Notes: Here we are at the last chapter of Alluring Mystery. I'm starting to wonder if this is an unintentional prequel to Make Your Decision. Haha. As for the Pharos references from the last chapter, there were two: comparing Death to the wind and Ryoji asking Junpei if "something happened." That one was pretty hard to catch, but Pharos used that phrase right after the Shinjiro incident. I believe it's the same event where he compared Death to the wind.
Also, for those who rather dislike Ryoji's fans, did anyone notice how in chapter 5, he called her "Mikako-san," while during the Social Link event, he called her "Mikako-chan"? A subtle difference, and I just noticed it, but I think it's more proof of his rejection and one of the coolest mistakes I made. ^^
Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the final chapter!
*tsuki-no-usagi-kaguya-hime: Haha, oh dear, and Pharos is already wearing the stripes. XD
*NameIsBleh: Thank you! I'm glad you like my stories! ^^
*haitechan: XD Ryoji is surprisingly easy for me to characterize. Although he's always so happy, I'm sure he has a lot on his mind. ^_^ I wish he could have joined SEES, but it probably wouldn't work out. :(
*Tristes: I saw a fanart once of Ryoji as a SEES member wielding a scythe, and that was going to be the weapon in the video game scene, but then I realized that the Nyx Avatar had a long sword. ^_^ I'm happy you liked that chapter, it was very fun to write.
*witchjuliana12: Ahh, I'm sorry, but this really is the last chapter. After Ryoji reaches his conclusion, there isn't anywhere else for this story to go. :( But once I have time to write it out, there will be a side-story! :D Though it will mostly revolve around chapter two and three.
*The Detective Prince: Death Memento Mori is such a huge motif in Persona 3 that I suppose Atlus being mean is inevitable. v_v Akihiko and Ken (and maybe Shinjiro) are the only lovers route characters that make it to the end, but then Minako dies. .
*blazblue-domo: Haha, I'm happy you liked the last chapter. I thought chapter five was serious, but this chapter is much much more serious. I hope you like it. :D
*AngelMiku: I'm glad you caught the Pharos references; I wasn't sure anyone would. :D And the "top floor" line is probably one of the most ironic lines I've ever written; I rather like it. I look forward to anything RyojixMinako, but I'm afraid I must ask what a FST is. ^_^;;
*aprilsierra: Oh my! :o I don't know if Pharos's lines changed in P3P, but I explained the references in the notes. XD I always squeal to myself when I reread the "Protect her" line. Heehee, even Junpei gets his significant lines.
Conclusion: Truth
The beginning of the end.
Such an oxymoronic phrase, and yet so much meaning behind it. There's the feeling of "beginning," pushing you to do what you must, but there is also the feeling of the "end," urgently reminding you that the deadline is coming soon. For Ryoji, he felt the "end" much more strongly than the "beginning," like he was living on borrowed time. The peaceful times will soon be over, and he had to hurry for he had things he needed to do: He had to tell Minako how he felt.
So he called her the following Sunday, asking her if she was free to come out. She was, and together they snuck into the school and climbed to the rooftop. With the usually noisy building quiet for a change, the atmosphere was much more relaxed than normal, and because they were so high up – so high they could see the glimmering ocean in the distance – it was like they were at the top of the world. The sun was shining, the breeze flowed gently through their hair, and for all that mattered, the world could consist of just the two of them. No more interruptions, no more doubt to cloud their judgment. All that remained was the truth.
The "truth" was the beginning. The "end" was…
Sadness…
"When I'm alone…I don't feel right." Alone, he has too much time to think. "Thinking about you…it scares me." Too much thinking that he will hurt her. "The fact that tomorrow will come…scares me. But I can't figure out why."
Tomorrow was just that much closer to the "end," that much closer to the sadness, the sadness that he will bring about. What Ryoji didn't understand was why he was so sure they were traveling down a hopeless path to pain. Would telling her his feelings make any difference? Would knowing the "truth" make any difference?
"I-I…I'm…"
Just who was he? Who was he to bring pain to the girl he loved?
"You're Ryoji."
Ryoji looked to her. Minako watched him carefully, her eyes locked in a steady gaze with his. As always, the weird things he said didn't frighten her off. She listened to everything, taking it all to heart, trying to figure out the best answer she can give, her "truth." Her kind heart; how could he bring sadness to it? He wanted to pull away. He wanted to save the kind heart he loved so much. Like when he sees her smiling face, the dread made him want to turn his head out of shame. But he couldn't. Her kindness was so alluring, so tempting, as if it offered some kind of redemption for the sin he's going to commit.
