*sigh* I really, really try hard to keep the tone lighthearted and cheery, but I guess it's time to get serious.
A couple of weeks ago, someone gave me the idea to write about Jacob and Evie's father and his treatment towards Jacob. At first, I was excited, but then I thought about it. How would Evie explain it? How would she feel? I had no idea how the topic would even be presented. Recently, I have the answer.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you "If There Was More Time".
PS, I have not read the novels, so if I get something wrong, let's just say it's my headcanon and I'm an idiot.
Evie sat waiting on Big Ben. The crisp air of night stung her exposed face, mostly her ears. Her cape flapped slightly in the wind behind her shoulder blade. The gauntlet she wore felt tighter than ever on her hand to her elbow. Her usually calm heart was beating with nervousty overcoming her rational thinking.
Her heart was constricted and hollow in her chest. The wind wisped past her as she crouched on the rooftop, concealed in shadows. She didn't even try to hide the fact she was stressed and hungry. What would anyone else expect from her staying up there for almost two days, only leaving to get water and food.
Evie hadn't gone back to the train since those two days. It was too much for her to go back now, too painful for her soul to take in at one time. Besides, how could she face her brother, how could she even begin to apologize? All that and more haunting questions filled her head with grim thoughts.
She couldn't take it anymore. Too much was going on inside of her. So many emotions of hopelessness and despair swelled within, consuming her with grief. It started to spread, pricking in her eyes, nose, and mouth. Soon, she couldn't fight back the sadness, but gave in completely to it's unpleasant hold. Evie laid on the dirty ground on the balcony, tucked up her knees, and began to cry.
"Jacob...I'm sorry." she repeated over and over. Her hand brushed over the metal casing of her gauntlet, her fingers skimmed over the dried blood that she had drawn. No words could describe the amount of guilt and fear she had been harboring over what she had just done. Nothing on this Earth could convince her to forgive herself for the trouble she had caused.
"How could you, Jacob? You went to a brothel, ran into a Templar, and assassinated him in front of the whole bloody group of women and patrons? How daft are you!?"
Jacob threw his hands up, frustrated and defeated at his sister's constant lecturing. "He was about to hurt one of the women. What was I supposed to do? Watch him kill her and let him walk away?"
Evie seethed, unable to control her rage now, she got up from her chair and shouted at her brother who was slumped onto the couch. "You could've been at least a bit more tactful you brainless tit!"
Her twin had snapped as well, getting to his feet and standing at full height. His face was only centimeters from her own, but just as furious. "If I'm brainless, that makes you a fool who can't even decide what she want's to do with her life." His voice then became mocking as he raised the pitch immensely to imitate a female's. "Oh, I'm Evie Frye. I'm loyal and smart, but I can't make my own life choices worth a damn!" he spat, venom poisoning the joke with malice.
"Stop it, Jacob."
"What about when we were kids? You were always the favorite. Always following the rules, conforming to the Creed, kissing up to George in Crawley. All for what? To chase after some mythical fairy tale!"
"The Pieces of Eden are no laughing matter!"
"And what about Greenie? When are you going to stop denying that you love him? We all know-"
"Now listen here Jacob Frye-!"
"NO! No more listening! No more commands! Just because you were father's favorite, doesn't mean you can boss me around like you're my mother!"
"I wasn't! He loved us both equally!"
"That's a lousy excuse, and you know it Evie! You were always his favorite, I was just his disappointment. The black sheep of the great Frye family line! It was always about you-"
The eldest Frye had enough of him mocking her. Evie cracked her knuckles and hurled a punch at his smug, yet enraged face. He didn't dodge in time and received a metal packed strike to his left cheek. The second one that followed hit him square under the jaw, this time without the added force of her gauntlet.
Jacob fell to the floor without a single yell, clutching his injury and curling into a feeble ball. "Leave me alone. You only make things-" Evie choked on her words when she heard muffled sniffles .
He was crying.
It wasn't loud, or ugly sobbing of men and women she had to kill, a last ditch attempt for their lives to continue. Not the silent crocodile tears that she had come to expect from his joking nature, but real crying. It was subtle and almost unhearable to any normal person. The sound was caught up in his hands that covered himself from her sight, making it sound softer than she knew it was.
