The bitterness of the late November air whips the bare tree limbs outside and causes ripples against the once green grass. Birds all head south for the winter, to the warmer air awaiting them, and animals dig deep burrows, ready to hibernate for what is sure to be one of the coldest winters in history.

Thankfully you are inside on this dim and blustery evening, wrapped up in a dark blue turtleneck and dark blue jeans, having taken the time to change after school. Your auburn hair is left down, as usual, and is hanging about your bent head as you cut open yet another cardboard box that you decided to neglect until the end of the week, which happens to be today.

I don't know why Ray couldn't do it. You think, taking your time unloading the hundreds of CDs whose shipments never seem to cease. I mean he could at least help me. At the moment, your only co-worker is sitting up front, scanning the pages of, you guessed it, a magazine.

Wait. Ray, help me? What am I thinking? You think sarcastically to yourself, wishing you could call it true.

You ignore the sound of the mechanical bells as it buzzes, signaling someone has entered the shop. Well at least he has to do some work. You think with a soft sigh. You merely concentrate on your task that involves using no brainpower or...

Suddenly, there's a knock on the backroom door and, with another sigh, you stand, brushing the ever-present dirt from your jeans as you do so.

Grasping the doorknob, you swing open the door slowly and say, "What do you want Ray-"

But standing in the doorway is not Ray.

It's Hope.

Over the past couple weeks, you two have talked off and on, but really haven't planned anything solid. Though you will admit you like Hope. She's not as you first judged her to be. Sure she looks like every other snobby, two-faced slut that attends Jersey Prep, but she's really not. Surprisingly Hope is one of the sweetest, nicest people you've ever had the privilege of knowing.

"Hey Alex!" she says cheerfully, offering you a small wave. Dressed in a long sleeved, deep green Aeropostale shirt and dark jeans, her hair pulled into a neat ponytail, Hope looks the epitome of perfection, as always.

"Hi Hope." you say, playing a smile of your own.

"Listen, I was wondering," Hope starts, a small, brown purse clutched in her right hand. "I'm having a get-together tonight for a friend of mine; it's his birthday. I know parties aren't your thing but trust me, this party isn't going to be big at all, I promise. So what do ya say?"

You think for a moment, looking at the smiling Hope. Then, suddenly, over her shoulder you see the door to Wally's open and three of your five favorite people walk in, one of which is carrying a white, Styrofoam box. They greet Ray, the one holding the Styrofoam box setting it on the counter and then leaning on it, looking around the small shop and not noticing you talking with Hope in the doorway to the backroom.

Turning your attention back to Hope after your brief period of thinking, you begin to say, "Well, I don't-"

"Please Alex? I promise it'll be fun!" implores Hope.

Your barrier finally breaking after the constant weeks of nagging, you give in. "Sure, sounds like fun."

"Great!" Hope says, literally bouncing on the soles of her feet. "It starts at eight, but you can come when you want. Your friends can come too if you want, I'm sure they'll probably know some people and I wouldn't want you to feel uncomfortable."

You nod, following Hope back to the front of the shop as she says all this. Her purse is now in front of her and open while she digs through it. "I wrote the directions down, just in case you did say yes," She stops by the front door, the guys pausing from their earlier conversation to watch you two. She finds her car keys and holds them tightly in her hand, still searching for the paper with the directions on them. "But I can't find them... Ah! Here they are!" Smiling, she hands the paper to you and you quickly glance at it before putting it in your back pocket, returning Hope's smile.

"So I'll see you..."

"Probably after nine. That's when I get off work." you finish for her.

"All right. I'll see you a little after nine then!" Hope turns to leave, giving you a wave on the way out. Gerard and Frank clear a path for her and she gives them both a goodbye before heading out into the cold and to her awaiting red Ford Mustang.

"God how I would like to just-"

"Shut up Frank." you say as Hope drives away, the engine of her Mustang roaring all the way.

"What? Tell me you wouldn't wanna-"

"No, I wouldn't." you say flatly, crossing your arms and sticking your tongue out at Frank after he does it first.

"What was that all about?" asks Ray, gaining your attention.

