A/N: Srry I havent been posting lately, I've been crying due to loss of degrassi episodes. but since skool starts tomorrow, my friends will help me get over the loss!
Chapter 6
My Body Is Cage, So Of Course You Can't Enter
I woke up startled as the book, hit the desk. I looked up at the teacher, shocked.
"Ms. Giovanni, class is over." She said walking to her desk. I looked at my clothes. The same thing I wore when Fitz got arrested. I rolled my eyes and dropped my head on the desk. 'You're fucking kidding me. All of that was a dream!' I thought to myself standing. I walked out of the classroom and put a hand to my head. 'I must've zoned out from the pressure and during class…but then that means I never told Eli…' I thought. Then again, half the things I said weren't true. Yes, I did get shot, and yes, I did move to Brooklyn for a while. NOT Bedstuy, a different part. But I didn't rob anybody, that's not the reason I went to juvie. The reason is-
"Hey, are you okay?" I heard Eli say from behind me, a hand going to my shoulder, ruining my train of thought. I jumped, turning to him and sighing.
"Don't do that." I strained out, continuing to walk.
"Sorry. But when Fitz got arrested, you looked really pissed when we got back." He said and I shook my head barely remembering what happened.
"Don't worry, I'm fine. I just…got a lot going on." I said trying to avoid the rest of the questions he threw at me. I couldn't help but finally crack at him yelling "ELI! Can you just stop, for like a second! I don't need your bombarding questions right now!" He stared at me in shock and I turned to look at the few people who saw that. I shook my head and walked away, right out the school doors. I couldn't deal with anybody right now. I had walked all the way home, and had fell asleep right on the couch. A half an hour later, I woke up with Eli staring at me. I screamed and sat up quickly, as he backed up from my scream.
"Dude! Why are you staring me down?" I asked cautiously.
"You were sweating and mumbling something. I couldn't hear you so I got closer." He replied with a shrug. I rolled my eyes and stood up. He sat down next to me and looked at me. I looked back and said "What?"
"You wanna tell me something?" he asked. It wasn't really in the form of a question, more of a statement.
"Look, I know Fitz is a bad guy, but you shouldn't mess with him. It's not gonna be good when someone gets hurt." I said in a serious tone. His face turned grim and I hopped he wouldn't spaz out or something.
"Whatever he gets, he deserves. But maybe you are right."
"So you won't mess with him?"
"I didn't say that. I won't mess with him for a while, but only because you and Clare told me to." He answered standing up. I watched as he walked up to his room, slammed the door and started blasting Dead Hand loudly. I sighed and shook my head.
The next day, me and Eli walked up to Adam's locker. Adam had to take remedial gym, or some crap like that. Seven words: never gonna help anyone out in life.
"So how's the man in the mirror? Working on trying to change his ways?" Eli asked walking up behind him. Adam turned around and put on a worried look.
"What?" he asked closing his locker.
"Michael Jackson?" Adam rolled his eyes. "Never mind. So, how's the life of recreational arts?" Eli asked.
"Ballroom dancing." Adam replied. I let out chuckle then said "Excuse me, but ballroom dancing? That's torture."
"Oh boy." Eli said looking behind Adam.
"It's not that bad, I get to dance with cute girls-"
"No, I mean oh boy." Eli referred to Clare walking over to us. His ears started to turn red and I bit my lip to keep from giggling.
"Edited your homework. I don't approve of this Clare Edwin character." She said handing it to him. Eli said a big word that I didn't understand and Clare replied with "She's a floosy. Fix it." She shoved it in his hand and walked away, turning back to smile.
"Not even a hello. You're rubbing off on her." I said smirking.
"You two give me the runs." Adam said.
"To me it's entertaining. So, have fun dancing with-wait are there any cute girls in remedial gym?" Eli asked. 'Guys.' I thought rolling my eyes.
"There's Bianca." Adam said. We both gave him a look. "You gotta admit she's pretty hot."
"Yea in a hit and run SUV kind of way." Eli said.
