A/N: I'm sorry that my last two chapters were short and uneventful, they are just filler chapters. Actually, the last one i like to call a "bridge" chapter since it sorta connects two scenes...but who cares? LoL! Love the reviews, thank you sooo much, they really help me. Cuz sometimes iget bored of writing (short attention span) and then i check my email and i find all these nice reviews and that is what makes me go back to my writing. (btw, i am having SOO much fun writing this, it is just my attention span that won't let me go on for more that 10 min.)
Disclaimer: You know what it is...Stephenie Meyer owns everything.
I looked at my silver cell phone on the other end of the bed. "I can do this." I told myself, but it didn't help at all. I wish I could use my own power on myself. If I could only make myself trust myself. (If that makes any sense!) I picked up the phone and dialed Edward's number, I had it memorized. I pressed the call button and waited impatiently.
"Hello?" I heard Edward's concerned voice.
"Edward?" I asked, not really needing to.
"Oh, Bella." He sighed out, "I was so worried. Did you get my message?"
"You mean messages!" I laughed and I heard Edward's nervous chuckle on the other end. "Um, I think we should meet somewhere to…um…talk." I stuttered.
"Of course, I'll come and pick you up!" He said excitedly and hung up before I could say anything. I hung up the phone and looked at myself at my full-length mirror. Okay, my hair is a total mess, and my clothes look way too expensive for me. Gosh, I hate it when Alice buys me things! I hope I looked good to Edward. I heard a car door slam, but that would have been barely audible to a human ear, so I guess my hearing is good!
I ran downstairs and opened the door before Edward could. I smiled at him and took his outstretched hand. He led me to the car and helped me in (as if I needed it!) We started driving, but all I was doing was looking at his perfect features. I missed him so much.
"I missed you." Edward broke the silence. I shook my head to get out of the daze and smiled slightly. How could he know that? He couldn't read my mind…
"I missed you, more." I challenged him.
"Are you sure about that?" Edward snarled playfully.
"Uh huh!" I mumbled and kissed his hand. I looked around the familiar car, and remembered what we needed to talk about.
"Edward, where are we going?" I asked.
"Our meadow, of course. We need to spend more time there." He informed me. I nodded, looking at the landscape speeding by. It was sunny. I would get to see Edward's marvelous skin again! I was now excited, but I must remember my reason for going out with him in the first place.
I squeezed his hand in mine, feeling another surge of happiness. If he had never changed me, I would have died, literally.
Soon, Edward slowed the car in front of the thick forest.
"Can I run?" I pleaded, wanting to feel the exhilarating sensation again.
"Um…" Edward contemplated, wanting to carry me. I interrupted his thought process before he could decide.
"I can do things on my own, you know!" I smiled at his scowl, "But, if you really want to carry me, then you can carry me back."
"Okay!" Edward's grin lit up my day. He started running and I was right behind him. Of course, he was way faster than me, but it wasn't too hard to keep up. The air whipped across my face, trying to make me falter, but I wouldn't let it. I narrowly missed huge trees, making me laugh with pleasure. Each time I was getting close to a tree, I would close my eyes and then open them at the last second, seeing how close I could get to the tree without hitting it. But soon, my game finished because we were at the beautiful meadow. I heard the same sound of flowing water that I had heard when I first came here. But this time, I knew it was a creek, just northeast of here. I walked into the sunny meadow, leaving Edward to dust off some twigs that had stuck to his clothes during the run. The sun was warm, making me feel the warmest I had ever felt since becoming a vampire. I looked over at Edward. He had just finished pulling a leaf off his pant leg, and now he was staring at me. I didn't know what he was staring at, so I looked down to the ground, feeling self-conscience. A strand of hair came in front of my eyes and I put it back behind my ear. But just as I was sweeping my hair away from my face, I stopped, shocked at what I had just had a glance of. I had seen a sparkling, shiny thing that wasn't my hand. I slowly lifted my hand and stared at it. It was glowing! The diamonds that Edward had in his skin were shining on mine. My jaw dropped, not really feeling like I was real. The same way I had felt about Edward, thinking he would disappear at any second.