Ryoji laughed lightly. "Hearing my name from your lips makes it sound so wonderful…" Not just wonderful, but…real. "Thank you…"
Minako smiled at him, but she stayed silent. She knew he still had more to say.
"I…don't want to lose you." This was Ryoji's "truth." His feelings; the things he most wanted to say. "Because you're important to me…that's probably why I'm scared."
The premonition of the "end" always makes time feel like it's moving too quickly, marching on forever without concern for those living in it, without concern for who lives or who dies. And Ryoji could do nothing about it. Time was running out.
"You're…the only one there is for me. The only one I want. So please, stay with me."
He said it, his true feelings.
His "true" feelings, even the feelings he didn't like. "Stay with me," he had said. Not "I love you" or "Go out with me." Those suggested a long-term agreement. "Stay with me" was temporary, suggesting that an "until" is going to follow, indicating that eventually, she will have to leave his side. Much more fitting to the "end" he felt coming.
Perhaps not the ideal confession, but Ryoji was sincere. Minako liked that about him.
Ryoji could not look her in the eyes as he confessed. How could he, knowing the consequences of what he was asking, that any association with him would lead to sadness and pain? But her kind heart…the redemption it seemed to offer… Warmth overtook his hands, and for a moment he thought her warm heart somehow manifested itself, but he looked at his hands and saw Minako's fingers interlaced with his. Again, she smiled at him, and from the look in her eyes Ryoji knew she had an idea of what she was getting herself into. She too could sense the "end."
"Okay."
"Minako-chan…" She knew. Maybe she knew everything, and she still accepted. "Yeah… Thanks." Despite the gloomy thoughts that prevailed his mind while he confessed to the girl he loved, Ryoji still found enough happiness in him to smile. "You're the most precious thing in the world to me… More precious than my own life."
They never let go of each other's hand, and they looked back out to the ocean. It really sparkled differently than the river back in Kyoto, but it was still beautiful. Maybe even more beautiful than before, but Ryoji already knew the reason for that.
"Why does it hurt when I see things that are so beautiful?"
Beauty is always much more touching when you know it's not going to last.
{00}
"So dude, you really told her?"
"Yeah…"
"And now you're like…official?"
"Yeah…"
Visitors in the dorm was apparently against the rules, but since Mitsuru said it was alright, no one seemed to mind Ryoji's presence. Besides, it wasn't as if he was bothering anybody. Minako wasn't home from her sports club, but Junpei was the one who invited Ryoji over in the first place. And maybe it was a good thing Minako wasn't around; Junpei had so many questions about how Ryoji confessed that they had nearly forgotten their original intent was to play Innocent Sin together. Of course, they did play a bit, and Ryoji was actually happy his friend was so curious. It was more proof that Junpei was back to his old self.
Junpei laughed. "I gotta hand it to you, Ryoji, I was beginning to think that girl would stay single forever." He leaned back and looked to his alarm clock. It was nearly evening, but for some reason Ryoji thought Junpei wasn't looking at the time. Not the current hour, at least. "Honestly, I was worried that we rely on her so much that she couldn't have a life of her own…"
"Stop calling me that, this isn't Tartarus…"
Ryoji watched him carefully. "…Are you talking about SEES?"
Junpei turned his head so quickly that his hat nearly flew off his head, but Junpei was far too wide-eyed to really notice. Ryoji chuckled at his friend's obvious reaction, and then Junpei laughed too. "You know about that, huh? Did Minako tell you?"
"Not really, I just gradually noticed on my own. Minako-chan only told me that it was dangerous."
Junpei fixed his hat, smiling to himself. "Right…I remember you asking questions. Always scared the hell out of me since Minako was never around to bail me out. She was good at the cover-story thing."
Ryoji laughed to himself. "Actually, your nervousness was one of my bigger clues, Junpei-kun."
Junpei laughed too and leaned back again. "Damn, I better work on that." His eyes roamed back to the clock, and this time, he really was looking at the time. Mitsuru said visitors were okay during the day, not the evening; Ryoji would have to leave soon. "Want one more round of Innocent Sin before you go?"
"Sure."
"'Kay, I'll go get us a couple of drinks. Wait here."
