HOLIDAYS AT THE BURROW.

I was struck ill a few days before the holidays began and for two days, I was stuck in my bed, reading books and listening to music. On the second day, Max flew to the window and sat on my bed, dropping an envelope in my hand. I sat up and opened it, and smiled.

Dear Darcy,

Emily tells me you're sick. Meet me right outside the Gryffindor portrait hole tonight at eleven thirty.

Professor Lupin

I smiled wide and stuffed the letter underneath my bed so no one would see.

At eleven thirty exactly, I wrapped a sheet around my shoulders and snuck down to the common room, where the fire was still going. I opened the portrait hole and the Fat Lady smiled at me and held the door open for a few minutes. Professor Lupin was already waiting outside for me, a cup of steaming tea in his hands.

"I thought it'd help," he said, handing it to me with a smile. "It's green tea. I hear it's good for you when you're sick."

"Oh, thank you, green tea is my favorite," I said warmly. "Wow, thanks, sir."

Lupin nodded. "Before I go," he paused and cleared his throat. "Um – what are your plans for the holidays? Are you er – are you going somewhere? Or staying here?"

I smiled wider. "I think I'm going to the Burrow, just like last year," I hesitated. "Mr. and Mrs. Weasley love you – Professor, come with me."

Lupin's mouth dropped a little and he stuttered. "I couldn't possibly –"

"Please?" I pleaded and he smiled.

"Okay."

"Great. I'll write the Weasleys as soon as I get upstairs. Goodnight, Professor."

"Night, love."

Three Days Later…

"Are you coming back to our house for Christmas?" Ron asked me as I stuffed some pudding into my mouth. I nodded. "You know what's weird? Mum wrote me earlier today saying that she invited Professor Lupin."

"Really?" I asked and Hermione looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Speak of the devil…" Ron said, pointing towards Lupin. He was walking towards the giant doors of the Great Hall, walking with a limp. It seemed like he was trying to hide it, but I could tell he was in pain. He looked to his left and our eyes met for a brief moment. There were fresh cuts on his face. When he left the Great Hall, I waited a minute or two and then wiped my mouth.

"I have to go to the bathroom," I said, but it sounded more like a question. The three stared at me, but I got up anyway and headed towards the doors, opening them and closing them behind me. Professor Snape watched me leave. I ran down the hallway. "Professor Lupin?"

I ran to the end of the hallway and turned the corner. Professor Lupin was leaning up against a wall, his eyes closed.

"Professor Lupin," I said and I ran up to him. He opened his eyes and smiled weakly. "You should be sitting down. Or resting."

Lupin nodded. "Yes, yes," he pointed to a broom closet across the hall. "Let's go in there. I don't want anyone to see us and suspect something's going on."

"What?"

"You know what I'm talking about, Darcy," Lupin said and he wrapped his arm around my shoulders, limping over towards the door. I opened up the closet door and then shut it. Lupin sat down and sighed. I knelt down beside him.

"I hate seeing you like this," I said quietly. I didn't mean for him to hear it, but he did anyway and he flashed me a small smile.

He looked up into my green eyes. "I'm fine," he said.

"No, you're not," I insisted and I reached out, but then put my arm back down. I summoned up the courage again and reached out and touched his face gingerly, running my thumb over his scars and cuts. Touching them didn't seem to bother him, but he was a man and I assumed he could cover up his pain quite well.

"Darcy, I'm sorry, but I doubt you could help heal me up," he said, still smiling and looking at me. "I'll have Madam Pomfrey help me. Just give me a second to get up."

"What happened?"

Professor Lupin's happy look turned into a serious one, but he never looked away.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked," I looked away and sat beside him, distancing myself from him a little bit. I didn't want to sit too close to him and make it seem like I was desperate and I certainly didn't want to be too upfront about my feelings for him.

"I don't want you to worry about me," said Lupin quietly. "Because I'm fine. I'm worried about you. I'm terrified that I'm going to hurt you."

"You aren't going to hurt me! And even if you did, I wouldn't care!" I stood up and started pacing around in the small broom closet. "I wouldn't care at all, actually."

Lupin smiled and watched me pace. "I wish I wasn't – well – what I am," he told me, his voice hushed. "Or, I wish you didn't know."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want you to be afraid of me," he breathed. I stopped moving and kneeled down in front of him. His eyebrows raised and I licked my lips, looking right into his eyes.

