So, I have a lot of explaining to do, don't I? Well, long story short- because I don't want to make too many excuses- I moved five states away from home, am having a few relationship problems (obvs if I moved without my husband), and am looking for a job. It's a lot. Plus, this last flashback hated my guts. And I was enormously sad over the end of the season(series, for me) / closing of the BL S&S at fanforum. Those girls have my heart.
A little warning, there's an LP flashback that none of you are going to like but it is SO important to the story. I really hope the last two scenes (the BL flashback and in real time) make up for it. I did my best to perfect it. The little Naley snippet in there is dedicated to Molly(read over by Tori- thanks babe). Thanks to her and Adrienne for reading over the LP scene for me. And thanks to Tanya for continually being my friend and listening to me rant and rant about this and other things on a daily basis. I love you.
Hopefully, this was worth your wait.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. There I said it. I don't think I'm lying when I say it'd be better if I did.
Ohh, also, before you read- or after- check out the banners that my girl Shailee made for this story. Thanks, beebs. (just take the spaces out of the links :))
H t t p : / / I 4 3 6 . p h o t o b u c k e t . c o m / a l b u m s / q q 8 1 / S h a I l e e A r t s / S I g n a t u r e s / I m a g e 1 0 – 1 . p n g
H t t p : / / I 4 3 6 . p h o t o b u c k e t . c o m / a l b u m s / q q 8 1 / S h a I l e e A r t s / S I g n a t u r e s / I m a g e 1 1 – 1 . p n g
I've been lonely,
I've been waiting for you,
I'm pretending and that's all I can do.
"Brooke," he says, as he walks through the door, the bell jingling to signal his arrival. "We really need to talk about Delila's Christmas list."
She looks up and him and knowing the look on his face, turns around, drops into her chair and sighs. "Lucas, no. I don't have the time."
"No?" he asks, looking around. "Because you're so busy right now."
She closes her eyes and rubs at her temples. He's making the headache that their daughter and his nephew gave her this afternoon infinitely worse and he hasn't even said a word about the subject she's been avoiding. The baby that their baby wants from them.
"I hate not getting her what she wants."
Of course he'd say that. He spoils her rotten and then she deals with the consequences. Besides this isn't a doll or even that extremely expensive robot looking thing that she just had to have and now doesn't even look at, this is another human life. One she'd have to carry and bear and raise. Alone. Except, not really alone. And it's not like the first one is that bad. She loves her. Lucas loves her. They're friends. Is she actually even considering it? "Ugh," she groans out loud. "No, Lucas. You would say that. This can't be about what she wants. Have you thought about what we'd have to do to give her everything she wants?"
He smiles and she almost goes weak at the sight of it. She already knows he's going to turn on the charm. "Yeah," he says smoothly. "Is there something wrong with that? Because I don't seem to remember there ever being a problem with that before."
She can feel herself tense as he asks that. Wrong? It's wrong on so many levels. She cannot let herself ever go there again. She narrows her eyes at him and yells in a whisper, "You're seriously going to ask me that right now?"
"Let's see," she says, ticking reasons why it's wrong off on her fingers. "Number one, you have a girlfriend called Peyton. Number two, we have a daughter who would be extremely confused. Number three, you have a family who would probably disown both of us if we did something so irresponsible. Number four, I don't want to raise another child alone."
That's as far as she gets because he interrupts her, "Alone?"
-x-l-x-l-x-
The love I'm sending,
Ain't making it through to your heart.
You've been hiding, never letting it show,
Always trying to keep it under control.
Alone. She considers herself a single mother. He has never seen her that way. They're a family- him, Brooke, and Delila. He helps her in every way that he would if they were husband and wife- without the sex. "You really think you raise Dee alone?"
"Lucas," she starts, looking down. "You are a wonderful father. Really, you are. I'd never take that away from you. But you missed a year of her life- over a year- to do the book thing. I've never been able to do something like that. And that's because I'm her mother and I'm with her all the time. And you're her father and you aren't with her all the time."