"Hope wants me to go to some party tonight. Where's Mikey?"

You try so hard to be vague about your feelings for him. In the beginning you even tried to forget about them, but it was no use. Mikey Way is all you think about, all you write about in your notebook, he is everything to you and your feelings for him multiply day by day. You don't care that you'll maybe have to move in a month's time, or that Mikey probably sees you only as a friend. You're fine with only thinking about him, pondering over what it would be like to call Mikey your own.

Nothing was said about the night Mikey showed up at your place with the pumpkin pie the next day, not even a quiet conversation between you two. Your friendship hasn't changed much, though you wish it would, but deep down you know it won't. It just isn't meant to be. Both you and Mikey are too timid to do much of anything.

"He's at work." answers Gerard.

"What party? I wasn't invited!" yells Frank.

"Well you're invited now, Hope said you can all come." Frank grins widely. "It's a "get-together" for one of her friend's birthday."

"Do you know who?" asks Bob.

You shake your head and say:
Nope. And I don't really care either.
No.
I have no clue who it's for.
Nope.
You eat dinner with the boys, your meal including a grilled cheese brought to you by Gerard. After dinner, Bob, Gerard, and Frank stay for a little while before heading off to Barnes and Noble to bother Mikey. That leaves you to talk with Ray about the party tonight.

"So what time is this "get-together"?" asks Ray, chewing the last of his grilled cheese and then licking his fingers. You're seated on top of the glass counter, lightly swinging your legs back and forth as you flip through the pages of the magazine that was abandoned by Ray.

"Like eight, but we don't get off until nine so I told her I'd see her then." you reply.

Ray nods from behind you, looking at the magazine over your shoulder. "So are we all going to get a ride with you or what?" he asks, looking at your face which still is turned toward the magazine.

"Are we all going to fit in my Camry?"

"No..."

"Then that answers your question." You turn the page.

"Well I guess Gerard can take half of us..."

"Gerard's car is in the shop. Bob brought them over today." you say blandly.

"Well then Bob can take us."

"Call him." you say, flipping the next page in the magazine.

"What's with you today?" Ray asks, turning from you and walking to the phone behind the counter. "You're all...weird...and shit..."

You still don't lift your head, only your left hand to give Ray the one-finger salute.

"See!" Ray says, lifting the phone from the cradle. "You're PMSing aren't you?"

"No Ray, I'm not PMSing. I'm just trying to read a magazine." you say with a soft sigh in your voice.

Ray rolls his eyes, dialing the Barnes and Noble number he's now memorized. He waits a few seconds before someone picks up the phone.

"Barnes and Noble how may I help you?"

"God you act like it's a frickin' Pizza Hut or something; what are you going to do, have me order a book and get it to my house in under thirty minutes still warm or my money back?" asks Ray.

"Shut up Ray. What do you want?"

"Is Bob there?"

"You called me at work to ask if Bob was here?"

"Put him on the phone."

You smile just a bit, listening to the conversation at hand. There is a slight pause and then Bob is on.

"Miss me already?" you hear him ask.

"Hardly. I just wanted to know since we're all going to that party tonight if you can take like half of us because we all won't fit in Alex's car."

"What about Gerard's car?"

"My car's in the shop!" you hear Gerard yell in the background, causing you to snort in laughter.

"Well I guess. We'll meet you at Wally's after work and then follow Alex to her place and then leave from there?"

"Sounds good to me." you say, still not raising your head which Ray does not fail to notice.

"Hey Bob," Ray turns his back to you and you sense this, looking out of the corner of your eye. Your eyes wander fully away from your magazine and to Ray, listening to the conversation that he is trying to keep from you. "Alex is acting really pissy today. Do you know what's wrong?"

You narrow your eyes, straining to hear Bob's answer.

"Oh, yeah, I do." you hear Bob say, which sparks your interest. You finally raise your head and turn it towards Ray. "It's my fault actually. Tell her I'm sorry last night wasn't as great as the others."

Your eyes widen and you scream, "Shut the hell up Bob!"

