Castle walked home after breaking up with Michaela. Strangely (not really) Michaela was farthest from his mind. He couldn't stop thinking about Kate and how beautiful she looked. Which sadly broke his heart because he was hoping she felt as bad as he did. He wanted her to have quit her job and got fat and maybe become a cat lady. Admittedly, that picture was not pretty and a little pathetic but he can't help but want her to feel as much pain as him. But she was beautiful tonight, definitely a sight for his soar eyes (heart).

She still dressed how he remembered. She wore a green dress shirt that hung loosely around her waist and her favorite leather jacket. Tight denim skinny jeans with knee high black leather boots. And even though it was a simple outfit she still look magnificent. He couldn't help but smile because she had him hooked with that simple hair flip when she bumped into him.

His smile quickly faded when he remembered what happened. When the pain abruptly came rushing back to his heart. But he still loved her and he knows that he's pathetic because she doesn't feel the same and it's been two years but he loves her nonetheless. He knows why he's still been holding on after all this time but maybe now he can let go.

When he arrives home Martha and Alexis immediately spot that something's wrong.

"How'd it go dad? Did they not want you there?" Alexis asked giving her father a hug.

"No it's not that. I think Ryan texted me the wrong time."

"Then what is it Richard? Was she there?" Martha cut in.

Castle shook his head walking over to the couch and sighed. He looked so empty, lost, defeated, broken. It was breaking the hearts of his family to see him this way. But they had no idea how it felt to actually feel what he portrayed. He was feeling lost, empty, defeated, and broken. But he doesn't want to feel it anymore.

"Did you speak to her?"

"Did she say anything to you?"

"No and no. But I did speak briefly to her boyfriend. Guys this is the first time I laid eyes on her for two years." He let that sink in before continuing. "You guys should've seen her she was absolutely breathtaking. And I'm still in love with her."

"What are you gonna do?" Alexis asked.

"I want to see her again. Sit down and talk maybe. I want closure. I'm tired of feeling like this guys. I want to move on."

Martha smiled sweetly at her son while she have him a hug. "Call her. I know she wants to see you."

"Hopefully."


What Kate woke up the next morning her throat was dry from a lack of water and when she tried to get out of bed her body was weak. She was able to make it to the bathroom and when she looked at herself in the mirror her eyes were puffy and red and she could see dry tear stains still sitting on her cheeks.

She could try to cover up the evidence of her episode with make up but she knew Lanie would see through her. Instead of focusing on that she tried to regain her strength with some water and some breakfast still trying not to wake up Greg.

Kate was hungry but she couldn't eat because of the unexpected guest that came back into her life last night. It's been two years since she seen him last, it was so overwhelming she didn't know how to handle it. Although she's tried to move on countless times she never really got over him and seeing him last night just reignited all the feelings she's tried to forget. She wants to see him again, she wants to know how he's been after all this time,if he's still angry with her, if they could Rekindle their friendship. she's not at the precinct anymore so they can't be partners but it doesn't mean they cant be friends.

Who is she kidding? They can't be friends they never were. Even if they weren't together it was always a little more than friendship. And she still has those feelings. She still loves him after all this time. she never stopped she couldn't even if she tried, but she could never tell him because it's too late it's two years too late, she should've stayed when he told her to leave but instead she took the cowards way out and she left. All this heart ache she has she bought on herself and on him and even though she wants to see him she couldn't because that'd be too painful.

When she heard Greg walk into the kitchen she prepared herself for the inevitable pestering questions. He doesn't know her well enough to know that she doesn't open up very easily so she won't let on that something is wrong even though all the evidence that something is wrong is right on her face. But Kate Beckett is stubborn and she'll deny it with everything she has.

"Hey babe," he greeted entering the kitchen. "Are you okay?"

There's question one she thought. "I'm fine just a little tired."

"Are you sure? You seemed pretty upset last night."

Kate rolled her eyes already annoyed with his pestering. "Yeah I was just caught off guard."

"Kate we don't have to talk about if you don't want to. But I know it has something to do with Castle want to tell me about him?"Greg obviously caught onto her being distant with this topic but he knew the only way to help her was to talk about it.

"No I don't want to talk about it! Please just leave it alone."

"I'm just trying to help you please tell me what happened with Castle."

"Nothing happened with Castle," she yelled. Technically she didn't lie, nothing happened with Castle. But that's just the thing that drove them away from each other.

"Do you want to talk about this later or not at all?" He's getting frustrated now not only because she won't talk but because he's curious about what actually did happen with Castle. And he knows he'll never find out this way.

"I don't want talk about it at all Greg." She asserted. "Look it's nothing you need to worry about I'm fine and we have a big day ahead of us so why don't we just get ready for that."