She looks like she's sad to be breaking this news to him but that does nothing to ease the pain that those words create in him. It might actually be upsetting him more right now. "Seriously, Brooke. You made me go. I didn't want to. Or rather, I wanted you girls to come. Damnit. She's my life. Don't you dare act like I'm not always there for her. I would have come home for her, or you, in a heartbeat."
"I know that," she reaches out to touch his arm and he involuntarily flinches away from her. "Lucas, don't be that way. I wasn't saying you're a bad dad; you're an amazing dad. And she loves you more than anyone else. I'm just saying that I tuck her in more nights alone than I do with someone there. It's usually just her and me at the dinner table. I field most of her uncomfortable questions. You have the choice to get away. I never do."
"No, I guess you don't. But that's by choice." He walks toward the door leading to the back room where he knows his daughter is asleep, "She's mine. I'd take her for years if you wanted to go chase a dream. And, unlike you, I'd take her to visit you. Because I love you, Brooke. I love you. And that's why I was considering this small request from our daughter. Because there's no one else that I want children with. Ever. I love you."
She looks away from him but not before he sees the tears. He just doesn't understand. If she wants more, she should just tell him. She knows his stance on it. His feelings haven't been hidden from her in a really long time. There's only one thing that she doesn't know, "One other thing, B. I may have a girlfriend. You are part of the reason for that. But not anymore. No amount of calls to my mom about me and Peyton, no amount of you telling me what you believe I'm meant for, none of that is going to make me and someone- that's not you- work. So, the second that I can pull away for two days and get out to LA, I won't have a girlfriend. And you'll have no more excuses."
With that, he turns and walks out of the room to get their daughter's things ready for his afternoon with her.
-x-b-x-b-x-
You got it down and you're well,
On your way to the top.
But there's something that you forgot…
Watching Lucas walk away hurts her. He doesn't usually turn away from her. He tries to be rational and loving and understanding. His face keeps appearing in her mind, wounded and tired. She wonders if she should regret saying something so hurtful when she's partly to blame for it.
"Mama, I woke up." Her little girl's voice comes from the back of the store. When she looks up at her, there are big tears welling up in her little blue eyes.
Brooke tears away from her own cutting thoughts and smiles for her baby. "Hey, baby girl," she uses a soothing voice. "What's wrong?"
"You and daddy were fighting." It's quiet and hurts Brooke more than she wants it to. Her little girl should never have to deal with their issues. This is exactly the kind of thing she's been trying to avoid.
She shakes her head and picks up her tiny four-year old. "No, sweetie. We weren't. We were just talking."
Her daughter looks almost disappointed at the half-hearted lie, "You weren't. Daddy used his mean voice. You're not happy. Daddy isn't happy. He's using that face."
Brooke knows exactly what face she's talking about. She taught her faces because sometimes kids say the wrong things at the wrong times and in this town, tensions run high often. She wanted her to be prepared. The face that she hates is Lucas's "strong face."
That's what they call it. Delila doesn't really know Brooke's "strong face" since it's usually the only face that she ever wears. It's the determination in a set jaw right before someone is about to cry or scream out in frustration. It's holding all of that in.
It's the hiding face. She knows it all too well.
"Brooke, this is ridiculous. You should be taking her to see him. You should be talking to him."
She knows that Haley is right and yet, she can't bring herself around to the idea of going to New York to see Lucas. He left three weeks ago, just a day shy of the New Year. And he's been agonizing over not seeing his daughter. She understands that because she knows that she'd never be able to spend more than a day away from her baby. Until this, Lucas hadn't spent more than a couple of days at a time away from her. Almost a month must be excruciating. So she agreed to let Haley take her up to see him for the weekend but she still refused to go. She shakes her head, "I don't expect you to get it, Hales. I can't talk to him because it's too much. It's all too much. I want our friendship back. We worked hard on that."