Ray bursts out laughing and you can guess the others are laughing too over at Barnes and Noble. You angrily throw your magazine at Ray and he says, between laughs, "All right...I...I gotta go Bob. Later." Still laughing, Ray hangs up the phone and stoops to pick up the thrown magazine, turning to find your glare on him.

"I didn't know you and Bob were so...close." teases Ray, tossing your magazine back to you, only to have it fly back at him and smack him in the chest.

"We're not." you snap, vowing to get Bob back in some way.

"So who's coming with me?" you ask, standing before your car with your keys in hand, waiting impatiently as the boys huddle out in the cold in front of Wally's, darkness looming around you all.

"Shotgun!" Gerard immediately yells, leaping forward. You roll your eyes as Gerard rips open the door and hops in, Mikey climbing into the backseat; Frank and Ray move to Bob's car.

Sighing, you walk to the driver's side of your Camry, sitting down in the seat and then slamming the door shut behind you. The instant you start the car, Gerard flicks on the radio, turns the volume all the way up, and then turns it to 98 Rock.

"I'll only be a minute; I have to tell Steven where I'm going." you say, opening the door to your car and leaving the engine running. "Don't try stealing my car and don't touch anything, okay Gerard?"

Gerard looks up, his hand poised in the air only about an inch away from opening your glove compartment. He smiles widely and innocently and you merely roll your eyes, saying, "Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid Mikey." And with that you slam your door, running up to your house, the headlights of Bob's and your car illuminating your way.

You open your front door and immediately see Steven getting comfortable in his blue recliner, a Budweiser between his fingers. You don't even bother to go in the house any further and say to Steven, "I'm going to a party with some friends, I'll be back later."

Steven looks at you, your body halfway in the house and halfway on the front step. He can see the headlights and hear the car engines, and this causes him to frown.

"What friends?" he asks. From the moment he asks you can tell he isn't drunk yet and it's going to be a bit tougher getting out of the house.

"My friends." you say, eager to get going. "Gerard, Frank, Mikey, Ray, Bob?"

Steven frowns again and then takes a swig of his beer, turning back to face the TV. "No." he says simply.

You're shocked. "Excuse me?"

"You can't go."

You're speechless for a second. "Why not?"

"Because I said so." says Steven, his eyes glued to the TV.

"But it's Friday night!"

"I don't care."

"I'm not staying home Steven." you say, standing straight and about to back out of the doorway. "I'll be home later."

Steven snaps his head to look at you, a furious look on his face that makes you stop dead in your tracks. "I said no! You're not going to that party with those boys!"

Holding open the front door, you feel rage eat away at your insides. What the hell is Steven trying to pull? "You're not the boss of me! I'll go to that party if I want!"

Your eyes widen and you take a step back onto the concrete step when you see Steven get up from his recliner, his beer can still in hand. He appears at the doorway, looking out at you with inclement brown eyes. "Fine you little bitch. Get the fuck outta here. Go to your little party. Get drunk. See if I fuckin' care." He slams the door in your face, causing you to step back once more, dangerously close to the edge of the step.

You glare at your front door before storming off to your car, your keys grasped tightly in your hand; so tight you're sure there'll be marks.

You rip open the door to your car and plop down heavily in the seat, slamming your car door amidst wide-eyed looks from Gerard and Mikey.

"What was that all about?" asks Mikey, him and his brother having watched the whole ordeal.

You strap your seatbelt across your chest savagely, flinging your car into reverse and hastily doing so after Bob. How do you answer Mikey?
Don't worry about it.
Nothing.
It's none of your business.
It was nothing. Forget it.
You get to the party a little after nine thirty, after getting lost four times thanks to Gerard and his inability to read in the dark. The house, you notice, isn't that far from Hope's, and is just as nice and rich looking.

"Damn." Frank says, getting out of Bob's car as you shut your car door; both you and Bob found parking spots in front of the house.

Turns out, this is no small "get-together". Cars line the street on both sides and you can hear pounding music coming from the house as you and your friends all walk up to it. You can also hear the voices of probably over a hundred people packed into the three-story house. Different colored lights flash onto the front lawn and some people are scattered across that as well, drinking, making out, or just talking.

