A/N: Thank you all for your reviews and support! I hope you enjoy this next chapter.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
**WARNING** This chapter will touch on a topic that may be triggering to some readers. Please read on with caution.
Chapter 7: The more I see of the world
Ana woke up close to noon the following day, thankful for the fact she didn't have to go to work since Charlie's party went until past three in the morning. When Ana got back home, she was too wiped out to do anything other than change out of her dress and collapse onto her bed. When she finally woke up, the sun was high in the sky, and the makeup she had forgotten to wash off was smeared all over her face.
After a long hot shower where she scrubbed the remnants of makeup off her face, Ana changed into jeans and a t-shirt before heading over to Charlie's house. She knew that Charlie was in the middle of packing for her move to Seattle, which was happening tomorrow, and Ana wanted to spend some quality time with her friend before she had to leave.
"Everything's pretty much packed now," Charlie said as Ana helped her tape up a large box in the corner of her nearly-empty room. "Dad got me a U-Haul truck, but that's just to bring my bed and furniture to my new apartment in the city."
"It's so cool that you're getting your own apartment," Ana grinned, turning her gaze to all her boxes. "I always thought universities made freshmen live in the dorms for their first semester."
"My new apartment is on campus, so it's technically considered university housing," Charlie smiled. "But yeah, I'm glad I won't have to live in a dorm room with some freshman girl right out of high school. I'll have my own space and my own freedom."
"I'm so jealous," Ana rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Sometimes I'm afraid I'll be stuck living at home with Mom and Dad for the next ten years."
"No way. You're going to be graduating with honors in a few months," Charlie insisted. "There are tons of companies that would simply love to hire you."
"I don't know about that. There aren't a lot of job openings in the publishing industry," Ana grimaced. "Even if I have the best grades in the world, it doesn't guarantee I'll get the type of job I want right out of college."
"Well, I have faith in you," Charlie stated. "That should be worth something at least."
"Thank you," Ana giggled, and she checked her watch. "Did you want to go grab lunch now? I'm really hungry for Chipotle."
"In a minute. After I finish packing up these books, we'll be good to go," Charlie said, gesturing to her bookcase where a small stack of books remained. "I, um… I also wanted to talk to you about something before we left."
Charlie looked hesitant, and she didn't meet Ana's eyes as she walked over to the bookcase. Ana frowned after her, feeling concerned.
"What's going on?" she asked, walking up to her. "Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, everything's fine," Charlie assured her. "I just thought you should know that… well… Jose stopped by this morning an hour before you came over."
Ana raised her eyebrows. "Really? Why?"
"He wanted to ask me out on a date."
Ana blinked, staring at Charlie in utter shock. "Wait - what?" she asked, flabbergasted. "He asked you out?"
Charlie looked uncomfortable as she nodded. "Yeah."
Ana let out an incredulous laugh, shaking her head in disbelief. "Wow, he really doesn't know when to quit, does he? I mean, first he asked out Kate and then he asked out me… seriously, he's just embarrassing himself at this point."
Charlie didn't respond to that, which caused Ana to look over at her. She frowned, noticing the expression on her friend's face. "What is it?"
Charlie packed away a couple more books, still not looking up at Ana. "I said yes."
What?
Ana stared at her. If there was anything Charlie could have said that would shock Ana more, this was it. "Wait… you said yes to going out on a date with him?" she asked in a tone of utter disbelief.
Charlie nodded. "Yeah."
Ana was speechless, and she felt her face heat up with embarrassment and shock. Did Charlie actually like Jose? Was she upset that Ana had been laughing at him? Now Ana felt terrible, and she didn't know what to say or do to make this better.
"Oh," she said quietly, unsure of what else to say.
"I know what you're thinking," Charlie said after a moment, and Ana looked over at her. Charlie finally looked up from the books to gaze right at her. "And trust me, I get it. Jose is kind of an idiot and I'm not blind to that. I knew what I was doing when I agreed to go on a date with him."
Ana blinked before frowning in confusion. "Okay… but if you don't like him, then why are you going on a date with him?"
Charlie turned back toward the books. "I mean, it's just a date. It's not like we're confessing our love for each other or anything. I figured since he lives in Seattle and I'm going there soon too, going on a date with him isn't the craziest thing in the world. I don't want to go live in a new city without knowing anybody, and this way I won't have to. It's a win-win."
