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Chapter 7
Frozen on the ground, my body split and burning in pain, I feel my spirit transfer from this body to the other. I shrink, my spirit forming into a little version of myself, landing facedown. In the other me's mind, it's just a cold, hollow room, with a large fire burning in the center and illuminating my new prison. The terrible, feminine side of me grins and presses her spirit against my own, smashing me down in her mind and forcing me to watch the unfolding events.
She smiles sweetly at Lux. "Hello, love," she murmurs suggestively. "I've waited a long time to say that."
He dives around her and picks up the lightsabers from my dead body, attaching them closely to the belt of his jacket, and I nod respectfully. Clever move, keeping her away from the weapons.
She shoots him a confused glance. "Lux, darling, what are you doing? I'm Ahsoka. You love me." When his cold expression doesn't change, she shrugs her cloak into a tighter position, emphasizing the curves of her body. "Don't you want me?" she purrs.
I gag, retching with disgust into her mind. Maybe I'll hit something and coat her brain in vomit.
When I turn back, my eyes widen with horror and fear. Lux's jaw has gone slack, his hands far from the lightsabers that will protect him. His eye's travel up and down the whore's body, trembling with apprehension and excitement. I can only imagine the ideas rocketing through his head right now, as the girl he loves offers him everything he wants. "LUX! Lux, stop! LUX, SHE'LL KILL YOU! AS SOON AS IT'S OVER SHE'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU IF YOU DO IT!" I shout, my voice echoing against the solid walls of my prison. Other Ahsoka's spirit frowns and smacks me into the wall.
Lux approaches slowly, placing his hands on her waist, and I scream with all my might. As he grows closer, I can see the expression in his eyes: hungry, hopeful, and desperately happy to believe every word she says.
I let my voice silence. He can't hear me and wouldn't listen if he could. A cold, cruel laugh echoes through the chamber, and I sink to my knees.
She won.
I will never be a great Jedi; never be strong enough to control my emotions. This me will wander as a whore, selling herself to gain power and making me watch from this hopeless room, until she can take over the galaxy and build herself an empire with her violent energies.
And Lux will be only the first to be ruined in her path of destruction.
I keep my eyes focused on his face, joyful and ecstatic. He draws closer to her face, his grip on her constant. Suddenly I see a flash of something spark through his eyes, and he freezes mere inches from her body.
"I want you, Ahsoka," he murmurs quietly, and she smiles sweetly at him. I hear a gasp, and the fire in the middle of the room grows brighter. Her gaze shifts, and mine does too, as she looks down to where a lightsaber cuts straight through her torso.
Lux's expression is determined, cold, and serious. "But you are not the girl I fell in love with," he hisses.
The lightsaber draws out of her body and back into Lux's pocket, the blade disappearing with a flash. The wound, already cauterized from the heat of the weapon, is still lethal, and she looks back up, smiling softly. "You win…Jedi," she murmurs at me, before collapsing on the floor. The fire in the center of my prison dims and burns itself out, dissipating into smoke.
A rushing sensation fills my ears, and I transfer back to my old body as her corpse returns to me, and my body sews back up. I gasp to life on the now-bloody floor, the pain in my torso returning: other than that, I think I'm okay.
Lux rushes over and kneels before me, helping me to sit up. "Ahsoka, thank goodness! Are you okay?" he asks quietly. I nod softly and slap him hard across the face before wrapping him in a tight hug.
When I release him, he glares at me, blood rushing to his cheeks. "What was that for?" he asks, his voice trembling with rage and fear. "The slap or the hug?" I ask him. He pauses for a moment and shakes his head. "I don't even know. I'm just glad you're okay," he says with a smile. He glances down at my neck, and I do too: there, just above my collarbone, is a jagged line, the only remnant of the few moments I was split in two.
I shiver and wrap my cloak around myself, covering the scar, and begin attempting to rise. Lux offers me his arm, gripping my shoulder to steady my sore, shaking body. The wound on my abdomen remains, making me stiff and unsure in my movements, and I wince at my efforts to stand up so quickly.
Breathing hard, I take one determined step after another and head for the door.
"Ahsoka, wait!" Lux calls behind me. I turn around, gripping the doorframe for support.
His expression is awkward, embarrassed, and he shuffles his feet, his arms crossed as he stares at the ground. "What I said to the evil you…I meant every word," he murmurs.
I look him up and down: no tingling sensation rushes through me. I don't feel faint. My heart isn't racing. His presence doesn't excite me the way it used to, and I look at the ground in shame. "I'm sorry, Lux, but everything on my side…I think it was all a result of her. I don't feel anything anymore," I tell him.
His face falls, and so does my heart. I feel terrible, but I am a Jedi. We couldn't have been together anyway, so it's better if there was no attachment anyway. "I'm very sorry," I say again. "I mean that."
He smirks. "I know that," he whispers. "You're nothing if not honest."
I sigh and return to him. "Oh, come on. We can still be friends. And if you ever need help, know there's a Jedi on your side," I tell him with a grin. He nods sadly, and I head back to my room to pack for our return to Coruscant. And, though it gives me no pleasure, I know I shouldn't visit Lux again before we go.