"You were never just friends." She informs her, "And I know that you miss him as much as Dee and I do. He misses you, too."
There it is. The truth that hurts more than the lie she's been telling herself. He misses her. She's putting them both through a painful separation that isn't worth it. She looks at the girl who has become her best friend, more than his, and smiles at the belly that's proof of the fact that in a couple of weeks Delila is going to have a cousin. She and Lucas have already agreed to be the god parents. He'll have to come home for the christening.
She should be prepared by then. This shouldn't hurt as much as it does now. By then. He certainly won't be. If it's one thing she has learned about Lucas Scott over the years, it's that his rebound rate is pretty fast.
If only hers could be just as swift. But she's not in high school anymore and she's got a child to think about. There's no meaningless sex to make her feel better. Only the hope that one day they'll be able to be friends again and the reassurance that she's doing the best thing for their daughter keep her believing she made the right choice.
"So, tutor-mama, how's this little Scott boy doing?" She needs the conversation to change. She and Lucas as a topic is not something that she can handle for long periods of time.
Haley's face immediately lights up at the mention of her unborn son. Instinctively, her hand goes to her belly, "He's good. Kicking like crazy. It'd be really funny if he came out a soccer player. The men in this family would flip."
Just like that, she's turned Haley around and they're now laughing at the basketball gene obsession. Lucas already has the WNBA on speed dial for their twenty month old.
No matter how much deflecting she does, she knows that it's always going to come back to him. But she's going to do her damnedest to ignore it. Because sooner or later, he's going to break her heart again. It won't be on purpose; it never is. That's not something that either of them can risk because her heart isn't the only one on the line anymore.
Delila's is.
And that's what she's going to keep telling herself.
-x-l-x-l-x-
What about love,
Don't you want someone to care about you?
When they started the night out at dinner, he'd been hoping for a kiss. Maybe even just a promise to try and overcome whatever. He was so sick of being alone, in a hotel room, every night of his life. He never expected at the start of the night that he'd be standing in the doorway to her new apartment now.
He's not sure if it's what he anticipated. Being honest with himself, it looks more like something Brooke chose and decorated than something the blonde girl, who he remembers, would. It's big- as far as Los Angeles apartments go- and sophisticated. There are a lot of royal tones. Deep colors. It's warm and inviting and so not Peyton. The apartment that they had shared together in Tree Hill was a lot like her bedroom in her dad's house. Filled with her artwork and pictures and albums. He couldn't find one familiar picture in this room. "Where are all of your albums?"
He has to ask. Those albums are as much a part of her as her hair or her eyes or even her drawings- which are also nowhere to be found. They make her the girl he loves. Before he knew her, he'd watch her sketch, listening to her iPod, and create conversations with her in his head. He had her created long before they ever exchanged their first words. Looking back on it now- that was probably where they went wrong.
She wasn't who he created. He wasn't her savior anymore. And it all just fell apart.
"In a guest room, somewhere," she answers, shifting her weight around, uncomfortably. "I don't really have time to listen to them much anymore."
He can tell it bothers her. She's changed and she's self-conscious about it. He can't judge it because he has changed, as well. And who's he to say which changes are good and which ones aren't? She's still the same girl he was in love with, just older, more confused, and more sophisticated. Some of that was his fault and some of it is probably the world's fault.
"So," she says, trying to force a smile. "This is home."
"Yeah," Lucas nods, looking around. "You did good, Peyt."
She smiles at him and though he knows what is supposed to come next, he can't bring himself to make a move toward her. It feels almost like a betrayal of all that he told Brooke. Of all that he told himself.
Of all that he just told her.
Yet, she seems to not mind. It boggles him that she can't, for one second, think about the implications in what he said. That she still thinks there's a way for them to be together. Yes, he told her that there was. But, really, he's not so sure about that.
She's walking toward him now with purpose and he knows that he's not going to have to go to her. She'll come to him- like she always has. She'll make it easier on him.