"Professor Lupin, for the last time, I am not afraid of you. I will never be afraid of you. I never will be."

"You lie."

"I wouldn't lie to you, sir."

At the Burrow…

After arriving at the Weasley's, I took a well needed three hour nap. I woke up and grabbed a big coat and a hat and gloves, and then walked into the kitchen, where Lupin was drinking tea. I jumped. "You're finally awake," he grinned. "Where are you going?"

"I was just going to go for a walk," I shrugged.

Lupin jumped to his feet. "I couldn't possibly let you go out by yourself with Sirius Black on the loose," he said, grabbing his coat. "Let me go with you." I smiled and then he opened the front door for me, closing it after him. "How come you aren't with Harry and Ron and Hermione?"

"I guess I'd rather spend time with you," I said very quietly.

"What's that?" he asked, looking at me. I knew he heard me.

"Nothing," I replied quickly. We walked into a small field and he found a large rock to sit on. I climbed up a small tree and sat on a thick, sturdy branch. He smiled up at me. "What would you do if this branch broke and I fell?" My voice echoed and I swung my dangling legs back and forth. I wasn't that high off the ground, only about five or six feet.

"I'd have to save you, yeah?" he answered, looking up. "Although, the snow would probably break your fall."

I decided to make this a game. I smirked to myself. "And what if I was so high up in the tree that I would die if I hit the ground?"

"I'd catch you."

"What if we weren't together for the holidays? What if I had come without you?"

"I'd be a bit disappointed and rather lonely."

I breathed in. "What if I was a – a – you know – a –"

"What if you were like me?" he asked seriously and he looked up at me. I nodded slowly. "You don't want to be like me, Darcy. No one wants to be like me."

"I do," I said, slipping down from the tree branch. I stood in front of him. His eyes were piercing mine and I simply shrugged. "I really do."

"Why the hell would you even think about that?" he asked and gave me a dumbfounded look.

I frowned. "So you wouldn't have to be so worried about me."

"Darcy, if you were – like me – I'd be even more worried about you!" he exclaimed. "Not only would I have to worry about me hurting you, but I'd be worried about you hurting you! I don't want you to be hurt at all! It kills me, Darcy."

I was speechless. "Professor Lupin…"

"If you think I'm going to turn you into a werewolf, then you're sadly mistaken. I would never," he breathed, touching my arms. "And don't bring it up again. I worry about you, Darcy. I care about you." He stood up from the rock he was sitting on.

His arms folded around my body and I got closer to him, hugging him around his neck. I placed my head on his chest and I closed my eyes. Lupin brushed the hair out of my face and kissed the small part of my forehead that wasn't covered by my hat. I felt my whole body got hot and I looked away.

I looked around. We were so deep in the field that no one would be able to spy on us. I stood on my tip toes, staring into his eyes and licking my lips. His arms were still wrapped tightly around me and I swallowed the lump in my throat. Slowly, gently, and shyly, I kissed the corner of his mouth, trying to see if he'd kiss me back. To my disappointment, he didn't, but he allowed me to kiss him.

I pulled away and we stared at each other. He looked sadly down at me. "It's getting cold out," he stated quietly, closing his eyes. I stepped backwards and we let go of each other. "We should be getting back – I don't want you getting sick."

I nodded and he walked beside me, our bodies brushing against each other. I got tired of being teased, so I stepped away, placing a good amount of distance between us.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked politely. I shook my head, stuffing my hands in my pockets. I ignored him and looked the other way. "What – Darcy, why are you ignoring me?" he asked, stepping closer to me, but I took another step away.

I stepped forward so he was following me.

"Darcy, what is going on? Why are you so pissed off at me all of a sudden?"

Still no answer.

"Darcy? Answer me, Darcy."

Still nothing.

"Darcy Potter."

Don't crack, don't crack, don't crack.

Finally, Professor Lupin grabbed my arm and spun me around. "Darcy, what did I do? I haven't done anything to upset you!"

"It's nothing!" I replied, turning away from him. He caught me again and held me tightly with both hands. I looked down to the ground. When he pulled me closer to him, I listened to his heartbeat.

"Don't take it the wrong way, Darcy," Professor Lupin whispered, resting his chin on top of my head. "Don't think I'm teasing you, because I'm not, I swear!"