"Plus, she's bad news dude. You wouldn't believe some of the things she does." I commented before walking away while saying "Think about it." I stopped in the middle of the hall and realized something. I ran back to Eli and quickly asked "Dude, my appointment." His eyes went wide in shock and he said "What time is it?" I looked at my wrist and remembered I didn't have a watch.
"I don't know!" I said.
"What are you guys talking about?" Adam asked. I paused to think of an excuse.
"Dentist appointment. I have it early in the morning." I quickly said as Eli handed me the keys to Morty. I stared in shock as he said "Hurry and I better not find a scratch on Morty." I nodded as I ran to the school parking lot. I hopped in the driver's seat and started the ignition. I drove off to the hospital, hoping that they wouldn't mind I was late. Obviously they didn't because I went right in to . He smiled at me and said "Ahh, you made it. I thought you would've forgot."
"How could I ever?" I said smiling, sitting in the infamous arm chair.
"First we'll take a quick blood test." He said, an injecting needle in his hand. I gulped as the needle collided with my arm and I tried not to freak out. Me and needles, bad relationship. I tried a fashion design class once and the machines needle went right through my finger. Yeah it hurt. Never used a sewing machine again. After he was done, he took the needle part off and put my blood in a tube. I felt like a test dummy for science class.
"Before I go test this, did you have anything after you ate dinner yesterday?" he asked. I shook my head and he smiled before putting a bandage around my arm and walking towards the door.
"We'll go test to see how high your blood sugar is." He said before walking out. I laid back in the chair and felt my phone go off. I slipped it out of my pocket and noticed it was a call from Eli.
"Hello?" I answered and he whispered "Hey, how's it going?"
"Besides the fact I got a needle through my arm? Not that bad!" I answered. "Why are you whispering?"
"I'm in the bathroom trying not to get caught. What's the doctor doing now?" he asked, his voice still low.
"He went to go find out how high my blood sugar is. He'll be back in a while." I answered, nails tapping on the arm chair.
"Well, good luck Ghost. I gotta go before the teacher gets suspicious." He said. I sighed sadly. I was all alone in a doctor's office. It was going to be very boring.
"Yeah, ok. Talk to you later. Bye." I said and hung up the phone. I sighed as I waited for Dr. Lasenbyrg to come back. After about 10 more minutes, the door opened and in walked Dr. Lasenbyrg with a file with my name on it. I felt my heart beat get louder as he started speaking.
"We have the results right here, Ms. Giovanni." He said and I nodded, my hands starting to shake. He opened the file and looked closely to the file.
"It seems that you have the blood sugar of 128 milligrams per dekaliter. It's right above the line of having prediabetes. I shut my eyes and let my head hit the chair. I opened my eyes and asked "So, what, do I have diabetes or prediabetes?"
"Well, we're not exactly sure until we do the next test tomorrow." He said and I stood up stretching.
"To make sure that I actually have diabetes, yea ok, I get it. Are we done for today?" I asked and he nodded.
"Good day to you, Ms. Giovanni." He said before I walked out. I walked out of the hospital and walked over to Morty. I got in the car and sighed.
"Where to now, Morty? No way in hell am I going back to school." I said out loud. I thought for a second before just deciding on going back to the house. But I couldn't take Morty with me, I'd have to drop him off back at the school. I drove back to the school and had parked the car in the same spot where it was. I got out of the car and walked all the way home, stopping at The Dot to get some hot chocolate before going there. I dug deep in the soil of the little garden Eli's mom had in the front yard to look for the spare key. I finally found it, brushing it off with my fingers. I unlocked the door and walked in, locking it back. I walked up to Eli's room and opened the door looking around. I looked around for his i-pod dock to plug my i-pod in. I plugged it in and put it on shuffle. The first song that played was Lost in Stereo by All Time Low. I kicked off my shoes and stood on Eli's bed, setting my hot chocolate done on his bed side table. I started jumping up and down, bouncing to the beat of the song. My mouth started to open, lyrics pouring out. It felt good to let loose since I've been so tightened lately. I mean, diabetes, getting arrested, almost having bipolar disease? Who goes through this stuff? Throughout the song, I could feel my hips shake to parts of the song. After the song ended, the next song was Run This Town. I jumped off the bed, thanking god that no one was home. I would probably never act like this if someone was watching. I grabbed one of Eli's many rings from his dresser and tried it on. 'Hmm. Not bad.' I thought. I thought for a second and ran downstairs, bringing my bag back upstairs with me. I dug in my bag for something to write with and found a light green pen. I grabbed a small book from my bag and started writing. If you're wondering, it's not for school. I wrote, thinking everything, but stopping mid-sentence. I looked around at Eli's room again as the song Hot N' Cold came on. Something caught my eye and I stood up to look at a picture. It was a picture of Eli and me, when we were thirteen. It was the last day of school in the picture and he had kissed my cheek in the picture while I faced the camera, winking, my tongue sticking out. I stared puzzlingly at it while the song ended and Ignorance started playing. I stared at the photo for a while until turning from it and continued to write.