"You look so beautiful. I can't believe it…" Edward trailed off, walking toward me. Once he hit the sun, he also lit up like a diamond, but he didn't make a show of noticing. He kept walking toward me, staring at my face, legs, and my arms. I just stared at him, now totally uninterested in myself. He looked so beautiful, too beautiful. I couldn't believe it myself!
He traced my jaw, looking at my skin deeply.
"I thought that you were already the most beautiful person ever, but now…well now you have exceeded anything I ever thought was possible." He whispered. He kissed my cheek, seeming like he was testing my skin. Once he felt that my skin was normal, he moved his lips to mine. He kissed slowly, making me melt into his arms. Why did he have to do this to me? But soon, the daze was stopped by my memory. I wanted to get this conversation over.
"Edward?" I mumbled against his lips. He didn't stop kissing me, making me angry (actually, not that angry, but I really tried to be.)
"Edward?" I said again. I heard him sigh deeply and reluctantly pull away.
"Yes darling?" He said. I noticed his eyes looked a little sleepy, in a dreamy way.
"I want to talk about the other night." I forced myself to say. The sooner I told him, the sooner I would be in his arms, again.
"Oh yes, that." Edward frowned. We both sat down on a log and he faced me.
"I want you to promise me one thing, though." I told him, looking him straight in the eye.
"Of course."
"You can't interrupt me until I'm done." I said.
"But…"
"No, you can't!" I smiled at his cross face. He nodded and I started to talk. "Edward, you know I love you. I'd love you forever and ever and still feel it wouldn't be enough. So, when I was thinking about why I had stopped that one night, I knew for sure that it wasn't because I didn't love you enough." I sighed, remembering how long I thought about this. I looked at the ground, not wanting to let my nerves take over and make me chicken out. "I thought for a long time. I didn't know why I had stopped. I mean, I love you! It didn't make sense when I got the chance to do something that I knew I had thought about and that I wanted to do it with you, as a vampire, I stopped!" Edward looked at me questioningly, "I became a vampire not only to be with you forever, but to let you be relaxed when you were around me. Not worrying about how you would get through the day without drinking my blood." I answered his question.
"I stayed in my room, wondering why the hell I was acting so strangely. I couldn't figure it out. If I had had any doubts, I wouldn't have asked you to change me in the first place! I was very frustrated." I told him. "Then, I thought maybe I was scared of…you know…of 'It'." I blushed at my stupid remark, but Edward just took my hand, showing he was here for me.
"I knew that wasn't it because I'm never scared of anything when I'm with you. Then, it had hit me. The reason I hadn't let it go any further because I didn't want you to loose control." I stopped, letting myself glance up at Edward's face. He didn't have any emotion at all, so I went on. "I know that now that we are both vampires, it is impossible for you to loose control, but I don't want to push you too far…" I felt Edward squeeze my hand.
"Bella, that isn't possible. You shouldn't worry." He said. I looked down, wondering if I should scold him for backing out of his promise to not interrupt me.
"I know, but I just feel that way. I know you can do it. It is just the feeling that is throwing me off." I said. His long arms picked me up and laid me on his lap.
"Hun, you don't have to worry." He pulled my hair back and whispered into my ear.
"I know, I just…"
"Shh…" Edward stopped me before I could say anymore. He rocked me back and forth, seeming to make all my troubles to go away. "I am fine. I can go as far as you want to go. I don't care, as long as you're happy." He whispered again.
"Edward," I started to say, but couldn't exactly remember what I was going to tell him. Having him touching me was not a huge help either, "I love you too much. Way too much." I giggled.
"Don't worry, I'm in the same dilemma." He retorted.
---0---
For the rest of the day we were in the meadow. At random times Edward would suddenly fly out of nowhere and pounce on me. He would start kissing me, and I would relax, knowing everything was okay.
One time, I was using his arm as a pillow as I looked up at the blue, cloud free sky.
"Edward?" I broke the long silence.
"Hmm?" He asked, stroking my hair.
