a/n: first off, I want to thank all of you for giving me feedback and your thoughts. I tend to babble a little too much, but I want you to know the person behind all these fics and I hope my notes give you a little inight into the girl that is taking her time to write for you (and myself of course.
As by popular consenses I will not be going back and writing a prequel chapter, but I will be adding 'flashbacks' here and there if they seem to fit.
I do really want to explore my take on how I think S4 should go and thanks to the little previews we keep getting it's looking like my theory of Kat and Caroline being there for her is completely wrong. I knew it would be, but I was just SO hoping.
Anyway, we've got less than a month till October 11th hits and you know what else that means? Halloween fic time again! I had so much fun writing Halloween fics last year that I'm honestly excited to get back into that. This year I am 99% sure that I am dressing up as Catwoman. Get it? Cuz my name is Cat? Haha (well Cathrine- but you know what I mean) In fact I'm orchestrating everyone at my work to be Batman characters and if it goes well then that night should be pretty epic! Enough from me. We're here for Delena.
SHARED DREAMS AND NIGHT THINGS
And if I was running, you'd be the one who I would be running to
And if I was crying, you would be lining the cloud that would pull me through
And if I was scared, then I would be glad to tell you and walk away
But I am not lying, I am just trying to find my way in to you
Elena rolled over, a small moan escaping her mouth as she kicked the blankets to the floor. She was cold, so cold. Even in sleep she could only remember being this cold once.
The taste of metal was in the air. Or was it that she could smell it? She could taste smells? How was that possible? Her throat felt like it was on fire; her chest felt tight as she tried to suck oxygen into it. Why was it so hard to breath? She couldn't feel anything, nothing but cold and darkness. Was it possible to feel darkness? She could remember the cold water, the dark water. She could feel her damp clothes on her body, her cold hair against the back of her neck but she couldn't move and she couldn't breathe. This was like waking up from a deep sleep, but one that held on like a noose. Part of her didn't want to wake up. Part of her wanted to stay in the deep darkness and settle away inside it.
Then air was being forced into her lungs, into her body like a harsh stabbing. Her heart lurched in her chest and she felt like she'd been slammed by a bus. She gasped, sitting up and looked around. The taste of metal in her mouth was still there, the taste of the smell. She could taste more smells now. Why were the lights so bright. They were blindingly bright. And the cold beneath her wasn't just her clothes anymore. The cold was the taste of the metal, the shiny slab she was laying on. She could hear the hum from the lights, feel the hard pounding thumps of her heart as it forced blood back through her veins. Slowly, inch my inch her body came back to life.
Back to life. Oh no.
Then she felt hands tight on her shoulders, shaking her. She opened her eyes again, blinded by the light once more. She adjusted more quickly this time and settled on Stefan before her. The first thing she saw was the relief, the love on his face. "Stefan?" she whispered and her throat burned again. How much water had she swallowed?
"I'm here Elena." He sounded so loud, so far away. How could he be both things? Was he even real? She reached up numbly, slowly. Not sure of her own body and wrapped her hands around his wrists. He felt real. He felt warm. Why had he dried off and she hadn't?
"Where is here?" she mumbled, feeling the darkness pulling her back in. "Stefan? Stefan what happened?" The last thing she heard before she fell back on the cold metal was a door banging open. Loud, but far away. It echoed in her mind. On reflex she glanced toward the sound, on guard even in death. Blue eyes, blue worried eyes. "Damon?"
"I'm here." His voice was deep, demanding. It pulled her right out of the dream, out of the memory. "Wake up Elena. It's just a nightmare."
Elena let him pull her up, she could feel the thin cotton fabric of her tshirt stuck to her sweat soaked skin. She could feel his rough hands force her damp hair back from her forehead. "It wasn't a nightmare. I was remembering."
He tensed, remembering the last time she'd remembered. It had been the only call he'd gotten from her after he and Stefan had brought her home from the hospital.
It had been twelve hours since Elena had agreed to turn. It hadn't been an easy choice for her to make, and not an easy one for him to help her go through with, but it was what had to be done. He'd watched her wipe the fresh blood from her mouth with the back of her hand, the pain and the hate in her eyes as she'd looked up at him. At first he'd thought it had been for him. That she hated him, for what he'd turned her into. Only it wasn't, she hated herself. She hurt because she was now a monster. She'd run from him, not the first time but it was the first time he'd been unable to catch her. With newborn speed and fresh blood in her system she was fast. Faster than he was.
He'd thought she would come back, that she just needed some time to get used to the idea. To adjust. But days had gone by and neither he or Stefan had heard from her. He'd called, he'd left messages. He'd even shown up at the house. Katherine had turned him away and her bedroom window had stayed closed. She didn't want to see him. She didn't want to see either of them. Then one night, around 2am his cellphone rang. He could tell from the sound of her voice that she'd been crying.
"You bastard."
"Elena, what's wrong?"
"Don't pretend that you don't know. Because I know. I know everything. I remember everything."
His heart stilled in his chest for a moment. "Everything?"
"Why didn't you save me that night Damon? Why was it Stefan that found our car? You were there. You were right there! You had to have heard the accident!"
"I didn't…I…I was already gone by then." He'd wanted to hold her, be there for her when she remembered those nights. "I left as soon as you get in the car."
