Author's Note / Disclaimer: Sorry this is a few days late, it was supposed to be uploading on the 26th of May along with chapter... I've lost count of what chapter we're on now... Sam stop drawing on me! Hopefully this is a little more of a pick up than the previous chapter, if that made any sense *shrugs* I'm weird, so I won't really make any sense.

So I'm obviously getting a lot of coursework done xD I suppose I should put a warning for the "younger audience." I am NOT a good role model. In no way should my lifestyle be copied unless it's a love for Sherlock and Harry Potter.

I still own nothing it all belgons to Joanne Doyle and BBC Bro. (see what I did there? It's cause I'm lazy)

Enjoy

Those Badgers

'Hello Molly.' Sherlock smiled pleasantly at her as he threw himself down into one of the armchairs of the Hufflepuff common room. He looked around at the yellow hangings, the portrait of Helga Hufflepuff and many plants that lined the windowless walls. 'I've never been in here before. It's cosy… quite suffocating really.'

'How did you get in?' Molly blinked in disbelief. 'I didn't know you talk to Hufflepuffs!'

'Oh I don't, well, only you anyway. Justin should be more careful in the future, all I had to do was tap the barrel that was two from the bottom, on the middle of the second row. The rhythm I had to tap was "Helga Hufflepuff!"... I was hoping for something a little more adventurous, I suppose that's what Gryffindors are for... mind you, their common room entrance is quite mundane too.' Seeing Molly's perplexed gaze Sherlock added, 'Oh! I can lip read, Justin has made a habit of mouthing the password as he taps the barrel.'

'I thought you were with John?'

'I was.'

'What happened?'

'Mary Morstan. This really is an odd room. Where's the high ceiling and windows?'

'What about Potter and his friend?'

'They're celebrating. I thought you lot would be celebrating with pretty boy Cedric.'

'Sherlock!' Molly whispered sternly. 'Don't say that!'

'Why?' Sherlock followed her gaze to the corner of the room near one of the dormitory doors where Ernie MacMillan, Justin Finch-Fletchley and Hannah Abbott stood; no doubt discussing the first task. 'Oh, what's he going to do? Bore me to death with his life story? Face it Molly, Hufflepuffs are harmless –'


The doors swung open only to slam shut a few seconds later as hurried footsteps reverberated off of the walls.

'What did you do?' The voice was furious but concerned all the same. 'Molly told me she had to literally drag you up here!'

'Do you really have to be so loud John? This is a hospital, people are trying to rest.'

'You're the only one in here.'

'Am I really?' Sherlock opened his eyes, blinking in the bright light of the setting sun. 'That's funny, because you're here too.'

'Now's not the time to be a smartarse. What happened?'

'I was being a smartarse.'

'Who did this?' John indicated towards the cut on Sherlock's lip, the sling on his arm and the otter-like facial features complete with a tail.

'Hufflepuffs.'

'I don't know what you did Sherlock but fuck, you really did piss them off, didn't you?' John rolled his eyes and settled down in a chair next to Sherlock's bed.

'What do you think?' Sherlock motioned towards the otter-like features. 'Worth keeping?'

'Don't think you look any different.' John grinned. 'Bet Madam Pomfrey wasn't happy.'

'No. Then again, is she ever? What happened to Mary?'

'She went to the common room to join the party.'

'All right Mr Holmes, I've sent for Professor McGonagall. She'll come and sort you out.' Madam Pomfrey entered the Hospital Wing from her office.


McGonagall was not impressed when she heard the story behind the Hufflepuff attack. Sherlock had provoked them by questioning their abilities compared to the other houses and voicing his opinion of Cedric Diggory once again. From what could be told from Sherlock's story it was Ernie MacMillan, Justin Finch-Fletchley, Zacharias Smith, Megan Jones and Hannah Abbott that jinxed Sherlock before Wayne Hopkins transfigured his facial features and gave him a tail. It wasn't until Cedric and a few of his fellow seventh year peers; Derrick Hindel, Josh Gemmet and Stephen Hill saw the commotion and called the younger students off that they stopped. Derrick asked Molly and a sixth year girl called Ashley Coleman to take Sherlock up to the hospital wing.

After Madam Pomfrey ensured that she was somewhat satisfied with Sherlock's recovery she allowed him to leave.

