A/N: Vivi here! Sorry if you guys are getting tired of the role play tests. I promise this is the last one! I wanted to send a big thank you to everyone who has read Internal Medicine, my first fic, which has just reached 11000 views! THANK YOU! It's so exciting to see that y'all like my writing as much as I like writing it! Anyway, let me know what you think of this chapter in the review box down below. Questions and comments are welcome! Please enjoy the latest chapter of Family Practice titled In the Days of Innocence.
Previously on Family Practice...
"Get some rest, Li. I'll wake you up in a few hours and we'll finish then, okay?" He asked, though his question sounded more like a statement.
"Is that an order?"
Dean rolled his eyes. "No. More of a friendly suggestion. I'll get the frozen veggies." He went back into the kitchen.
"Round three. In this corner, featherweight and hunter in training Allison Melissa Ligan. And in this corner," he motioned to the journal in his hand. "Who knows? A win in this round will get Ligan through her second round of tests, but a failure will render her a bunker nerd. Ready to go, Li?" Dean asked.
"How long have you been waiting to say that?" I asked flatly, a ghost of a smile on my lips. He'd woken me up a few minutes ago from a rather lengthy nap. Once I was upright, he wasted no time in beginning the final part of my 'strategy and lore' test. For that, I was glad. My stomach was calm for the time being, but I had a feeling that it would wake up soon.
"I plead the fifth." Dean smirked.
"Yeah, I'm ready. Let's get this over with." I figured Sam didn't need to be here for the last part. I wasn't sure where he'd gone to after I'd fallen asleep, but Dean and I were the only ones in the library at the moment.
"You, like many hunters, have a network of other hunters who you can call and who occasionally call you for help. One such person calls you up and passes along a case that they don't have time for in the near future. They text you some coordinates, but that's it. They didn't say what it was." Dean glanced up at me from his journal. "What's your first move?"
"I look up the coordinates, of course." I said. "Then I can start researching the area, see if it's a case worth going to."
"The coordinates lead to a large forest, a nation forest actually, where hikers can roam free range." Dean smirked at his attempted joke. "The area is full of bears, abandoned silver and gold mines, and mountains. More specifically, the coordinates point to a ridge a couple hours hike into the dense trees over rough terrain. The only people who go there are back country campers, folks who want to get off the grid for a while."
"I want to see if there have been any incidents there. Maybe call the local PD and see if they can tell me anything. I'll pose as a… let's say I'm a hiker new to the area and I want to know if it's safe for me to go camping there." I said.
"Well, the police tell you that sometimes when those hikers go off the grid, they don't come back. A lot of missing persons are chalked up to runaways in that town, but a few hikers filled out permits to camp there and never came back. Search parties didn't find anything but destroyed campsites and blood. Grizzlies, they tell you. 'Bout a dozen of them up there."
My eyes narrowed in confusion. "So a hunter sent me coordinates to a case of grizzly attacks in the back country?" I asked. Surely any hunter who had enough cases to pass one along would know the difference between a bear and a monster, right?
"Is that what you want to believe?" Dean asked.
"No." I paused, trying to figure out my next move. Maybe the hunter didn't know what was happening here and only saw the deaths in the paper. Maybe he was just guessing that it was not natural. Or maybe he sent the wrong coordinates. "I call the hunter back and ask why he thought something strange was happening."
"You can't reach the hunter." Dean said flatly.
"Fine." Maybe the internet had something for me. Conspiracy theories tended to follow the supernatural… "I search the internet for strange occurrences or missing persons in that town, then." I did not want to fail this test, even if he was trying to trick me and it turned out to just be bears. If I asked enough questions, surely the truth would turn up.
"There are a lot of missing persons in the town. Most of them reported by friends or family. Nothing particularly strange has been happening recently."
"I call several of the missing persons families."
"Of the seven people you call, four say their loved ones returned and they forgot to report it. Two of them say their kids told them ahead of time that they were running away and they just didn't believe them, but that they had since spoken to them on the phone. The last one says his family wasn't missing in the first place. They were attacked in a cabin deep in the woods and he was the only one to make it out. He was sure his parents were dead."
"Attacked?" I asked. "I want to talk to him again. Get more information."
"He doesn't want to talk to you anymore." Dean said. "You brought up some bad memories."
I sighed. "Fine. I go to the town and find him. I'm posing as a detective investigating the missing hikers."
"He lets you into his apartment but doesn't want to be the first to talk."
"I ask him what happened to his family."
"They were attacked back in '59. He says he was just a kid, sleeping on the floor of their cabin. He claims it was a grizzly attack."
