A/N: This is a long chapter for me lol. Which I suppose is a good thing. Anyways I won't ramble and make it longer! Read, review, and enjoy!
"I may seem crazy… Or painfully shy, and these scars wouldn't be so hidden if you would just look me in the eye. I feel alone here and cold here, though I don't want to die. But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside…"
--"Cut" by Plumb
By the time Sara made it back to Catherine's office both Nick and Warrick were present. As they greeted her, Sara nervously tugged at her sleeve hoping that none of her blood had leaked through it.
Clearing her throat Catherine addressed them as a group.
"So as you all should know by now, thanks to Conrad Ecklie, we have an extra, high profile case on hand. I just glanced over the file and we're looking at a serial killer, possibly another "strip strangler" type. Sara, I am going to put you on this case with Nick. Warrick you and I will work on the teen murder-suicide case. Nick and Warrick, you two are doubling up because you still have to work the celebrity murders, let me know if its getting too hectic and I will do the best I can to help out. Everyone clear?"
Warrick and Nick nodded but Sara frowned.
"Why are you pulling me off the teen murder case?"
"You seem to have a very strong emotional reaction to it and I feel like you would be better off working on something else." Catherine said firmly.
"You're kidding me right?" Sara responded, her voice rising. "After I just spent practically a day and a half on it?"
Catherine motioned for Nick and Warrick to leave the room and then turned back to Sara.
"Sara, I can see that it's stressing you out. You came in this morning almost nine hours before your shift started and you stared at the evidence until almost 3:00 A.M. last night. You have an emotional issue with this case and it would be wrong of me as both a supervisor and a friend to allow you to continue working on it!"
Sara knew she was right, even though she would never admit it. She wanted to yell at Catherine, to tell her that Grissom would never take her off a case for such a stupid reason. But she knew that wasn't true. She was positive that she would have not seen so much as a hair on the girl's head had Grissom witnessed her panic attack on the scene.
Trying to keep her face and voice neutral she told Catherine she would work on the serial case with Nick and left the office.
Catherine sighed and turned to the pile of case photos on her desk. Digging through them she was surprised to find that the first several photos on top of the stack were all of the cuts on the girl's arm. Next to them lay an evidence bag with some razors, perhaps the instruments the girl used to harm herself with.
Catherine stared at it for a moment before something clicked in her memory. Earlier when she had found Sara asleep on her desk there had been an un-bagged razor blade lying near her hand. At the time she figured Sara had taken it from the evidence to examine but thinking back she couldn't recall collecting a razor that was even remotely similar at the scene. Trying to push back the sinking feeling forming in her stomach she dug through the rest of the box. No razor. She checked the trash. All she found was a bloody tissue.
Feeling fear spread throughout her she ran out of her office in search of Sara. She was so intent on finding her that she practically collided with Nick in front of the DNA lab.
"Whoa. Slow down Catherine!" Nick laughed.
"Where's Sara?" Catherine asked breathlessly.
"She said she had to go to the bathroom but that was over 10 minutes ago. I was going to just peek in and call her name to make sure she didn't wander off somewhere else." He replied calmly.
"No, it's okay. I'll go check on her!" Catherine said, turning on her heel and dashing away.
"Thanks Cath!" Nick called after her.
Upon entering the bathroom Catherine heard muffled sobs coming from the farthest stall.
"Sara?" She called as she made her way past the sinks.
The sobbing stopped abruptly.
"Sara??" Catherine said more loudly. "Are you okay??"
There was still no response so Catherine, who was now almost directly in front of Sara's stall pushed on the door lightly. She was expecting to meet resistance but Sara had not locked it and door swung open easily.
"SARA!!" Catherine practically screamed. There was blood. Blood everywhere. Sara's whole arm seemed to be oozing it and if there were individual incisions there, Catherine couldn't see them.
Sara jumped up at Catherine's reaction. Instinctively pulling her sleeve over her arm. Catherine didn't wait to discuss it. She grabbed the razor blade from Sara's hand, accidentally nicking her own finger in the process. Ignoring the sting she pulled out her cell.
She was just about to dial 911 when Sara pushed the phone out of her hand.
"Don't." She said. "It's not as bad as it looks. See." She pulled her sleeve up and Catherine was able to observe that the bleeding had calmed considerably, soaked up by the cloth.
"Sara, regardless of how serious it is you need help. You have to go to the hospital." Catherine said her tone calmer but still concerned.
Sara shook her head as the tears began to spill again. "I've seen enough hospitals and ambulances to last me a lifetime." She cried, sliding down the wall. Catherine grabbed some wet paper towels and came back to sit beside her.
"Give me your arm." She said quietly.
Sara obeyed.
"Listen Sara" Catherine said while dabbing her wounds with the paper towels. "This whole ordeal must be very difficult to you and perhaps I don't even understand what you're going through but I know that these type of things need attention. Now we don't have to call an ambulance but you do need to visit the hospital and I will drive you.
Sara nodded weakly, too exhausted to argue. Both women stood and Sara pulled down her sleeve once more.
"What about the case?" Sara asked, looking worried.
"Don't stress about it. I can double. You are one of the best CSI's Sara. You're not going to loose your job over this."
"And Ecklie?"
"I'll deal with him." Catherine answered firmly.
Sara gave a nod of thanks, Catherine grabbed her cell, and the two women left the bathroom.
As Catherine was putting her cell phone away in her coat pocket she caught sight of her beeper. Why hadn't she thought of it sooner? She thought, exasperated. Pulling her cell phone out again she quickly paged Grissom, praying that he would receive it soon.
--
That evening Grissom recreated his dinner with Sara. Everything was exactly the same except that Sara wasn't there. Same place at the bar, same food, even the same waiter strangely enough.
Once more Grissom dived into his memories.
He could see her laughing at one of his jokes and the passion in her eyes as she realized how much they had in common. Her second cocktail was dangling from her left hand and a piece of seaweed was stuck in between her front teeth. He was considering pointing it out to her when seemingly out of nowhere, she had kissed him. He could almost feel the softness of her lips upon his, the surge of electricity throughout his body as her tongue slipped between his teeth. Unfortunately the most wonderful moment of his life had only lasted a few seconds and all too quickly she was inviting him to her apartment.
Now came the hard part. Why had he refused? Had he not had enough to drink or was he really not interested at that time? No, he was definitely interested but before he had time to think the familiar excuse had already left his lips. I'm sorry. I can't. My work doesn't give me time for relationships. At least she hadn't seemed too offended. If she was hurt, it didn't show.
Rubbing his forehead in distress, he paid the check and left. When he reached his hotel room he remembered that he had lost his cell phone. After several minutes of digging through his bags, he realized that it wasn't there. Groaning he walked over to his room phone to call and cancel it. Just as he was about to pick up the receiver his beeper went off. He looked at the number. It was Catherine and it was urgent. Shit. He wondered how long she had been trying to get a hold of him. He quickly dialed her number on his room phone.
--
Catherine sat in the waiting room. Sara was in with the doctor and as soon as she was settled Catherine had to get back to the lab. She was just checking her watch when her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. She checked the caller ID. Four Seasons Hotel. Heart racing, she immediately flipped her phone open.
"Grissom!?"
"Yea, Catherine, it's me."
TBC…
