Ok, this came out a LITTLE late…Ok, maybe more than a little! Sorry! Anyways, many people have been predicted about the future chapters, and have given me inspiration and ideas of what I could write in it. That's the reason I am taking so long, trying to adjust and prefect my ideas…Not really working though, is it?
You would have noticed that the chapter name is 'Guy Gossip'. Now, why is this? Many of you must have heard the term 'Girl Gossip' or more commonly referred to as 'Girl Chat', so I thought to myself and wondered why guys don't have one! I mean, it's just a stereotype about girls being all chatty and are excellent a gossiping, but honestly I believe that there are guys out there that also gossip. Now, I know one guy who is a constant reviewer, and he knows who he is, and he has to tell me whether my interpretation of 'Guy Gossip' is true.
I decided to test my 'Guy Gossip' theory on Drew Haydens and Gary Oak! Hahaha…My beautiful, lovely, green-haired flicker, and flirtatious brunette torture toys…*insert evil laugh*
Sorry for the awkwardness of the last chapter, I just couldn't get over that idea! And trust me, this story may seem depressing, but it will get funnier – like, no joke. If something goes terrible, it always gets better, right? So this will go from sad to funny, hopefully.
As for Drew, just saying, I figured he should be suspicious about May and her Mum in 'coma'. *cough* Drew would be suspicious because his parents are divorced so he may have some connection to what May is witnessing. Also, it didn't really make sense for May to be like 'coma' *cough* and then straight to *cough* appendicitis! So, that's why I decided that Drew would be suspicious. Anyways, here is chapter 7!
Sunday, at Drew's house – with Drew.
Drew twitched his eye as he read May's paragraph. What the hell? The expression 'lost the plot' was suddenly meaningful to Drew in a way it had never been before.
Was there even such a thing as Lady Grey Tea? Drew thought it was Earl Grey Tea. What was next? Young Master Grey Tea? Ralph Grey Tea? Earl Grey's Crossbred Dachshund Tea? To be served in the boudoir with a selection of breakfast delicacies? Jesus Christ, can't people just have a piece of toast before the paragraph actually starts? Did they have to live through their poncy breakfasts? The Maple household at breakfast time must have been even worse than Drew imagined, all fine china with little fingers extended.
Except May's Mum was in 'hospital' at the moment, so maybe Drew should go easy on how they were handling breakfast. Or that's what Drew thought.
What had gotten into May? She must have read Drew's email before she saw him near David Jones and she didn't seem to have any issue with Drew then. After that she went home and Drew copped up that tirade and that un-follow-able piece-of-shit paragraph. But why should Drew be surprised? She was a mess near David Jones. She could hardly have been stranger. Her Mum was in coma, or just drowsy, or sick with appendicitis, and, as her story was ducking and weaving, May seemed to be manoeuvring as if she was setting up to head-butt Gary. And then she was gone. Maybe it was something much worse than she couldn't explain. Maybe her Mum was mad on custard, all superheroed up and tinkling the ivories in some locked ward across town.
At the pool-side of Drew's apartment. (Drew and Gary) Gary in the pool, Drew outside the pool.
"Your pH is up a touch. Who looks after your pool?" Gary said indignantly as soon as his head surfaced for the first time.
"How can you tell it's up? Drew asked curiously.
"It's a feeling thing. Trust me, it's up. Not by too much, though." Gary replied, like a jaded star who had been asked that question too many times.
Drew flung the old tennis ball at the water, and it skidded off and into Gary's left hand. He threw it back to Drew. Gary had been working with his Dad, servicing pools at other blocks of units in the area. His father was off doing some quotes.
"Your Mum, she isn't too good today." Gary said, as the ball slapped his hand again.
"No, it's a roller-coaster ride up there on the 6th floor. Well, it would be if there were some high bits." Drew replied.
"You had to do it, though. You know he was a fake, so you had to let her know." Gary said referring to Cilan's fakery scheme. He took a look at the ball and tried to smooth down some wet fluff.
"Well, yeah. But I kind of liked it. There was this evil moment of triumph. He had been irritating me for a while so –"
"You had to let her know." Gary repeated. He hurled the ball flat against the water, it bounced high, hit Drew's thumb and Drew missed the catch on the second grab.
"Yeah, I guess. I prefer life when Mum isn't feeling like shit, though." Drew stated.
"Sure. And this is all about your life, isn't it? Not really about her. I hope she's aware it's having this negative impact on you. So, how about May Maple yesterday at David Jones?" Gary laughed, but the splash of the ball in front of his face stopped him, or at least interrupted him. Gary's head snapped back instinctively but he caught the ball cleanly in front of his nose and the water settled.
"Yeah, what was that about? The vague answers, the weird ducking around making herself shorter…" Drew commented.
"I didn't get to say this at the time…Since I had to go. But I think she's hot for you, man. She went all blotchy, just seeing you. I think she knows you don't like tall chicks and she wants you bad. She'd shrink for you, or at least crouch a lot." Gary giggled and threw the ball hard. It skimmed the water and once again, Drew didn't catch it cleanly.
"I thought we were talking about my Mum, and my selfish outlook of life." Drew's throw went wrong, and the ball bounced high and slowly and plopped on the water beside Gary.
"We were. And we're agreed. You're selfish, and you think your Mum should snap out of it because she is bringing the mood down. And now we've moved on, and it's about May Maple. About May Maple wanting a big, hot slice of the Drew." Gary smirked.
"That's highly unlikely. That whole definite article thing – I'm not sure it's how anyone's thinking." Drew knew the topic needed to be squashed quickly. And he didn't know when he became the Drew.
