It was the park they went to, and Sue's happy intake of breath at seeing such 'wild' greenery was enough to tell Lilina she had made the right choice. Well, that and the fact that hardly anyone came here.
The park had been a hunting reserve at one point, but none of the lords of late had cared much for the sport. At least as far as Lilina had been told. Certainly much of the meat on her tables came from here, and certainly there was a bit of poaching among the servants to help out family members who didn't have cushy castle jobs, but there were no more great hunting parties, and hadn't been in decades.
Instead, Lord Hector had given control of the park to Lady Lyndis, who had turned it from a slightly wild 'tame' forest into something hardier and more sustainable, and something a great deal prettier too. Something that just felt right in a way that cultivated land never did.
"You can come here whenever you want," Lilina said. "It's safe to ride too, at least as safe as anywhere is."
"I will," Sue said. "I didn't realize there was such a nice place here."
"Mother did it," said Lilina. "She spent a lot of free time here." They meandered through the park side-by-side. There was plenty of space to cover – the park was no mean, scraggly patch of trees. It was large enough that it supported plenty of deer and boar, in addition to smaller forest dwellers.
"It's a good place to come listen," Sue said. "Nature's voice is very strong here. To have a place to be close to mother earth and father sky, well, any Sacaen would want that."
"Even Lycians need it," Lilina said. It did seem easier to breath out here, for all that the trunks of oak, elm, and ash pushed just as closely as the castle walls, and their interlacing branches formed a ceiling nearly as solid as the castle roof. "I should have come out here before, to clear my head. I've just been so angry lately. I don't like it but I can't seem to make it go away."
"Because of Roy?" Sue asked. She finally settled down on a fallen tree trunk and Lilina fell into place beside her, not at all concerned that it might ruin her dress.
"He started it, the other lords finished it." Lilina could not keep the bitterness out of her voice, and didn't even try. Sue was safe to talk to – she wasn't involved in politics, had no strong ties to any other region but Sacae. "They're trying to turn Ostia into a dog – collared and controlled and Etruria's hand on the leash!" She dug her fingers into the trunk, and bits of bark and moss crumbled under her grip. "And General Cecilia! As if I should be batting my eyeslashes and saying 'you're my hero Lord Roy!' like some simpering moron. And she scolds me as if I'm a child throwing a tantrum. Ha!" Lilina pulled her hands away from the trunk with difficulty and rested them on her lap instead, tangling her fingers in her skirt. "Ostia won't end with me, I swear it by St Elimine, aye, and by mother earth and father sky too! She's my charge, my birthright, my legacy, and I'll restore her to her place if it kills me."
"The arrow that does for rabbit won't do for elk," Sue said, in Sacaen.
The proverb took Lilina by surprise even more than the shift in tone, or language. "Ah…mother used to say that too," she said.
"Yes, the people of Sacae are very wise." Even Sue couldn't keep a straight face for that. First, she smiled – an expression just as subdued as the rest of her, but no less nice. Then she laughed a little and suddenly they were both laughing – a touch hysterically, but real laughter.
Lilina couldn't remember the last time she'd laughed like that, laughed so much she was wiping tears from her eyes as she stopped. She felt lighter, as if some invisible load had been lessened. "I won't tangle with the other lords without being prepared," she promised. "And there's still Bern and Etruria to consider, before I can do much of anything at all."
Sue was rubbing at her eyes as well. "Still, I admire you, Lilina. If I was half the warrior you are…"
"What happened? In Sacae?" Lilina's tragedy was plain enough, she couldn't have hidden her losses if she wanted to. But Sacae was far away, and Sue was so private a person, and Lilina only had a faint idea of what had transpired.
Sue stared at the ground as if willing it to talk for her, and sighed. "The clans of Sacae took a stand against Bern, all but one. Those traitors attacked us, along with Bernese troops they'd given access to the plains." She scowled. "A hunter I am but a warrior? I was sent with the other women and children, only to find that we'd ridden into a trap. I did what I could but in the end…all I could do was flee with nothing more but my horse and my bow. Lord Orun gave me safe lodging, until he was murdered."
Lilina did not want to give Sue an empty 'I'm sorry' like the ones given to her, and she couldn't say nothing. "Bern has a lot of lives to answer for," she said, instead. "Lives lost and lives ruined. But that kind of greed can't possibly stay locked up quietly behind those mountains. And the next time they cause trouble…"
"I won't run, this time," Sue said. "Some of my people might still be alive, or captured. Vengeance solves nothing and violence solves little, but I'll rebuild my home too, however I must."
"I'll help, if there's anything I can do."
Sue nodded, and silence fell between them, for once not awkward but comfortable. It was nice to sit outside on a beautiful day and listen to birdsong and watch the ever-changing patterns of sun and shadow as the light changed. It was nice to do those things with a friend, and even that thought thrilled Lilina just a little bit. She was not a girl with many friends, perhaps none outside of Roy, and now Sue.
But the light was changing, and it was nearly time for dinner. She stood up and shook her skirt to free it from the bits of moss and wood she had scattered liberally around.
"We should get back. Until I find a new seneschal, I don't have much free time." She offered Sue a hand, which was accepted, and pulled the other girl to her feet.
"Seneschal?"
"A lord's right hand, someone who takes care of the little details. Father's seneschal, Lady Marian, was a treasure, but Leygance saw to her during his coup." Lilina set off back towards the castle, but she couldn't help moving slowly still, unwilling for this brief respite to end. "I'll need to have one found and trained before I can think of joining forces with Roy again." She sighed. "And tomorrow I need to ride out and start making rounds of the tenant farmers outside the city proper, and I need to check on Bors and his new guard recruits, and talk with the housekeeper and the butler about filling any servant positions that need filling." She stopped there, even though the list went on and on. Her father had tried to prepare her to rule, but the amount of work still took her by surprise. Where, in this wave of minutiae, would she find time to fight Bern or the other Lycian lords?
"Can I help?" Sue asked. "Leading here is more complicated than doing so in Sacae, but if I need to regather my clan it's something I must continue to learn."
Lilina paused as they neared the gated wall that separated the park from the rest of the castle estate. The sun was setting behind the park, throwing long, twisted shadows from the wall and gate across the perfectly manicured lawn. A good representation of how she felt – as soon as they crossed that threshold she was Lady Ostia again, with all the responsibilities and problems of the country firmly on her shoulders once more.
Lilina had always known who she was, what she was destined for, and she had wanted it. But she'd never wanted it like this. Never wanted to claim it from death and despair. Even so Ostia was hers, and it needed care and keeping. She pushed the gate open.
"I can't refuse any offer of help right now," she told Sue. "I'm sure we can find something that will be useful for both of us. And…well, we do have one of the best training arenas in all Lycia. Perhaps we can spar together sometime? We have to keep up on that as well."
Sue smiled her elusive smile again, and closed the gate behind her. "I'd like that, very much."