He scrambled to his feet and quickly left the room. Ryoji stayed in his spot: right in the middle of the messy floor of Junpei's room. He looked around, admiring the decoration that was so fitting to Junpei's personality. He was always amazed how each student in the dorm had his or her own room. As far as he knew, most students in dorms have roommates, but not SEES. Perks of being in the club, Ryoji joked to himself. Of course, he had visited Junpei on multiple occasions, and he already had an idea of where everything was. And naturally, he had never been to the third floor, where the girls' rooms were. I wonder what Minako-chan's room looks like…
Against his better judgment, and against Junpei's request for him to wait where he was, Ryoji stood up and left the room. Before he even realized it, he was already halfway up the stairs to the third floor. It was quiet, everyone was downstairs, his feet seemed to move on its own, and no one was around to stop him. In a daze, he reached the third floor, and upon looking down the hall, his eyes immediately rested on the farthest door on the right. Something was drawing him there.
Somewhere in this dorm…is a room I know very well...
Nostalgia was drawing him there.
He knew the moment he stood face to face with the door on the far right. He had never been up here, no one had ever told him, and there were no nameplates, but he knew at once that it was Minako's room.
"I met him when I came back to Iwatodai, and every now and then I would meet him at night. Sometimes we would just talk, but he would also warn me of oncoming danger."
He reached his hand towards the knob, moving ever so slowly, as if in a dream.
("My dearest…")
"My dearest…"
"Ryoji! What are you doing up here?"
Ryoji felt a jolt run through his entire body, snapping him out of his daze and back to reality. In his surprise, he took a couple steps backwards; he realized how awkward a situation he was in, and depending on who found him, he could be in a lot of trouble. He turned, and Junpei had his head poked out from the staircase, watching him from afar. At first, he looked confused, but when he realized what door Ryoji was standing in front of, he began to grin.
"You're not trying to ditch me, are you?" Junpei stepped into the hallway, still grinning. "Chill out, Ryoji, I'm sure she'll be back before you leave."
"N-no, that's not…I mean…" How would he explain this?
Finally, Junpei burst out laughing. "I'm kidding, man. No worries, I get it." He shook his head and sighed, trying to calm himself. "Seriously though, we should probably get off the girls' floor before Mitsuru catches us. I don't think I can survive another execution."
They both shuddered and ran down the stairs as fast as they could.
{00}
"Oh, welcome back, Minako-chan," Fuuka said, "You're late. Ryoji-kun was just leaving."
Of all the luck. Of course she would come home right when he had to leave. He had just made his way downstairs to say his goodbyes when the front door opened and Minako walked in. She flashed her usual smile as her eyes met each of her friends, but she blinked in surprise when she found Ryoji among them. He grinned at her shock. She was so cute.
"Minako-chan! Welcome back. Shame you weren't here. I was hoping I'd be able to see you."
Minako set down her school things and folded her arms across her chest, smiling like she always did. She didn't look tired, but Ryoji wondered why she came back so late. Maybe her sports club? "Well if I had known you were here, I would have hurried back sooner." She was teasing him, most certainly, but Ryoji knew that she was still telling the truth. He would have done the same.
"Haha, oh really?" He glanced at the clock. "I'm sorry, but I gotta get going…I'll come see you again."
For a moment, Ryoji wondered how many people knew about their relationship. He had only told Junpei, but Ryoji had no idea if Minako had told anybody else. Would it be appropriate to act like lovers? Or should he play it safe in case Minako wanted to keep it a secret? Maybe that would be best, for now anyway. What he wanted from her at that moment wasn't something he wanted to share with outsiders, whether they knew or not.
He made his way to the door, drawing closer to Minako. But before he passed by her completely, he quickly brought his face closer to her ear and quietly whispered, "…Could I go to your room next time? I'll be looking forward to it…" Without waiting for a response, he stood up and continued towards the door, throwing out one last "See ya" before stepping outside and closing the door behind him.
The cold, winter night air made him happy to have his trademark yellow scarf, and for a couple seconds, Ryoji just stood at the top of the dorm's steps, waiting for his body to adjust to the temperature change and listening to the voices of his friends that continued on inside.
"Minako-chan…" came Fuuka's voice, "Are you all right? Your face looks a little flushed…"
A small giggle escaped Ryoji's lips before he could stop it, but he covered his mouth with one hand in order to keep the rest inside. How adorable, he could just picture Minako's blushing face as she considered what he had just told her.