'It's a shame really.' Sherlock sighed as he and John headed towards the Gryffindor common room on Saturday morning. 'I was becoming closely acquainted with that ceiling. Used to brighten my day.'

'If you really want we can go and visit the Hufflepuffs again.' Sniggered John. 'I'm sure they can reunite yourself and the ceiling.'


As December drew closer the weather grew harsher. Fireplaces in the common rooms were lit at all hours, the house-elves heated the four-poster beds in the dormitories every night so they were cosy for when the students crumpled into them each night ('That should impress Hermione.' John chuckled) and Madam Pomfrey had stocked up on as much pepper-up potion as possible ('Really? She makes it look like she's going to war against the common cold!' Sherlock had said after she had, once again, interrupted their lesson by asking Snape to whip up another batch).

The Gryffindors and Slytherins found themselves outside of Hagrid's hut in the pumpkin patch, apparently tempting Blast-Ended Skrewts to hibernate. Hagrid had explained what to do, evidently missing the stricken-looking faces of the students.

'Sounds simple enough.' Seamus laughed nervously.

'Com' here then.' Hagrid beckoned to him. 'Yeh can help me with the firs' one, an' then the res' can work in pairs.' Seamus dropped his gaze to the ground and slouched forwards, cursing himself for opening his mouth while the Slytherins leered at him.

'Now we're jus' gonna tie the rope aroun' the sting – ' Hagrid showed them how to do it as he explained again. ' Yeh take this rope, Seamus – Tha's right – an' now we guide 'im over to the crate –'

'This could only go dramatically wrong.' Sherlock muttered. Harry had heard him and frowned slightly. 'Don't deny it, Harry. We all know it will.' Seamus's expression turned to one of relief as the Skrewt neared the crate. He and Hagrid had guided the Skrewt halfway into the crate when it suddenly started thrashing around. 'Told you.'

The Skrewt's sudden movements had disturbed the other Skrewts. Within minutes the Skrewts were storming around Hagrid's pumpkin patch. Some of the class, with Draco Malfoy in lead, shrieked and ran for the safety of Hagrid's hut, others, such as Harry, Ron, Hermione and John, stayed to help seize control over the Skrewts. James Moriarty was the only Slytherin left outside. He leaned upon the fence, drew an apple out of his pocket and began slowly eating it, clearly enjoying the chaos pursuing in front of him. In the meantime, Sherlock stood in the middle of the pumpkin patch.

'Don't go there! You're cornering yourself – That end explo- never mind. Now really, do you really think that is going to work? No, use your brain –'

'Don' panic, now, don' panic!' Hagrid yelled in a fruitless attempt to calm the class. The class members who remained outside finally got control of most of the Skrewts. The final Skrewt had Harry and Ron cornered as they tried to shoot fiery sparks at the creature. The Skrewt was poised, ready to attack. 'Don' frighten him, now!'

'Yeah, we wouldn't want that!' Ron yelled sarcastically.

'Then you should probably stop firing sparks at it. You're only going to distress it even more.' Sherlock rolled his eyes. 'Bunch of ammeters.'

'Well, let's see you do better then!'

'Fine!' Sherlock drew his wand and pointed it at the soft underbelly of the Skrewt. 'Impedimenta!' The Skrewt froze in mid-charge. 'That was difficult, wasn't it boys.' Hagrid moved swiftly towards the Skrewt, hastily trying a piece of rope around the sting before the jinx wore off.

'Well, well, well… this does look like fun.' The voice was soft and forcefully sweet. Sherlock looked around to find the owner of the voice, it wasn't one he recognised but if he had to associate it with anyone it would be… 'Rita Skeeter, Daily Prophet Reporter.' She leaned on the fence; not too far from where Moriarty was still standing, she wore a magenta cloak with purple fur trimmings.

'What's she doing here?' John whispered as he drew level with Sherlock.

'This can't be good.' Hermione frowned. 'She's never satisfied unless she ruins someone's life.'

'Thought Dumbledore said you weren' allowed inside the school anymore,' Hagrid glanced at her wearily as he pulled the slow-moving Skrewt towards the others.

'What are these fascinating creatures called?' Rita smiled pleasantly at the Skrewt Hagrid was still pulling away.

'Blast-Ended Skrewts.'

'Really? I've never heard of them before… where do they come from?' Hagrid remained silent, contemplating his answer.