It was loud enough for her though. Her mind was sent reeling and her pulse spiked. Her gauntlet fist felt wet. When she looked, she found that blood was seeping into the protective glove and stained the steel shell. Her blood ran cold at the sight at the liquid, freezing her in place.
"W-what...what have I done?"
Before her mind had a say, Evie ran out of the car and took to the streets of London.
"Had he always felt this way?" she asked herself, wrapped up in the memory that was tonight's terror of her mind. The scene was played over and over again, sinking her deeper into depression.
"The Black Sheep"
"Disappointment"
"Father's favorite"
All of these words he used to describe their father's feelings towards his children. Evie had known her whole life that she was the talented and most worthy successor to the bloodline of Frye assassins. Vigilant, patient, precise, strong, and intelligence beyond her years. She followed orders without fail, never deviated from the mission, and above all, had a not once let her emotions get the better of her. Some of the higher members of the Creed talked of her being their replacement when the time came for them to join their brother's and sister's in another life.
Jacob on the other hand...he was less than the Creed's standards. Always getting into fights, almost always compromised missions, and couldn't keep his act together. Father was always much harsher on him. Her brother was always scolded, always berated...
...always second best to her.
It destroyed Evie when she realized this. She could deny it all she wanted, but there was no hiding the truth from her. Jacob was different, he wasn't like the other assassins. he couldn't stop his true colors from showing underneath his short lived patience.
She was too tired, she didn't want to stay awake any more. Evie decided to quit and let her body slip into a cold sleep. Maybe the dipping temperatures would help harden her back up. What harm could one night outside do to her?
As she began to lose her grip on the real world, she thought back to a moment when she saw her brother in a different light for the very first time. It was a fine spring morning, their second year with their mentor, George, in Crawley.
Dawn was beginning to break of the horizon of the train yard. Evie stood atop on of the cattle cars, watching as the sun peered up and kissed the earth with its warm rays. She didn't cover her eye, but faced it head on without even blinking once. Just as she had always done for her whole life, she was waiting contently for the action to start.
Someone joined at her side, she could sense them before they approached with her Eagle Vision. It had become a sixth, automatic sense to her in the years she had been training to be the best assassin of her class.
"Up again, Evie?"
Her sense didn't fail her, it was her overseer, George. She smiled and stretched her palms to the brightening sky.
"Did you expect anything less?" she teased, letting a yawn loose from her mouth. Her new companion chuckled and rested his hands on his belt.
"Your training has been coming along quite quickly. Soon enough, you'll find yourself with some children of your own to mentor."
"God bless them, whoever they are. I won't make it easy on them...just like father."
She could sense George stiffen slightly at the mention of his ill friend. He shoved his hands into his pockets and stared passively off in the distance.
"That's not true."
Evie was confused. Her father had pushed her to the limits of her talent. Everyday was filled with constant striving to be better than the last. It was always one more mile she could run without stopping, one more punch before she passed out, and one more push up she could do. She could never take a break without being assaulted into another mock sparring lesson. And how could she forget the time she was locked in her room and wasn't let out until she dismantled her gauntlet a hundred times. She was only a child then.
"What do you mean it's not true? He always pushed me harder than most. He always expected me to succeed at everything."
George sighed and motioned with his head for Evie to follow him for a walk on the tracks. She went along, listening to every word.
"Do you remember your mother, Evie?"
"No, she died while giving birth to us. I wish I could meet her." she admitted, wringing her hands nervously.
The man sighed and let a ghost of a smile on his face. "She was a lovely lady. Not fit for the life of the Creed, but still tough as nails." he said, a far off expression replacing his grin. "Your father used to always go to her window and climb inside her parents house to be with her until the sun came up. A few years, and they snuck out to go drinking, swimming, and some other 'adult' activities."
"Reminds me of something Jacob would do." Evie thought. Her mentor continued, leading them out of the train yard and to the town.
"One day, her parents found out about the nightly courting and arranged a marriage for her. The boy was rich, proper, and not an air of danger about him. The perfect gentlemen."
"What did father do?"
George scoffed and threw his hands in the air. "The bloody fool didn't do a thing! Cecliy ran away to be with the poor bastard!"
"Really?"