Her lips touch his and he closes his eyes. He can do this. He has to do this. It's the only way. Why waste time building a relationship with someone who doesn't understand about him and Brooke and Dee? Peyton gets it. As much as anyone can understand, she does.
She pulls away, "Is this okay?" The question is insecure, like she's unsure of what they're about to do.
Okay? It's sex with Peyton. A year, three months and two days after the last time he had sex. But that time was much different. That time, wasn't really sex at all. It was all of his love poured into a night and a girl who would always have it. Is that okay? He doesn't really know.
But he nods anyway. Instead of saying anything, he pulls her back towards his lips and kisses her this time, wrapping his hands around her neck. Holding her in place.
She kisses him back eagerly and he squeezes his eyes tight. He's not imagining that she's someone else. He's almost imagining she's not here at all. Or that he's not. He knows that if he can just get through this first time, it'll get easier.
He walks her toward the wall and traps her against it. His lips start moving away from her lips, to other areas. They travel down her neck, stopping in all of the spots that he knows will make her go crazy. His hands never leave the wall on either side of her; his eyes never open. It almost kills him that he knows her that well. He doesn't need to look at her to know where his lips are touching on her body. When he reaches her collarbone, he feels her hands start to rub along the nape of his neck. They travel down his back and he shivers and finally gives into it. Opening his eyes, he asks where the bedroom is and then walks Peyton to the room she's pointing to.
He closes the door with his foot and lifts his shirt over his head simultaneously. He turns to Peyton and she's smiling. It's what he assumes is her seductive smile but it hasn't worked on him in a long time. She could never really seduce him, not when he's been seduced by Brooke. They're in two different leagues.
He shakes his head as if trying to knock Brooke out of it. Closing his eyes once more, he takes a hold of Peyton and kisses her again, only pausing to pull her shirt over her head. Then he pushes her onto the bed, pushes up the skirt she has on to get to her panties, and pulls them off.
He'd be lying if he said he knew what she was enjoying or if he even said he knew what kind of face she was making. He can't even see her anymore; he's looking right through her. His pants drop with almost no effort and he finds himself on top of Peyton, kissing her once more.
Putting one hand underneath of her, he brings himself close. Then remembering protection, he asks if they're okay and she nods and says that she's protected. With that affirmed, he lets go of every inhibition and pushes himself inside of her.
She moans and he's brought back into reality as she matches his thrusts. She's enjoying it; he can, too. He speeds up his pace and feels his release building. He holds on, waiting for hers. And when she's ready, she pulls him over the edge with her. When they've rode out the waves of rapture, he rolls over, off of her, to the other side of the bed.
Physically, he hasn't felt this good in a really long time. But as she cuddles into his side and tells him that she loves him, he can't reciprocate it.
He's more confused now than ever.
-x-n-x-h-x-
What about love,
I only want to share it with you.
You might need it someday.
"Ho, ho, ho." Nathan's voice rings throughout their downstairs. "How's my favorite bad girl?"
When he finally appears in the kitchen, where Haley is, she can't help but laugh. He's in a Santa outfit, beard and fat suit and all. "I think you're a couple of weeks early, Mr. Claus."
"Ah, no," he grins. "A little birdie told me that Auntie Brooke has Jamie for the night. Santa's coming early for you."
She raises an eyebrow, "Oh really, what else did Lucas, the birdie, say?"
"Just that," he laughs and sits a small package down on the center island. "And that I should show you how much you mean to me. He's going a little crazy with the girl stuff, I think. But he's not wrong. I'm lucky to have my girl."
He takes her into his arms and gives her a kiss as she reaches over for the box. "Nah, ah, ah." He swats her hand away. "Did I say you could have it?"
"Come on, what is it?" Her hand darts out, trying to get the box once more, but he's faster and pulls it out of her reach.
"How much do you want it?"
She smiles seductively, "Oh, so we're going to play that game, are we?"
