A/N: The title and idea come from Christev!

"Trevor, we really need to find out what has happened to all the salmon!" declared Crookshanks. "I bet that the giant squid has corrupted one of the house-elves and the rest of us have to pay for it. You get along with the tadpoles along the shore of the Great Lake, go find out if my hunch is true!" Of course, this basically sounded like, "Miaow, mrr, prrpt!"

Trevor dutifully hopped slowly out of the castle to find out if the missing salmon had anything to do with the Giant Squid.

Crookshanks waited impatiently for his partner to return from outside, forgetting that Trevor was just not as agile or quick as a cat. He decided to sleep in a nice warm beam of sunshine while he waited.

Trevor had gotten as far as the kitchens when he overheard a conversation between Mippy, the kitchen elf, and Winky, who was serving the headmaster.

"Yes, Winky, we has removed salmon from the menu. We knows the headmaster is allergic," stated Mippy.

"Good," said Winky. "I don't wants my Master gettings sick!"

Trevor went back to Crookshanks and repeated what he had heard.

"Well, of course! It is elementary my dear Trevor. The headmaster is far more important than the Squid!" declared the self-satisfied cat. "I'm so glad I thought of going to the kitchens!" To the ignorant observer, this sounded like "Miaow, purrrr, mpht!"

"Of course," replied Trevor, "Of course." This sounded quite a bit like, "Ribbit, crroaak!"

Dean said to Hermione, "Couldn't you give your cat some calming draught? He doesn't stay still enough to sketch properly, not even in his sleep!"

"He's dreaming!" sounded the chorus from most of the rest of the Gryffindors. "He does that a lot!"

Crookshanks woke up at the noise, turned his nose and his tail up, and walked slowly up to Hermione's bedroom, not even glancing at the amused humans he left in his wake.