Some People Keep Ritarding
It was the Tuesday after the band's spring trip. This year, they had gone to Corpus Christi for a weekend to randomly have fun. Oh, and for a clinic to help them with their UIL music. Lately, Concert 1 has had a major issue with one of their songs, "Variations on Scarborough Fair." As soon as they slipped into a two-measure ritard, the percussion (namely, the bells and the piano, but mostly the bells) couldn't seem to find the tempo, throwing off the flute and sax soloists and generally making the normally pretty lullaby-like tune sound horrid.
Mr. Oakley looked over the clinicians' notes and narrowed his options for the cause of this tempo discrepancy: the height of the bells and the bell player not watching the baton.
He turned in his chair on the podium towards the bell player. "Here's exactly what the clinician said: 'Your bell player's like 6' 9" and the bells look like they're at his knees. Think that might be the problem, Luke?" Luke shrugged and adjusted the bell set's height while the band chuckled.
"Another issue that might be the cause," Mr. Oakley continued, "Once I get to measure twelve, that's the tempo I'm staying at."
"Ohhh." Luke nodded. "Okay. See, I thought you going to keep slowing down until measure thirteen ..."
"Ah. You thought I was ritarding more." At this, the band roared with laughter.
Mr. Oakley turned the Concert 1, frowning sheepishly. "You know what I mean," he said curtly.