Ana was speechless for a moment or two, taking in what Charlie said. Was she seriously saying the only appeal to dating Jose was logistics? "But you're going to college. You're going to meet a lot of cool people and make a ton of new friends, and probably meet an awesome guy who would love to date you. Why do you think you need to settle for Jose?"
"Because… I just do," Charlie said, shrugging awkwardly. "I'm sure you've noticed before, but I'm really awkward around guys. I'm not exactly the type of girl who can just casually flirt with men at a bar. I've never been that good at dating or relationships, and Jose is a perfectly nice guy who I don't feel awkward or uncomfortable around. There's nothing wrong with just wanting to settle for a nice guy."
"Why do you think so little of yourself?" Ana asked, frowning indignantly. "You're awesome, Charlie! You could have any guy you want, and he would be lucky to have you. Don't sell yourself so short."
"That's really sweet of you Ana," Charlie smiled at her friend. "And I appreciate it, but I know what I'm doing. I've been dealing with these issues for most of my life, and I'm okay with my decision."
Ana felt confused and a little concerned by what Charlie had just said. "What do you mean by that?"
Charlie's expression was rather sad. "It's kind of difficult to talk about, but it happened a long time ago, and I've grown a lot from the experience. When I was four years old, my family lived in Indianapolis and an uncle of mine started touching me inappropriately. It went on for several months before my parents found out about it, and they filed a police report against him. He went to jail, and we packed up and moved here to Portland."
Ana covered her mouth with her hand, tears filling her eyes as she stared at her friend in disbelief. "Oh my God, that's horrible. I'm so sorry that happened to you Charlie."
"Don't worry about it, I'm alright. I'd be lying if I said that that experience didn't affect me later in life, but I was still able to move on from what happened for the most part," Charlie said. "Although there are some things I still struggle with."
Ana could remember several instances in the past where guys would hit on Charlie at a bar or at a party, and she'd immediately clam up. Ana had just assumed Charlie was shy or something, but now it was starting to become clear why she was like that.
"So because of what happened to you, you feel that a real romantic relationship is out of the question?" Ana asked, frowning in concern.
"More or less," Charlie nodded. "I get super anxious around guys who flirt with me. I can't really help it, it's just a gut reaction. But I don't feel that kind of anxiety around Jose, and that's why I felt comfortable agreeing to go on a date with him."
Ana didn't know what to say to that. She felt sick to her stomach that one of her best friends had to go through such a horrible experience as a child, and that it continued to affect her to this day. Without thinking, Ana moved forward to pull Charlie into a big hug, and Charlie giggled as she hugged her back.
"I hate that that happened to you," Ana said sincerely, holding her tight. "I hate that you feel like you have to settle for Jose because someone hurt you as a child. I'm holding out hope you'll meet a wonderful, amazing guy at college who you could fall head over heels in love with."
"Thanks Ana, but I'm really not that much of a romantic," Charlie said quietly, finally pulling away. "People fall in and out of love all the time… it kind of sucks, but that's reality. Believe me, I'm okay with settling for someone like Jose, despite his personality flaws."
Ana wasn't sure how she felt about that, but she held her tongue. "If you say so."
"Ready to head out to lunch now?" Charlie asked, finally closing up the last box. "I'll drive."
Ana agreed, and the two of them headed out together, Ana's mind swimming with what Charlie had told her.
~The next day~
Ana had hoped the idea of Charlie and Jose dating would start making sense to her by the following morning, but she was still struggling with it. Charlie was such a smart, level-headed person, and Jose was, well… Jose. The two of them together just didn't make any sense, no matter how she looked at it. If Charlie said she was okay with her choice, though, Ana supposed she should just let it go. It was none of her business anyway, as Kate had stated when Ana told her what Charlie had done.
Charlie was moving to her new apartment in Seattle today. Ana wondered if Jose was going along with her, but apparently he was heading back to Seattle tomorrow with his dad, and he decided to go over to Charlie's house today to help with the move. Ana, Kate, and Leila all went over to Charlie's house around noon, and they immediately noticed the U-Haul truck parked in the driveway. Charlie, her parents, and Jose were all there, packing boxes and furniture into the truck, and Charlie looked up when she heard the sisters approach. She grinned.
"Hi guys!" she said happily, waving. The other girls waved back before walking forward - Charlie approached them, and Jose tried to follow, but instead tripped and fell over a box sitting on the grass.
