Yey! I managed to write out a chapter for this story too! I figured I'd update this story next because so many of you peoples want more of it. Well, I don't blame you; I want more of it myself. Not to be smug or anything.
Chapter 7: Deciding Who's at Fault
If there was a time of day that Alexis absolutely hated, it had to be mornings. Not only did she hate leaving the wondrous comfort of sleep, but also she hated not having anything worth getting up to. Alexis rolled over on her side and looked out into the room. It was dull and boring. The gray walls, ceiling, and floor matched her downcast mood. Rad was snoring lightly in the background. Alexis had to admit though, that the darkness of the room was very peaceful.
Sighing, the woman got up from the couch and went over to her suitcase where she pulled out her outfit for the day. Alexis yawned as she slipped inside the bathroom and immediately looked into the mirror to observe her bruise that had begun forming the previous night. It was an ugly purple and green color that resembled a fist. No amount of make up could hide it because of its rich color. It angered Alexis knowing she had to come up with an excuse—a lie for it now. But why bother lying? Why didn't she just piss off on Rad and tell the autobots the truth?
If telling the truth weren't so hard, Alexis knew she would have confessed to the autobots what was going on between her and Rad a hundred times over by now. But why was it that she had been able to tell Starscream what was going on? Why had she told Starscream, a decepticon for that matter, such a terrible secret? The autobots were extremely close friends to her, but she hadn't worked up the courage to tell them. It was rather childish, but Alexis was afraid of them, afraid of what they would say, what they would do if they really knew what was going on. But didn't the autobots already suspect that something was going on? Didn't they keep telling her that she could tell them anything? Wasn't that why they kept asking how things were between her and Rad?
Alexis shook her head trying to ward off any more questions and proceeded to take a shower and get dressed afterwards. The water from the shower only seemed to dampen her spirits even more than they already were. Alexis gathered up her pajamas into a bundle, not really caring to fold them up since she would just be putting them on again that night. The woman exited the bathroom and looked over to the bed where she saw Rad sitting up, stretching and yawning. Looking away from him, Alexis finished packing the rest of her things. She pretended not to hear or see when Rad got up from the bed and proceeded to go to the bathroom with the door open. It was so immature and unlike him, it caused Alexis to feel absolutely repulsed.
A couple moments later, Rad came out and his face brightened the instant he saw Alexis. He seemed to take no notice of her cheek as he came up from behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist asking, "What's for breakfast?"
"I don't know," Alexis sighed glumly, wishing she could rip Rad's arms right off his body and beat the living hell out of him with them. Not only would it feel good, but also he deserved it. He deserved anything that could possibly knock some sense into him. She continued, "What would you like?"
"Well, you're looking quite delicious this morning," Rad replied brushing his lips against the nape of her neck.
Alexis had to suppress a shiver of fear and fidgeted a bit in his arms. "What about for food?" she questioned.
"How about chocolate covered you?" Rad suggested continuing to kiss the back of her neck.
"Rad," Alexis remarked and couldn't help but say, "Chocolate isn't a food."
She heard him chuckle against her shoulder and then he said, "It's early Alexis, we've got a couple hours before we have to leave…what do you say we go—
"Sorry Rad, but I'm not in the mood," Alexis answered, and it was the truth.
"Then you owe me," Rad stated sounding disappointed.
Alexis turned and faced him smiling sweetly, "I don't owe you anything honey, after what you did to me last night."
Rad frowned, "It's just a little bruise."
"A little bruise, huh?" Alexis returned raising her voice, "Are you blind? This little bruise is the same size as you fist! And I'll leave it up to you to explain why I have this bruise to the autobots."
"You're so pathetic Alexis!" he exclaimed before storming into the bathroom to take a shower.
"And you can make your own damn breakfast!" Alexis shouted after him before she angrily sat down on the couch and glared daggers into the wall in front of her.
Why, out of all the billions of people on the planet, was it her that had to suffer like this? Sure, there was probably other people out there that were suffering just like her, if not, worse. But still, why had she been one of those people chosen to suffer in such a manner? What had she done to deserve this kind of punishment? Alexis hated feeling sorry for herself like this, she hated it bitterly, only because she had been born and raised to care about others. And that's all she really had ever wanted to do: help everyone who need help, to save anyone who needed rescuing. But Alexis was quite certain it was her who needed the rescuing this time, but no one knew that she was suffering, just Starscream.