"Really. You should've seen the look on Ethan's face when she came up the path to his parents mansion with a stupid grin written all over her." he said, obviously recalling the memory in his mind. She could imagine it too. A pretty young woman walking towards her family home, beaming sunshine as she approached her dumbstruck father.
"Father must've been so happy."
"You bet he was. He got on his knee a week later and they were married without a second thought. In only a few months, they found out they were having you."
Evie couldn't help but let her joy show. It was a little hobby of her's, but she enjoyed happy endings when it came to love. It didn't matter what kind, she always wished for the best in her heart. There was just something very charming about the topic.
Of course, her happiness was short lived when she remembered the tragic conclusion to the story.
"What happened next?" she asked, more somber than before.
"Eight months into her pregnancy, something went wrong. She went into labor while your father was away on business. She thought was only having you, but then..."
"Jacob."
"Yes, the nurse who helped her told her that there was still one left. The last push was what caused complications. There was no doctor, no midwife, no one who could prevent the death of your mother."
The air turned sour, even with the freshness of morning dew clinging to the building and signs, there was no right way to handle the hole in Evie's heart.
"I...I know..."
"It's okay to be sad, even if you never knew her."
"Yes...I understand. I still don't understand why father isn't as harsh as I think when it came to my training."
George softened, walking slower to take in the daylight. Children and women began walking the streets to go about the their business. Men walked with ladies on their arms, or in groups of their own gender to work.
"Jacob has her eyes. Cecily's were a darker shade of green, but he still has the same determination that she had."
"He does?"
George pointed a gloved finger to emphasize his claim. "You can bet a Piece of Eden he does. He also inherited her spirit, thirst for danger, not to mention her pension for violin."
"I don't think that's how it works." Evie said, her eyes squinting with scepticism. He insisted though. "Where do you think your father got the violin, he played it himself. Ethan can't play to save his goddamn life."
Evie let a chuckle escape her lungs. Her seriousness set back in when she realized George still didn't answer her question.
"George, I still can't understand what Jacob has to do with all this."
He just kept walking, head facing forward and not looking back. His hand reached to flip up his hood, and Evie did the same, following him to an alley way to free run to the roof tops.
"I can't tell you everything. You're a clever young lady, just like your father." As they reached the top of the roof and began to start a morning warm up, he threw under his breath on last comment.
"You love people like him, too. Tough, but deep down you're just a child who needs to stop blaming everything on yourself."
The sun was just beginning to ascend into the sky when Evie woke up. Her bones were chilled to the core, protesting for warmth. She fought back, raising from her concrete bed. Big Ben was about to strike six tolls, a perfect time to wake up and start the day.
Evie rubbed the sleep from her eyes and took a lung full of morning air. She brushed the light frost from her jacket as she stood up. Looking below her perch, she saw that the guards were switching, so she could slip by unnoticed into the other boroughs.
After meeting the ground and stealing a carriage, she thought she would pay Alex a visit. He was leaving for a trip to America soon and might need help packing some of his inventions to take along. Who knows how many weigh enough to crush him? Only God knew the answer to that question.
She reached his home, but sadly found he was out. She opted to ditch her ride and wonder about London, dipping her head to any Rook or friend of the gang as they walked by. The day was still young and a good book and Agitha's good cooking was tempting. It might not be so bad to just go home and apologize to Jacob. He may forgive her after three days of cool down. Maybe Henry was around and willing to go on an adventure.
No, it wasn't time yet. After that fight, she didn't think she could ever go back. Knowing Jacob, he might make things worse and pick right up where they left off. There was no doubt that Mr. Green knew about the spat. He wasn't one to tolerate violence, especially between family. Who knows how mad he'll be.
What he never forgave her? What if he was happy that she was gone? Without her, he didn't need anyone nagging at him to not do this and that. Jacob could live his life as he please. Evie's pace picked up as her heart beat faster and faster. Breathing became harder to control and the sides of her vision were blurring. Death, loneliness, and guilt gnawed at her insides.
She was tired.
Tired of being perfect, tired of being the big sister, tired of being useless as her brother's only family left.