"I ask him what the thing looked like. I don't know if I believe that it was a grizzly. Did he get a good look?"
"The man, Mr. Shaw, didn't get a good look. In fact, when you ask him what he saw, he says, and I quote, 'Nothing. It moved too fast to see.' He says it dragged his parents away kicking and screaming and let him go. Then, in creepy old man fashion, he flashes some skin and shows you a four fingered scar on his shoulder."
No. Did he really choose this one for my final test? I had the same scar. A wendigo scar. From when I helped rescue a de-aged Dean from two wendigoes a few months ago. Had he really intentionally brought that up again? Had he really just chosen a monster that I faced back when I was still... innocent? When I was still naive about hunting and thought myself untouchable? Had he intentionally decided to force me through those painful memories for the sake of a stupid test?
It must be a trick. Dean wasn't that cruel... was he?
"I ask him where the cabin was."
"Just a few miles from the ridge where the coordinates pointed." Dean said.
What else could it be? What else was fast and had claws and hunted people? Skinwalker, maybe. Black dog. Werewolf. The list went on. I would definitely need more info.
"Are there any recent missing hikers?" I asked.
"Who are you asking? Mr. Shaw?"
"No, I guess I call the ranger station."
"There you go. No, but a group of three went up just last week. The family of one of them has been pitching a fit about having no contact with their brother for three days, but the hikers aren't due back for another four. Ranger Wilkinson sounds very frustrated on the phone."
My stomach turned anxiously. The action surprised me and I gagged before I could hide it. Blood rushed to my face as I fought back the urge to spill what little was in my stomach. Poor Dean would be right in the crossfire.
"Whoa, Li. You okay?" Dean asked, leaning away from me. "Green is not your color."
"Shut up. I want to talk to the family." I said after a moment. Deep breaths… Deep breaths… This would be over soon and then I could go spend the rest of my free time in the bathroom.
"You sure you don't want to-"
"Dean. The family. What do they say?" I snapped.
"Suit yourself. Just don't up chuck on me. Let's see… The family consists of two brothers and a sister; one brother left a week ago and has been checking in via satellite phone very day. No parents, just the three of them. He's missed the last three check-ins and his sister has hired a hunter- a fuzzy forest critter hunter- to take them into the back country and look for him."
"I tell them I'm a ranger and tag along." I said. "Can't hurt, right?"
"The hunter doesn't like you, but he takes you to the ridge where the hikers went missing. The hike takes all day."
"Anything remarkable along the way?" I asked.
"Lots of birds and bugs making noise for most of the hike."
"And the rest of the hike?"
"Silence. Not a peep from any critter. Only sounds are coming from you and your posse."
"Is it the last part of the hike that gets quiet? Or is it in the middle?"
"The last hour. Complete silence."
"So there is something supernatural to this case." I said to myself. "Not just bears." I swallowed hard, trying to keep my stomach contents where they belonged. "Did we find the campsite or was it gone?"
"Your guide finds the campsite before you do. It's a mess. Torn tents, gear tossed all over, blood splattered on everything."
"I want to look around. Any interesting findings? In the campsite or around it?" I asked.
Dean met my eyes. "First off, if you're in the woods and it's silent, don't go anywhere alone. Second, if you're in the woods and you think there's a creature there too, don't go anywhere alone." His expression told me he was deadly serious.
"Okay. I'll make a mental note." I said, slightly taken aback by his intensity. This must have been one of his and Sam's more personal stories. I wondered if they lost someone because someone went off alone. I wondered if one of them got hurt…
He returned his attention to his journal and found his place. "You look around the camp with the others and find nothing special about it, other than the fact that all the tears are in sets of four and there are bloody claw marks on the trees. You and the guide circle the site and find signs that bodies were dragged, but no prints."
"Follow the drag marks."
"They end just a few feet from the campsite, but there's nothing there."
I looked to the ground, trying to collect my thoughts through the building nausea. Couldn't be a black dog then. Or a skinwalker for that matter. "Any bodies nearby?" I asked. Bodies without hearts would be a dead giveaway for werewolves.
"No."
I was pulling a blank. It seemed like the case just dead ended. Maybe I could go back once this little search party was called off and ask around some more…
"As you're looking through the site, your companions drop their gear, but you hold yours because if they saw what was in your bag you'd be in it deep. Suddenly, you hear someone yelling for help from a couple hundred yards away." Dean said. "What do you do?"
"Go to them, obviously. With a buddy, so I'm not alone." I added in the last sentence quickly so I wouldn't get failed due to 'poor strategy'.
