AN./ Well, I hope that you all appreciate the humor of this chapter! Which brings me to my special announcement:

ANOTHER NORRINGTON CHAPTER! YAY!

Also, today marks the 1-month anniversary of my membership on this lovely website! HUZZAH!

THANK YOU to Spirit of the Morning Flower, and to my good friend, elanordaughterofeowyn, for consenting to have a little appearance in this story. Nonetheless, an exclusive scene with MY baby—aren't I generous? ;o)

Well, enough of that (clears throat) My inner fangirl's been getting a little deprived lately :D

Also, a special thank you to my other good friend, Shayla, a.k.a. SayHeyAndYayLuvApplepie (she is always changing her penname :D), for playing an integral part in this story!

Enjoy! And please, R&R! Leaving a comment would really make my day :D

~ Silvertongued Dreams


Disclaimer: I do not own PotC—just my OC's and Norrington's hands and lips: I won them from the writers in a game of Liar's Dice! :o) LOL


Chapter Seven: The Monstrous Regiment of Women

"Oh, God, Phillip—you didn't," James Norrington groaned, massaging his temples.

Gillette tittered sheepishly. "Well, I did. So there."

"Well, it's one thing to go offer me a relaxing evening at your place after a hard day's work… but it's another thing entirely when you go off and invite forty unattached women as well, and claim that it is a surprise!"

"Sorry to rain our your parade, James, but, well, you aren't getting any younger, and if you keep on with this whole 'saving yourself' routine… you are never going to get around to anything!"

James's face reddened.

"Sooo," Gillette quickly continued to avoid trouble: "Without further adieu, I give to you… a parlor full of the most eligible women in Port Royal!"

Self-consciously, James closed his eyes: his head hanging slightly. He could hear the tall doors in front of him open, and then, all he could hear was the sound of gossiping girls.

When he ventured to open his eyes—(after all, how bad could an attractive group of women be?)—James wished that he hadn't. Before him stood a gaggle of young ladies who eyed his attractive form eagerly, and rushed toward him all at once.

"Oh, dear Lord, Phillip, I am going to kill you," Norrington sighed in despair.

Gillette covered his mouth and stifled a loud laugh as all the women, as if moving in unison, came up to him all at once.

— "Phillip! Where are you?(!)" came a soft—yet somewhat scolding—feminine voice.

Gillette cringed. "Oh, dear."

"Phillip! Please, Cousin, be a darling, and—oh, my goodness."

The young woman, Elanor Westfall, a fair blonde with soft gray-blue eyes, grinded to a halt as she stood next to her cousin and surveyed the monstrous regiment of women before her.

"Oh, Phillip!" Elanor cried in dismay. "What are you doing?"

His face became beet red. "I well, erm, Captain Norrington, um, wanted to meet—"

"Don't listen to that lying prig," Norrington growled as he made for the door. "Why, he—oh, Miss Westfall!" he exclaimed, quickly replacing his momentary lack of protocol with a charming smile. "I had no idea that you were in town! How lovely it is to see you again." Upon those words, he took her small hand, and kissed it.

Elanor's pale cheeks colored a bright pink. Norrington had always been a fascination of hers—one that she hoped, someday, would come to full fruition.

"It is nice to see you again, as well, James," she smiled. "It has been far too long."

James chuckled uneasily. "Well, I am glad that, after all these years, you still feel comfortable addressing me by my Christian name." He could not get his eyes off of her—he could not believe how much she changed over the past five years. No longer an awkward adolescent seeking guidance, she had blossomed into a very beautiful young woman.

"Of course, James. I cannot begin to tell you how much you helped me that summer," she returned with a sly smile.

Norrington stepped back, taking her in. "I am very glad that you remember that summer. It—was very special for me, too." He smiled warmly.

Gillette looked around agitatedly, staring at the horde of young ladies still gathered in his parlor. With one look from him, they realized that the party was over, and they started to dismiss themselves, one by one.

Like a gentleman, he nodded to each of them and escorted them to the door. Once the last one had left, he let out an exaggerated huff of relief: only to realize that James and Elanor were still talking, and had not noticed his absence.

"Well, that's just great!" he exclaimed irritably.

Elanor turned sharply towards her dashing cousin: her long, pearl earrings dangling wildly in the air. "Beg pardon?"

"I… oh, it's nothing," he returned, biting his lower lip.

She gave him a gracious smile, then, turned back toward the dauntingly attractive Captain Norrington. "Well, James, Phillip and I were just about to pay a call to Miss Julia Simmons! Won't you join us?"

Normally, Norrington would have said no, but the gleam of hope in Elanor's sweet and innocent eyes swayed him over completely.

"I—" he looked towards Gillette for approval: "—I suppose I might join you. But only for the sake of your good company, of course," he added with a charming smile.

Elanor laughed uneasily, blushing.

"Why, have I said something remiss? If so, I most heartily apologize," James returned with the utmost sincerity in his deep and mysterious jade green eyes.

