'...Mikasa, it's like... I had a wedding, me and Grisha, because I love him very much.'

The quiet girl wraps the scarf tightly around her mouth and mumbles, 'Like you love Eren?' Or me, she hopes.

Carla turns a not unpleasant shade of pink. 'I love Eren, but it's a different love. He's my son.'

'But you have to love your husband.' Mikasa frowns down at her toes while she thinks.

'Yes you should love your husband, but it's a choice. You get to choose who you let in to your heart, to be a family.' The mother smiles, laying a hand on the young girl's shoulder. 'And when you've found someone you love like that you have a wedding.'

Mikasa mulls it over, hands pulling the scarf to tuck under her chin. She thinks of the kisses and impulsive dances between her own parents, the way sometimes her mother would smile at the window while he was hunting, or clutch his hand tightly while they sat at the table with their daughter. 'Like me and Eren...?'

Carla smiles, a little unsure. 'You two will always be family. It's difficult to explain, but it'll happen when you're older Mikasa, and it's more than the dress or the food afterwards. It's a whole new phase of your life.' She pinches the girls cheek softly before turning back to the chicken she was plucking.


Sasha stood panting as Ymir pulled on the chords of her dress. 'It fit a few days ago!' She explained, one hand braced on the wall, the other on her own waist.

'You weren't this fat a few days ago.' Ymir grunted, pulling harder.

Sasha growled. 'I've been stress eating!'

'Really.' Ymir sighed with relief once her knot held. 'Bodice is in place.'

'Great.' Historia beamed as she set upon Sasha's hair, walking stick forgotten. 'Are you sure you and Connie haven't been indulging in after wedding activities?' She teased. 'Are your nipples sore?'

'I'm not pregnant.' She drawled. 'My metabolism is just failing me. So I need you to hurry up because I want to marry Connie before twenty three years of eating like a pig catches up with me.'

'Not like a pig.' Mikasa smiled as she examined her reflection. 'Pigs take breaks to roll in the mud.'

She was dressed in cream, a simple dress that hung low on her shoulders but was somehow modest. It tightened at her waist, clinched with a brown belt, and then fell down just past her knees. It was all far too delicate. Ymir's dress seemed shorter, but somehow in it the freckled girl looked like a goddess, the sort who would shoot you down for defiance. Next to her Historia shone like one who would heal your wounds.

Sasha looked the strangest, with her hair pinned in curls and her dress flowing down to the floor. The sleeves reached down to her wrists and there was something about it that made her look too much like a sacrifice, as though she would be fed to a dragon or thrown to the sea. 'Am I ready?' She asked, looking down at her shaking hands.

'Yes.' Krista smiled, finishing the last curl and resting her hands at her shoulders. 'You look beautiful.'

'You do.' Ymir smiled. 'Connie will think you're someone else.'

'You're ready.' Mikasa left her corner, laying a hand on Sasha's free shoulder.

'Right.' She nodded, then quite suddenly she slapped at her own cheek before standing. 'I'm ready.' She bolted for the door, snatching a bouquet of white winter flowers as she went.

Connie waited at the front of the church, his eyes fixed on the strange tapestry behind the alter. The local priest, an old man who had married Sasha's parents along with half of the guests, smiled warmly whenever their eyes met, but spent most of his time glaring at Eren, who stood behind Armin and Jean. Connie was about to say something about it when the door flew open, and Sasha, eyes determined and hands wound so tightly around her flowers that the heads of some had fallen off, came teetering in, her father supporting her with one arm.

A woman with long silver hair played a soft melody on her flute which ended just as the bride reached the groom. Her father kissed her forehead before taking his seat, and the bridesmaids took their places.

Mikasa shared a smile with Jean before turning back to the couple who were awkwardly repeating their vows and trying not to laugh.

Then she chanced a glance at Eren. Like the others he had been tidied up by an aunt of the family, hair cut and face clean shaven. They had all been forced in to fitted white shirts, and black braces cut a line over their shoulders, but his made him seem so much thinner, and oh so tall. The simple outfit made his eyes seem brighter, brought out the glow of his skin and the golden brown tones of his now controlled hair. She watched as his eyes darted from her to their friends and back, and when he finally settled, she offered a small smile.