Alexis wasn't sure how long she could keep going with this act she was putting on. She wasn't sure how long she could continue to pretend that she wasn't suffering. How long would it be before the autobots started seeing through her and start seeing her wounds? Would they see the scars? Would they see how afraid she was, how confused, and how alone she felt? Would they try to stop her bleeding? Would they offer her a helping hand and tell her everything was going to be okay? Would they punish Rad and keep him away from her so that he couldn't hurt her anymore? Would they willingly give her a shoulder to cry on? Would they rescue her? Would they?
It seemed like an eternity before Rad got out of the bathroom, dressed and ready to take on the day. He glared at Alexis before he went into the kitchen and made himself a couple slices of toast and a coffee. The smell of the toast, its rich and intoxicating stench, went right to Alexis's throat and stomach. She had to grip the cushion on the couch ever so tightly to keep herself from gagging or throwing up. Her appetite was completely drained now, and she tried to concentrate on the relaxing fumes of the coffee.
A few minutes later, when Alexis's stomach had settled, she got up and got herself her own cup of coffee. She stood at the counter looking at the coffee maker and knew that the kids had designed this room. It really didn't matter though since in an hour or so this room would be deserted.
"Alexis, is everything my fault?"
Rad's voice had sounded different and far away, like he was going through his own inner turmoil. At that moment, Alexis felt her heart snap in two. Had she really been so blind? Was she really so wrapped up in her own problems that she didn't at once consider that Rad, her own husband, was suffering as well? But how was she supposed to answer the question?
Yes Rad, everything is entirely your fault.
No Rad, don't blame yourself, but please don't blame me either.
"Rad, we both have flaws. You drink and have become a lot more aggressive lately. I've become too stuck on myself. Rad, what happened…what happened to us?" Alexis answered, turning to him and sitting down at the table across from him.
"We're falling apart," Rad replied plainly, "We're being beaten and bruised by each other, but for what reason?"
"It all started a month or so before Carlos died. You know, when you didn't get that promotion at work and you started drinking…and then that drunk driver hit Carlos, which only damaged us further," she explained.
As if only to add insult to injury, Rad chuckled and said, "I miss him. Oh hell, he was the only one, besides you, that could understand me." Rad's smile suddenly disappeared as he slammed a fist down on the table, "This is all his fault! If he hadn't have died, we wouldn't be like this…I wouldn't be like this."
Alexis saw a gleam in his eyes, a gleam that told a story, one that she had never heard before. It whispered inaudible secrets, secrets that Alexis didn't know. Was Rad hiding something? Something so deep, so dark, so poisonous, that it was destroying him, from the inside out?
A knock at the door surprised them both. Alexis, forgetting about the bruise, went over to the door and opened it only to be greeted by Lori.
"Hey, are you ready to go?" Lori asked sounding extremely excited, "What happened to your cheek?"
"Oh, I guess I was standing a little too close to Rad last night, and when he turned around to face me, he swung his arm around and hit me right in the face with it," Alexis lied.
Lori shook her head and then looked over to Rad saying, "Watch where you're swinging your arms!"
Rad smiled innocently as he got up from the table and joined Alexis by the door. "Are you ready to go sweetheart?" he questioned.
"Yes," she answered feeling sick.
Lori giggled, "Aren't you guys cute. Well, I'll meet up with you in the command center in a few minutes."
"Alright Lori," Alexis replied and watched as Lori scampered off.
Rad grabbed their bags and the two of them headed off the command center.
It really didn't take long to get to Jungle Planet, less than an hour, and Alexis was surprised how much it looked like earth. With the exception of the transformers as inhabitants, Jungle Planet could pass as a twin. Leobreaker already had a temporary base set up for them, equipped with all the things three humans would need. It took Rad and Alexis most of the afternoon to unpack their stuff in their room. Afterwards, they had dinner and decided to go for a walk with Lori.
The teenage girl was extremely thrilled to be walking on an alien ground. "This place is so cool," she squealed, "I am so going to show Scourge his place in this struggle."
Alexis giggled, "Just be careful Lori."