"Everybody goes and runs to the sound. It stops and you can't find anything. When you return to the site, all the other packs, and the only satellite phone, are gone."
I blinked at him for moment. No werewolf would have the foresight to steal bags and corner their victims. Mostly they just ambushed. That's what Bobby told me at least… This was smart. It wanted to wall us off from help. And if it really was as fast as Mr. Shaw said it was, we didn't stand a chance out in the open. "I still have my bag, right?" I asked.
"Yes, you didn't want to leave it to be picked through by curious eyes. Always a good idea, by the way. Don't let civilians see in your purse."
"What's in it? Can I pick?" I asked.
"You have several guns with iron and silver rounds, a couple knives, again, iron and silver. Some flare guns, a first aid kit, ammunition. Maybe a bottle of water, canister of salt, rosary, and uh… granola bar or something." Dean said.
"That's perfect." I said, smiling. My smile faded quickly. "I, uh, make a circle of Anasazi symbols and tell everyone to stay inside." Please don't make me do the speech. Please don't make me do the speech…
"You're scaring the whole group. The guide thinks you're nuts." Dean said sharply. "They're gonna go back for the sound, try to find the person."
"Dean, I've never had to make the 'monsters are real' speech. Nobody told me how." I said, exasperated. What if he failed me over a bad, BS-ed speech?
"Make somethin' up, then. Just figure out how to make them stay in the circle."
I groaned. "Okay…"
"Pretend I'm the people you're trying to convince."
I looked up at him and bit my lip nervously. This scenario was getting too real. I felt the edge of something horrifying nipping at the back of my mind, but if I ignored it, it wasn't too bad. I just had to make it through this test and then I could flee and curl up alone for a while. "Okay, uh… You heard the voice, right? The one that seemed to come from nowhere?"
"Yeah."
"And we couldn't find your brother or the others because the marks on the ground ended without so much as a paw print?"
"Yup."
"I think we're dealing with something smarter than a bear. It's an incredible hunter, and fast too. It takes people. Carries them away to a kind of storage place, somewhere dark and hidden."
"Like a mountain lion? Lady, I'm having trouble following you."
This was harder than I thought. "Have you ever heard of demons? Werewolves? Vampires?"
"Yeah, in stories and movies."
"They're real. Not exactly like in the moves, though. The legends get some things wrong, but the creatures are real. I think what we're dealing with here is a…" I swallowed back another wave of nausea and my shoulder began to throb. Angry pulses tugged through my scars, bringing back the terrifying memories. "A wendigo."
Dean watched me for a moment and I wasn't sure if he was still acting or if he was really concerned about my behavior. "You seem upset. You okay?"
"The symbols will protect us. The thing can't cross over them. Just stay inside the circle and don't run if it starts calling out again, or growling. It can mimic a human voice." I said quickly, rubbing my shoulder and looking at the floor with tears forming in my eyes. This was not the kind of reaction I thought I'd have during this test. The terror, adrenaline, hopelessness of that mine came flooding back to me, building on the nausea in the pit of my stomach. It was overwhelming.
"No, Li. Hang on for a minute. You're acting funny. Something wrong?" Dean asked. Then a flash of realization lit up his face. "Is this about what happened a couple months ago?"
"I'm fine." I said, flashing my best fake smile at him. "Do the people decide to stay or should I keep talking?"
Dean's voice was softer than before when he answered. "They believe you, all but the guide. He only stays in because his client stays in. You survive the night."
"Great. It's easier to hunt in the daytime. I want to look for more claw marks on trees. You said the claw marks on the tents matched the ones on the trees. Maybe I can find a trail."
"Clever girl. You find a series of marks that lead away from the campsite. Are you bringing your crew or not?"
"Yes. I don't know how far the marks go and I don't want to leave them without protection." I said.
"The symbols are still good." Dean said, shrugging. "You could just tell them to stay put."
I felt the bitchface settle in place. "Really? You think they're gonna stay where I tell them to stay? No, they're coming with me."
"Good answer. You follow the trail for hours. The sun is starting to set when you stop and realize you are surrounded by clawed trees. The trail stops." Dean said dramatically.
"Just like that? What's around?" I asked, confused. Surely the claw marks didn't just stop in the middle of nowhere.
"Trees. Nothing but trees and rocks and hills as far as you can see."
"I guess we make camp then." I said, rubbing my stomach absently. Even though this was just a roleplay, and I was with Dean, safe in the bunker, the thought of spending another night in a forest with a wendigo made me tense up. The tension only served to goad my stomach into rolling and sloshing more than it had before.
