A/N Guys, if this sounds boring or if you can totally guess the conversation, I'm sorry but most of the conversations in this part actually did happen and I don't really know any other way to write it cause my creative juices are currently non-existent. Oh and if I disappear for longer than usual it's because my laptop is getting repaired :( Enjoy, and tell me what you guys think or any way I can improve :)


Chapter 7

Sara POV

Don't get me wrong, I really like Tegan and being her girlfriend would be absolutely amazing, I just don't know if it's the right idea. I'm not sure if I'm ready yet. I shift my position to look at her, speechless. I can't decide whether or not to say yes, or to tell her the truth. "What?" The words come out of my mouth before I can fully think it through.

I see her expression alter to one of disappointment and dismay. I want to explain everything to her but the word can't seem to come out of my mouth. I feel so bad and I can't imagine what this must sound like in her head.

"What do you mean what?" she asks quietly.

"I-I mean…" I don't even know where to start and the feeling overwhelms me. My heart and mind are contradicting. My heart says yes, but my mind says no. I don't know what to do so I find temporary comfort in hiding my face in her shoulder. I can tell Tegan doesn't really know what to do, and in her defense I probably wouldn't either. I may have just, in a way, 'rejected' her, yet I came to her for comfort. I sigh heavily and feel her hands wrap around and rest of my back.

"Sara I'm confused.." she says sounding downhearted.

"Me too," I say honestly.

"Why?"

"Because Tegan, It's not all that simple for me right now to be your girlfriend. I can't lose what I have with me parents and friends. Even the other day, my own mother yelled at me for being fine with gay people. Some of my friends think it's gross. What am I supposed to say to them?" getting a little frustrated soI stop before I go on a very long rant and lift my head up and my expression softens, "As I've said before Tee, I do like you, I just don't know what to do," I sigh again and go back to curling up in her lap, molding myself into her arms.

Tegan POV

So that's what's wrong. I didn't know it was eating her up so much and I feel so bad for pushing her.

I hold her tightly, "I'm sorry for pressuring you Sara, I didn't know it worried you so much. It's ok, I understand if you just want to be my friend." As much as I hate saying it, right now that's the only thing I can think of that would comfort her a at least a little bit.

She quickly looks at me, "No no, Tee, I don't want to be just your friend, I just… I don't know Tegan." She exhales loudly looking down. Just as I go to say something, she looks up again. "If I said yes, can we keep it a secret, for now?"

Though it's not the way I thought this would go, I'm still beaming as I nod my head. She leans in and whispers a 'thank you' before giving me a gentle kiss.

She leans back into my arms and I tell her, "Sara we can take it slow if you want, I'm ok with that."

"You're too nice Tegan," she tells me. I chuckle but I actually am serious. All I want to do is make her happy and comfortable in this relationship, but then again, I'd still like to ravish all of her, take her and claim her as mine.

We talk for a little bit more before my legs start to get numb and we stand up. We walk back home together, chatting entire way, and when we arrive, it's almost night time.

?

Sara POV

We get to Tegan's house and she shows me around. She picks up a Menu and asks me what I want for dinner. When the food comes, we dig in hungrily and then clean up.

"Waddya wanna do?" she asks me.

"Um... watch TV I guess?" "Sure, the remotes there, I'll set up the sofa bed."

I turn and get the TV remote and look at it for a second to figure out how it works. Without any warning something big and soft whacks my head almost causing me to crash into the table. I whip around and see Tegan holding another sofa cushion in her hand giving me a cheeky smile. She turns back and pulls out the sofa bed. Once I see the mattress has been pulled out completely, I run and tackle her with full force. We slam onto the mattress causing it to creak under the sudden weight. I attack her sides and we have a tickle war. Without any warning she flips me over and soon she takes control. Damn I didn't know she was so strong. Now I"m in between her knees as she tickles me to my death.

"Oh my god Tegan stop! Please!"

She takes a second to laugh at me and I use this opportunity to grab her face and attach my lips to hers. She stops tickling me and starts to sit back up, pulling me with her. "Mhm, okay," she says into the kiss. This time I slip my tongue between her lips and she lets me roam her mouth. The moment heats up and soon both our hands are exploring each other's bodies. At this point I realize that the curtains are open and anyone passing can see us. I break our kiss, but instead of stopping she moves her lips to my neck. She stars sucking and biting it, before soothing it with her tongue, bringing an unexpected moan out of me. I quickly realize I was supposed to be stopping and before she can do that again, I put my hands to her shoulders, slowly pushing her away. She looks at me with a confused and worried look and I reassure her, "Tee the curtains are open, not right now."

"Oh, whoops," she says with a grin, "Sorry couldn't help it."

I feel myself blush and I get up from the bed. "What are you doing?" "Change into something a little more comfy," I say grabbing my pajamas from my bag.

"Oh right," and Tegan goes upstairs to get changed too. I go to the bathroom to clean up and when I come out, she's already down making the bed. She fluffs up two pillows and throws a giant duvet onto the mattress. Imagine how fun it would be to land in that duvet pile. I run full speed towards Tegan and just as I'm about to hit her, I jump up while putting my hands on her shoulders to vault myself off Tegan and onto the sofa bed. I land with a bounce and turn my head to look at Tegan. "Holy Shit Sara! What the hell?! How the fuck did you do that?" "Just a trick I learned from my cousin," I laugh. I pat the space next to me and Tegan comes up to sit down. She lets the upper part of her body fall into my lap, "You scared me Sara," she grumbles.

"I'm sorry," leaning down to kiss her head. She stays in the same position, head lying in my lap as the two of us turn our attentions to the TV. I play with her hair as we watch Law and Order: SVU. After two episodes, I find myself getting bored. My attention switches to Tegan, who is now sitting up on my right side, and I kiss her shoulder, jaw, and then lips as she turns her head to me. I pull her closer by her neck and she comes to straddle my waist, sitting on my thighs. One of her hands grabs my waist, and the other one grabs the remote to turn the TV off. Again, her hands slip under my shirt and this time slides up and down my back. She moves her kisses from my lips to my cheek, slowly moving to my ear, nibbling at my earlobe. "May I?" she whispers as the grasps my shirt. I hesitate for a second, but nod, letting her lead me.

As my shirt comes off, I see Tegan staring with awe and hunger at the sight in front of her. My heart is beating fast as her hands come to feel me up and I'm don't think I'm ready to move this far, but I don't know how to tell her. She notices the worried look on my face and move her hands to my head, pulling me in for a kiss instead. "You're beautiful," she whispers, making my already blushing face turn a darker shade of red. After a short while, I think she notices my hesitation and stops. She grabs my shirt and helps me put it back on. I feel bad for making her stop, but we officially just got together today and I feel like it's too soon. I slump down onto her shoulder and hug her tight. She returns the hug and guides me to lie down next to her. She then grabs the duvet and pulls it up, covering us both. Tegan looks at me sheepishly, so I take her hand and pull it around me as I turn to face the other way, letting her be big spoon, hoping that she knows I don't blame her for anything. I intertwine our fingers and bring our hands up to my chest and snuggle into her, getting comfortable.

Tegan POV

I wanted to go slowly with Sara but my teenage hormones were not helping, and in the end Sara had to stop me. I felt guilty so I was happy when Sara wanted me to spoon her. With my hand by her chest, I feel how fast her heart is beating and instantly feel a little bit of shame. I kiss her shoulder, "Too far, I'm sorry," I say softly.

"Don't be Tegan," She kisses my hands and we both fall asleep in that exact position.