I had wrote about 5 small sized pages of stuff. Just random stuff. I heard the house door open and Eli's voice rang through the house.
"Ghost!" he yelled. I didn't answer, I just grabbed the photo from before and sat back down on the bed as I heard him walk upstairs. The next song started to play and I blushed at the fact that it was one of those sappy romance songs. I quickly changed it as Eli walked in and I heard him yell "Whoa!" I turned around and quickly and said "What?"
"Why was your butt in the air?"
"Well why'd you look?" I asked. He didn't answer and I smirked.
"Yah, that's what I thought." I replied as One of The Boys played. He looked at the photo I was holding and dropped his bag.
"You found that huh?" he asked. I looked down and nodded smiling.
"I can't believe you kept it. I mean, I still have mine, but it's not in a frame." I said as he laid down on his bed next to me.
"Where'd you keep it?"
"Near my heart…lol joking, I keep it in my wallet." I said laughing. He laughed too, taking the picture.
"Did we use to date back then?" he asked and I looked at him weird.
"Um…well I don't know, maybe?" I said shrugging. He leaned up and sighed.
"All I wanna know is…are those feelings…still there?" he stuttered and I was kinda shocked that he even brought it up. I mean, since we met, I've a crush on Eli. It wasn't major, but a normal junior high crush. And then when we went to different schools, it was just saved in the back of my brain until it came back. I wasn't sure if it was back though. Plus, I knew Eli liked Clare. I would never mess up what they barely have.
"Eli…the feelings are…mutual. I mean, I love you-" Eli's lips pressed against mine and I felt my body freeze. I felt my arm go around his neck as he continued to kiss me. He pulled back and I stared at him for a second before jumping up and falling off the bed. I quickly got up and started pacing.
"No, no, no, no, no." I said. Eli looked at me as I continued to pace.
"Dude, why did you do that?"
"You said you love me, I was doing what you wanted!"
"As a brother!" I yelled at him. We paused for a second before I smoothed my hair back with my hand.
"I don't feel the same way. Clare is gonna freak. And then Gabe… oh god Eli!" I said sitting on the bed.
"You, need to calm down. Clare doesn't have to know because it didn't mean anything. And Gabe…you can decided whether to tell him or not. And just so you know, I don't feel that way about you either." I glared at him and he just shrugged.
"Ok, but I need some air." I said grabbing my i-pod from the docket and about to walk out.
"Wait!" Eli said. I turned. "How'd the screening go?" he asked seriously. I sighed and said "I have to wait until tomorrow. To know if I have diabetes. But my blood sugar is 128. Which is right above the line of having pre-diabetes. Which means I'm this close to having diabetes." I scrunched my fingers together showing how close it was.
"Wow. That sucks."
"Thank you, Eli, that's such a sweet thing to say." I said sarcastically, turning back around.
"Sorry, but I honestly don't know what else to say." He stated. I turned back around.
"You didn't have to say anything." I said, trying not to sound rude. I walked out the room and down the stairs. I opened the door and walked down the front steps, not really knowing where my destination was. 'I have to tell them.' I thought. I started to walk towards Clare's house, feeling like I was walking on air. I made a sudden halt in front of her house. I breathed in then out before walking up to her door and knocking. After a few seconds, she opened the door with a surprised look.