She brings herself up onto her tiptoes and kisses him, hard. Wrapping her arms around him and rubbing her hands up and down his back, she pulls away only to say, "This much." Then she continues kissing him until she can feel him relax completely, entangling his hands in her hair.
"I love you," he whispers when his lips leave hers to roam her neck.
She pulls back, holding the box, and laughs, "I love you, too."
She does a little dance around the kitchen, knowing that she just beat him at his own game and he laughs, "You might wanna open it. Because, Mrs. Scott, you are so gonna pay for that."
She lets out a little squeal and runs from the kitchen, yelling behind her, "You'll have to catch me first!"
Locking herself in their bathroom, she opens the box to see a pair of diamond hoop earrings. She sits the box on the vanity and throws open the door. "I surrender!" she exclaims, waving her hands in the air. "They're gorgeous."
"Not nearly as gorgeous as you, Hales."
He's so sincere that she just jumps into his arms. "I think you should punish me now."
"Mmm. . ." he murmurs. "I thought you'd never ask."
She giggles as he drops kisses her at her earlobe, then her neck, then her collarbone, and her shoulder. He kisses until the giggling is gone and she's got goose bumps all over.
"I love you," he whispers again, pulling his shirt over his head.
She nods, "I love you, too. Thank you, baby."
"Anytime. I am lucky to have you."
-x-b-x-b-x-
I can't tell you what you're feeling inside,
And I can't sell you what you don't want to buy.
"Brooke, is something wrong?" Milly questions the minute she walks into the store.
It's obvious to her and anyone who comes into the store that the bubbly brunette is anything but this afternoon. She's not smiling, for starters. Not even a fake smile, without dimples. She's scowling, which is something that Brooke Davis does not do. Her shoulders are slumped and her eyebrows are scrunched up. It's as if someone just told her that she had to solve the world's hardest calculus question.
Jamie smiles at Brooke's assistant and babbles what sounds like, "Uncle Lucas, bad."
Of course it's about Lucas. It always is. Millicent has been working with Brooke for over three years now so she knows that unless she wants to, Brooke isn't going to talk about whatever he did or said to put her in this mood. She bypasses it altogether and asks about Jamie instead.
"Hey, little man. Did your mama forget to come get you today?"
He giggles and shakes his head no and Brooke snaps out of the daze she's been in to inform her that Jamie is spending the night with her. "Haley wanted a date night with Nathan so I said I'd take my godson. We're gonna watch movies after we go pick up Delila."
"Santa Claus is on tonight!" The little boy exclaims throwing his hands up in the air.
Milly smiles at Brooke laughing at him working himself into a frenzy over the cartoon movie. "Why don't you leave now? Go pick up Dee and have your night in with the kids. I'm fine here, Brooke."
"Nah, Luke just got her a couple of hours ago." Her whole demeanor changes the moment she says his name and she's right back to the broody Brooke that Milly walked in on a couple of minutes ago.
Millicent breaks, finally having to know what happened this afternoon that made Brooke this way. "Okay, what happened to you?"
Brooke shakes her head, "It's nothing really. Luke and I just had a fight."
"Here? In the store?"
She seems confused. Brooke is baffled by it, too. There were several times when he first came home from touring when she knew he had something more to say, but he wouldn't say it because he didn't want to start anything with Brooke in her store. He didn't want to scare any potential customers away. He was very protective of Brooke's dream. This afternoon, him saying what he did in the store, was so out of character for him.
He usually holds it in.
When she doesn't answer, Millicent asks another question. "What about? His time with Dee?"
"No." She sighs. If Haley had come today, she'd already have all of this out of her system but she's pretty sure her best friend had something else to do today. And she doesn't begrudge her that at all. Hales deserves a little bit of her husband every now and then. But because of it, she's all confused and she doesn't know what to do about anything. And she has to go pick Delila up and see Lucas and she doesn't know how to act with him now. She doesn't know how he's going to act. If he's willing to make a scene in the boutique, what is he going to do in the privacy of his home?
"I ran into Peyton."
