Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter!

Chapter 7: My brain is not to understand Sirius Black!


Revlium Thoughtatium Quatiatius Notebooksats Follocundus Diaranius!

Dear Paige,

We sat in the library peacefully, looking up useful spells and conversing properly with each other without yelling, arguing, fussing, complaining, hair-pulling, or punching. Everything is just hugs and kisses with a shiny, beautiful blaring in the background. Any minute now, a cliché song will be bursting from the two main characters; their duet filled with joy and passion. No one whispering behind our backs about us being attention-whores. The whole scene was shiny and clean.

I freaking wish! That hypothetical scenario would only happen in opposite land. Paige, please, buy me a ticket to get away from him!

Sirius is being a whiny baby! (What else is new?) He flumped himself on the floor outside the library doors, verbally refusing to step in that "hell hole that seduces innocent souls" with his legs locked together and arms crossed stubbornly.

He is such a man-child!

Die...Die...Die...

"Sirius Black, get the hell up!" I screeched.

"No," he said stubbornly. I kicked his side. Moaning in agony, he clutched his side.

"Ow! What the bloody hell was that for, White?"

"For being a douche bag."

He glared.

"Why do we have to go in there?" he said crossly, glaring at the doors with a deep hatred.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe to find the spell that binds are hands together," I pointed out sweetly. He jumped up quickly.

"That's what I thought," I smiled smugly.

He rolled his eyes, following behind me into the library.


Revlium Thoughtatium Quatiatius Notebooksats Follocundus Diaranius!

"Oooohhh, I think I found something, pumpkin," Sirius teased.

I rolled my eyes, resisting the urge to slap him across the face.

He has taken a liking to calling me "pumpkin."

"Probably some porn, dog breath," I teased back. He snorted.

Leaning over his shoulder, I stared at the foreign text with utter concentration.

I am semi-fluent in Latin.

My mother, Dr. Bernadette White, got her doctorates in Linguistics. She taught me a lot of used and dead languages, including Latin. My father, Dr. Geoffrey White, got his PhD in Medieval Literature. I grew up thinking, writing, and exploring new languages.

He glanced sideways at me, realizing how close our heads were together; eventually, he looked down at the Latin spell book with a small smile.

Sighing, I blushed.

The sexual tension that has been building between us in the last five hours has been killing me!

I learned something new today: Hot, stuffy room + hormones + handsome boy + sexually frustrated girl = sexual tension.

It's not rocket science as the muggles say.

He might deny it, or dare not to acknowledge the situation, but believe me when I say, I most certainly am aware of the sexual tension, Paige.

I need something to drink. When I mean drink, I mean some hard liquor. It is astonishing that I have never been drunk in my life. Somehow, I know how fifty ways to smuggle liquor into Hogwarts. I blame it on my Irish genes.

"The...linking...of...the...hands...shall...be...released...by...powerful...mental...powers," he said confidently with a wolfish grin on his face.

I stared at him for a full second before hitting him upside the head.

"Ow!"

"Idiot! This is not time for games, Black. Here is the spell apparently," I said irritably, pointing to a rather long and hard pronunciation of the spell. This will take a couple minutes to translate and pronounce correctly. I could get it done in five minutes.

I skimmed the introductory paragraph written in Latin.

The Handlock Curse is a spell for a quarreling couple to cease fire and learn to corporate. This spell is to be oversaw from a third party, particularly a woman that sympathizes with the couple in question; therefore, a woman—also share her sentiments—shall have the last words for the quarreling couple. Practice the words for they are easily able to mix up the wording. Incidentally, this spell will be lost in the pages. Copy this spell down for after you say the words with a wand, this page will disappear, for there is no longer need for it.

Whipping out his wand quickly, Sirius cried, "Dimitte his contumacem amatores quoniam ipsi didicero documentum. Et solvere absque manibus corpus pertinent."

Realizing he mispronounced a bunch of words and he was a male, my body stiffened as a pile of dust exploded in our faces.

"Idiot!" I screamed, throwing my hands in the air. I scrambled over to the book, flipping back to the page with the curse.

"That spell needs 100% concentration, dumb nut. And you completely screwed it up!"

I stopped talking when I noticed my hands were both free. Tears of joy sprung in my eyes as I twisted my left wrist several times. Holy shizznit, I am free of the antichrist.

"You were saying, White," Sirius said smugly.

"Shut up!" Don't ruin my mood!" I laughed happily. "I am in such an excellent mood that I could kiss you!"

Cricket. Cricket. Cricket.

"Hypothetically speaking, that if I had a huge crush on you, of course, which I don't, by the way." I coughed into my hand, shifting my eyes to the ground. We both laughed awkwardly.

"Well, it was nice while it lasted." Black did his signature look: a half-smirk, half-smile.

"Great storied to tell our grandchildren someday," I blurted out unthinkingly.

Seeing his amused face, I slapped my forehead.

"Not our grandchildren. I mean mine and yours. Oh, you know, what I mean!" I flushed.

"Not only do you like me and want to kiss me, but you also want to mother my children." Sirius grinned cheekily.