"What was your first reaction when you saw yourself in the sun?" I asked. He looked up in thought.
"I was very shocked. But since Carlisle had told me, I was prepared." He told me.
"But, then how did Carlisle act when he first saw?" I asked, wondering what would happen.
"Well, he tried…" He trailed off for a reason unknown.
"Tell me." I tugged on his shirt in a kiddish way. He kissed me lightly on the lips, making my grip on him loosen and my foolish whining stop.
"Carlisle tried to take out the 'diamonds'." I heard Edward chuckle a little, but I thought that was kind of weird.
"Huh?" I asked.
"He resented the fact that he was a vampire, of course, and so he didn't want
these," He slid his hand up and down my sparkling arm. I shivered involuntarily and from the look on Edward's face, I knew he was enjoying this. He kissed me lightly on the lips again, this time motioning to open his mouth. I obeyed, but my past fears were banging on my stomach, telling me to stop. I didn't want to pull away, but I did.
"I'm sorry." I apologized quickly. "I'm really really really sorry."
"Don't be." He took my head in between his hands and brought my face one inch away from his. "You're mine forever, and that is the most I could ever want." His breath tingled my skin, making me smile a little. He let go of my face and we both laid back down, my head on his shoulder.
"Can you be mine forever?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood.
"Whatever you want. I'm your slave." He breathed out. He kissed my neck and then laid back and closed his eyes.
I sat up a little, watching him "sleep." He was too beautiful, especially in the sun. I traced the muscles of his arm, just like the first time we were here. I saw him smile as he felt my finger start tracing his facial features. I got to his lips and traced them as well, but before I could move on to his forehead, he had his mouth around my finger.
"Ed, let go!" I whispered. He merely shook his head. I thought for a while, wondering how I could get my finger out of his mouth without fighting for it. An idea popped into my head.
I kissed his neck and then trailed up to his jaw. I would use his own tactics against him…hahaha! I then kissed his nose, then his chin and just to tease him, I kissed the corner of his mouth. I felt the grip on my finger loosen a bit, but not enough for me to wiggle it out. I then kissed more of his lips. I felt his mouth starting to give in, but he wouldn't let me go without a fight. I went to his ear with my lips.
"If I kiss you, will you let me go?" I asked. He smiled (with my finger still between his beautiful lips) and nodded. He let go of my finger and I shifted a little, making myself comfortable. I placed my lips on top of his and started moving them slowly. I felt him respond and soon he had flipped me over onto my back and was on top of me. I ran my hands down his back cautiously and then, right then, I let myself go. I didn't care anymore. I knotted my hands into his golden hair and kissed him harder. Edward hesitated a little, but then did the same right back. To. He had his hands on my hips, gripping then slightly. He took off his shirt and then proceeded to take mine off. But I stopped, unfortunately.
"On grass?" I asked, grimacing a bit. Edward started rolling with laughter at my statement, but I still looked at him with a quizzical eye. "What?" I asked.
"You are almost too much!" He said. But finally his face became serious and he looked me straight in the eye.
"Do you want to go home?" He asked. I nodded, feeling stupid, again, for ruining the moment. I quickly put my shirt on and got up, holding my hands out in front of me like a little kid. "I'm excited to carry you." Edward winked at me and swung me on his back. He ran faster than I had ever seen him. Actually, faster than anyone I had ever seen! When we got to his car, he carelessly threw me in the passenger seat and quickly made a U-turn and went 150 mph all the way home. Once we got to the house, he picked me up and ran to his room. He shut the door loudly and put me on the bed.
"Better?" He said, laughing a little. I nodded and got up. I tugged on his shirt toward the bed.
"I'm far better than better." I said and kissed him deeply, letting him sweep me away, the way he always did.
A/N: My note up there...that was REALLY LONG! Sorry. WEll, i get some complaints about the legnth and stuff, well this was 7 pgs, i think, so hope you like it. If you want longer tell me, i can try to stretch it out. Actually, i can really make this 10 pgs, but i know that if it isn't interesting the WHOLE time, ppl don't read...so ya