"No—no," she replied, quickly clearing her throat. "Phillip, is the carriage ready?"

"Um, well, I actually never ordered it," he returned in a low, low tone.

"Oh, that's all right!" Elanor exclaimed sprightly. "We can walk!"


Gaily, they walked down along the beach, past Fort Charles, and for two miles, they chatted in the blazing sun, until they reached the wide-reaching estate of Miss Julia Simmons, a rich young woman whose parents had died and left her thousands of pounds. Many men had sought her hand in marriage, for her fortune was a most definitely alluring prize… but, unfortunately for them, there was—and always would be—just one man in her life. Her very possessive and domineering cat, Oliver.

"Well, here we are," Elanor said cheerily.

"I'll, uh, stay here," Gillette said, looking rather queasy.

Norrington looked at his friend skeptically. "Lieutenant Gillette, my good man, are you well?"

"No, not very," he swallowed. "I think that I will stay out here, if it is all the same with you."

"Now, really, that would hardly be proper—your cousin and I going in there, unchaperoned."

For a moment, Gillette said nothing. To anyone observant enough to notice, he looked like a poor man caught between two very undesirable choices.

"Very well," he surrendered: taking in a deep breath.

Elanor furrowed her brows at him in confusion, but, being the sweet, doting cousin that she was, she decided to say nothing.

"Miss Westfall?" Captain Norrington offered his arm with a grin.

"Why, thank you, my good Captain," she returned with a pearly smile.

UPON ENTERING THE MANSION, they heard the endless purrings of a contented cat, and when the manservant, Jones, escorted them into the parlor, they were greeted with the unique site of Miss Simmons—completely stretched across the sofa—with her doting Tonkinese pussy Oliver curled up against her stomach.

"Ah, Elanor! You came as you promised! Your dear cousin sent word to me that you had arrived back in Port Royal!"

Elanor walked towards her nimbly, and planted a light kiss on her old friend's forehead.

"Thank the Lord! This old Jamacian town was getting rather bor… ing…."

Her voice trailed off as she leapt to her feet: her long train of golden brown curls bouncing as she moved up to Norrington with a careful and practiced stride. "Why, Elanor! Naughty, naughty!" she teased in a singsong tone. "Who is this fine specimen of a man you have brought with you?"

James's face colored.

"Oh, this is Captain Norrington! He is an old friend of mine. He decided to tag along with us at the last minute. Captain, this is Miss Julia Simmons. And, Julia, might I present Captain Norrington?"

Julia wore a twinkle in her eye as she gracefully extended her hand to the handsome man before her. "Charmed… I am sure."

Norrington took her hand and kissed it—and Julia practically shivered with delight upon his gentle yet manly touch. "The pleasure is all mine, Miss Simmons," he said politely.

"Noooooo, I don't think so," Julia Simmons replied, straining a giggle as she backed away towards Elanor, and nudged her with her elbow. " 'Only a friend, eh?' " she whispered teasingly. "He's just too perfect!"

Gillette, whose face, by now, was turning purple after holding his breath for above two minutes, finally decided that he could take no more of this. "You do realize that we are still in the room, don't y—AHH… AHHHH…. ACHHHHHOOOOOOOO!"

"Oh, Phillip!" Elanor cried in alarm.

"C—Cat. Severe aller—ACHOO!"

"Good God, man! You look like you are about to burst! Are you all right?" Norrington asked.

Rather than replying to him, he desperately grasped Norrington's overcoat: he was practically falling over.

"Help me! Get that ca—ACHOO!"

"Oh, dear," Elanor muttered sympathetically.

"GET THAT BLOODY FELINE OUT OF HERE!" Gillette practically screamed before he had to sneeze again.

Julia's face turned red with rage. "Don't you dare talk to my Oliver in that fashion!" she exclaimed, rushing to her sofa and clinging the cat protectively. "If anyone should leave, it is you!"

The cat snarled as if in agreement.

Elanor's face went unbelievably pale.

"Out. Out! OUT!" Julia exclaimed.

"I think we'd better listen to he—ACHOO!" poor Gillette sneezed as Julia grabbed her maid's feather duster and started chasing them out with it.

"Definitely not the greatest call I've made in all my days," Norrington, flustered, said once they were a safe distance from the mansion. "And I hope that it is the worst I shall ever have to grapple with."

Almost as if to contradict James Norrington's serious demeanor, Elanor burst into a fit of laughter, and Norrington, unable to resist the urge, soon followed.

"What's so humorous?(!)" Gillette exclaimed irritably.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," Norrington and Elanor returned in unison: their eyes still twinkling with their restrained merriment.


Well, there you have it! I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter, my lovelies! I felt that some humor was needed… LOL. ACHOOO!

I have to work on releasing my new novel so please respect the fact that my updates will be a bit slower... but the next chapter is coming in a little bit… I promise! :o) Thanks.