Evie stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, somehow she had found herself near a busy intersection. The world of London was fully awake and moving. People moved about their affairs, unaware of the storm that raged inside her. All the noise of feet, wheels, and hooves on cobblestone faded as her world started to become filled with anxiety. She tried desperately to cling to some type of sanity, anything to keep her tethered. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes, stinging and burning in her lids.
"Someone help me!" she whispered, clutching her head.
A sudden scream ripped through the air. Evie halted, her breath stopping. She forced herself to look up and see what was happening. People came running down one of the intersections, putting traffic at a standstill. Evie threw her head in the direction that the people were running from. Smoke was billowing into the air.
"Oh no." she whispered, taking off in the direction of the smoke.
Reaching the destination, she found that a house had caught fire. Pedestrians were running from their homes, trying to flee before their own houses were caught in the blaze. Evie ran over to see if anyone needed help, but the police had roped off the main building and prevented any bystanders from entering the area.
One woman was arguing with a policeman who was holding her back.
"You must go back!" she cried aloud as Evie approached. "There's someone still in there!" She recognized this woman who was being pushed away by the line of officers. It was Ms. Smith, Annie's nanny. The nanny was distraught by the time she had reached her and began to sway as if she were about to faint.
"Ms. Smith!" Evie exclaimed, getting a grip on the fainting woman. The older woman fell into Evie's arms and leaned on her for support. "Who are you, Miss?" she asked with frightened tears in her eyes.
"My name is Evie Frye, I'm Jacob's sister." she said, holding Ms. Smith as she sank to her knees in defeat. As soon as she wiped her tears away she grabbed the collar of Evie's shirt and gave her a shake.
"The police won't let me go back! Annie's still in there!" Annie, the little girl that was Marie's daughter. The woman's whole world, and the closest thing Jacob had to a child of his own. The girl's nanny then went back to hysterical sobbing, letting go of Evie. "Save her...p-please."
Evie had gotten the green light. She got up from a kneeling position and took off for the burning house. The line of police noticed who she was and didn't stop her as she went straight for the door. The flames were licking at the windows, trying to get her. Quickly, she did a quick sweep of the levels and found a small form in a room. She raised her gauntlet and shoot for a broken window on the second floor closest to the person. She reached it within a moment, tucking and rolling into the fire.
The air was thick with smoke, choking her in it's hot embrace. A sweat broke out on her neck and forehead in the unbearable temperature. She had to ignore that though, she wouldn't have much time left once the fire reach the lower floors and ate away the support beams. Some of the upper carpet was already singed and revealing the wood being burned away next.
Evie surged into the fray, covering her mouth and nose with her sleeve. It didn't help in the least as she went straight for the nearest door to search that room. Her eagle vision was focused on the small form of a child hunched away in a corner. It must be Annie. The door itself was wide open, exposing her to a room that was beginning to burn on one end while another was caked in black smoke. Evie decided to chance it and uncover her mouth to scream into the smog.
"Annie!" she yelled at the top of her lungs. Her insides were rewarded with a gulp of the black death from the fire. Her cough racked her entire body, shaking her to the core. Her throat seared with agony, feeling dry and barren. She would kill of a drink of water to cleanse her system of the awful draught she was forced to endure.
"I'm here!" A tiny voice called, coming from the small lump that was straight ahead. Evie rushed in, her coughing increasing as the heat rose in the room. She peered behind a couch, and there was Annie in her brown dress, covering her head and tears in her eyes.
When the blonde looked up and saw Evie though, she smiled while she cried. "Are you an angel?" The young woman scoffed and ripped off her heavy jacket. She quickly slung it over the girl's shoulders then picked her up in her arms. "No, just someone who wants to help."
Annie nodded and clung to Evie's neck. The child shook as she buried her face in the older one's neck to keep the smoke away. The girl would be safe if she kept still while Evie moved around. The Frye was only clothes in a simple, white button up with a vest for protection. If Evie was hit by a flaming object, then it was all over.
Evie leaped out of the room, the floor creaking at the weight of the two. The flames were more intense and grew larger in size. The small hall was now a dangerous spot. The window that Evie used to get in was blocked by a fallen, ablaze beam. There was no way the two were getting out the way she came in.
The brunette swept Annie away, making a break for the stairs. Each step was perilous and tricky. Sometimes, a flame would try to tickle Evie's boots, sending fear up her spine. The child clung for dear life, trusting the assassin the whole trip down.
