Author's note: Just wanted to thank all my reviewers and all you that have the story on alert!

_flashpoint_

When Spike and Wordy made their way up to the burn floor they were surprised to see everyone waiting out in hallway.

"What's going on?"

"The doc asked us to leave, they're checking his bandages." Answered Greg.

"Well…how is he? Is he in pain…does he remember…does he know yet?" Spike was rattling off questions trying to displace the fear he had for his friend.

"Woah-woah, just settle down Spike. He seems to be holding his own physically at the moment. But yes he knows about what's going to happen once he gets out of here." Spike stared at him waiting for Greg to elaborate. "I saw Sam reacting to the news two different ways…one he would fight it and not listen to us or two…just give up and accept it. And unfortunately he's doing the latter." He answered disappointed.

"But isn't that good though? I mean that he's ok with it, that he won't live in denial?" Asked Natalie worried what could be worse than pretending everything would be fine.

Ed who showed up a little before Wordy and Spike stepped forward. "No, it's not. Guys like your brother know only the job, once that is taken away from them forever they no longer feel they will ever be themselves any more…never feel useful again. And the reason you've seen your brother as a strong fearless guy despite some bad situations is because he had hope, a purpose…a reason to fight. But now he's giving up, and mental health plays a major role in how the body heals."

Just then the doctor and nurse stepped out of his room, closing the door.

"How is he doing?"

"As well as can be expected. We've just cleaned and redressed the wounds. He has a slight fever, but that's to be expected after such a trauma to the body."

"Well can we go in and see him now?" Asked Spike eagerly.

"Actually…he's asked to not have any visitors at the moment. Just let him be alone with his thoughts for a while. Besides I just gave him his next dose of pain meds so he should be asleep within a half hour. Wait till then, and then I would say you can go sit with him."

_flashpoint_

Spike told everyone that he would take the next watch of sitting with Sam while the rest went home for the night. They had just had a team dinner and drinks and it felt nice to be out doing other things than sulking in his house. As he sat there next to him, he knew he couldn't give into the self loathing and guilty feelings he had about everything. Sam had enough to deal with and he didn't want to add his own misgivings about everything.

He sat there with a magazine he took from the waiting room, but never really read anything on the pages though, just lost in different thoughts. Now and then he would look up at Sam and make sure he was ok. The kid laid there completely still except for his overcompensating chest as he tried to breathe the best he could.

As the sun was setting Spiked looked up again, but this time he saw Sam's eyes open, just staring at the ceiling. Spike wondered how long he was like that. Putting the magazine down he scooted the chair forward.

"Hey there Samtastic!" Sam just tilted his head over to face Spike giving him a tiny smirk that quickly fell. "Listen…I…I just want to say that I'm really sorry." Raising his eyes to Sam's confused ones. "I lead you guys in that place…"

"Spike…you came to…my sisters' aid. I'm sorry you…got dragged into…her past. The only people to blame…are those men."

"I just needed to ask for your forgiveness."

"Well…as much as it's not…needed, I forgive you." 'God talking should be not be this strenuous.' "You need to…get those ideas…out of your head. I do not…hold you…responsible for this…got it?"

Spike saw how much pain Sam was in already and didn't want to keep adding to it by going in a roundabout conversation. "Copy that buddy," Spiked smirked. "Hey how bout I turn on some TV. Yeah?"

"Sure."

Spike would cautiously glance between the television and Sam. The man now had his head turned in the opposite direction of him and just stared off through half lidded eyes.

'Oh Sam I wish I knew how to fix this…"

_flashpoint_

It had been almost two week since the team's lives were flipped upside down. For the most part Natalie, Jules and Spike were the main visitors in the hospital. Greg had been in out spending his other time at the barn in meetings and interviews. And Ed had just returned from a short vacation up north with his family.

Now he and Spike were taking their shift in the dreary stale room while Jules and Natalie finally took a break and went out for a girls day.

"Hey there buddy! Long time no see eh?"

Just a short "hey Ed" was all he got as a response. He had been told that Sam was depressed and just sleeping all day. Granted during that time he had been trying to hold off his fever from getting worse, but Ed knew there was more to it.

"How ya holding up?"

