Just a reminder this chapter is rated M. I hope you enjoy I had fun writing it!


Three Weeks Later at Emily's Apartment

"Hey, come on in." Emily shut and latched the door behind Hotch. "I'm sorry to take your time away from Jack."

"Don't worry he's at a friend's for a campout."

"I'm jealous that sounds like fun." A buzzer went off. Emily scurried past Hotch into the kitchen. Hotch eagerly followed with the warm smells of Italian food luring him. "Hope you like lasagna?"

"Of course." Hotch leaned against the wall with his arms folded across his chest.

"I think I made enough for twenty people." Emily said setting the dish down. She started cutting the bread and putting it into a basket. She was so busied with getting everything ready, enough so that she didn't notice Hotch watching her every move with amusement. She eventually stopped to start taking stuff to the table, and she caught Hotch's eye. "What is that look for?" She remarked.

"It's entertaining to watch you do something other than profile."

Emily wasn't sure to feel flattered or embarrassed, "Well it's ready so you can have a seat if you like."

"I'll do better than that I'll help you carry it to the table."

"Ah, my hero." Emily said jokingly.

Dinner was filled with light conversation and an exchange of smiles and looks of a naturally felt affection. By the time they were finished, the dinner candles had burnt more than halfway down.

After dessert Emily started to avoid eye contact and made a conscious effort not to bite her nails. She let out a deep breath and said, "Well I had better get these washed." She stood up with a plate in her hand.

Before she continued into the kitchen, Hotch stopped her, knowing she was avoiding talking about her past as long as she could. "Emily, let's talk." She set her plate down and Hotch reached out his hand across the table for her to take. She put her hand in his and he led her over to the couch. They sat far enough from each other they could look at one another easily.

Emily bent her knees on the couch Indian style and sat sideways, to have a straight line view of Hotch. She pushed her hair behind her ears. She didn't waste much time before she jumped right in to it. "Do you remember when my friend Mathew died?"

"Yes." Hotch said listening intently with his stern face, knowing that the conversation was to hold seriousness and importance.

"Well the reason he was so special to me is because when I was a teenager I got pregnant. I couldn't tell my parents and at the time abortion was my only option out of it. Mathew went with me and stayed with me." She stopped trying to hold back the tears that sent a throbbing pressure behind her eyes.

Hotch looked down then back at her. She waited for him to say something but he didn't. He was waiting for her to continue so she did. "Because of me and the choice I made we weren't allowed to be part of the congregation at the church we attended. That's when Mathew's life went in a downhill spiral questioning the church and what he believed in and ultimately I blame myself for it, leading to his death." She stopped, and waited again for Hotch's response.

"Mathew's death was not your fault. Mathew's choices were his own. From what you just told me he wanted to be your friend and it seems he was the best kind you could have, sticking with you when times were tough. The abortion was your decision to make. It helped shape you as a person and helped you grow. Today you are a strong, determined woman, one that I find to be very attractive. I don't see a negative reflection of the choice you made."

"But what about Ian Doyle and Lauren? How could you…"

Hotch stopped her. "That time is gone and Ian Doyle is dead. It's understood the circumstances that go along with an undercover operation. I'm sure some part of you loved him as Lauren but not as Emily. You also were buried and then raised from the dead. What's important is that you remember the moments that make you feel alive."

She smiled with the realization of everything Hotch said, "You know more recently I've felt more alive than in the past. That is mostly because of you." She looks to her bedroom door and then back to Hotch. "But I always get drug back down into this dark hole. I'll have a bad dream or see or smell something that pulls everything back to the surface."

"And it always will but just by talking or forcing yourself to think of all the good will slowly change that." Hotch laughed. "You know I always think of Reid and how his intelligence is so amusing when he doesn't get the simplest things, or I'll remember Haley and how things were before her death and when we first met. Its things like that, that can bring a smile to my face and put away all the evil."

"I guess I never thought about how I'm not the only one who suffers from bad dreams, or who has a hard time keeping it together. I get so caught up with my baggage and become blind. Wow I just realized how stupid I've been, I'm not the only one who has problems. How could I be so self centered?"

Hotch leaned forward placing his hands on top her, "Just understand I don't judge you and neither does the team. I don't think less of you and one more thing don't let the death of those three kids in Arizona get to you. With time you will be okay, understanding that it wasn't your fault, just like you told me yesterday."

Emily smiled that beautiful smile and said, "I guess I should take my own advice."

To try and lighten the mood Hotch looked around and said, "I see your whole problem. No pictures, no color, no mess, no anything out of place." Hotch stands up and throws the couch pillows on the floor and starts putting things out of place.