Just a small get-together? You think sourly, reaching the front door. You ring the doorbell and wait patiently for someone to answer, bracing yourself for what you know is going to be a night you'll regret.

At once the door opens and there stands Hope in all her beautiful glory. "Hey Alex! I see you brought your friends!" She moves away from the doorway to reveal an innumerable amount of people swaying to the pounding music, talking, carrying drinks to their friends, trying to navigate through the thick crowds, or hooking up with another person at the party. The lights are dim and smoke swirls thinly through the air, and you can feel the humidity of the house and all the bodies inside as you stand in the doorway.

You try to keep your eyes from widening as Frank pushes you through the door, excited. Gerard seconds him and then Ray, while you, Bob, and Mikey are less eager.

"I'm so glad you came!" Hope yells over the loud music as she shuts the door behind you. Frank and Gerard are long gone, but the other three are still in your range of vision, thank God.

"Yeah." you yell back, giving Hope a smile and then looking up at Mikey with an irritated look about you. You grab his arm and pull him down to you slightly and say into his ear, "Don't lose me. The last thing I want is to be alone tonight."

Mikey nods and pulls away from you, grabbing your left arm and planning to keep you by his side no matter what. You two start to move away from the doorway, Bob already talking with a girl that you recognize is the one he was stalking at The House of Horrors, and Ray is talking to a group of three guys off to your right.

"Where do you want to go?" Mikey yells down to you, the lights in the house instantly dimming further as the song changes. You two are doing your best not to get separated so soon.

Home! You think angrily, wishing you never came. "I don't know!" you tell Mikey, looking up at him pleadingly. "Let's just find somewhere where there's less people."

I agree. Mikey thinks, wishing he didn't concur to come. Then again he wouldn't be where he is now, right next to you.

So much for finding somewhere with less people. Everywhere you went there had to be at least ten to twenty people in the same room. Even the bathrooms were crowded! You and Mikey just tucked yourselves away in a corner in the living room, watching the raging party, both wishing you could go home.

You can't help but feel guilty though. Maybe Mikey wants to go party. He has friends, you're sure of it, but yet he's standing with you, a bored look on his face.

"You know you can go and talk to some people, I'll be fine by myself for a while." you tell Mikey, leaning closer to him.

Mikey's body instantly tingles with a thousand ripples of pleasure. Your sweet voice so close to his ear, your warm breath on his neck... God it's enough to send him spiraling into a world he never wants to leave.

He looks at you, smiles, and then slopes down and you turn your head to lend him your ear. "You said you didn't want to be alone tonight and I'm not going to abandon you."

You frown a bit, still not being able to control the feeling of guilt swelling inside of you. "But don't you have friends-"

"Alex don't worry about it." Mikey says, cutting you off. "I'm fine where I am."

You give Mikey another smile, feeling the slightest bit relieved. You look away from him after a moments time, a new tint of red on your flawless cheeks after you realized you were staring at Mikey too long. Mikey, on the other hand, does not look away. How could he tear himself from such a beautiful thing?
He can't.

I don't know.
I hope he never finds a way.
Mikey's Point of View

You and Alex have probably been talking with each for about an hour now, secluded from the rest of the party in your own little world. But you wouldn't have it any other way. You love your time with Alex and savor every moment you have with her, because you never know when it'll end. You forget all about going home, all about your brother and your friends, all about the other people around you having their own fun. No, your only concern is the wonderful girl you want to spend every minute with, her melodious laugh, her picturesque smile.

But, of course, such things are not meant to last. Around ten thirty your brother stumbles over to you two, obviously drunk, three cans of beer in his pale hands.

"Al-lex!" he says, clapping her on the back roughly. "Mike-kay!"

Gerard shoves a can of beer your way and you reluctantly take it, then hands Alex one, but she merely stares down at it, as if she's afraid to touch it. Gerard notices this and slurs out, "Whatsa matta?"

Alex smiles, but you know right off the bat it's a false one. "I'm not thirsty, thanks Gerard."

Gerard takes the beer back, tilting dangerously on the balls of his feet. His black hair is skewed all about his head, his eyes are glazed over, and he's smiling like an idiot.