His expression softened, but the eye contact did not get any easier to hold. Every second made something in her brain itch, and something in her stomach twist. Her mind raced through conversations that could happen or touches, and when the priest briefly spoke about the carnal side of love and most in the hall gave a laugh, she felt her stomach drop while his Adams Apple bobbed in his throat.

Jean caught her eye next, his eyebrows together as he tried to read her, then his teeth gritted as he looked to Eren who was still looking at her, a little sadness in his eyes now.

'Together,' the priest bellowed as he wrapped the black ribbon around their joined hands. 'I thee bind, as we all bear witness to this union. I pronounce you man and wife.'

Sasha squeaked and turned to plant her lips on Connies with an audible smack, earning an 'ooh' From the Crowd and an 'Oi' from her father.

Armin was the first to salute, his hand pressed hard in to the fabric of his slightly too big shirt. Ymir followed suit, then Historia, Mikasa, Eren, Jean. In her knee length cream dress, with her hands clasped either side of her heart, Mikasa Ackerman felt the first tear in a long time fall.


He'd known it was coming since the eye contact in the church, but Eren was still shocked when Jean asked him. 'You and her, is it over?' He asked, keeping his voice low despite the din of string instruments and loud mountain folk.

'Jean.' He sighed, putting down his pint of ale. 'There's nothing between us.' He wriggled under the other man's gaze and when the heat was too much he began to roll up his sleeves, pushing them up past the muscles and veins of his forearm. 'You've got nothing to worry about.'

Jean nodded, undoing the top button of his own. 'I just don't know Eren, she told me that too and I don't believe her anymore than you.'

'Honestly. Whatever was between us is long in the past.' A few days, he thought.

'It's not that simple though is it?' He sighed, sipping at his ale. 'Something that big doesn't stay in the past.'

Eren wanted to lie. If Jean wanted him to stay away fine, as long as he didn't ask about it, about the recent past. Lying to Jean was not as comfortable as it once had been.

'Why don't you go find her.' He smiled. 'Dance with her, tell her she's beautiful. You'll realise I'm no threat.'

Armin swayed uneasily as he strode over to them, a silly beam on his red hued face. 'Heyy.' He flung an arm around each of them. 'Jean, she does look beautiful. Why aren't you dancing with her right now? She needs to be... Be danced with.'

Jean blushed. 'Right.' He said as he slipped from under Armin's arm and back towards the wall. 'I'll go and tell her.'

Eren watched him go before taking a long sip and then slipping off his braces one at a time so they hung about the back of his thighs. 'You going to tell me to let it go?' He cocked an eyebrow at Armin, who was looking more and more like a caricature of a drunk by the second. 'That she's happy and I need to leave her be?'

Armin frowned. 'Why would I say that?'

'In my dreams you're my conscience.' Eren shrugged.

'Fuck your conscience. All I ever wanted besides a house by the sea and a wife with red hair was you two happy. Now your both happy I realise that all I actually wanted was you happy together.' He. Slurred.

'Armin.' Eren fell back against the barn wall, watching as Jean kissed Mikasa's cheek at the other side of the ballroom. 'You have a thing for red heads?'

'But you couldn't be happy together. I was there Eren. Erwin came to her and offered it up. One chance to extract you or someone not as skilled would have to do it and they would kill you. I saw her hesitate, weigh up your life with her squads and then when she failed to decide Erwin replaced her and ordered it. He ordered it Eren.'

The roar of the party was suddenly too loud.

'She got you out, then out of danger while the stragglers were killed. She saved your life and you left her. You left her scarf...'

'Its just a scarf Armin.' He shook his head and pushed away from the wall, weaving through the crowd to Connie and Sasha who were both sloshing ale over the skirt of her dress.

'Jaeger!' Connie held up his pint. 'Have you met my wife?'

'Oh shut up.' Sasha blushed, then added, 'Husband.'

'Sasha Springer.' Eren half bowed. 'Never thought I'd see the day.' He grinned.

'We...' Connie jumped to his feet. 'We didn't think you'd come you know. Thought you'd be off seeing the world...'

'Didn't think you'd want to see everybody.' Sasha added. 'Glad you came, Eren.'

'Me too.' Connie nodded.

'Congratulations.' He beamed, raising his pint.