'They're very interesting, aren't they?' Hermione called earnestly. Hermione was trying to edge closer and closer towards Harry without being noticed. 'Aren't they, Harry?'

'What? Oh yeah… ouch…' Hermione glared at him for voicing his pain as she stepped on his foot. 'Interesting.'

'Ah, you're here, Harry!' Rita's smile broadened as her eyes found him.

'No.' Sherlock snapped. 'He clearly attends a wizarding school on Mars.' John nudged Sherlock in the ribs to shut him up and Rita gave him an offended look. 'Your own fault for asking such a stupid question.'

Rita merely shrugged off Sherlock's comment, although she looked highly put off and continued to address Harry.

'So you like Care of Magical Creatures, do you? One of your favourite lessons?'

'Yes.' Harry replied brusquely.

'Lovely. Really lovely.' Rita turned to address Hagrid again but she did not look at him. Her eyes scanned the students from those hiding in Hagrid's Hut, to those outside sporting cuts, burns and bruises and finally to Moriarty; who stood motionless gazing at Sherlock as though he wasn't even seeing him. 'Been teaching long?'

'This is on'y my second year.' Said Hagrid.

'Lovely –'

'Does her vocabulary stretch no further?' Sherlock grumbled.

'– I don't suppose you'd like to give an interview, would you? Share some of your experience of magical creatures? The Prophet does a zoological column every Wednesday, as I'm sure you know. We can feature these – er – Bang-Ended Scoots.'

'Blast-Ended Skrewts, Er – yeah, why not?' Hagrid grinned cheerfully.

'Because it's her job to – Oomph!' John had nudged Sherlock so hard this time that Sherlock had doubled over in pain.

'So,' Rita's smile broadened once more, her golden teeth glittering in the wintry sun. She retrieved her Quick Quotes Quill from her crocodile skin handbag, sucked on the tip and then poised it on a piece of parchment. 'How about The Three Broomstick this Friday at seven in the evening?' The Quill zoomed across the page as she made her arrangements with Hagrid.

'Tha's fine with me.' Hagrid replied, watching the Quill with a mesmerised expression.

'Lovely…' She replaced the parchment and the Quill. 'Well, goodbye, Harry. Until Friday night then, Hagrid.'

Sherlock and John followed Harry, Ron and Hermione up the sloping lawns towards the castle; Sherlock still massaging his stomach from the painful hit that John had given him.

'I was aiming for your ribs, I'm sorry.' John cast a concerned look at his friend. 'How does it feel?'

'How do you think it feels?' Sherlock shot through gritted teeth. 'I think your aim is a little off too!'

'She'll twist everything he says!' Harry burst angrily.

'Just as long as he didn't import those Skrewts illegally or anything.' Hermione replied anxiously.

'Hagrid's been in lots of trouble before and Dumbledore never sacked him. Worst that'll happen is that Hagrid'll have to get rid of the Skrewts. Sorry… did I say worst? I meant best.' Ron added.

They reached the Gryffindor table and settled down to lunch.

'Where do you think he got them from anyway?' Hermione asked, dishing out food between the five of them.

'Stranger in a pub?' Ron shrugged.

'I think he would've learnt his lesson the first time.' Harry responded.

'Maybe he did import them.' John suggested. 'He couldn't have gotten them from the forest, could he?'

'Maybe,' Hermione said thoughtfully. 'There's all sorts of creatures in the forest, so he might not have obtained them illegally.'

'Look at you lot.' Sherlock chuckled. 'Isn't it obvious?'

They all blinked blankly before saying 'No.' in unison.

'He bred them.' Sherlock said simply, buttering himself some bread to dip in his soup. 'They have the similar characteristics to Manticores and Firecrabs, I wonder whether he used magic to get them to mate… anyway; it's a huge violation against the Ban on Experimental Breeding. You're losing your touch Hermione, dear.' He grinned at her. 'Surely you knew all of that.'

'So… if Rita writes about the Skrewts, Hagrid will be prosecuted?' Ron gulped. 'Buckbeak was one thing, but these Skrewts are lethal, what if he goes back to Azkaban?'

'You don't use your brain, do you Weasley? Rita isn't going to write about Skrewts. Hagrid is a good friend of Harry's, she obviously wants a bigger picture of "our misunderstood saviour" and she's not getting anything from Harry himself.'