Leaving the Past Behind.
Chapter 7: Change
I was supposed to post this yesterday but I completely forgot! haha I'm really sorry. Thanks for the reviews again and please enjoy this chapter :).
Sakura wasn't surprised to find Sasuke asleep when she got home later that evening. He over did it she mused whilst closing the beige curtains in her bedroom. Before leaving the room though, Sakura looked over at Sasuke's calm sleeping form. His face looked peaceful and of course, extremely handsome. That hadn't changed. Feeling an unpleasant tug in her chest, Sakura closed the door quietly and went to her bathroom to shower.
Sensing that Sakura spent one too many minutes looking at him before leaving, Sasuke realised all these things he had been feeling since he'd been reunited with his old team-mate were just too overwhelming. He didn't want to acknowledge them and he didn't want to feel so god damn confused all the time. Staying around Sakura was just too hard. He knew he was just going to re-open old wounds on the poor girl but he was far too selfish to let that stop him. A pang of guilt hit him unexpectedly making him want to cry out in anger. This is why I need to leave! He thought.
Sasuke could hear the sounds of the shower and decided it would have to be now or never. Dressing in a pair of loose fit trousers and a dark jumper, all from the hospital, Sasuke made his way over to the large wooden window. He figured this would be for the best. Being around each other only brought weird feelings and, in Sakura's case, heart ache.
Drawing back the curtains, Sasuke silently opened the window and jumped out stealthily. He had no idea where he would go from here but that was never a problem for Sasuke. He always was better off alone. He was doing Sakura a favour really. With him gone she could pay more attention to her patients.
As Sasuke started walking, it began to rain. Ignoring the cold and his now wet clothes, Sasuke tried to walk as fast as he could without causing any distress to his head wound.
When Sakura got out the shower and changed, she realised she needed something from her dresser. When she found her bedroom empty with the window wide open, Sakura didn't even think about what she was doing as she ran to the window and jumped out.
Sasuke should have expected her to come after him. As he sensed her coming towards him, he cursed that he couldn't have gotten away faster. So he stopped and turned around. Sakura was a few metres away from him dressed only in a large t-shirt and shorts, her feet bare. He expected her to get angry, to scream and shout and maybe even hit him. Instead, she just stood there and stared at him. Neither of them said anything. Her silence made Sasuke feel even guiltier.
"I know what you're thinking." She said finally, "That I'm going to throw a big tantrum and beg you to stay."
Sasuke sore her tremble, from the cold, or him, he didn't know.
"But I'm not." She protested angrily. "I just came to say goodbye."
With that, she turned back towards her little cottage and walked away.
She was right, she had known what he was thinking. He had not expected her to walk away like that. He was expecting a scene and a dramatic goodbye like last time. No, this time was different. Her voice echoed resentment and not desperation. Sasuke didn't know what, whether it was because she was his old team-mate or that she was just maybe, probably, the only person that cared about him still, that made him do what he did next.
"Sakura wait." He called before catching up with her.
Sakura's heart skipped several beats when she heard him call her name. Determined not to show him how much his almost departure had almost broken her, she slowed down but said nothing as he caught up with her.
"I'll stay." He said quietly.
Sakura didn't say anything. As they walked back in silence, the rain soaking them both, Sakura felt a weight lift off of her.
The next few days were slightly weird for Sakura. Between resting, Sasuke would come to the medic tents to help out. He would do the simple, albeit annoying, jobs like taking the rubbish to the village scrapyard and bringing medicine and medical utensils to Sakura when she needed them. She wasn't ungrateful, she appreciated the help very much. It was just so weird. He would always stay silent but help her out when she wanted him to. He had always been the selfish type, doing things only that would benefit himself, but not anymore apparently. Sakura had the feeling that something was going on in his head but she didn't know what. One thing was sure though, she didn't trust him.