'They'll be next!' Connie slurred, catching the attention of Jean and Mikasa who were arguing in hushed tones in the corner. 'And you and Armin will be the only bachelors left.'

Sasha shook her head. 'C'ept Levi.'

'Except Levi.' Connie nodded. 'Unless Ymir counts.' He cast an eye to the two women seated at a small table near the doors.

'No.' Eren smirked. 'I think she's taken.'

'Oh.' Connie frowned. 'Oh wow.'

Sasha poked his cheek with a chuckle. 'You can't be that clueless?'

He watched the two dissolve in to a half hearted fight, Sasha teasing and Connie puffing himself up, and from the corner of his eye he caught the very real reconciliation between Jean and Mikasa, the tentative hand holding, the tender smiles, it was all a bit much if he was honest, but then he shouldn't mind. He had sent Jean over in the first place, he was ridding himself of it all.

It was just that he wanted to rip that cream dress to shreds...

'Hey.' Sasha tapped at his shoulder. 'You're staring.' She said softly, and when Eren turned back to her with a face lit beet red she gave a sad little smile. 'I thought you two couldn't stand eachother.'

'It...' He swallowed, a hand running through his hair. 'It wasn't that simple.'

Connies hand clasped hard on his shoulder. 'Let me introduce you to some of the country girls.' He beamed, leading Eren away with a firm grip. 'There's Sarah, and Dahlia and Lorna and... Oh this is Midge...'

The woman Connie settled on was a thin thing with warm honey blond hair and eyes of startling blue. She smiled sweetly, and gave Eren a little curtesy before taking his hand and letting him spin her around once or twice as Connie retreated to his new wife (who's thunderous expression did nothing to ruin his sense of accomplishment.)

'You're the titan?' She asked, before a pink blush descended and she snatched back her hand. 'Oh god I mean... I'm sorry we've just heard so much about you.'

'It's fine.' He smiled, taking her hand again, and in his it felt small but unbelievably warm. 'Eren.'

'Midge.' She wrinkled her nose. 'So, Eren...'

'Yes?'

'You're not a very good dancer are you?'

He laughed as he spun her again before bringing her in to settle on his chest. 'Whatever do you mean?' He smirked.

She didn't seem to mind, truth be told, she was pressed up quite close, her eyes fixed quite intently upon his own. He imagined it for a second, a little home with this little woman and the sheets always draped around their hips. It would be nice for a week or two. Then, like the others, something in him would crack and he'd be distant, apathetic. She'd nag, they'd argue, it would end and not only would he never see her again, he'd have to be very careful when he visited Sasha and Connie.

'Sorry, I need some air.' He bowed his head as he let go, and she nodded with a smile, watching him go safely under the impression he would come back.

The night air was bitingly cold, but the sky was cloudless, and in the mountains the stars shone down with a fierceness Hed rarely seen before leaving the walls. The moon, halfway through its cycle, was more light than not and it cast the entire village in its pale blue light, bouncing off the snow with a shimmer of crystal. It was, for lack of a better phrase, beautiful. Eren leant back against the barn wall, listening to the hum of the party inside, the high whine of the string instruments from the now drunk band, the footfalls of all those dancing.

He contemplated leaving as he had done every day since reaching Shina. Connie and Sasha couldn't complain, and Armin would be sore that he didn't say goodbye but it would pass quickly. Jean would probably think his suspicions confirmed, that he was in love with the other's woman, that Eren Jaeger wanted something he had, like some snot nosed child.

He shoved his hands in to the trouser pockets, trying to ignore the goose flesh climbing his arms.


He runs his hands up from her wrist, past the elbow and up to the shoulder, then all the way back down, over and over until his rough hands are furnaces and the chatter of her teeth stops. 'Come on, humanity's strongest woman.'

'Strongest.' She grunts. 'Not warmest.'

He clicks his tongue and pulls her closer, letting her bury her head in his chest. 'We should go back now. Before we're missed.'

'Are you saying you'd rather be warm than kiss me, Eren?'

Her cheeks take all the warmth left in her body. They've never really admitted to it out loud, to the kisses that kill time some nights. Stupid as it is neither has expressed a fondness for it.

He swallows. 'Mikasa...'