Dean looked me up and down with worry on his face. Luckily, he only paused a moment before continuing the test. "As you're drawing the symbols, you hear a loud growl, followed by a weapon discharge and screaming. You look around and see the brother and sister safe behind you, but the guide is gone. What now?"
"Follow the screams. Try to find him." I whispered, closing my eyes. It was getting harder and harder to concentrate with this feeling in my stomach. "Maybe he'll lead us to the wendigo's hole-up."
"You follow the screams until they stop. There are no drag marks." Dean said. "Li, are you sure you can finish this? You're turning green again."
"Are there any claw marks? Anything out of the ordinary?" I asked quickly.
"No claw marks, but you see something shiny on the ground. Upon closer inspection, it's a bullet."
"Any more around?"
"Yes. You find a trail. Good ol' boy must've had them in his pockets when you started the hike."
"Follow the bullets, keep the people behind me." I said, clutching my stomach and resisting the urge to double over.
"The trail leads to a mine-"
"Dammit." I growled. No flashbacks. No flashbacks. "I make a circle for the siblings and go in alone. I bring the flares from the bag and a knife."
"It's a big mine."
"I follow the friggin' bullets."
"Li, I really think-"
"Finish this test, Winchester." I growled, glaring at him.
"Okay, okay. Cool your jets. The bullets lead you to a room in a lower level of the mine where you find several bodies hung from the ceiling with ropes. No sign of the creature."
"Is one of them the guide?" I asked. "And the brother?"
"You find both, but the guide is dead. His insides are, um, out."
I gagged at the visual and took several deep breaths. "Cut the brother down."
"He's unconscious."
"Well, I wake him up."
"He can barely stand. He's not coherent. You hear a growl from a mine passage above you." Dean said.
"Wait, no…" I could feel the rush coming. It was the same feeling whether I was awake or asleep. A nightmare was about to unfold. I wanted to reach out and hold onto Dean, to ground myself, but it was too late.
"Remember to stay inside the circle, even if you hear someone screaming for help. Even if it's Dean's voice." Sam warned as he threw a few more logs on the fire. We'd been searching for days in the woods around where Dean was taken and we'd had no luck in finding even a hint that he was nearby.
"Cas, please!" Something shouted, loud and clear from the trees around us. "Sam, help me!" It sounded just like Dean, but warped a little. Too low in pitch or too high when it spoke. Too rough and then too smooth. A cheap copy.
"Don't leave the circle." Sam warned, his eyes scanning the pitch black woods. Something rustled behind me and I whipped around. Sam followed the sound and Cas watched our backs. I caught a glimpse of a very pale streak as it seemed to fly over the ground just outside where the firelight illuminated the Anasazi symbol ring. I gasped and drew closer to Cas, pressing my back to his.
"Stay calm." Cas murmured. "It can't cross the symbols."
An object came flying at us from beyond the darkness. Sam knocked it out of the air. By the flickering light of the fire, we could all see that it was a boot.
An old, worn boot.
Dean's boot.
"No no no, stop." I whispered to myself, shuddering as I pressed my hands against the sides of my head. I'd relived this moment countless times in my nightmares, but never while I was awake. It was so much more vivid in consciousness.
We went to the next mine. I felt left out, having been told to sit outside in a circle of symbols. "Uh, hey Cas. I'm praying to you because I'm in the mine. Surprise. I found Dean's other boot behind a tree and I'm pretty sure the Wendigo is in here. I'm gonna keep going until I have to turn around, so come find me if you don't find anything. Thanks. Oh, and I have the extra blow tor-" I turned to look down the hall behind me and saw a figure where my headlamp went. It was tall and had no shoes.
But its eyes were bright white. I screamed as loud as I could and ran forward as fast as possible. The thing behind me howled and gave chase. A little ways up the tunnel, I could see a break in the wall. It looked like I could just fit through the crack; I hoped that the Wendigo couldn't.
Just before I slipped through the crack, the monster took a swipe at me, ripping through my three layers of clothes. I was out of its reach, but it was out of my sight before I was able to pull the trigger on my flare gun. I was breathing heavily, adrenaline pulsing through me as I wiggled my way further down the crack until it widened out into a small cavern.
I was trapped by a wendigo that had kidnapped and possibly killed my friend in a tiny cavern in an abandoned mine in the middle of the vast forest surrounding Centerville. No cell reception, no way to communicate with the guys except through one sided prayers to Cas. If he was even getting them; he was still so weak. I sat against the wall near the crack for a few minutes, taking in the pain – physical, emotional – that I was feeling. The wendigo was silent, so I had no idea whether or not it was still around. I only knew that it couldn't get to me in here.