"What are you doing here?" she asked.
"Ok, does anybody know the meaning of the word 'hi' anymore?" I asked, trying to break the tension. She laughed and said "Sorry, it's just you usually don't come unexpectedly. Is something wrong?"
"We need to talk."
"About…"
"What I haven't been telling you or Alli." Her eyes went wide and she closed the door behind her as I walked over to the freshly cut lawn. I sat down and pulled my legs to my chest. She sat down next to me and said "So, what haven't you been telling us?"
"A lot. For one thing, if you haven't heard people talking about it, then it's been said that I have bipolar disease, but, thankfully, I don't. But I might have diabetes." I started and I eyed her carefully. Her eyes went wide at the news.
"And today, I didn't go to school because I had a screening. I mean I went to school, but then I remembered I had the appointment so I had to leave and I decided not to go back-" She stopped me with her hand saying "I think I got it."
"So I went back home, also known as Eli's house. Blasted some music, looked at some photos, and Eli came back after school. We talked…and talked… and then…we kind of kissed." I said, my head turning from her face with almost every word.
"You did what?" she asked shockingly. I winced. I so saw this coming.
"We kissed, but it didn't mean anything. He only did because I said I loved him-"
"You what?" she asked again.
"Dude, stop cutting me off and listen. When I said it, I meant to say, before he cut me off with his lips, as a brother. Which means that I'm not in love with him. I just love him. So don't go killing me over nothing." I finished. She stared at me with her mouth open and waited a while until she finally spoke.
"So, does Eli feel that way about you?" she asked.
"No, he only did it because he was worried about my feelings instead of his own. Very gentlemen like." I commented and she smiled reassuringly.
"What, happy he isn't taken?" I laughed. She didn't say anything, just blushed hard.
"Oh so you are." I smirked, standing up, stretching. She stood up too, brushing the grass of her skirt.
"Oh, and one other thing. Me and Eli used to go out in junior high, yeah!" I said using fake happiness. Clare's face fell and so did mine.
"Um, why didn't it work out?" she asked, biting her lip.
"We couldn't stay together because I was going to a different high school. But I didn't tell him I was going to Degrassi, which is why he looked all shocked when he ran over your glasses." She slightly laughed at the memory.
"You're not mad?" I asked hopefully.
"No. It was in the past, so it doesn't matter, right?"
"Right! Ok, now I have to tell Gabe. Thanks for not freaking out!" I said hugging her.
"No problem. I think." She said pulling away. I smiled before taking off down the block. I stopped halfway and gave myself a mental head slap. I don't know where Gabe lives. I searched my phone and heard footsteps behind me. I turned around and glared.
"Well if it isn't Scarface." Fitz said smirking.
"What do you want Fitz? Another beating from a girl?" I asked crossing my arms.
"Cute. But I just wanted to get to know you better." He said getting closer to me, making me take a step back.
"Yea, I sure got to know you better when you ripped my best friends hood ornament off, and when you were close to sexually assaulting me, and, oh yeah, when you pushed my friend into my locker. You're just full of getting to know people, aren't you?" I said, about ready to turn around and walk away.
"Of course I am. Now, about getting to know you…what are you doing tonight?"
"Stabbing my ears with daggers after even having this conversation." I said turning around to walk away until he grabbed my arm with a viper like grip. I tried to tug away, but he just held on tighter. But I wasn't gonna let that get me scared.
"Hey, I'm trying to be nice. You could at least appreciate that." He spat out.
"Maybe I'll appreciate it when you let me go." I kept tugging on my arm, but he wouldn't let go. It was really starting to hurt.
"Stop being a whiny little bitch." My head snapped to him and I stared daggers at him. I kicked his leg and snatched my hand away, starting to run. I heard him running after me and slipped my hoodie on top of my head, trying to better hide myself. I turned a sharp turn and ran into an alley. I stood there for a minute as I watched him run by the alley. I sighed and slipped my hood off, walking out of the alley and looking back at him running.
"Hey." I jumped around, snapping my head to see the person who greeted me. I exhaled at the sight of Gabe holding coffee. If there was ever a time to love coffee, it'd be now.