'No. It's okay.' She steals back her arms. 'I'm... We should.'

'Yeah.'

'Goodnight, Eren.'

It seems suddenly a lot colder.


Jean ran his thumb in calming little circles over her knuckles as they danced a slow back and forth. His eyes were lost to the waves of black hair that bobbed with every turn, or the curve of her pale neck where it met her shoulder. 'You look beautiful.' He sighed, as if the confession had never been meant for her ears.

She rand a hand down one of the suspender steaps, twanging it against the hard slope of his chest. 'You clean up well too, Kirstein.'

The door to the barn opened with a bang, and silhouetted by the white snow was the very cold, very tired and very grumpy Levi, his eyes ringed with a black shadow. 'Sorry to interrupt. Apparently this couldn't wait.'

He walked forward to Sasha who was standing with her hands at her hips. 'Yes, yes, you look lovely.' He murmured, brushing her aside. 'I'm very happy for you two. Now where's Armin?'

'Here sir!' The drunken blonde detached himself from the rather large red headed lady he was dancing with and gave Levi a sloppy salute.

'Tch. You'll have to do. Hange needs you back as soon as you can be. Without you and Kirstein they've got her tied up in knots in the courts. She won't tell me why though.' he dropped his voice and the music picked back up as those with no interest in politics or the grouchy short man in uniform drifted away. 'Just said to keep Ymir and Eren out of the picture.'

Jean approached with Mikasa's hand clasped tightly.

'Ah, sorry really, but they aren't my orders.' He shrugged. 'Hange needs you. I rode here in two days and you had better get back in one.'

'We'll leave in the morning...' Mikasa began, but a suddenly sober Armin shook his head.

'She's asked for Jean and I. We'll leave now. Mikasa, if what I think is happening is happening I'd feel safer if you were with Eren and Ymir.'

Jean stiffened. 'Are you staying?' He turned to Levi who squared his jaw and nodded. 'Well...'

Levi frowned. 'I suppose I should tell you, my orders were to keep Ackerman here.'

'Levi...' She hissed.

'Oi,' Connie stumbled forward, poking a finger at his superior's chest. 'You stealing our guests?'

'I'm sorry about my husband.' Sasha covered her eyes with one hand. 'He's a bit overexcited.'

Once they had packed and loaded their horses, Armin and Jean said their farewells. He kissed her on the forehead but it was brisk and hard, while Armin pulled her in for a deep hug. 'You look beautiful Mi.' He mumbled, and then he took Eren in for a rough back clapping hug that caught the titan shifter off guard.

Watching them go Levi raised his mug of wine before downing it in one. 'Well. Let's not waste the wedding,' he smiled and turned to head back in to the din of the barn. Sasha and Connie followed, leaving the pair stood fast in the snow.

He eyed her cautiously, trying to ignore the little hum of excitement in his gut. 'Mikasa.' He sighed. 'I realise I've not been the best company lately...'

'It's okay Eren.' She turned and began to walk back through the snow, rubbing her hands up and down her own shoulders as she did.

'No it's not.' He shouted, hand running through his own hair. 'I'm an idiot. I've been an idiot. I should be happy for you. I should let you be happy.'

She turned, her eyes slightly wider but otherwise composed. 'What are you saying?' She barely whispered.

He cleared his throat. 'I'm saying...'

'Oi! Mikasa!' Ymir shouted from the door, grinning like a cat from ear to ear. 'I've got money on you verses this county farmer in an arm wrestle, so get in here and make it good.' She disappeared With a cackle.

'I need to go.' Mikasa gestured behind her, the other reaching for the phantom scarf ends. Before falling to her chest.

'I'm sorry, you know.' He croaked. 'That I didn't pick it up.'

In her chest her heart gave a very loud thathump, it send all the blood in her body rushing up to her ears.

She turned on her heel and stomped back to the barn, to the wedding of a friend, to an arm wrestle against a complete stranger.


As weddings went, Sasha and Connie's had been a good one. The guests had left their mark on the venue, with decorations scattered around the floor and food crushed undertoe. A few had slept where they'd fallen, curled around their cup or face down in the table, but now most had retreated to their homes.