My loving brother. You think sarcastically, your loose fingers still gripping the beer can.

"Whatta you two doin' all alone back here?" Gerard asks. "Come on, have some fun!"

Alex shakes her head. "I'd rather stay here."

Gerard frowns at Alex, pouting his lips a bit. "Ya sure?"

Alex nods. "Positive." she says firmly.

Your brother turns to you. "Come on Mikey, we'll go-"

"I'm staying with Alex. You go on Gee."

Gerard shrugs and whirls back around, crashing into a nearby couple who looked rather intimate, and then shouts for Frank, who you can see up ahead talking with two girls, a crooked grin on his lips.

"Does he do this a lot?" Alex suddenly asks.

You look down at her but find her gaze on your brother's back, her eyes emotionless. "Yeah." you say, not wanting to admit it.

Alex looks away from Gerard and only then do you see the tears in her eyes that she quickly hides from you by looking in the opposite direction. Your heart does a sort of double-beat and you lay a hand gently on her forearm. "Are you okay?"

Alex looks at you, her eyebrows raised in question. But that does nothing to hide the sorrow in her emerald orbs. But she merely smiles as brightly as she can at you and asks loudly, "What?"

You pause for a moment, thinking it's best not to pry Alex if she doesn't want to talk; and usually she's not very open. You can't help but feel worried though, that look in her eyes is so sad. You hate seeing anyone forlorn, especially Alex. Especially Alex. She's slowly becoming everything to you. Everything you could ever want.

But you simply lean forward and whisper into her ear, "Forget it."

...
God that's so depressing.
Why can't we both just be open with each other? I hate all this secrecy!
Your Point of View

By eleven o'clock you just want to go home. The music is hurting your ears, more people are getting drunk, couples are getting openly intimate, and you hate it all. It reminds you of that one night...

Faithful Mikey hasn't left your side, just like he promised. You two have talked the night away, well two hours of the night, and though the feeling of uncomfortableness grows within you, Mikey somewhat soothes the reaction.

Gerard, Frank, Ray, and Bob have been by numerous times this night, all drunk and sporting two or three beers, or some other form of alcohol, some more drunk than others.

"Looks like I'll be the designated driver for tonight." Mikey jokes, trying to lighten your dark mood. But it does nothing to help. And soon enough, you're fed up.

"I think I'm going to go Mikey..." you say, making sure you still have your purse.

Mikey looks startled and stands a bit straighter for he was slumped against the wall while talking with you. "Why? Are you sure?" he asks.

You nod. "Yeah, I'm tired and gotta get home anyway."

Mikey curses his brother and the others for drinking the night away. Now he can't ride home with you! "All right... I'll see you on Monday though, right?"

You give Mikey a smile and then, on impulse, lean in and give him a tight hug. "Monday." You close your eyes and breathe in the scent that makes Mikey so distinguishable from anyone else and, having to drag yourself away, give him one last smile and then turn your back to him, lightly pushing people from your path as you make it to the door. How badly you want to look back and give Mikey one last smile, but you fear if you do you'll reveal your true feelings, for you're wearing one of the biggest smiles; that and the reddest blush. But if you did turn around, you'd find Mikey in the same situation.

Still with a smile, you thankfully see the front door ahead of you, not many people blocking the way. Thank Go-

"Hey Alllllex." you hear someone say, and immediately a rough hand grasps your right arm.

Stopping abruptly, you turn to face whoever is talking to you and see someone you've never met before in your entire life looking down at you, a beer in his free hand.

"Where ya goin'?" he asks. He's about your age and has the whole jock-look down, complete with drunken haze.

"I'm leaving." you say, trying to mask your fear.

"But I'm righhhhhhht here!" the boy says, waving around his beer can with a laugh.

"Do I know you?" you ask, trying to loosen the guy's grip on your arm, but to no avail.

The guy looks hurt, though you know it's not true. "We're in the same algerrrbra class!" he states, slurring his words.

You shake your head, managing to relax his fingers a bit. "Sorry I don't-"

"Alex!" you hear someone call once more.

