I'm still doing some research for the chapter on Amalia's birth because I don't know much about births in the 50s. I'm slowly working my way through some journal articles because I want it to be as accurate as I can be. But it might get a little historically inaccurate because some of what I'm reading is a kind of terrible and I don't know if I can write Peggy going through that. For the time, I'm kind of thinking of splitting the difference. I think he might not be there for Amalia's but won't be able to stand it again and insist on being their for his son's. I think a chapter with him in the waiting room with his friends could be a cute chapter, but I also want to write a chapter with him there.

The inspiration for this chapter (drabble really) came about when I was watching the kiss for the millionth time on Youtube (that's a healthy thing to do, right?) and someone in the comments pointed something out. In the scene when she is talking to Jarvis, she has red lipstick on. However when we see her with Sousa, it has magically disappeared, as if she was anticipating kissing someone and didn't want it to get smeared. Sneaky woman.

Peggy stared at the woman facing her in the mirror. Could that really be her? It couldn't be, because she was pretty certain the woman looking at her was thinking of kissing Daniel Sousa. That person certainly couldn't be Peggy Carter.

But as she looked at the woman in front of her as she tried to calm her breathing, she knew it was true. And why shouldn't it be? It had been quite obvious to both of them (and anyone who glanced their way) they had feelings for each other. So why shouldn't she march in that office and do what she should have done in that van?

"Because everyone around you dies," She muttered to herself in the mirror.

But as much as she missed all those who she had lost, in her heart she knew the statement wasn't exactly fair. Colleen had been the truly innocent bystander, killed for no other reason than a cold and being Peggy's roommate. The others, as painful as their losses were, knew what they had signed up for. Steve, Michael and Chief Dooley had been no fools. Still, Peggy couldn't help but feel she should have been able to do more to save their lives.

But she couldn't do it. She couldn't go into that office, kiss that sweet man and bring any more danger into his life than he already possessed.

But she loved him. Heaven help her heart, she loved Daniel Sousa. She loved that gentle laugh, that dopey smile and the way he looked at her and the butterflies that would start in her stomach when he did. They had been through so much and all she wanted in the world was to be safely in his arms.

Then get in there and do it, she told herself. Since when is Peggy Carter scared?

Maybe just maybe, Peggy admitted to herself, she wasn't scared to walk into that room because she was worried about Daniel's safety. Maybe what she was really scared of was if Daniel didn't want to kiss her back.

And why should he? Yes, the poor soul was clearly in love with her, but that didn't mean he forgave her. It didn't mean his feelings surely hadn't been hurt when she had turned him down for that drink. It didn't mean he had grown tired of waiting for her. Maybe what she should do was turn around, walk out that building door and get on the plane headed to New York with Thompson.

And then she thought of Steve.

She thought of that moment as she cried into the radio, begging him to stay with her. She thought of the missed chances they had and what could have been.

So maybe it would go terribly. Maybe Daniel, as sweet as that man was, would curse her for being so foolish to think he wanted her too. Maybe the whole thing would be a bloody mess.

So be it, she told herself as she marched to grab a paper towel, so be it. She was not going to let another good man not know how she felt about him. She was not going to let another chance at happiness pass her by.

So with careful accuracy but determination, she wiped off the lipstick on her mouth, and she inspected her work after she was done. There was a slight stain to her lips but it was going to have to do.

She took one more moment to gather her courage when she heard the door open behind her.

"Oh, hey Peg!" Rose said looking surprised. "I thought you were heading back to New York already."

"I had one more thing, uh," Peggy stammered, "One more thing to take care of."

"Maybe I'll catch you on your way out," Rose smiled as Peggy quickly walked out the bathroom door.

Rose hadn't missed the distinct lack of red lipstick on Peggy's lips. She quickly opened the bathroom door and walked carefully back to hallway. Carefully, she peaked around the corner in time to see Peggy walk into Chief Sousa's office.

About time.

Hope you liked it!