Eren said his goodbyes to the couple, who were still swaying in each others arms even after the last melancholic love song had died on the last singing drunk's lips. They waved him off with muttered thanks and slurred praises, and when he left the barn he heard Connie tell Sasha in no uncertain terms, that the depth of his love was deeper than her stomach.

He'd stretched it out as long as he could, staying long past the last guest had fallen asleep, but still once he'd closed the bedroom door behind himself he felt at a loss, too wired to end the night already. He paced and sat at the edge of the bed only to pace again, all the while thinking it over. He'd seen the girl with blue eyes and honey coloured hair dancing with other men all night but looking only at him. He knew if he had said she'd be there right now, happily making him forget all about dark hair and dark eyes and smiles that told a thousand emotions in the smallest of movements.

He made up his mind sometime past three, when the stars had been eclipsed by a blanket if cloud and he could barely see as he stumbled out in to the hallway. Her door was aglow with the faint outline of candlelight and he felt suddenly very nauseas. He stopped just short, raised his hand but could not bring it to touch the wood. Inside the room a floorboard shifted, and his hand dropped to his side.

A wedge of light shone out in to the hallway, almost blinding him as he tried to look at her. She was still wearing the dress, though her hair had lost some of its earlier neatness and had adopted a thick wavy texture that looked wilder, stronger. She opened her mouth to speak but changed her mind and waited for him, and in his trance Eren could only open his mouth once or twice and then shake his head.

'I don't know what I'm doing here.' He admitted, reaching up to cup a hand over his neck. 'I shouldn't be I just wanted to... Wanted to see you...'

She blinked, and her chest shuddered beneath the cream fabric as she took in his appearance, his expression. 'I don't want to do this to him.' She said, but she moved aside all the same, and slowly he walked forward, taking in the small guest room, and turning to wait for her to look at him.

Mikasa closed the door then laid her forehead upon it.

'I can't help it. I want to...' She sighed, and then stopped breathing. His hands worked around her elbows, then up to her shoulders, and she could feel his breath against the skin of her neck and ear. 'Eren.' She moaned, and her body leant back against him even if she didn't tell it to.

It was strange, he had to concede. He had not really planned the touch, but more watched his own hands move to her. Moving her hair to the other side of her neck was a conscious decision, but kissing the edge of her jaw was not, and circling a hand around to press against her hip certainly wasn't.

Mikasa twisted in his arms, eyes darker as she pressed her trembling lips to his, then twisted fully and placed her cold hands on the hot skin of his neck and then shoulders. Her lips were soft, much softer than his, and he found himself wondering deep at the back of his brain if it was because of all the kisses Jean had been privy to, the ones he'd missed for his stubborn nature, his error in judgement. You see, the ale in his stomach told him, they should have all been his. He didn't deserve them, but how could they have been given to someone else.

She pulled him down by the collar of the shirt, her hand fisted in the cool white cotton as his smoothed over the cream of the dress, tongue eager as it danced against her own. He stumbled back to the bed, awkwardly pulling her with him until he pulled back, his hands climbing back to sit on her shoulders where he softly spun her around.

His fingers shook as he found the soft white buttons of the dress and began to undo them, his hand moving down slowly as his breaths raced. She was frozen under his touch, and he could see over her shoulder to her hands clasped tightly at her chest, but he persisted, fingers skimming the soft lace of her underwear and the porcelain skin of her back. He helped lower the sleeves, dragging them further down her shoulders, thumbs skimming the small scars there. She bit her lip and pushed a hand to her stomach, keeping the dress in place as he turned her back to face him.

Wit th their eyes locked she let it drop, then without looking down she set upon his buttons, fingers working quickly but not rushing. He watched her, scanned the slope of her breasts, the still taught muscles of her stomach and then watched the little flex of muscles just above her collar bone as she undone each and every button. With a final pop she moved the shirt down his arms, up and over his wrists, and then let it fall to the floor behind him. Her fingers ghosted over the tense muscles of his abdomen, up to his ribs, then back down to the laces of his black pants, and now she looked up at him, watching as he sucked in deep breaths, as his chest heaved with want or resistance or anticipation. Her own was no different, and her heart fluttered faster than she'd ever felt it, pounding away at the breast bone, trying so hard to break out.

Because how easy would this be if they were both heartless?