She's being distant and rude and she knows this, but she can't help it it's what she does, it's in her nature. The only person she know she can truly open with is Castle but she hasn't seen him in two years or talked to him in two years and so the walls that she had definitely grew taller and stronger. Her relationship with Greg is still too fresh to discuss a hard topic like Castle, an emotional topic like Castle. Maybe she'll tell him when she's ready or maybe not. Most likely not.

They spent the rest of the morning in silence until Kate had to leave to meet Lanie at the morgue.

"Hey Lanie," Kate greeted her as she walked in.

"Hey girl. Are you ready?"

Lanie wanted Kate to come with her to her mothers house because she found out she Was pregnant and wants to go baby shopping with her mom. But Lanie and her mother haven't spoken to each other since she left for school 15 years ago. So coming home now is a big step in their relationship. It's possible that Lanie's mother doesn't even want to see her.

"Is something wrong? You don't seem like yourself."

Kate sighed as she settled into the car putting on her seat belt. She didn't want to talk about Greg but she didn't know if she should tell her about bumping into Castle either. Lanie had been so proud of her when she thought she was moving on and she doesn't think she could handle the look of disappointment if she told her about this.

"Earth to Kate," Lanie shouted bring Kate out of her thoughts.

Here goes nothing. "I bumped into him last night." That's all it took for silence to fill the air. "It's the first time I've laid eyes on him in two years."

"How do you feel?" She finally spoke.

"Drained. I throw up after seeing him. Guess I'm still recovering."

"Oh goodness. That's something I've never seen before. Did you talk to him?"

"No I just, stood there. I couldn't bring myself to say or do anything."

"Kate I think this is your chance. Chances like these don't happen. It was not a coincidence that you both happened to be at the same place," Lanie explained, her voice growing with enthusiasm.

"You're right it wasn't. Ryan invited him to dinner. Do you think that they all still talk to one another?"

"Yeah they do. Hell I talked to Castle the other day."

Kate's expression dropped. She wasn't surprised that they were still talking, they were his friends too, she just didn't expect Lanie to have talked to him. Especially while Kate was going through what she was (is) for so long.

"Why didn't you tell me? How is he? Is he okay? Is he seeing anyone? How did he act the last you spoke to him? Does he ever talk about me?"

"Whoa. Slow down! One question at a time."

Kate took a deep breath and asked the only important question. It's the only thing she needs to know. "Is he happy?"

"No."

Kate sat back on the seat. A part of her felt terrible. Was he not happy because of the incident two years ago? But another part of her liked the fact that he is as miserable as she is.

"His girlfriend cheated on him." Lanie continued. "Said he was going to meet her at serendipity yesterday."

"Girlfriend?"

"Don't you have a problem because I recall a certain FBI agent being yours?"

"Ugh Lanie that. He knows nothing."

"Greg is a nice guy."

"Greg's not him. Yes he is a nice guy but not the guy for me."

"So what are you gonna do?"

"I don't know."

"Well let me know when you figure it out."


Kate and Lanie didn't get back until late last night. Lanie and her mother are on better terms now. But Kate doesn't want to deal with Greg when she gets in.

She put the key in the door and slowly turned the knob so she wouldn't wake him up in case he was sleeping. No such luck.

"Hey babe welcome back," he said gently.

"Hi."

"Did you have a good time? You didn't have any trouble?"

He's being sweet and concerned and a good boyfriend. And here she is being an ass to him. He did nothing wrong.

"Yeah. Lanie's mother is just like Lanie. That's probably why they didn't get along." He laughed quietly at her joke. "I'm fine Greg really."

Greg walked over and gave her a hug and kiss. "Come on let's get you to bed."

He's sweet and caring but he's not Castle.


Castle woke up early the next morning because he couldn't sleep. He has too many ideas flashing through his head he figures he knows why, but he knows he's never going to use them for actual published book. He doesn't write books like that. Tragic romance novels.

He was sitting on his desk in front of his laptop but his phone starts to ring. He looked at the caller ID and found Gina on the other the end, this time he didn't procrastinate he answered right away.

"Hello Gina," Castle greeted.

"Rick what are you doing? You manuscript was do a month and a half ago."

"I'm working now okay. Is just that I hadn't been inspired to write anything lately."

"Lately? It's been two years since you had a bestseller. you need to get your act together I wont be able to cover for you much longer."

"I know. But thank you for covering for me as long as you have been. I got hit with a whole bunch of ideas last night and I'm writing them down as fast as I can so please give me another week or so."

"Yeah yeah I'll see what I can do. But you need this next book to sell or else you're gone. I'm sorry."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Can I switch up my genre of writing? Murder is not coming to me at the moment."

"It has to to crime in it somewhere Rick. That's why you signed with us, to be a crime novelist. It has to have that air of mystery."

"Alright I was just wondering. Thanks Gina," Castle said before hanging up.