"What are you doing?" She said surprised by his actions. She also let out a laugh at the thought that maybe he was right. He went to her room and she got off the couch and followed him. Hotch started pulling the sheets out from under the mattress and ruffling them up. "Aaron?" She couldn't keep herself from laughing.

Hotch finally got her bed messed up and then put his hands on his hips in satisfaction. "Never make your bed and never tuck the bottom of your sheets in, there's not enough room for your feet to move around."

"Are you finished?"

"Are you happy?" He shot back.

"Yes, quite as a matter of fact."

"Good." He ran over to her wrapping his hands around her waist. She let out a squeal of excitement as she was lifted off the floor and flung on her bed with Hotch landing on his back beside her. Hotch saw her grab her side and he quickly sat up. "I'm sorry I completely forgot about your side."

Before he had a chance to be embarrassed Emily grabbed the collar of his long sleeved, dark green shirt and pulled him back down. "Kiss me." She said, then she met his lips before he had a chance to speak. The all familiar taste sent a sensation through her body, the same sensation she had felt that rainy night in the park. She pulled Hotch down on top of her. He slipped his arms underneath her back raising her slightly off the bed. Emily wrapped her legs around Hotch's waist pulling him even closer.

Hotch took a breath and said in a whisper, "I love you Emily."

Emily ran her fingers through his hair breathing heavily, "I love you too."

Hotch softly began kissing her neck. Emily arched her back and her breathing intensified. She felt Hotch's hands slip under her shirt ultimately pushing the shirt above her head and off her arms. She couldn't resist the urge to feel his skin against hers and in return she grabbed the bottom of his shirt pulling it over top his head, tossing it to the floor. The scars of Foyet and Doyle are non-exsistent lost in each other's love.

Each pulled the other closer. Emily ran her hands down his back and down the front of his chest. Hotch kissed the side of her bust feeling the softness of her skin against his lips. He felt a pull on his hips forcing him even closer to her body. Their lips again met with an unending passion sending a rush of ecstasy through every fiber of their being.

Emily thrust herself into him releasing a slight moan. Hotch returned the feeling allowing his heightened member press against the outside of her black slacks. It was all they could stand before letting the moment overcome them with such intensity, pushing them over the edge in to what would be the most pleasurable night each had experienced in a long time.

For the first time these two lives would become one, filling the emptiness that had consumed them for too long.


A Week Later

Hotch and Emily are walking down the hall to Emily's apartment door. "Aaron what is the big surprise?"

"Just close your eyes and let me lead you. You'll see." Emily closed her eyes. She heard the door open to her apartment; Hotch pulled her in the doorway, in front of him. "Okay, open your eyes."

She was shocked to silence. Pictures lined the hallway of her friends, Sergio and happy memories of her childhood. She continued and made her way to the dining room/ living room. A colorful rug had been placed under the living room furniture adding color to the room. On her coffee table was an array of coloring books and children readers. Her entertainment center had a line of kid's movies and basket next to it filled with toy trucks and cars and legos. Flowers highlighted the middle of the dining room table with bold colors. Scenic pictures had been hung up on her walls.

Still rendered speechless she walked into the kitchen and found cereal, mac and cheese, and juices in the fridge. Her kitchen towels were now covered in sunflowers. She looked at Hotch with glistening eyes and her mouth gaping.

He couldn't help himself and grabbed her hand pulling her towards her bedroom. She entered the door way and found her curtains to be changed and bed sheets to be covered in a feminine pattern with bright colors. On her nightstand was a new lamp and a picture of her and Hotch. Pictures had also been hung in her room of various beautiful places.

"Do you like it?"

Emily was now letting the tears she was holding back fall.

Hotch thought for a moment she might have not approved, "If you don't like it I can put everything back like it was."

"No, I love it."

"I thought since you couldn't commit to buying a house that maybe making your apartment more than just black, brown, and gray might make it feel more like a home. I brought some of jack's stuff seeing as how we're going to be spending more time together. Your bathroom even looks different. I think it kind of makes the apartment come alive."

"It does. It doesn't even look like the same place." She dropped her head hiding her tears and then looks up. "Thank you. This is the best thing anyone has ever done for me."

Hotch wrapped his hands around her waist. "I don't deserve all the credit; I had a little help from Garcia and Jack."

"Of course." She smiled.

They both stood there standing looking at one another. This was a new beginning for Emily. All those bad memories and feelings were gone with her old apartment. In this moment this was the happiest and most alive she has ever felt. She wrapped her arms around him laying her head on his chest feeling his heart beat. "I love you Aaron."

He kissed the top of her head. "I love you too."


Well what did you think? I hope you liked it! Let me know and thanks for reading!