He let a deep sigh slip from his straight lips and raised a hand to her cheek where his fingers traced the small pink-silver scar he had given her so long ago. His other hand came down to brush the off white lace underwear, following her curves down to rest on her hip. 'This.' He whispered, 'is significantly nicer than the old regulation stuff.'

She graced him with a smile then, a little wrinkle forming at the bridge of her nose, and he found himself leaning down to capture her lips once more. She finished with his laces and he sat at the edge of the bed, pulling her with him so they could both lie back, their lips clashing with loud smacks, his large hands roaming over ever inch of skin. She pulled his trousers away without breaking from the kiss, and not to be outdone he reached for the back of her bra, but upon failing yanked down the front lace with a small growl against her lips, and dipped his head to kiss his way down until his lips closed around the soft peach skin of her nipple.

She bucked but a hand at her hip soother her, and she relaxed in to an arched back, her hand winding through his short dark hair as he pulled and sucked and kissed all upon her chest, and when he was finally done she yanked him upwards for another breathless kiss, this time moving so that she was straddling his lap, the thin cotton lace the only thing between them as they pressed themselves together.

Eren un clipped the back of the bra, and she could feel him smile through the kiss as it fell away between them. He rolled her to the side and hooked his fingers under the lace pants, and smiled once more as she panted against his mouth while he slid them down over her thighs and knees. He broke the kiss to reach down and slip them over her ankles, his eyes scanning the bumps and scars training had left over her, marks that it could never have left on him. She sat up on her elbows, breasts rising and falling with slow deliberate breaths, and when he returned to kneel between her thighs she held his gaze. He ran a hand from her ankle to her knee until her leg relaxed, then he took her thigh and held it high against his hip, still watching her intently.

She licked her lips, then pulled them in to a straight line as she watched him position himself against her, a distant hint of pressure teasing the soft pink flesh. He took her hand in his free one, raising the palm to his lips and kissing it softly as he pushed inside her. Mikasa let her head drop back, gritting her teeth and spilling his name like a curse word as her fingers held fast to his cheek and then his own at her thigh. He moved slowly, every inch of friction savoured, every bump and ridge easily felt as he rocked his hips this way and that, watching her face for any reaction.

Then the dam broke, and his hands held fast around her ribs, holding her still as he slammed in to her while she muffled her cries and left teeth prints at her own knuckles. His mouth latched on to her chest again, one hand snaking to her lower back so he cold hold her to him while the other skimmed and stroked the breast his mouth had left unattended. Their position shifted, and he pulled her until she was on top of him and her hands forced him down to the flat of his back. With her hands on his chest she began to move, bringing her hips down in sharp ragged movements until one hand snaked down his stomach, her lithe fingers trailing around every muscle until she brought it to her own skin.

The look on his face made her dizzy as his hands came to rest at her hips, digging in to the flesh there so hard she would bruise. He watched in awe as she rubbed little circles against herself, and when her second hand left him to roam across her own breasts he looked downright possessed. His pupils were blown as he watched her, and though his hands were tight on her hips she felt no pull or comman in them.

Her breath hitched and she threw her head back, and in one fluid motion he had pulled her to him and bit a kiss to the delicate skin of her neck. She came around him, and she'd never felt anything so hot and hard or so completely filling. She clung to him with her knees, with her nails digging fast in to his shoulder blades. All the while he grunted against her skin, not finished and not relenting. Every snap of his hips against hers forced out a little gasp, a little wince of her name, and it was too much now, almost painful, but she held on. She felt it, a strange warmth spilling from him to her, radiating over her, dulling any ache and silencing her voice. He stilled, eyes screwed shut, and he only opened the, again when he felt her fingers soft against the skin of his cheek.

Mikasa's hair was splayed around her head, the curls patterned on the White pillow. Her eyes were full of concern as her thumb coaxed across his jaw and she watched him. He looked down, eyes roaming over the body he'd never thought he'd see again, the scars and the muscles and the soft bruises left by his fingertips. He offered a smile but it felt weak, even to him, so without moving from his space between her legs he lowered his head to hers, placing a lingering but chaste kiss against her flushed lips. He fell to the side, hand on her hip making sure she followed, and they pressed themselves together as tightly as they could, careful not to stop between kisses or else the guilt become too loud.