"Oh, just the person I was looking for." I said. He smiled and took a sip.
"You look worried. Come on, let's head to the park. It's a good place to talk." He said grabbing my hand. I felt my cheeks get warm as we walked hand in hand to the park. I hardly ever go there, I don't really know why, I just don't. We walked inside the park's opening gates and sat on the first bench we saw.
"So, what's up?" he asked, resting his coffee on the side of him.
"You have to promise not to get mad if I tell you." I said looking him in the eye. I was always serious when I looked in a person's eyes. They always seemed to take the hint.
"Ghost. I promise not to get mad if you just happened to have sex with a some random guy." He said sarcastically. I laughed, even though I shouldn't have laughed at this moment. He just always seemed to break the tension with people. It's what I loved about him.
"Eli kissed me today. But it didn't mean anything because he only did it when I said something that he took the wrong way." I said. Gabe stared at me until taking a sip of his coffee to show me to continue.
"I told him I love him, hence the kiss, but I meant as a brother. Because I don't have any siblings." I continued. Gabe continued to stare at me while sipping his coffee. I couldn't help but laugh and then stop for a second, trying to hold it in.
"You make it so hard to be serious!" I said my giggle fit starting. He stopped sipping his coffee and laughed too.
"It's because life isn't awesome without laughing. If life's all serious all the time, then everybody would die of boredom. Which is why I'm the life of the party." He said. I stopped giggling and smiled.
"So, you're not mad or anything?"
"Why would I be? You said it yourself, it meant nothing." He said taking another sip.
"Wow. You are, like, so…different from…"
"The kids at your school? Yeah, they're no fun. It's all about being popular and trying to survive high school. I'm not trying to survive. If anything, I'd like to stay in high school for a while. And at your school, everyone's the center of attention, even if they don't wanna be." He explained. I was surprised that he changed his mood so fast. It was almost unhealthy.
"Wow. That's deep, man." I said smiling. He turned to me and smiled back.
"Yeah, you should read my lyrics sometime. People say it's good, but they're just people." He said looking down at his coffee cup.
"And what am I?" I asked.
"You're you. The awesome girl I met at the rock show." He said and I felt my heart speed up. I looked down at my sneakers and said "That's so cliché."
"So what if it is? Aren't words what make life what it is?" he asked shrugging.
"I guess. But if we didn't have words, then what we would use in life? Or would life not even exist?" I asked looking up at him. He gave me a confused look and I shrugged.
"Weird. But we'd probably communicate with hand signs. Like dance moves, or sign language." He answered. I nodded, trying to understand our weird conversation.
"You mean like deaf people."
"Sure. But deaf people can actually speak, they just wouldn't be able to hear themselves." He added and I rolled my eyes. I watched as Gabe finished his coffee and checked his watch.
"Are you ready to go?" he asked standing up. I stood up too, shaking my legs for the numbness to go away.
"Yeah. And if we meet up again, give me your lyrics. I bet they're good. And I'm not just saying that 'cause you're cute." I smirked. He gave me a raised eyebrow and said "You think I'm cute?"
"No, I think you're hot. But that's a different conversation on a different day." I saw a smirk appear on his face as he leaned closer to me.
"Well," he leaned closer to me, passing my face to whisper in my ear. "I'll wait until the next day." He pulled away from me laughing at the sight of me blushing so much. I gave him a playful glare before walking away, folding my arms so I wouldn't get cold.
"Don't forget, we've got a date tomorrow!" he yelled out to me and I gave him the peace sign, showing I already knew. I walked the rest of the way home and opened the door, surprised it was open.
"Hey Eli, you left the door…open…" I trailed off at what I saw.
"Ghost. It's so nice to see you again." Eli's mom said with a smile, engulfing me in a hug. I hugged back, smiling slightly, seeing behind her Eli's dad with his arms folded, Eli with his hands in his pocket and a police officer. I gave him a confused look, but his head was hanging so he didn't see. Eli's mom pulled away and I had just noticed she had tears in her eyes as said "We. Need to talk. It's about your mom."
A/N: Ooooh, cliffy!