"Fine." cough

Ed glanced over at Spike as he sat down on the other side of the bed. He just gave him a look of 'yah he's been stubborn like this the whole time.'

A few hours later a nurse came in with a tray of food. "Alright Sam I've got your dinner here."

He just ignored her.

"Sam you listen to the nice nurse." Ed wasn't going to feed into his pity party. Everyone else's ways of getting him over this hadn't worked so Ed was going to try tough love.

"I'm not hungry!" cough cough

"Ma'am, you can leave it here. We'll make sure he eats it."

She just nodded, a little off put by all the testosterone rising in the room. She leaned over to Ed before she left, "do what you can, he's been fighting us on eating anything lately."

Then Ed finally spoke up after a few minutes of awkward silence. "Sam, I get it. I.."

"Understand. Ed you.." cough cough "you can't understand."

"I get that this isn't you. The Sam I knew wouldn't roll over like a dog. He would stop feeling sorry for himself and working on getting better!"

"Ed, come on man." Spike knew what Ed was trying to do, but all he was doing was getting Sam worked up.

Ed just raised his hand to silence Spike. "No I think he's scared. Scared of having to move on with life in a different way!" He didn't want to hurt Sam's feelings, but they were running out of tactics of trying to get him to fight. If getting Sam to hate him was the only way to keep him not only alive in the hospital but also from becoming another statistic of ex-cop turning his gun on himself, then Ed was completely fine with it. He just hoped it wasn't going to back fire on him. "You know what I've seen! I've seen a team of people that care about you so much that they have been here for you day and night and all you do is blow them off!"

Sam reached up and removed the oxygen mask, "out!" cough "I…want you…out!" cough cough

"Hey Ed, why don't we just step outside for a sec huh?" Suggested Spike after some of the machines in the room started to beep faster.

"No he needs to hear this. Feel that anger Sam, that's good. It's the first time I've seen you express some other emotion other than feeling sorry for yourself." If Ed knew Sam like he thought he did, then Sam would want to prove him wrong and show him up.

"What the hell is going on in here?" A very upset nurse came running either alerted by the machines or raised voices that something was wrong.

"It's alright, everything is under control." Stated Ed.

"I would think not. If you don't want to be permanently removed from the hospital I would suggest the both of you step out for a moment while I actually try to help my patient." The nurse said glaring at Ed while placing the mask back on Sam.

. . . . . . . .

"Ed what the hell man?"

"Spike…"

"No I get it, I get it, you're only trying to help. But screaming at the guy? I don't see how that's in his best interest."

"He's a soldier and not just one from when he joined up, but since birth because of his father. He's been taught not to show weakness or ask for help. To buck up and follow orders. So I thought that since all the other options we tried hadn't worked I would try using something he was use too. Granted in hindsight it didn't work exactly the way I planned though."

"Hey where are you going?" Spike asked Ed as he was walking toward the elevators.

"He's not going to want to listen to anything I have to say right now. I'll come back in the morning to apologize. You staying the night?"

"Yah. I told Jules to keep Natalie at her place; the girl hasn't slept in a real bed all week."

"Alright see you tomorrow."

_flashpoint_

The next morning, before the sun had even risen, Spike was startled awake by a coughing fit from Sam. He got up and made his way quickly across the room. Per the usual Spike would try to help Sam sit up and take a few sips of water. However, this time when Spike lifted the mask he saw that Sam's lips were blue and his skin was hot and sweating.

"Sam! Buddy…Sam…hey just calm down…it's ok…I'm getting help!" Spike was trying to calm his friend while frantically pushing the call button the side of the bed. And that's when he realized that the coughing fit he thought Sam was having was actually more like unsuccessful gasp for air.

Spike had seen dead fear in Sam's eyes. He could only imagine what was going through his mind at the moment. But then as people started running into the room, Sam's eye's rolled into the back of his head as he started to shake.

. . . . . . . . .

Aaahhh cliffhanger!

Finally a chapter that went mostly the way I planned! So what did yah think? Aaww Sam could never blame Spike. What did you think of Ed's tough love approach? I really wanted to make him sound like a hard ass, but all in the nature of trying to help Sam.