I didn't say anything. I didn't want him to think he had me all figured out.

"But you don't realize all the factors going into this! If anyone figures out we're having… inappropriate relations, I'll be fired! We can't have that, Darcy. If we're going to do that, then we'll have to wait until the end of the year, love…"

When I didn't answer, he sighed heavily.

"Darcy, there's so many things that are wrong with this," he began. "There's the whole fact that I'm your professor and I'm far – I'm much too old for you, and I'm – I'm – well, you know what I am."

I still didn't respond to him, I just hugged him tightly.

Finally, Lupin touched my chin gently and lifted my face so I would look at him. "But I suppose," he sighed. "Rules are meant to be broken."

And he leaned in a kissed me.

The Next Morning…

I woke up the next morning to the smell of breakfast being made. I let out a soft moan and rolled over, trying to get comfortable again and fall back asleep. I felt someone sit on my bed and I felt the pressure beside me. I grabbed my wand from the bedside table and pressed it to the person's neck.

I realized it was only Professor Lupin. I smiled and he took my hand in his, lowering my wand. I blushed, realizing I was sleeping in a very revealing tank top. I covered my chest with my blanket. "You should be more careful about what you sleep in when you're in a house full of guys," he grinned. "You never know which one of them would want to watch you sleep."

"What about you?" I said. "You just snuck in here to watch me sleep." I kind of wanted to be able to wake up to him every morning. It was nice seeing his face first thing in the morning.

"Breakfast is ready. You're the last one awake," he told me, standing up. He gave me a reassuring smile and part of me ached. I desperately wanted him to kiss me again, but I doubted that he would. I licked my lips and chewed the inside of my cheek as he looked at me thoughtfully. "I'm going to go change into some real clothes. I'll be down in a few seconds."

As he left the bedroom, I jumped off the bed and grabbed the Invisibility Cloak from my trunk. I wrapped it around me and opened the door, shutting it quietly behind me as I stepped into the hallway. I quickly moved out of the way as Ron walked past me. I followed Lupin upstairs into the guest room. I wanted to know what he thought about me – it was killing me. When he opened his door, he walked slowly into the room and I moved as close to him as possible so I could sneak in behind him.

He shut the door and his hand just barely grazed my cloak. He froze, looking around. I held my breath and he reached out, grabbing the cloak and tearing it off me, smiling widely. "Invisibility Cloak," he laughed. "This was your father's."

I wrapped my arms around me and looked away, embarrassed.

"I'm not mad, you know."

"Sorry, I'll leave," I said.

"You must be really lonely that you have to talk to me in your spare time," he sighed and I looked at him, my eyebrows raised. I wasn't sure if it was an insult or not.

"I'm not lonely! What's wrong with just wanting to spend time with you?" I protested, stamping my foot like a child. "What's wrong with that?"

"There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. It's just… I'm me and – and you're you."

"What does that mean?"

"Darcy, we've been over this before. The student-teacher relationship, the age factor, and my huge problem," he sighed. "Don't you have friends that are normal and your age in school?"

I stared at him for a moment and then looked away, my cheeks turning a bright shade of red. I did have friends, but it was the fact that he thought I was crazy for wanting to spend time with him – that embarrassed me. "Do you not want to spend time with me?" I asked. "If you thought this was wrong, you wouldn't have come here! You wouldn't have kissed me and you wouldn't have looked at me like you do and led me on like you did –"

"Please come here," he begged and I stood still. He held out his finger and beckoned me closer.

I did as he told me and he sat on the edge of his bed. He was almost as tall as me when he sat and I stood. Lupin put his hands on my shoulders and ran his fingers down my arms. He then wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him; my heart was racing and my hands trembled as I ran my fingers through his hair.

He traced my spine with his fingers and my toes curled as he tucked some of my hair behind my ear. He held me out in front of him, caressing my cheek with his calloused thumb. I felt my face burn up in embarrassment as he stood up, towering over me. Lupin bent down, his lips only centimeters from mine. I didn't even close my eyes – I wasn't expecting him to kiss me.

I breathed in slowly and stared at his lips. He began to say something, but there was a knock on the door and he pushed me away immediately. I grabbed the Invisibility Cloak. Mrs. Weasley spoke. "Remus? Have you seen Darcy? Hurry on down to breakfast – it'll get cold."