Peyton? Her mind can't even process the name. Peyton. Her ex best friend slash his three time ex girlfriend and the reason they broke up more than once, Peyton.
She can feel herself pulling away. Dropping into his big, comfy armchair. Where's Delila? She needs to get out of here.
"No," he's trying to command her. "You can't take back what you just said, okay?"
"You saw Peyton?" She tries to smile but her voice is faltering and she feels like she can't breathe. "How's she doing? Taking the music world by storm, I bet."
"Brooke." He puts a hand on each shoulder and kneels in front of her, "Please, calm down. Hear me out. Please."
She nods. If she wants him to think that she's even remotely calm, she can't talk. She can't take a breath. Because every time she does, she feels like someone has just sucked all of the oxygen out of the room and she wants to hyperventilate.
He takes a deep breath in and starts on a story that, she already knows from the look on his face, she doesn't want to hear. "I was doing a signing in a mall. It's big, lots of celebrities go there. Lindsey met some singer while we were there; she was really excited."
He's rambling about celebrities. That's never good. Her mind is screaming for him to just get to the part where Peyton destroys her resolve to be with him.
"Everyone was blending together and I couldn't see or think or anything. All I knew was that I was coming home to face you. I was scared. And then she was there. In front of me. And I realized that I missed her and that whenever you leave a void in me, she helps to fill it."
She turns her head at this. He's going to make whatever happened in LA her fault. And he'd be right. She should've been with him. The tears that she's been blinking away ever since the first time he said her name are now threatening to spill over onto her cheeks.
He pauses and reaches over to turn her head gently back toward him. "Don't look away, Pretty." His voice cracks. "Please, don't do that."
"What happened?" She needs to know. This changes everything. Everything that she's been thinking about.
"We went to dinner." He's talking as if he's detached from it now. "I told her what happened with us. I told her that I'd always love you but that you didn't love me."
He breaks off at that, choking back a sob.
"And?"
She already knows. She doesn't want to but she knew the minute he said the name. Lucas can never walk away from Peyton.
"Please." There are tears now. If he's crying, he really screwed up. "Please don't change your mind. I can take it back."
"But you can't, Luke."
She hates it. He can't take back sleeping with Peyton. She can't take back the year and a half that she pretended she didn't love him. That she wasn't in love with him. All of the hurt and pain and love and hate. None of it can be taken back. This is all of their faults. Hers and his. Peyton's and their family. They all allowed it to happen.
"I love you."
Those three words break her heart because she loves him, too. But she was right last winter. This isn't about love. There's more at stake.
Her heart. His. Delila's.
She couldn't allow this to happen again.
-x-l-x-l-x-
Something's missing you got to,
Look back on your life.
You know something here just ain't right.
"Let's start over."
He can see her take a big gulp of air in before the words come out.
"That depends on what starting over means." He barely manages to get it out.
"Let's pretend that last November never happened. Let's pretend that we love each other."
He can feel himself smile. "We do love each other. That's not pretend."
"Let's do this because we have a daughter together," she continues on. "A daughter who deserves her parents loving each other."
Wait, what? He doesn't understand. Forget that night and everything that followed? "You want to just be. . ." he trails off. He can't even say it.
"I want to go back to being friends the way that we were before Dee got sick." She seems so resolved. Strong.
But he can see the painful aching in her eyes. He can tell that this isn't what she wants.
"What do you want me to do with the love that I have for you?"
She shrugs. "Channel it into something useful. I do."
"No." He's firmly trying to talk her down now.
The tears are gone and there's a tough determination behind him now. He's not letting her change her mind.
"I made a mistake. So did you." He's trying his best not to beg. "Please. Brooke."
Too late. He's pleading. "I'm sorry."
"So am I." She nods and he thinks that he might be getting somewhere.
"Mama!"