"She was going all dreamy-eyes and dizzy…" Gary stated.
"She was neither of those, and you know it. She was strange and maybe even disturbed, and her Mum could actually be quite sick. The way May treats me… It's a veneer of politeness on top of a big slab of inexplicable hatred. That's the extent of our relationship." Drew responded. Or maybe she liked Drew. Surely not. That was all Gary's idea – May Maple dreamy-eyed and dizzy and the sight of the Drew. OK, Drew had to get over that pretty quickly, particularly the part that went the Drew.
"I bet she emailed you last night!" Gary gave Drew a knowing look, tossing the ball from hand to hand, and the water was spinning off it.
"She had to email me last night, dickhead, and you know it." Drew rolled his eyes, recalling the tandem-story email.
"She just loves riding the tandem with her Drew…"
"You're insane. And that 'tall chicks' thing is insane, too. I would take them any height. I'd stand on a box if I had to. But not for the deeply disturbed May Maple. Could be drugs, Gary. You have to watch these kids." Drew protested.
"Sure. And it is usually the ones you least expect. I'm tanked on calcium hypochlorite most of the time. Not that it offers me much as a chemical." Gary snickered.
What would it be like for Drew, being in the pool with May Maple instead of Gary and a raggy old ball? A hot summer weekend day, late afternoon, the sun settling behind the buildings, the air still full of heat and the smell of cut grass, no one else around…
"Hey, calcium hypochlorite kills bugs. It lets us all swim in safety and gives your skin that fresh, flaky complexion. Something is really messing with May Maple's brain, though. I mean, last night's tandem-story paragraph…" Drew drifted off.
"Yeah?" Gary curiously urged for more detail.
"Did I miss the bit where Birch said that last night's paragraph should include a superhero cape, and upright piano and a yearning for custard?"
"She's working you hard. That's some great team play, tossing you that. What are you going to do with it?" Gary laughed.
"I'm going to have to take her down. No more Mister-Nice-Guy."
"What do you think is happening with her Mum?" Gary asked.
"Thanks. Right. I'm being a bastard. Selfish when it comes to my own Mum, thoughtless when it comes to her Mum. That's what you're saying, isn't it? Her Mum's sick – she's distracted. She was weird yesterday. Her story is weirder because her mind is stuck on her Mum."
"Don't weaken. You're going to be nice when you email her back, aren't you? I can read it now, all sickly sweet…" Gary continued to mock.
"Shit, no. It's only appendicitis. Her Mum will be fine. And we've got to get this story back on track. No mercy, Gary, no mercy."
As soon as Gary left, Drew returned to his apartment, or more specifically, his room. Stabs continuously attacked Drew's mind, stabs revolving around May Maple. Drew went directly to his laptop, and decided to read the paragraph once again.
OK, so Drew was a little embarrassed about the slight logical error with the whole 'Mad Eyes' thing, but Drew had bigger story issues in mind and what gave May the right to be so picky? What was she thinking, writing a paragraph like that? She was standing in the way of the story, blocking Drew's progress. Drew finally gained the initiative to type up his email.
Hello May,
Yes, thank you for that point about the 'Mad Eyes' name (clarified, see below). Thank you also for the gift of witless, un-fascinating Christopher and his penchant for custard. Superb. May I reciprocate with a character gift of my own?
Nice work with the tea, too. Let me know the instant another member of the Grey family comes up with a beverage of their own. Paragraph follows…
Drew
Max 'Mad Eyes' Eislander – only the dead had seen his eyes like that. Only the dead and Heinz 'Hands of Doom' Heckler – renegade, master of disguise and Eislander's nemesis. They had stood side by side in the secret service, taken on alliances together, but that had happened years ago. Eislander had been Kristof, and sometimes Christopher. But he had long since cast such masks aside. Heckler was damaged goods. He had turned to absinthe, had drowned his Mother's cat, named May, in a vat of custard – though that surely had been a good thing, since the creature was quite disturbed – and had gone away hallucinating. The things he said were vicious, and made no sense at all. There was trouble brewing, and Eislander had already been sent once to deal with it. For Eislander, Heckler was 'the one that got away'. But no more. The rush of the wind invigorated him, as did the firm pressure of a dozen thirty-round curved box magazines in his pockets. This was truly a day to kill. Heckler was out of control, worse than unpredictable, a warhead, a warhead with a timer set and running. And only Eislander could take him down.
PS – Not sure whether to go for 'masks' or 'masques', which perhaps could be more intriguing…await your thoughts, breath bated.
PPS – Is it possible that your part of the story might be seen as a little, or possibly extremely, dull?
Ok…I know, it isn't a long or decent sized chapter…Sorry!
As mentioned previously, I need feedback on the 'Guy Gossip' bit. MALES reading this chapter, could you please tell me whether my assumption of a MALE conversation was correct? Please, I must know so I can be prepared for future stories which include MALE conversations. Or, any FEMALES with knowledge and understanding of this topic, you can also tell me! I have a brother… But he isn't a reliable source of information, well he actually is, but I can't base this on ONE GUY.
You may have noticed some references from Drew's tandem paragraph. Drew mentioned that Heckler killed his own Mum's cat, which was named as MAY. Of course, Drew wanted revenge and thought he would do that to mock May and refer to her as being a dead cat.
Another thing mentioned would be 'The One That Got Away' by Katy Perry. It is a rather old song, but really good and catchy and rather meaningful.
Anyways, thanks for reading and reviewing!