"I-It's just the cold, Fuuka," Minako answered hurriedly, making Ryoji giggle again.
"Alright, if you're sure…"
Ryoji started walking down the steps before his laughter would get him caught. He placed his hands in his pockets to keep them warm as he strolled down the street, putting distance between him and Minako. Just what was drawing me to her room? he asked himself. If Junpei hadn't interrupted him, he would have certainly opened the door. But Ryoji was just as shocked as Junpei to find himself there, drawn to her room almost unconsciously, as if he was momentarily under a spell. If he saw her room, if he got to go inside, what answers would he find there? What truths would he find there?
Maybe he'll find the truth about himself, and what he really is. Something was changing inside him; he could feel it. But it was an odd change, almost…reversed. A month before, he felt like just a normal student going to a normal school with normal friends. But now…now he felt detached, separated…different from the "normal" he badly wanted to be.
Like…he shouldn't even be here in the first place.
He touched the ring on his finger, the reminder of the fun times he's had. Although much more dreadful, the feelings he felt now were similar to what he felt on their last day in Kyoto. Happy times, enjoyable experiences were all about to come to an end. An "end." So when he saw the ring, he bought it so it would serve as a reminder of the happy times. This time, as he felt himself get closer to this new "end," he thought he might not have a chance to get a souvenir, so instead of worrying, maybe he should try simply treasuring these last few precious moments of happiness.
What else was there to do?
{00}
"Hey, if it's alright…Could I come to your room? There's…something I want to talk to you about."
It was an innocent enough question. Ryoji had no other intentions than to merely talk to her, but he was still surprised at how readily Minako accepted his request that could so easily be misunderstood. He was really beginning to wonder how much she knew about him. Any girl would have been shy about bringing a boy into her room, but Minako sensed immediately that something was on his mind and was willing to hear him out. Was he just an easy person to read, or was their bond really that strong? Ryoji hoped it was the latter; he had a feeling that a strong bond was going to be the only way to make the "end" easier for both of them.
They didn't speak much on the way to the dorm, and Minako quietly lead him up to the third floor. Maybe she was trying to be considerate, allowing him to gather his thoughts before they reached her room and he would have to start talking. But there were no thoughts for him to gather – not yet, at least. Not until he saw what her room looked like.
She opened the door, lead him inside, and… How can this be? The nostalgia once again.
"I think this is…my first time."
The curtains, the desk, the size, even the bed, it all looked so familiar. He had been here before, but…this was his first time in her room. Déjà vu. Did he dream about it or something? Or like her friend, Pharos, did he come deep in the night? Yeah, right. He voiced his thoughts to Minako, excluding the Pharos bit, and she laughed, calling him "Romeo."
"Ha…I'm being serious." He laughed, but deep down, he thought it was fate that she brought up the tragically famous couple, Romeo and Juliet. "I think that I did come to see you. Probably to become friends with you…" Maybe his Pharos thought wasn't so farfetched as he thought. "Ha…but I got it all wrong." He looked to the ground, suddenly feeling ashamed to look at her face. "If I hadn't gotten this all wrong…If we were just friends, I wonder if it wouldn't hurt so much."
Was it even possible for him to be just friends with her? …Did he really want it that way? He was attracted to her right from the start, and he didn't regret confessing to her. Besides, even if they were just friends, it would probably hurt just the same. Friendship and Love are so closely related. You can't have Love if Friendship wasn't there first. Despite every dreadful thing he felt, he didn't regret anything he had done.
"Still…I'm glad. I'm glad that I met you."
Whether he loved her or not was irrelevant. Whether they were friends or not was irrelevant. It hurt because he met her. It hurt because it was her.
"You have such a kind heart. You shouldn't give so much of yourself to me. I'll…probably make you sad." Her kind heart, it was what he loved most about her. "It's just a feeling I get. Even though you're so precious to me…" Maybe it was fate, or maybe it was their bond that let Minako bring up Romeo and Juliet. "It's probably wrong of me to feel this way… It's like…a forbidden love."
He shouldn't be here, he shouldn't be near her, but he wanted to be…Was he here? It didn't feel like it. More like he was drifting farther away…higher. To the top of…
"Minako-chan, please touch me…" He stared at her hands, remembering how warm they were the first time he held them. "Make sure that I exist. Feel for yourself that I'm actually here…"
All this time, Minako had silently watched him as he spoke, saying nothing, but her eyes told everything about what she was feeling. She could sense the pain he was feeling, she knew how difficult it was for him to not even understand these feelings, and she knew what he wanted from her. As always, she accepted the things he said, no matter how strange.