"I'm okay!" he said, quickly scrambling to his feet.
"So he and Charlie are dating now?" Leila whispered to Ana, looking a bit flabbergasted at the pairing. Ana shushed her, not wanting Charlie to overhear.
"Hi Charlie. Do you need some help packing the truck?" Kate asked Charlie kindly as she approached them.
"No thanks, we're just about done," Charlie smiled at her. "I wouldn't make you lift heavy boxes with your fractured ankle anyway, Kate."
"My ankle's been doing a lot better, actually," Kate smiled, lifting her foot to show off her ankle which no longer had a boot on it. "I can easily lift and carry things without hurting my foot."
"Congratulations on your recovery, Kate," Jose said as he moved over to Charlie's side. "I'm sure you'll be alright, as long as you don't go falling off your bike anymore!"
Kate, who had been run over by another cyclist, didn't correct him as she gave him a polite smile. "Thanks Jose."
"Hi girls!" Mrs. Lucas, Charlie's mother, waved and smiled at the Steele sisters, and the girls all smiled and waved back. Leila walked over to her, and Charlie and Kate soon followed. Ana was about to go with them when Jose stopped her, grabbing her elbow.
"Anastasia, I was hoping to speak to you without Charlie overhearing," he said in a low voice. "Do you mind going over here for a moment?"
"That's okay Jose," Ana said firmly, pulling her arm out of his grasp. "I know you asked out Charlie, it's totally fine."
"Yes, you are correct. I did ask out Charlie," Jose said, nodding gravely. "But I want you to know that, just because I'm dating one of your closest friends, nothing has to change between you and I. I know that Charlie very much values your friendship, and I would hate for you and Charlie to be at odds with each other over me."
Ana couldn't help but stare at Jose in disbelief. "What?"
"I know, it must be very difficult for you," Jose said compassionately, putting a hand on Ana's shoulder. "Your friend is leaving for Seattle, and I'm going along with her. But I have faith everything will be okay… let's try to be adults about this, and we can give Charlie the send off that she deserves. Okay?"
Ana had to bite back her sarcastic retort as she gave Jose a tight smile, reaching up to take his hand off her shoulder. "Okay, Jose."
They walked back over to the others. Charlie's parents were finishing up packing the U-Haul truck, and Charlie herself was preparing to get in her car to leave. She said goodbye to Kate and Leila, all of them smiling and hugging with tears running down their faces.
"Oh my God, I'm such a baby," Charlie giggled, wiping her eyes before turning to Ana. Ana smiled, feeling her own eyes well up as she stepped forward to wrap her arms around her friend.
"I'm gonna miss you," Ana whispered to Charlie as they embraced. "Promise me you'll come back to visit soon."
"Of course I will," Charlie said, pulling away and smiling at Ana. "But not before you come and visit me in Seattle. I want to show off my new life and my new apartment to you."
"Deal," Ana grinned, and then added in a whisper: "As long as you don't make me hang out with Jose too much while I'm there."
"No problem," Charlie whispered back, and both girls giggled.
Soon, Charlie had finished packing up all of her things, and got in the car while her parents got in the U-Haul truck. Ana, Kate, Leila, and Jose watched them as they drove down the road and out of sight.
As the four of them left the Lucas's house and headed back home, Ana's thoughts dwelled on Charlie and Jose. She felt like she could sort of understand why Charlie agreed to go on a date with Jose, but her heart couldn't bring herself to fully agree with that decision. Settling for whoever was convenient just didn't feel right to Ana… loving someone and being loved by that person was the whole reason why people dated, wasn't it? Why would someone date for any reason except for love?
Charlie was a wonderful person, and Ana couldn't help but feel a bit bad for her. Finding love is hard for everyone, and Ana hated that Charlie somehow didn't feel like she deserved to have it. Ana still hoped Charlie would find someone in college who would love and appreciate her for the wonderful person she was.
Could Jack be that 'someone' for me?
When it came to her own love life, Ana knew beyond a doubt she wanted to be with someone who made her feel something real. She would never be able to deny herself true love, and as long as there were guys like Jack who made her heart pound and her cheeks blush, then she was going to keep pursuing what her heart truly desired.
A/N: Hope you all enjoyed this! Next chapter, Christian and Elliot get ready to head back to Seattle, and Kate wonders what her relationship with Elliot will be like after he leaves.