Seeing her so suddenly last night got his juices flowing again. And all he wants to write is their story. But he doesn't know the ending yet. Once he gets that then he can add some twists and other details to make it a crime novel.

His cell phone beeped next to him.

'Book signing at Broadway Books today at two.'

It's the last book signing for the last Nikki Heat novel. It would've came out earlier but castle had writers block for a few months. That was until he sat down and forced himself to write, unfortunately, a happy ending for Nikki and Rook. It took everything in him but he got it done.

"Hey dad," Alexis said coming in and standing next to her father. "You're writing!"

"Yeah. Ever since last night ideas haven't stopped flowing through my head." It took a second for Castle to realize. "What're you doing here?"

"Oh you know. Just checking in..."

"Doing your laundry for free," he said with a giggle.

"Something like that," she leaned into his computer further curious as to what exactly he's writing. "What are you writing dad?"

"This is just a basic outline. This is the main story. I'll go back and add some type of case information. But this story between the characters is my focus right now."

"Well knowing you it'll be good. You're not procrastinating."

"I have until the end of the week."

Alexis smiled and shook her head at him. "There's my real father."

"Ha-ha."

Castle wrote for a few more hours before checking the time. 1:45pm. Why can't he ever make it to a book signing on time?


Greg let Kate sleep in a little longer today since for the last two days she's been extra tired. But when eleven o'clock hit he had to wake her in case she had plans.

"Hmm. Time is it?" She asked.

"Ten after."

She opened on eye and glared at him. "After what?"

"Eleven."

"I wish you'd woke me up a few minutes earlier. Don't you remember I'm supposed to take Jackson out today."

"Who's Jackson?"

"Ryan and Jenny's son," she said getting out of bed as stretching.

"You're cute in the morning."

She had to suppress a smile. She planned on breaking up with him today after she spent the day with Jackson.

"I'll go make you some coffee."

"No no need. I'm just gonna get dressed head over there to pick him up."

Kate got to Ryan's place about and half hour later. She needed to get out of that hotel as quickly as she could. Greg was driving her nuts with his niceness.

Kate and Jackson went to go see an early movie first before they went to lunch. Jackson was only four years old when Ryan and Jenny adopted him. These past few years have been excellent for his development and he's beginning to be a smart young man. He's six now about to turn seven.

"That movie was awesome!" Jackson yelled coming out of the theatre.

"Yeah I know. Especially the part where Steve flipped the truck and it hit Big Brain in the nose!"

"Yeah! That was the best part."

Kate checked her watch. 1:23pm. "Hey berry are you hungry? I'm supposed to take you to lunch."

"Uh-huh. Can I have a burger?"

"Only if you get fries too."

"Deal," Jackson said laughing.

Kate and Jackson never stopped talking the whole time. He was a very interesting little boy and Kate was anxious to know more about him.

She knew of a restaurant within walking distance so she took a hold of Jackson's hand to guide him down the block. It wasn't until she came across him that she stopped walking. Or rather a picture of him plastered to a book store's window. It said he was going to be there for a book signing at two. She checked her watch again. 1:45pm. She had time to peruse.

"Come on Berry. I wanna buy a book."

"You're gonna buy Rick's book?"

"What?" She asked breaking her gaze from castle's picture.

"That's Rick. Are you gonna buy his book?"

"How do you know Rick?"

"He's mommy and daddy's friend. I like him he's funny."

"Yeah I like him too. He's my favorite author," she said walking inside.

The first book she saw was 'Extinguished Heat.' It's the last Nikki Heat novel. It hurt to read it and to know that she no longer inspired him. That when she walked out of his life she took his inspiration with her.

She picked up the book and bought it. He would be there soon and she didn't want it to look like she was stalking him. That would only make their situation alot worse.

She took a hold of Jackson's hand again and when she looked back up he was standing there across the street stating at her. She stared back but this time he didn't look away. She was hoping she didn't have to see him again because seeing him the first time didn't elicit a good response.

He looked down at the ground before making his way towards her. Her heart began racing and beating erratically in her chest. Her palms started sweating and trembling so she shoved them in her pockets.

He stopped and stood right in front of her.

"Hi Rick!" Jackson exclaimed. "We just saw Monster Invader! And it was awesome."

"Oh man. I wanted to see that movie too." Kate smiled inside. Knowing Castle, that was real disappointment in his face. "Can you tell me about it later?"

"Mhmm," he said shaking his head yes ferociously. "This is Kate. She works for the police," he paused looked up at Kate then added, "you're her favorite author."

"Really? Kate never told that."

She didn't say anything she just stared at him not knowing whether or not it's okay to smile.

Rick checked his watch. "I've got about an half hour break in two hours. Meet me back here?"

"Okay," she said horsely.

I don't know about this chapter...it ran longer than anticipated.