"Scourge is the only one who needs to be advised on being careful," Lori stated rather smugly, "Hey, we didn't exactly tell the autobots we came out here on this walk, what if we run into the decepticons or something?"
"We scream and runaway," Alexis explained.
"Oh sure, the girls can scream and runaway. I'll just runaway," Rad protested.
"Oh, aren't you the man," Lori remarked.
Both Rad and Alexis laughed. It was rather amazing how Alexis could still have fun like this, with her abusive husband. She had a feeling though, that if Lori weren't around, things just wouldn't be going the way they should. And then everything backfired.
"Hey guys, I'll let you have your alone time. I'm going to go back to the base and chill," Lori stated before running off.
Rad didn't miss a beat and immediately said, "Hey Alexis, you still owe me from this morning."
"No I don't Rad."
"Come on Alexis, you know you want to. And the thrill of doing it out in public—
"I said no Rad! That's your problem, you don't understand the meaning of no," she exclaimed.
"Alexis! What's your problem? I'm going back to the base, and if you feel like moping around out here some more, go right ahead. I hope the decepticons get you," Rad snarled before storming away.
There was never a threat lower than that. I hope the decepticons get you. It was the equivalent of saying I hope you die. Alexis sat down where she was, hugged her knees to her chest, and began to cry.
"You shouldn't let him get away with things like that," Starscream suddenly exclaimed stepping out from some dense brush.
"Y-You saw?" Alexis replied trying to wipe the tears away from her face.
"And heard," Starscream confessed. He glanced about, feeling rather uncomfortable, before he finally sat down in front of the human. "Alexis," he spoke, "What happened to the girl I once knew twenty years ago? The girl who wasn't afraid of anything? The girl who wouldn't take no for an answer and was hell bent on saving everyone? The girl who wanted to make the world a better place? The girl who save me from myself? Where is she Alexis?"
Alexis's face crumpled, "I don't know. She died when Starscream died twenty years ago. She never came back, even when Starscream did, because her heart was eaten up by an unloving monster named Rad!"
"Do you know how much Starscream missed her? Do you know how much Starscream wants to rescue her this time, not only from Rad, but also from Megatron, and herself? Because he cares, Starscream cares, and because of the bond between him and Alexis twenty years ago, he never wants anything bad to happen to her."
"Oh Starscream!" Alexis sobbed, "I don't know who I am anymore. What has time done to me? What has time done with my heart?"
"Alexis, it's not time that has hurt you, it's Rad, and I swear that I will make him pay. He is the one destroying you Alexis, you're not the one doing the wrong," Starscream replied.
Alexis sighed heavily and was quiet a few moments before she wiped her tear stained face. Looking up at Starscream, she let out a chuckle. Starscream frowned, he hated being laughed at and thus was prompted to ask, "What's so funny?"
"Nothing really, I just find it kind of ironic to be getting sympathy from a decepticon," she answered.
"Just because I'm a heartless decepticon doesn't mean I'm incapable of giving sympathy," he responded.
"Heartless huh? Hold me up to you chest Starscream," Alexis requested.
Starscream didn't hesitate to lift her gently in his hand and hold her against his chest. He wasn't at all sure what the human was up to, but he didn't at all mind the warmth of her touch.
"I don't see how you're heartless Starscream," Alexis exclaimed, pressing her body up against his chest, "You're very warm right here."
Starscream didn't know what to say. Did he really have a heart capable of love?
"I think I'm going to head back to the base now Starscream, I'm getting kind of tired," Alexis explained.
Starscream nodded, setting the woman back down on the ground, and stood up. "Until next time Alexis," he said before taking off to the skies and back to the decepticons.
When Alexis got back to the base, she was so extremely tired that she could hardly move. She walked sluggishly in the direction of her and Rad's room when she suddenly came across Rad peaking into Lori's room. Sickness and anger grabbed at her heart as she watched her husband slide a hand into his pants. "Rad!" she hissed scaring the man, "What on earth do you think you're doing?"
Rad glared at her before extracting his hand from his pants and heading back to their room. Alexis knew she would have to tell Lori what was going on in the morning.
Well, TTFN, ta ta for now! Heh, I couldn't resist saying that. But anyways, I'd really like some reviews please and thank you, oh, and here's your cookies that I promised!
