stella said and studied the man's face. Above the left eyebrow was a faint scar. She shared the same eye color with the man. His chopped army styled hair was sand brown and when he smiled he looked like a boy who had been caught doing bad things. She didn't know yet what to think about him. It took time for her to trust people.
"I'm Jace." He replied with a smirk. "Good to see Mac's woman."
Stella hemmed at his words.
"Why don't we continue inside the bar, so we don't freeze to death?" Mac guided them inside the crowded bar.
xxx
Stella really enjoyed her time with the marines. Mac seemed to be a very good friend with Jace. They shared more than bond of the friendship. She thought it was because of Mac saving his life. She couldn't imagine how awful it all must have been. She listened to the men as they recalled the time when they were in the field hospital. During the conversation she found out that Mac had been wounded as well. The scar, she thought and shivered. The men were in a deep conversation, but that didn't bother her. She excused herself and made her way into the ladies' room.
xxx
"So where did you two meet?" Jace asked, after he saw Stella disappearing into the ladies' room back in the bar.
"It's a long story." Mac drank a few sips of his beer, leaning back in his seat. The bar was crowded, but they were lucky to find empty seats at the back of the bar.
"She seems to be a nice girl, Mackie."
"Stop calling me that." Mac laughed. Jace laughed, too.
"So, tell me. Where did you find such a catch?"
"Believe me or not but we kind of met accidentally." Mac remembered the certain evening in the library. "In the library of the police academy."
"She's a cop?" Jace blurted as if he couldn't believe what the other man said.
"Not yet. But will be." Mac corrected and wondered at his reaction. "Is that hard to believe?"
Jace ordered more beers before replying. He shrugged his shoulders. "No, it's just that… She… Well… She doesn't look like a cop."
"She's the best in her class." Mac said.
Jace smiled differently. "Bet she is."
Mac wished they could drop the subject. "So, do you have anything going on?"
Jace smirked. "There are ladies…"
"There are ladies… "Mac imitated. He knew exactly what he meant. He wasn't the type of man who would settle down with any woman.
You know, Jace." Mac started and took a sip of his fresh poured beer. "You should fall in love. That changes a man."
"Are you in love, then?" Jace inquired seriously.
Mac nodded and witnessed Stella making her way toward their seats. "Believe me or not, but when you find the right one…" He felt how the slight blush rose on his cheeks. Thank God it was dim in that bar. There was something in Stella that made his heart beat like a jungle drum. She was an attractive woman who definitely had her own will. Maybe it was the thing he felt drawn to. Maybe it was her eyes. Maybe it was the moment when she had reached the book just before him. Maybe it was how she had been in her barest state of mind.
Maybe it all was meant to be.
"I think I am." Mac directed his gaze to Stella. Their conversation died when Stella reached the men.
"You know, I think I'll head back to my apartment." Stella said, putting on her jacket, and smiled in apology. There was so much to do; now that she finally had her own room.
"I'll walk you home." Mac put money on the table.
"Mac, you don't have to." Stella smiled.
"Yeah, the evening is still young." Jace tried, watching his friend.
"I'm good." Mac replied. He had drunk enough beers tonight, and so had his friend, but he wouldn't leave the bar yet. "Let's catch up again, soldier."
"That's a promise, lieutenant?
"Of course. Semper fi." Mac promised. "I'll call you. Take it easy."
Stella looked questioningly at the men.
"It's Latin and means always faithful. It's our motto." Jace lifted his beer. "Cheers!"
xxx
It didn't snow after all. The pale moon lightened the dark night as the couple sat on the cold cement stairs. It was a chilly night, though Mac felt the warmth of Stella's body. She kept staring at her hands which rested on her lap. He had no idea why she guided them to that place, where they were and what they waited for. Finally, she lifted her gaze. Her eyes were filled with tears.
"I used to live there," Stella said quietly. Her words were full of anger. She stared at the building across the street. Mac had seen the building sometimes as he had driven past it but never paid much attention to it. He had never thought about what kind of life the building held inside.
"I'm sorry, I don't know the place." Mac confessed.
"It's an orphanage." Stella's lower lip trembled.
Mac thought about his life, how much he appreciated his childhood and parents. Her past was different, so raw, and he had been blessed with a family and a home. He couldn't imagine the pain of losing a beloved one and living a life without the people who mattered the most. He had never felt so much pain for someone. "I'm sorry."
She nodded, not saying a word. She took a sharp intake of breath and turned to look at him and their gazes met.
"I have seen…"
Nightmares?
"Nightmares." She continued. "I don't know why. Guess you know already. I mean… You woke me up when I fell asleep on you couch. I have seen them other times, too."
"That's why you go for the therapy?" Mac guessed.
Stella nodded.
He reached for her hand, giving her the time she needed. When she spoke, her voice was small.
"I don't remember..."
"μητέρα." He recalled the word that troubled his mind. "What does that mean?" Mac asked.
She laughed, but tears kept falling. "It's Greek and means mother."
"I called after her when the car…" She shook her head in agony. She heard the sound of the waves. She heard the silence.
"I called after my mother, but I don't remember anything." She needed to say the reality that had been haunting her. "I can't remember my mother."
Mac breathed the cold air of the night. The sound of the cars distracted him and he realized that she must be frozen. He stood up, offering his hand to her. "You're cold."
"I don't mind."
"But I do."
His words affected her, and she smiled. They rose up and strolled along the street side by side, hand in hand. He didn't want to let her go. She peeked over her shoulder once before they turned around the corner.
"What happened to your father?" Mac asked.
Stella thought for a moment before answering. "I can't remember him either."
"Was he in the car?"
"I… I don't remember. I… I don't think he was." Stella closed her eyes and let Mac guide her. "I was so little when the accident happened. Or so I've been told."
When Mac looked at her a puzzled look on his face, Stella spoke. "The nuns told me so." Then she continued. "I remember hands pulling me out of the car, but I don't know who the person was. Somebody saved me and I don't know who…"
They walked along the street in silence. She stopped short, tugging his arm. He didn't go any further without her. There was a nervous laugh and she lowered her gaze: "This is absurd."
He tilted her head, lifting her chin so she met his gaze. "What is?"
"What I'm going to say." Tears glimmered in her eyes.
"Whatever makes you happy, Stell." His heart hammered in his chest as he didn't know what to expect.
Her breath caressed the side of his face. "I'm happy with you, Mac. I'm falling in love with you."
He turned his head, and it was just inches away from hers. He was relieved what she said about them. He felt the same way. He looked at her green eyes and whispered. "This is real, Stell." And his lips skimmed over hers. "We are real."
"Good." She smiled and continued her walking watching the man beside her. "Because I don't want to wake up from this amazing dream and face another nightmare."
TBC
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