Ignoring him, I speed walked to the door to stop embarrassing myself further. Only the most horrible thing occurred. My recently joyous mood was replaced with a furious temper.

The spell was a dud.

The spell was a dud!

THE SPELL WAS A DUD!

MOTHER!

#%^*)&$%%^$^&&()&*&$%#^%&^&*&(^(^$%^$&*^*()&*(^^$^&$*

(Paige, the words I used were so graphic that I thought it best to censor them.)

When I walked twenty inches away from Black, this vivid, vibrant, and visible green chain slid around our wrists securely and tightly.

Dread filling my stomach, I knew our fate was intertwined a bit longer.

Suddenly, the chain yanked him forward; ultimately, a heavy, muscled, two hundred-and-forty pound dude to crush a hundred-and-fifty-three pound girl aka me.

"I am going to kill you, Sirius Orion Black!" I seethed, flipping him on his back as my hand sought his pride and joy, his stupid hair.

"Not the hair! Anything but my prized appearance!" he pleaded desperately, his large hands covering my tiny wrists.

"Shut up!" I hissed into his ear, pressing harder into his body. "You are going to regret saying the spell!"

"Oh, I am so scared of a girl," he laughed sarcastically.

"You should be when I burn you alive," I snarled, both of my thighs pushing firmly into his hips as I gripped his hair harder.

He looked at me with a slyly before rolling us over, him riding on top of me. I felt his wand poking into my abdomen. Weird. I thought it was on the table. I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see his wand knocked on the floor. Knitting my eyebrows in confusion, I thought, what is poking my stomach...Oh my God...I flushed in realization.

His smirk widened at my red face.

"Sweetheart, I wouldn't play with fire," he whispered huskily in my ear.

Taking in a deep and shuddering breath, I felt his eyelashes fluttering against my cheekbones.

"I won't be the one burning alive," I retorted breathlessly.

"Stubborn woman," he chuckled, pressing a kiss on the corner of my jaw.

Smirking, he stared down at me with his intense, cool grey eyes that I stared back just as coolly. His eyes flickered down at my eyes to my lips and I waited in anticipation. When he leaned closer to me, my breath hitched.

I knew what to expect as his shoulders hunched over and his lips hovered an inch away from mine. His hands cradled my cheeks gently as if he would break me.

I puckered my lips, feeling his lips hover without touching.

My first real kiss—not that short and innocent kiss in daycare—was going to be taken by Sirius Black.

"Awhem!"

Sirius and I jumped up embarrassedly and quickly separated. Slightly out of breath, we avoided each other's eyes and shifted uncomfortably.

Remus Lupin stared at us, amusedly and knowingly, while filing his papers into his leather bag.

"Am I am interrupting something, Virgo and Sirius?" he questioned.

"No!" I yelled.

"Yes!" Sirius yelled.

We glanced at each other and began to explain at the same time.

"Well, you see, I dropped my book—"

"And being the good wizard I am, I helped White—"

"—pick up the book for me. Klutzy me—"

"—fell right on top of me. I flipped us over—"

"—because I was telling Black about this article I read. If you get someone to stretch your thigh muscles—"

"—you can lose weight. Who would a thunk it?"

Slightly out of breath and sweating like a pig, I blushed furiously.

Black chanced a glance at me, turning a little pink in the cheeks and scratching the back of his neck sheepishly, when we caught each other's eyes.

Lupin looked at his best friend then to me multiple times before bursting into loud, obnoxious laughter.

"So, Moony, how can I help you today?" Black asked sarcastically.

"By making by day brighter," he said, uncharacteristically smirking. "Get believable alibis," he cackled as he strutted out of the library.

We stood in silence for several minutes.

I gazed at a particularly interesting patter on the wall. Those swirls are sure beautiful...

"Never happened?"

"Never happened."

We walked to lunch to the Great Hall in an excruciatingly painful silence.

Staring at my feet, I ignored the stupid butterflies fluttering in my stomach. Fly away, butterflies!

It never happened, Virgo White. And you will do well to remember that.


Revlium Thoughtatium Quatiatius Notebooksats Follocundus Diaranius!

Sirius and I huffed angrily.

For the past five minutes, we have been ridiculed for messing up the spell.

"This is too bloody funny!" James guffawed.

"How could you mess up a simple spell, Black?" Lily sniggered. Alice cackled.

Under the table, I stomped hard on Sirius's foot. He screeched in pain.

"Thank you so much, Sirius," I said through gritted teeth.

"You are very welcome, Virgo," he replied sardonically.

When Remus began to laugh, I placed my head apologetically on Sirius's shoulder. Under the table, he slipped his hand into my palm and I squeezed his fingers.

We sighed simultaneously while listening to their entertained sniggers.


Authors Note: "Release these stubborn lovers for they shall have learned the lesson. Unbind the hands and they shall be free of physical state." That is the spell done in Latin. I don't know if it is correctly translated since I used Google translate.

I am so sorry for not updating. I haven't had the urge to write in the longest time. But recently, my best friend gave me inspiration. So, Bryanna Luna, this is for you! I love you! Thank you!

Update: I have recently reedited every chapter, which I have added some more plot development, so I would recommend rereading if you want.


Edited: 2 March 2014