Disclaimer: I only own Alexandria Noles (Alex) and a few other lesser characters. Any wrestlers mentioned do not belong to me (no matter how much I wish!!) the only belong to themselves.

The days seemed to never end, each running seamlessly into the next for Alex. She got very little sleep, but when she did close her eyes her dreams were always of him. His voice, his face, his smile. Everything she couldn't bear to think of when she was awake plagued her while she rested. She couldn't bring herself to sleep in the bed she had shared with him for the past year.

And there was this odd, haunting dream that also seemed to replay in her mind. She didn't understand it in the least, but as sleep deprived, and depressed, as she was, she did not feel like trying to figure it out. It was in the woods, almost like the property out behind Gilbert's house, but she couldn't be sure. And his voice was there as well... Like a beacon, trying to lead her somewhere. At first, Alex just brushed the dream aside, but after it seemed to repeat and repeat and repeat itself, it was a bit eerie.

Shannon had hardly left her side since the news had been broken, and when he wasn't there, Matt was. Neither of the men could really help her cope, as they were both dealing with the loss as well, but she wasn't able to function totally on her own. Taking care of Destiny was beyond hard for all three, but between them all, it was managable.

Alex sat on the couch and stared out into the front yard, which was still scattered with remnants of him. She knew that she should have been helping Matt and Gilbert with the funeral plans, but she broke down every time she even thought about it. The plans were coming to an end, the funeral coming too fast for any of their likings, but what could they do? And then the day after, there was a meeting with Jeff's lawyer.

And as she had since she recieved the call, Alex began to cry and curse Jeff in her mind.

'Damn it Jeff, why? Why did you have to leave us? Didn't you know we still needed you so much? All of us!' Suddenly, the blame changed in her mind, once again.

'God, how could you hurt us like this? How could you take him from me?'

How many times had she expressed her anger, doubtfulness, and rage towards God was incomprehensible. Shannon heard most of it that was voiced, and all he could do was nod and try to not cry. Matt, on the other hand, would just stand from where he was sitting with Alex and walk off, refusing to listen to her rants on that subject. He cared about her, but it was just not a place he wanted to go, at least not yet.

Shannon walked into the living room with a cup of coffee for Alex,to find her staring blankly into space. He figured he knew what she was thinking, and made his way to sit next to her.

"Hey, thought you might like this." He handed off the cup when she reached for it, only to place it on the table. Her face turned towards him, just looking. He began to feel as though he should do or say something, the silence was starting to drive him crazy, but she took care of it, speaking.

"Shan, hold me, please?" It came out as a whisper, barely audible, but Shannon nodded as he leaned back on the couch and allowed Alex to crawl up to him. Alex closed her eyes as more tears slipped by her lashes. She could just pretend, just imagine, that it was Jeff. If she closed her eyes, and really tried... The guilt that she felt from the act only added to the tears, but it was not greater than the need to be held.

A/N: Short, but I just wanted it to end there. Thanks so much to my reviewers!! I kept forgetting to add that to the end here! So thanks so much to: Cara Mascara, Inday, KaraAlissa! And as always, please review for me! Em.