The down stairs was no better. Flames had eaten the entire area. Paintings melted from the swelter. Rugs were charred black and the beams began to crack. The door down here was also blocked by a wall of burning wood that had fallen from it's position. There was no hope of escape from here.
Evie sprinted back up the stairs, her eagle vision growing dimmer and dimmer. The smoke was taking affect, and soon she would be a tar filled corpse. Annie couldn't make it out on her own strength. There was only one exit she could find.
The rooftop.
The climb was a huge blotch on her memory. Nothing made sense except that the crackling was now ringing in her ears. The strange part was, her brother popped into her head.
The first day they came to London and he borrowed Mr. Green's carriage.
"Who's a good horse? You are!"
The excited look on his face as he announced his master plan to start the Rooks.
"And we'll call ourselves...the Rooks!"
"You were never good at chess either."
And finally, as she reached to final level, the last thing she heard before a beam fell on her back and pinned her and Annie to the ground with no hope of escape was her brother's concluding words to her.
"That's a lousy excuse, and you know it Evie! You were always his favorite, I was just his disappointment. The black sheep of the great Frye family line! It was always about you!"
At that moment, as the embers scolded her skin and the pitiful screams of the helpless girl she tried desperately to defend echoed in her head, she realized it.
Jacob and father, her and Jacob. Jacob was like their mother. He was too much like her. Her father was distraught, so he took it out on Jacob. All the pain, all the suffering, but also all the love. Evie saw it all too often. Their father could've had him expelled from the Creed, cast out from that world.
But he fought to keep his son by his side. He never once destroyed him, never once ever cast a blind eye. He trained up his son and watched him grow with his twin.
As cruel as it may seem, there was no way that Jacob would have been with his family without that push. If father hadn't been tough, Jacob could be anywhere but here in London.
Evie's brain was falling apart. The pain on her back ceased and her body shut down. The sound of flames licking at her were all but background noise. It was only here and the frightened sobs of Annie below. Evie accepted that death was looming on the horizon.
But she wasn't taking Annie to Hell with her.
She made the daring decision to quickly roll off of Annie. Once she was on her back and the column free from Evie's body began to fall, she thrusted her arms out to keep it from making the full descent. The embers dug into her hands, but she had to ignore the pain for the little girl's sake. Once the beam was secured in her hands, she dragged her feet out from a pile of rubble and reared them up to meet the wood. With a mighty kick, she hefted the column away with a yell of effort.
The beam rolled away, sending sparks flying across the room. Evie resecured Annie in her arms and followed the path the beam had fallen from, the roof. There was a gaping hole where it fell, leaving Evie to just use her gauntlet and escape swiftly. The smoke rushed up and out of the same hole they used to make their getaway, clouding the assassin's vision. Her sixth sense was failing, her surroundings shifting back to reality.
It felt longer than a few seconds, but she broke the cloud and landed on the next roof with Annie clutched to her chest. The two unhooked and splayed out on the panels. Evie could feel her lungs staining to draw air. When the sair did come in, it stung her burned throat, making her body ache all over.
She knew that she had inhaled too much smoke. If she didn't get medical attention soon, she would die.
Evie would die.
The very thought was funny to the woman. She had always planned to die in battle at an older age. It seemed like the perfect and most honorable end for a person of her caliber. Nothing less would be a stain on her pride. But this death was more than enough. She could pass on knowing that Annie was going home.
Part of her wished that she could make things up with Jacob one last time.
The bells of the fire constable pounded in her head. People screamed that there were victims on the adjacent roof who needed help. There was a charcoal smell that hung in the sky, flushed out by the cleaner air that overpowered the stench. Lazy clouds floated above, puffy and white with endless promise. They were so soft looking, Evie felt if she could reach far enough, she could use them as pillows. Tiny hands shook her shoulders, begging her to get up.
The begging, the bells, and screams died and all that was left was her eyes starting to close. The blue of the daytime sky was a beacon of happiness in the now darkening world. Tears began to fall silently from her blue eyes.
Before the black consumed her, she heard familiar voices and felt something pick her up and carried her away, but it was too late.
Her body went limp, her breath coming to halt.