His little girl bursts into the living room from her bedroom and starts talking a mile a minute about the remodel they're planning for her room. She decided while he was gone that pink wasn't the color for her anymore. At almost four, she's very opinionated and mostly Brooke-like. Apparently, just not in color preference because she wants blue and he can't tell her no.
Her mom had the same affect on him for a long time. Whatever they want always goes.
He closes his eyes. He needs some time alone with her to get her to see his side.
"Sweetie," he hears her say to Dee, "How about you go get your bag? It's time to go home."
She had been so excited that it didn't even seem like she could tell that they were tense and crying. It's a good thing that she's not affected by all of this. He doesn't want her to be. She doesn't deserve to be.
"Brooke," he starts.
She shakes her head and puts her hand up, "No, Lucas. This is it. Final."
"What?" he asks. "Final? Brooke, no. It's not."
"It is." She tells him. "Friends. I don't care what you and Peyton do together. I don't care what you and any random girl do. We're friends. And maybe you should try to make it work with Peyton."
"I don't want her!" He's so angry that she's acting this way.
He didn't cheat on her.
"Yeah," Brooke nods. "And I don't want her seconds. Not anymore."
"Her seconds?" he questions. "Really Brooke? Her seconds?"
His voice is getting louder no matter how much he wants to control it. "You are the mother of my child. I love you. I told her that I love you! I want to be with you."
"Well, I think you should get over it."
She's like a stone and he knows from experience that when she's like this, nothing cracks her.
"Let's go, baby."
He turns to see his little girl walking into the room, dragging her bag and old teddy bear behind her. Her big blue eyes are looking at him, questioning. "Is everything okay, daddy?"
She looks like she's about to cry and he feels instantly guilty. "Everything's fine, beautiful. Daddy's just upset because he's going to miss you. He loves you so much and doesn't want to be away from you."
"You're going away again?" Tears start welling up and he bends down to scoop her up.
His eyes go from hers to Brooke's and back again. "I'm not going anywhere. This is my home and I missed you so much."
She seems satisfied with that answer. "Will you come visit me at mommy's like before?"
He nods. "Whatever you want."
Then he picks up her things and walks out to Brooke's car with her. He buckles her into her car seat and smiles toward Brooke. "Give me a call soon and we'll talk about when I can have her again?"
If she's going to pretend, then so will he.
For some reason, he didn't think he'd spend too long pretending. He has no idea how it got to be almost two years later with him still pretending that this isn't killing him.
Brooke is much better at it than he is.
When he hears the doorbell ring, he knows it's her and he wants to continue the talk that they were having so he sends Delila into her room to grab her things.
"Hey, B." He opens the door to his ex-girlfriend, holding his nephew. Damnit. He forgot all about her keeping Jamie tonight even though he told Nathan earlier on the phone that she was. "I really wanted to talk to you."
Her eyes carefully avoid his. "I don't have the time right now, Lucas."
It's curt and cold, as if she's doing business and not talking to him about love. About family.
"Well, when will you have the time?" Instantly, he's angry.
She turns further away from him and yells into his house, "Dee, hurry up, babe. We're having a sleepover with Jamie tonight!"
"Brooke." He tries to get her to look at him. Just one look.
"When will we be important enough to fit into your schedule?"
She turns to him as Delila runs into the room, clearly excited at the prospect of a sleepover, "Never."
It's concise and ultimate. She's not budging.
Delila starts to ask for Lucas to come and Brooke cuts her off. "Not tonight. Daddy has things to do. Things to think about. Kiss daddy byes. You won't be seeing him for awhile."
He kneels down and gives her a big hug and kiss, unsure of what's happening. She can't take away his daughter. She wouldn't.
"Brooke?" It's a question; he doesn't know what's going on. "Why?"
"You said you wanted time to go to LA." She finally turns her eyes towards his and locks on.
"Go to LA, Luke." She dares him. "Prove it."
What about love,
Don't you want someone to care about you?
What about love,
Don't let it slip away.
What about love,
I only want to share it with you.
Please review. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it and it was worth the wait! :)
- Corey