Dear God! You think in annoyance, looking over your shoulder to see Gerard making his way to you, a drunken girl under his free arm and a beer in his other hand.

Good it's only Gerard. You think, the boy's hand on your arm letting go as Gerard stops in front of you.

"Where ya goin'?" asks Gerard, noticing your purse hitched on your shoulder and your keys in your hand. "Where's Mikey?"

"I'm going home, and Mikey's back there...somewhere." you say, feeling guilt kick in for having left him there alone. Shit. "Why don't you go find him?"

"Good idea! See ya lata Alex!" Gerard stumbles to the left, the girl laughing along the way, and the two walk headfirst into the crowd, laughing loudly with each other.

Feeling sick and sad all at once, you quickly make your way to the front door and rip it open, stepping out into the cold, November air. You wrap your arms around your torso and keep your head down as you walk to your car, tears in your eyes.

God why does Gerard do that to himself? You think, finally reaching your Camry and unlocking it with a shaking hand. A tear manages to course it's way down your cheek and you hastily wipe it away, plopping down into the driver's seat. He shouldn't drink like that...

Holding back a muffled sob and not being able to throw the memories from your mind, you start your car and reverse out of your parking space, gunning the car as you race down the street, your sister Shannon's smiling face invading your mind.
Oh no...
...

"And the home, of the, braaaaaaaaaaaave!"

People cheer and glasses clink together as the National Anthem finishes, and you smile at your sister, knocking your glass full of Coke into Shannon's filled with Coors Light, giving her a wide smile.

It is the Fourth of July and your parents are throwing a party in your backyard in Sea Isle. Most of the people on your block, and a lot of friends of the family, are squished into your tiny backyard, the sounds of firecrackers, laughter, singing, music, and talking all filling the air. It's probably a little after ten at night and the party is still going strong, having started at four that same afternoon.

"I'll be right back Al. You want another Coke?" asks your sister after downing her beer.

You nod and finish off your drink, putting it down on a nearby table and smiling goofily at a passing couple as they raise their glasses to you and yell, "Great party!"

Though you don't like alcoholics, you don't try to stop your sister from becoming one. She loves you and respects you, but damn does she have a hard head. Trying to tell her what is right and wrong is like talking to a brick wall. So your parents just let her do what she wants and no one complains.

Soon enough Shannon returns, her long, reddish-brown hair swinging wildly behind her as she bounds in your direction, already tipsy. She's taller than you by a few inches, has a much fuller figure, but isn't really that much prettier. You love your sister, she's your best friend. You can tell her anything and she likewise, and you two spend as much time together as possible when she's home from college.

"Hey Al! Come on, let's go dance!" your sister says, handing you your Coke.

"I dunno Shan..."

"Oh come on! It'll be fun!"

You laugh as your sister grabs your free arm and drags you into the massive crowd that is swinging to the beat of 'TNT' by ACDC, pumped out by the large stereo your parents pulled outside for this event.

An hour or so races by when suddenly, your sister leans over to your sweaty body and yells loudly into your ear, "I'm gonna to get some more beer!"

You nod at her and then continue dancing, your body melting in with the others around you.

About ten minutes goes by and your sister still hasn't returned. You figure she just got caught up with some friends, and go on dancing with the people around you, having the best time of your life.

Ten more minutes pass.

Twenty.

Thirty.

Finally, forty-five minutes later, you break free from the crowd and stumble inside your house, through the thinning throngs of people.

I wonder where Shannon is? You think, having mind to ask someone. To your luck, your see her best college friend Melanie talking with a group of people up ahead. You push on forward, tapping Melanie on the shoulder to get her attention.

"Oh hey Alex!" Melanie greets with a smile. She's one of the more responsible friends Shannon has; she's not drinking.

"Hey have you seen Shannon?"

Melanie thinks for a moment. "No, I haven't. She left to get so more beer about twenty minutes ago but that's the last time I saw her."

"Do you know where she went?"

"Seaville Tavern I think."

"Okay, thanks Melanie."

You hurriedly rush into your kitchen, grab the keys to your new, but used, Camry, and then run outside; the thumping music from the backyard can be heard out front just as clear as out back.