Her hand reached out, gently touched his, and it was warm, just like it always was. These hands should always be warm... He wanted to speak, to tell her how warm her hands were, and how they made him feel, but he couldn't. Her gentle touch suddenly became a tight grip, and Minako pulled him towards her and held him in a tight embrace. Now, it wasn't just his hands. Her warmth comforted his whole body. It was so soothing, and in this precious moment with her he forgot all his worries. They were together…if only time could stop.
"I could touch your hand and say you're here, but it's not enough," she said, and her grip around his body became tighter. "You can touch air and know it exists, but you can't hold it in your arms." How did she do it? How did she always know exactly what to say? "…You're really here," she said quietly, and nothing more.
Really…how did she do it? In response, Ryoji lifted his arms and returned the embrace. He could feel her pressed against his chest, he could smell her familiar scent; she was "real," and if she said he was really here, than maybe he was. The warmth radiating from her body was so comforting, so gentle, and yet…so sad.
"You're…so warm," he said slowly, "It brings tears to my eyes…Why is that?" The tears, he almost wanted to let them fall. But he couldn't. Not in front of her. "Please, tell me… It's painful deep inside…"
They spent a long time together, just standing there in each other's arms. If only…if only time could just stop. They would be together like that forever and never have to worry about the coming end. But time marches on without concern for those living in it, and the time for Ryoji to leave came all too soon.
They parted, and Ryoji knew that this was the last night they had before the beginning of the end went into full swing.
{00}
If there were something he could have done, something to avoid this fate, Ryoji would do anything. But it was pointless. He could run away, he could try to fight it, or he could just accept it. No matter what he did, the end would come. It was…inevitable.
He had lied. There was one thing he regretted: he couldn't save her from it.
But there was no turning back, no second chances, and no way to avoid it. The beginning of the end was done. The happy times, the innocent days had passed. It was all over. No more pretending that nothing is wrong. The deadline is here. Face reality.
The time for the "end" has come.
{00}
Where…?
The Moonlight Bridge, normally bright with the headlights of cars, was now dark. The city, usually noisy with the sounds of people, was silent. In the dead of night, the full moon shone an eerie light on the quiet world. Everything was tinted a shade of green, the only color came from the scattered red pools of blood, and where there should be people stood large coffins. It was quiet, lonely, and Ryoji didn't know how he got here.
When…?
Did he come here on his own? What was the last thing he remembered? …Was he at school? He vaguely remembered leaving, and maybe talking to Minako a bit, but after that was nothing. Just a dark haze, a gap in his memory. So…why was he here? Why was he alone in this strange place? Why was he not afraid?
"I've been looking for you."
A voice, a familiar voice in this dark and lonely world. Ryoji turned around immediately, meeting face-to-face with Aigis. She was wearing that odd body suit she wore in the Kyoto hot springs, but it didn't strike Ryoji as strange. Nothing did anymore.
"You…you're…"
"What are you doing here?" Aigis's voice was strong, clear, and very serious.
"…Oh, that's right. You don't really like me, do you?" She had called him "dangerous" the day they met, and only now did he Ryoji start thinking that maybe her phrase wasn't as weird as he thought. "Well, to answer your question, I ended up here when I came to my senses. It's strange… The sky and the ground look so weird, and there's no one here." He looked around, taking in the odd scenery once again. So unusual, so strange, and yet, so…normal. "Something terrible has happened here, and yet I feel at peace."
At peace, like he'd finally come home.
"…Have you forgotten?"
"Forgotten what?"
"The Dark Hour – a time period few people are active during. But you, you've somehow adapted to it. Too well for a human, in fact."
"…We go out at night, and it is very dangerous."
Ryoji recalled Minako's words, and although Aigis was always one to say odd things, this time she seemed to make sense…if there was any sense left in this world. If Aigis was walking about at this strange, eerie hour, maybe Minako and the others could too…
"Yes… It's all so clear," Aigis continued, "Now I understand the reason behind this feeling I sense when you're around."
"You are a problem."
"You are not good. You are…my enemy."
"Your enemy?" At that word, it felt as if locked doors in his memory, doors he didn't know existed, suddenly cracked open. Past visions, past memories that were forgotten. They were coming back, leaking out slowly. The "truth" that Ryoji's mind had locked away. "That's right…On a night like tonight…the moon was full…It was long ago…"
"Yes… We met once before…as adversaries."