"You should have stayed. You could have stayed."
"I wish I had." He knew that if he'd heard the accident he could have been there. Maybe not in Stefan's place, but he could have at least helped. He could have saved one of her parents, maybe both of them. Would he have come out that night? Would he have risked his brother seeing him to save a girl he didn't even know? "Elena, please believe me. I'd give anything to go back to that night."
"You took my memories away from me Damon! You took away my choice!"
"I know."
"And you took it away again that night you told me you loved me."
"I know."
She was silent then. She had more to say, he could tell from her breathing, but he didn't ask and she didn't go on. He knew she needed time, that's all she ever needed from him. Time to choose, time to think, time to forgive. The line went dead and he stared at his phone. Time was nothing now, not that they both had eternity.
"Tell me." He lay back against her headboard, folding her body against his in the darkness of her bedroom.
"The first time I woke up. In the morgue."
His chest tightened at the memory. "I came in just as you passed out. You called my name."
"You weren't there. You weren't there when I woke up."
"I came as fast as I could."
"I know. I know you did." She settled her head on his chest. "You thought I was dead."
"I'd just watched Ric die, again. I knew what that meant. Then Meredith told me she fed you my blood that morning. And I'm sorry but I was thankful. I was relieved. I needed you to be alive Elena. I still need you."
He slid a finger under her chin and brought it up so he could look down at her. The room was completely dark but for them it didn't matter. He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, one that was simple but spoke volumes. She could feel the guilt in it, the gratitude, the relief. The love. He did love her, there were no doubts. "And I need you."
Her hands slid up under his shirt, her skin desperate to feel his. She didn't wonder until that moment what he was doing there, in her room. She didn't invite him over, he was just there. When she needed him. "I'm sorry I snuck in." he whispered, pulling back from the second kiss. "I had to see you."
"It's okay. I'm glad you're here."
Her fingertips grazed over his stomach, drawing along the lines of muscle and up. He felt the fabric of his shirt pull and move with her as her hands searched more of his body. He closed his eyes, let her explore. Her lips were on his neck; sucking and then biting. Her hands were smooth and gentle on his skin, then she was dragging her nails along his chest and down. Her body was soft next to his, then suddenly she was on top of him, completely against him. He opened his mouth to gasp and tasted her tongue, tasted her. Her fingers were in his hair, tugging and pulling his face everywhich way so she could devour him. More, she wanted more. She wanted to feel alive, feel crazy and Damon gave her that. He gave her that and more.
"What are you doing Elena?"
"I'm choosing you." She whispered, her hand tight around his collar and he could hear the strain on the fabric. Then she'd ripped open his shirt and he nearly flinched. Goodbye John Vervatos.
Damon sat straight up in bed, his hands fisted in his sheets. He could have torn them to shreds in frustration. A dream! It had all been a fucking dream!
With a curse he threw the blanket off and stalked over to the bedroom door, flinging it open. He'd managed to rid himself of dreaming about Elena for a while now. Why? Why had the erotic dreams come back? He didn't care about being quiet, about not waking Stefan. He stomped down to the den and straight to the bar cart. When he had a drink in his hand he moved over to the fire, the burning alcohol soothing his nerves. He jabbed the sleeping logs once harshly, and the calmly stoked the fire back to warmth. Even as a boy, making a fire, watching it spark and grow calmed in. In the army he'd done the same thing and when he'd returned home from the war, the nights when Katherine refused him or he knew she was with Stefan he would go hide in the library and watch the flames.
Fire was life. Fire was passion.
And that dream sure had been both.
Elena punched her pillow in frustration. Not that she'd wanted the nightmare or anything, but the almost sex dream of Damon was not going to make her date with Stefan any easier. She groaned and pushed herself up, knowing that going back to sleep was going to be impossible. She peeled off her sweaty clothes and threw on a robe from the back of her door instead. Blood, that's what she needed. Carefully, she creeped down the stairs, hoping not to wake up the other women. The last thing she needed was explaining to them why she was awake. Grabbing a glass from the cupboard she tried to shake the real feeling she'd felt when she'd dreamt of kissing Damon.
It had felt real, like one of the most vivid dream she wasn't sure if she'd imagined or remembered. Like a long lost memory. But her compulsion had long since worn off and there was nothing else Damon had to hide. And yet, there was just something different about that dream. She leaned against the island in the kitchen, slowly sipping the blood and looking out the window. The sky was black, hardly any stars and sighed. Was it wrong of her to wish that Damon had been there to wake her up from her nightmare? Was it silly if she called him right now to ask him about dreams? Surely he would want to know what kind of dream she'd had.
It didn't seem like vampires had more lifelike dreams than humans. It was just this one. One that she wished she hadn't woken up from.
Upstairs, Katherine snuggled back into her bed, a sleepy smile on her face. It was even to get into Stefan's head, a little tougher to get in Damon's and up until Elena had turned she couldn't get into her doppelgangers at all. However, Elena had Damon's blood in her and would always share that connection with her. And there was always a back door through the mind.
a/n: hope you all enjoyed that little taste of action. I promise there will be more coming. I just thought we all deserved a little something and I had a few minutes to write. I'll be back soon with the final few chapters of this story.