I hope Shan's all right. You think, turning on your car and reversing out of the driveway, speeding off to the Seaville Tavern.

Halfway to the liquor store, red, blue, and white flashing lights encroach upon your vision. You slow the car, the traffic before you having done so, and crane your neck to see the problem.

Looks like an accident. You think nonchalantly after spotting an ambulance or two. You slump against your seat and let out a sigh, reaching forward to turn the radio up a little louder.

Minutes seem to creep by ever so tardily. The traffic is slowly moving forward, and the scene of the accident comes more and more into view. It seems as though there was a head on collision that caused numerous other crashes. Police vehicles dot the area, along with their officers, and you try to get a good look of what's happening as your car slowly idles on.

And that's when your heart stops.

Barely taking the time to put your car into park, you flee from your car, your breath stuck in your throat. Your heart is thumping wildly in your chest and you pay no mind of who you shove out of your path. Your legs seem to know no boundaries as you push through the crowd of people lining the street and finally break the barrier, an officer catching sight of you.

"Miss! Miss! Stop right there!"

You do not heed his warnings though. The medics carrying the gurney with your sister laying on it halt their procession when you stop by the open back doors to the ambulance, your chest heaving from the effort in which you used to get to Shannon.

"Excuse me..."

"Shannon! Shannon!" You start to shake your sister violently, tears running down your cheeks, your legs suddenly becoming jelly-like.

"Excuse me Miss but I'm going to have to ask you to stop that! This woman is in critical condition and-"

"This is my goddamn sister! You're not going to ask me to do anything!" you scream at the medic, your green eyes sparkling with fresh tears. You turn back to Shannon, who is laying on the gurney looking her worst. Bloody, bruised, dirty, and unconscious, your attempts to revive your sister are futile.

"We have to get this woman to the ER! Now!" yells a medic and in a moment, the gurney is moving again, your sister being lifted into the back of the vehicle.

"You can't-!" You ignore the cries of the medic as you climb into the back of the ambulance, taking a vacant seat by Shannon and instantly grabbing her left hand. The back doors to the ambulance slam shut and immediately medics get to work on reviving your sister. The blare of the ambulance siren wails loudly through the night as it lurches into action, racing down the cleared street.

"We've got a heartbeat!"

"I can feel a pulse!"

"Check her blood level!"

You try to block out the sounds around you. You stare down at your older sister as you clutch her deathly pale and cold hand in between your trembling ones, tears still making their way down your cheeks.

"Shannon...wake up...please..." you moan, lacing your fingers with your sister's. "Don't leave me...You're all I have..."

"We're losing her!"

Oh God... No..! You think, starting to shiver uncontrollably. No Shannon...

"Hey Shan, remember that one time when you lost mom's pearl earrings?" You say, trying to revive your sister using past memories. Two medics exchange heartbroken glances as you continue. "You were eight and I was five... You dropped them down the bathroom sink when we were playing dress-up... 'Member Shan? 'Member?"

"Quick! Give her oxygen!"

A mask is placed on Shannon's mouth, yet her eyes remain closed. You squeeze her hand harder as the heart monitor beeps crazily with Shannon's untamed heartbeat.

And finally, you can't take it anymore.

"Goddamn it Shannon why the hell did you have to drink and drive!" you screech, immediately getting looks from everyone around you. "You knew it was wrong but you did it anyway!"

A medic grabs onto your shoulders in order to calm you but you pay no regard to her.

"We need to do something fast! We're losing her!"

"I hate you Shannon! I hate you! You can't leave me!" you scream, dropping Shannon's hand, tears hurrying down your cheeks as if your life depends on it.

And then suddenly, the ambulance falls silent. The heart monitor is voicing a steady beep and Shannon's limp arm sways with the moving ambulance, hanging over the edge of the gurney. You stare at her body with wide eyes, your lower lip trembling as your own body becomes rigid.

"Shannon! No Shannon! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!" you wail, ready to fling yourself onto your sister. You're held back by a medic though, who wraps her arms around your shoulders in an effort to restrain you.

"Shannon don't leave me! Please! I'm sorry! I love you!"