You'd never been to Papyrus and Sans' house before. Even you had to admit, it looked pretty nice. From where you were standing at least. The house was actually pretty large with two full floors. Somehow you doubted either of the skeletons had a hand in building their own house though. It looked too normal. Neither of them were capable of doing that. Papyrus was too weird and Sans… wouldn't even lift a finger to help. Though knowing what he was capable of doing to you, maybe he wouldn't even have to move to build a whole house. Gravity powers were probably really useful for someone as lazy as Sans.

"AH, HUMAN! YOU ARE HERE FOR OUR DATE, RIGHT?" Papyrus asked as Frisk walked up to him. You winced. You still weren't used to his loudness. It was like he was shouting and talking normally at the same time. You wondered if there was a way to stop him from doing that. Well, besides killing him. Frisk wasn't going to let you.

They nodded, and Papyrus' face lit up. Or at least you were pretty sure. Even as expressive as he was, you doubted a skeleton could really make some expressions. But the feeling got across. "ALRIGHT THEN! NOW I WILL TAKE YOU SOMEWHERE SPECIAL FOR OUR DATE. HMM…. AHA! I KNOW JUST THE PLACE!" And at once, he was off. You and Frisk were both startled by him bolting off like that, but Frisk was quickly chasing after skeleton. You got dragged along of course. With a body that was shorter than his legs, they had a hard time keeping up as Papyrus trudged through the snow. They almost fell a few times.

After a few moments, you were pretty sure you knew where Papyrus was headed: Grillby's. It was the only interesting place in town as far as you knew. The library and Inn were the only other places of interest. The Snowed Inn got boring after 13 seconds and the library had like, one 2 page essay from a school per shelf. Snowdin was boring these days. But at least Grillby's had food. As far as you knew. You and Frisk had never stayed long.

However, Papyrus turned on his heels halfway there and started walk-running in the opposite direction. This threw you off completely, and you stared in confusion as he raced back toward his own home.

"I say we ditch him." You suggested.

"We're on a date, Chara. Don't be rude," Frisk replied as they chased after him. You got the feeling they were having fun already. For whatever reason. You could only get the faint feeling, not the reason. Whatever. It's not like either of them make sense.

"HERE WE ARE!" Papyrus announced. "THE MOST SPECIAL PLACE I COULD THINK OF." You were once again standing at the front door of the skeleton brothers' house. Papyrus held the door open as Frisk waltzed inside.

"This is stupid in every conceivable way," you muttered darkly. And then, you were yanked along by some cruel force that wanted to punish you for some reason.


An annoying music filled your head as you entered the room. It reminded you of Sans, obviously. It was his house after all. And the inside definitely showed it. Along with the odd tune, there was a ton of random stuff about. You decided to let Frisk do their thing and look around, and Papyrus seemed to be doing the same as he stood off by the far wall near the stairs.

The first thing Frisk went to was the rock on the table. "Are those… sprinkles?" You asked, filled with confusion. Frisk poked at it. Nothing happend. "No really! Why is this rock just covered in sprinkles?"

"AH, I SEE YOU'VE FOUND SANS' PET ROCK. HE ALWAYS NEGLECTS IT, SO IT FALLS TO ME, PAPYRUS, TO TAKE CARE OF IT."

"Why. Is. It. Covered. In. Sprinkles!?" You shouted, punctuating every word with a swing of your arms. "This is not proper pet rock feeding!"

Next came the stand by the couch. There was a heavy-looking book laying on top of it. The cover read "Quantum Physics for Dummies and Lazy People." It obviously wasn't Papyrus', even if he did fit the intended audience.

Frisk opened it up before you could stop them. But instead of pages of text, you saw all of the pages were hollowed out. In their place, a joke book. Both of you narrowed your eyes. Frisk opened that book. Inside was a quantum physics book, in a similar hollowed crevasse.

"He's defacing perfectly good books," you muttered darkly. Once again, they opened the quantum physics book. As expected, there was a joke book waiting within. You and Frisk both decided it was time to stop.

"I never knew puns could be so… meta…." Frisk said bewildered. Since when did they know how to use "meta"?

They didn't walk far before discovering the next area of interest: the couch. Frankly, you didn't want to go anywhere near it. It was a gross shade of green, and looked like it had been through its fair share of various stains. It even smelled weird. But never one to question anything, Frisk plunged their hand straight between the cushions. You felt sickened just seeing it. "Frisk what the he-"

"I found 30 gold."

You went silent as they pulled out 3 large gold coins. "The world just adjusts itself to fit your weirdness, doesn't it?" you asked after a moment.

Frisk grinned. "Yeah, probably."

Next (unfortunately, as far as you were concerned), Frisk found a sock, just lying on the ground near the TV. It was covered in post-it notes. You didn't have to read more than the first few containing back and forth bantering to know what they were all about. Why was Sans such an ass?

Finally, it was off to the kitchen. Frisk wanted to check out the fridge first, but you already knew what was in there: an ungodly amount of poison spaghetti. Papyrus' hunger was insatiable when it came to that stuff. Could he even eat it? Probably not. Either way, you were more interested in the impossibly large sink before you. And not large as in wide. Large as in much taller than even Asgore would need. How was anyone supposed to wash their hands in that?

"ARE YOU IMPRESSED BY MY BUILDING PROWESS, HUMAN?" Papyrus said from behind Frisk. You jumped in surprise. You hadn't even noticed him come up behind you! Why were monsters so stealthy? It was creepy. "I MADE IT SUPER TALL SO I'D HAVE MORE ROOM TO HIDE MY BONES." And as if on cue, the cabinet swung open. All three of you turned in surprise. Underneath the sink was an almost completely empty space. All that remained was a single white dog chewing on a bone.

Realization came over everyone in the room at once. Papyrus shouted, Annoying Dog's eyes went wide, and Frisk stepped out of the way. "YOU STUPID DOG! STOP STEALING MY BONES!"

At once, Annoying Dog fled the room, still gnawing on his stolen bone. It shot past Frisk and yourself before running around Papyrus and out the door.

The room went silent for a few seconds as everyone processed what had just happened. You were technically the one to break it. "Was that door open the whole time?"

"~Doot doot doooooot~" you suddenly heard. The unmistakable sound of that weird slidey trumpet thing whose name you could never remember. And yet, you and Papyrus knew exactly who was playing such a thing in such a mocking tone.

"SANS!" Papyrus shouted. "STOP PLAGUING MY LIFE WITH INCIDENTAL MUSIC!"

"The story of my life…." you muttered darkly.

"OKAY," Papyrus suddenly said, his loud voice suddenly shocking you out of your annoyance. He sure switched gears fast. "ARE YOU READY TO GO INTO MY ROOM AND…" You gasped in shock. His expression was not unlike that of an anime school-girl saying something she wasn't supposed to. He even covered most of his facial bones. "... DO WHATEVER IT IS PEOPLE ON DATES DO IN THEIR ROOMS?"

Your expression was deadpan. You were a kid, and yet you were the only one who knew exactly what happens on dates. And that this was the dumbest thing that had ever happened in the history of forever. "Since when did I become the adult here?" You groaned.


A/N: Sorry this took so long to write guys. I had the motivation but no inspiration. I just couldn't type this until a few days ago. Really, I'm sorry. Writer's block just hit me hard. But on a lighter note, I'll almost definitely be back to updating semi-regularly from now on. Until next time!