A night like tonight, with the full green moon high in the sky, a long time ago, at the very same place, he had met Aigis. That bodysuit she wore hadn't changed a bit since then. "Who…who am I? Who are you?"
These were the questions that would reveal everything.
"I am Aigis. The last remaining Anti-Shadow Emergency Control Weapon. A machine created to destroy Shadows."
"It stands for the "Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad…"
"It's about this wound…He blames himself for this."
"That's because you try to punch out every Shadow we come across, Senpai…"
"Teamwork isn't about babying each other while you stumble through the journey. It's about trust. Trusting in your teammates' ability to take care of themselves…and that they know you'll have their back if they need to stand down…"
Things were starting to come together as the voices and clues to SEES came back to him. It really was all connected. "Created to…destroy Shadows…"
"And you…your true name is 'Death.' You are the Shadow I sealed away ten years ago!"
The once locked doors of Ryoji's memory swung open, and everything he had forgotten rushed through his mind as if it were a movie. Ten years before, he and Aigis had fought right at the Moonlight Bridge. But of course, he was in a different form back then, his true form: the Thirteenth Arcana called "Death." He was just born, but parts of his body managed to slip away, leaving him incomplete, but Aigis still couldn't defeat him. As they fought, they barely noticed the wrecked car just several feet from them, and they noticed the small girl watching them even less. But because Aigis knew she couldn't win, she did the only thing she could: seal him inside that little girl.
That was how he met Minako.
That was where their bond came from.
That was why…he was human, if only for a short while.
"I remember! I remember everything." Ryoji clutched his head with both hands. "It all makes sense now. Who…and what I am."
So this is what his premonition back when he played "Hero's Way" was about. That was who he was: a Shadow, a monster…
…Death.
He did it. He solved the alluring mystery.
"Palladion!"
Aigis's Persona appeared, rushing towards Ryoji at an incredible speed, its blue cloak flapping wildly behind it. Aigis stood determinedly in front of Ryoji, intending to fulfill the purpose for which she was created.
"Stop. Don't be foolish, Aigis." He thought of Minako's face ten years ago, that look of childlike wonder as she watched two powerful beings fight. "There's no way you can win. I'm different than before." His voice was much deeper, more serious than he has ever been. It sounded almost foreign, so unlike his light, cheerful voice when he was with his friends. But those times were over. This was his fate.
"A machine is created for a purpose. Mine is to defeat you. I exist for nothing else."
Dark power pulsed from Ryoji's body in waves, easily holding back Palladion's assault. Yes, he was different than before. Ten years ago, he was incomplete. But now…now he was whole. The twelve missing pieces had returned because he led Minako to Iwatodai. His power created a barrier, stopping Palladion despite its desperate attempt to reach him. Energy pulsed out, protecting Ryoji from Aigis and her purpose.
"It doesn't have to be that way…"
But it did…because Aigis chose to fight. This whole thing is about choice. They both had a purpose, but both had a will of their own; Ryoji had to thank Minako for that. They could both decide not to fight. Nothing good would come out of it, and they would only hurt each other. But she was a machine built for a purpose, to defeat him. Ryoji was a Shadow, and he had a purpose too. He existed for one reason, and because Aigis chose to fight, that reason forced him to stop her from defeating him.
"I'm sorry…"
No matter how much he wanted her to.
Palladion was stopped, and the continuous waves of power, a power much stronger than ten years ago, wore Aigis down. She collapsed to her knees, Palladion vanished, and her parts started falling off. She was weak, she was defeated, and soon may cease to function all together. She spoke in a quiet voice, how she failed her mission, how because of her failure, she as a machine had no worth. And Ryoji stood there, watching. There was nothing he could do.
"I'm sorry, everyone…" she said. Her sorrow almost sounded human. "Minako-san…"
"Aigis!"
Yukari's shout was heard from across the bridge, and following her was the rest of SEES, including Minako. They all raced to help their friend, not even noticing Ryoji's presence. He watched them sadly. What would he say? How could they forgive him for doing that to Aigis? He watched as Minako took Aigis's hand, a gesture he no longer felt worthy of, and they talked briefly as Minako tried to figure out what happened.
"I'm sorry…" Aigis said again.