It was only now that Sasuke was starting to care that he was interested in why Sakura had left Konoha. What was she doing so far from her hometown? As much as he was curious, he didn't want to ask her about it. He felt that by helping her at the medic tents put his unwanted feelings at bay. But never completely. There were always the feelings of guilt and regret. Though he didn't want to admit this out loud, he had decided that he would wipe the slate clean. Get rid of all the bad and start over. He still wasn't sure what had made him decide this but it wasn't without reluctance at first. He may have made his final decision but he still found it hard to stick to sometimes. It was his nature to get out of situations that were unnecessary to him. To not get into something if it didn't benefit himself in some way. Since he'd finally killed his brother it was as if Sasuke's life no longer held any meaning. He was so confused and felt the same solitary feelings he had felt as a young boy (Among many other feelings). But he was tired. Fighting back all these feelings and all the things he'd done that he knows now that he shouldn't have. These thoughts exhausted Sasuke to no end. But somehow, being around Sakura made it easier? He couldn't say why, but he was grateful for whatever it was she was subconsciously doing that helped him get through this odd period. Again, he hadn't completely changed though. He was far too proud to tell Sakura of these thoughts and feelings. He didn't think he would ever be able to. But one day, he hoped maybe he would be able to repay her. Maybe.
"You're healing well." Sakura said a few days after Sasuke's almost departure.
Sakura's hands were gently wrapped around the back of Sasuke's neck, holding his head straight so she could examine the wound. Her breath tickled Sasuke as she turned his head from side to side, sending involuntary goose bumps all the way down Sasuke's spine. He felt very tense then, Sakura's hands around his neck, and her breath doing weird things to his body. Clenching his eyes shut, he focused on trying to stay calm. Unexpectedly, Sakura moved her hands down to rest them on his shoulders whilst she still looked at his injury. The movement sent small shocks of electricity throughout his body, almost causing him to sigh.
What is going on? Sasuke thought. He barely recognised his body these days. Feeling all these weird emotions, and now this?
"Okay we're done." Sakura said cheerfully, heading to the sink where she removed her gloves and washed her hands.
"Thanks." He said quietly and headed for the sofa.
Later that night, Sasuke felt that same shock of electricity as Sakura taught him how to cook. She'd been showing him how to dice onions and when he had done it wrong, she placed her hand on his to show him. Again, he had not been expecting it and almost cut his finger off.
"Are you okay?" Sakura asked, confused.
"I'm fine." He said more harshly than he had intended.
They carried on in silence. This time, Sakura took extra care not to touch him. She figured he wasn't used to being touched and that she should probably refrain from doing so in the future. When they had finished cooking and had eaten their food Sasuke insisted on washing up whilst Sakura showered. Grateful for his sudden change of attitude Sakura went to shower.
By the time she was done Sasuke had washed and dried all the dirty dishes and was sat down watching TV.
"Thank you for that." She said as she sat down next to him.
"Can I ask you something?" Sasuke asked, avoiding her gaze.
"Sure." She replied.
"Why did you leave Konoha?" He asked after a moment's hesitation.
Sakura sighed. She hadn't expected him to ask her that. Considering their current fragile relationship, Sakura decided she would lie.
"I came here on a mission. I liked it so much that I decided to stay." She hoped that he would not notice her fake smile.
"Right." He said, dropping the subject.
Sasuke knew she was lying. For some reason this made him angry and again Sasuke found himself wondering just what was his mind doing to him. He wished that her lie hadn't made him feel this way. Normally this sort of thing wouldn't have bothered him. Now he was more curious than ever to learn why she had left Konoha. But he kept his mouth shut, not sure on how to confront her. It would be awkward and he couldn't deal with that right then. Instead, he said goodnight and went to bed.
Sakura breathed a sigh of relief when Sasuke went to bed. She worried that he might have asked her more questions and she wouldn't have known how to answer them. She tried not to lie in most situations if she could help it, she would only lie if it was completely necessary.
After giving it much thought Sakura came to the conclusion that Sasuke was better off not knowing. He would only think she was weak if he knew. She didn't want that and so she would not tell him.
Suddenly Sakura felt her eyes begin to sting and a familiar pain in her chest. Deciding it better to go outside Sakura sat on the step that led to her front door. She missed Naruto and the old Sasuke. She missed Kakashi and being team 7. She just wanted it all back.