"There's no need for you to apologize…" Ryoji said. No matter what they would think of him, he would have to explain himself. It…everything was his fault, after all. He walked over towards them, and their shock at his appearance did not surprise him. They did not understand why he was there, and suddenly Aigis stopped moving.
"What's going on!" Akihiko demanded.
"It's all my fault," Ryoji answered simply.
"Wha…You did this!"
Mitsuru stopped him by saying that Ryoji wasn't showing aggressive signs and asked Ryoji to explain. So strange…a presence he once considered tremendous was now helping him. He had never spoken to Mitsuru that much, but he was grateful that even she was willing to hear him out.
"I'm the same as the beings you call Shadows."
"You're a Shadow?" Junpei asked, his shock clear on his face. Ryoji looked sadly to his first friend. He felt like he was betraying him, somehow, because of what he was. The embodiment of all Shadows, the union of the twelve Arcana. The Appriser. The Avatar of the Maternal Being. The Maternal Being, drawn to him, that will soon descend upon mankind. His existence was the proof of that. The Fall was now inevitable.
"…You're really here."
He had Minako confirm his existence. There was no more denying anything. All he could do now was talk. Tell SEES the "truth" about the Shadows. And how he met Aigis that fateful night ten years ago.
"She knew she could not defeat me. So in an act of desperation, she sealed me within a child who happened to be standing nearby." He remembered that child so well. That small child, standing next to a fallen car, watched him and Aigis fight with wide eyes. "That child grew up, carrying me inside her. And by a twist of fate, she later returned here…as a transfer student" Was it a twist of fate? Or maybe, despite being sealed, his desire to be reunited with the parts of his power he lost drew her back to her hometown. He looked to Minako, the only one among them who fit this description. She looked exactly as she did then. Although older, although much more beautiful, she still had the same look of wide-eyed wonder. She too knew what he meant. "Yes...'Minako.' I lived inside her." It explained everything: the nostalgia, their bond, that he assumed the identity of "Pharos," and how he came to be "Ryoji Mochizuki." It was all because of her. "Her special Persona awakened, as did the twelve Shadows, all in order to become one with me."
It was all because of him. He put her, and everyone else in all that danger. Everything…because he existed.
"It's all my fault. I'm sorry." All he could do was apologize. There was nothing else left. He didn't expect forgiveness. He didn't even expect Minako, the girl who had the kindest heart, to forgive him. He wouldn't forgive himself, so why would they?
"There's more I need…to tell you…"
But before he could continue, a wave of dizziness swept over him and, like Aigis, he too collapsed to his feet. He could feel his consciousness threatening to leave him, but the sounds he heard made him reluctant to lose it. He could hear footsteps, running footsteps; SEES was running towards him, still worried about him despite everything. And Minako…Minako was ahead of them, the one who dashed towards his side first. She called his name and gently lifted him into her lap the moment she reached him. She took his hand firmly in hers, and he felt that familiar warmth.
No…I don't deserve your warmth…I don't deserve you…
"Ryoji!"
Truly, truly, Minako was the kindest girl he had ever met. Even though she understood everything, even though she knew exactly what he was, even though everything was all his fault, she still cared. She was still willing to call him "Ryoji," though that name no longer applied. He was The Appriser, the living proof that everyone, including Minako, was going to die.
"Minako-chan…" he said, calling for her the way he always did while he was human. He reached out and gently touched her cheek. She looked so confused…and so sad. "I'm sorry…"
His hand fell away as he slipped into unconsciousness.
The "truth" is revealed.
The "end" has come.
{00}
It's all my fault.
If I didn't exist, no one would have to suffer.
If I didn't exist, nothing bad would happen to her.
She could have been happy, even if it wasn't me by her side.
It shouldn't have been me by her side.
I can't protect her from myself.
And now I'm going to lead my dearest to her death.
It's all my fault.
I'm sorry.
…I love you, Minako.
Notes: Such a tragic ending. But since Ryoji solved the mystery, there's not much left to say. Thank you everyone for reading this story to the end, and thank you for all your reviews! I look forward to them all the time, and they make me want to update faster. I would especially like to thank AngelMiku and aprilsierra for reviewing every chapter, even the prologue! So thank you both soooo much! ^_^ Although Ryoji's part in Alluring Mystery has ended, there is still a side-story coming up, mainly focusing on Ken and how he wounded Minako's arm. So I hope you'll read that and enjoy it too!
So, until next time!
~Seichou Maki~