"Please." I sobbed, begging my brain to stop replaying the memory. Breaths came in shallow gasps but I couldn't stop it. It couldn't stop any of it.
A soft scratching sound came from behind me. I turned around quickly, most of my energy zapped, and looked with my headlamp down into the pit where I thought the noise came from.
There was a muddy pile of clothes down there, pressed into a small dip in the wall. A green canvas jacket and maybe a black shirt in a little heap. Nothing that was big enough to hide Dean's six one frame. The drop off was about four feet so I jumped in, wincing at the pain in my legs, and walked to where the pile was. I was thinking maybe a small animal dragged Dean's clothes in here to make a nest.
The pile wiggled slightly and I took a step back. I thought I saw something pink in there somewhere… Wild animals don't usually have pink showing, unless it was a nose… I took a deep breath and tightened my ponytail before approaching the pile again.
I pulled the jacket off of the pile.
Two big green eyes looked up at me. Something strong pulled at my heartstrings and I fell to my knees in front of the pile of clothes. "D-Dean?" I stammered. The toddler before me whimpered and I saw his little bottom lip start to tremble. He said something that sounded like 'Li', like Ali without the 'a'. A huge, sad smile spread across my face; we'd found Dean.
"Dean," I cried out, my eyes squeezed shut and pouring tears. "Make it stop."
"It's okay. Breathe, Li." Dean said. He was suddenly beside me, arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer and rocking me gently. It hurt my back a little but then so did the shuddering, and he was holding me steady. He was holding me together. "Just breathe. You're here in the bunker. We're talking, we're safe. No monsters can get in here. Just breathe."
"A-are my ten seconds up? I-I help him to the wall and go f-f-find the wendigo. I shoot it with the flare gun a-and help the brother out. His s-siblings help me carry him to the road. Case dismissed, r-right?" I stammered, unable to open my eyes.
"Sounds like. Just relax, Li. Breathe four seconds in, eight out. Do it with me." Dean said softly, his voice steady and reassuring. I tried to breathe with him. I really did.
His tiny face was caked in dirt and snot and streaked with dried tears. He sat up and I could tell he was shivering. Hesitantly, I reached out and wiped some of the tears and dirt from his face. He leaned into my hand and started crying, sobbing loudly just like any other eighteen-month-old child would do. He was still loosely wrapped in a black t shirt but it was for a full grown man and provided little protection. I unzipped my coat and the jacket underneath and picked the child up. He didn't weight more than twenty-five pounds. I tucked him into the right side of my jacket and zipped it so that only his face was showing. I zipped the coat over that and shivered myself. He was freezing. His lips were even blue. I wondered how much longer he could have survived down in this pit, with the wendigo prowling around.
Like a bullet from a pistol, I burst from the crack. I sprinted as fast as I could while still keeping Dean with me. The corridor was so narrow that I had to run somewhat sideways to accommodate the extra width in my jacket.
An almighty roar erupted from deep within the mine.
I stifled a scream and pushed faster. I made it to where the tunnel widened out a little and was able to really haul. By then my calves burned and my lungs felt fit to burst, but I could hear its footsteps and that was a problem. It was getting so close I could hear it breathing by the time I passed the first fork in the tunnel I had come to earlier. Day light hit my face and I ran with renewed vigor. I made a hard right out of the mine and kept going until I heard Sam's flare gun go off and a massive howl rip through the trees. Dropping to my knees, I slid to a stop in the loose dirt. I let the flare gun and the flashlight fall from my hand. I hugged even Dean closer to me, cradling him, and cried tears of fear, anguish, loss… pain.
"Kole…" I sobbed, feeling the nearly scarred over rip in my heart tear open once again at the thought of my little boy, taken too soon. "Dean, please. Make it stop." I cried, holding onto him for dear life.
"It's okay. We're safe now. You're safe." Dean said gently, hugging me closer. "Nothing is going to hurt you here." I felt him start rubbing small, soothing circles over my back. The action accomplished its desired effect; I melted into him, letting the occasional residual sob out. Surely I was soaking his shirt with saltwater, but he didn't seem to mind. He just held me close and rubbed my back. He even started humming a song I didn't recognize at first. After a few minutes, I realized that it was the same one he'd hummed to me when I first arrived at the bunker, before I would even talk to the guys. He'd take his turn watching me and if I started to freak out or lose my sanity, he'd hum and rub my back until I calmed down.
It was moments like this that made me think Dean could be a great dad one day.
"You would have been a great mom." Sam whispered. I smiled to myself and let the heartache pulse through my chest; it was my constant lullaby nowadays.
The same held true even now. Heartache was such a consistent part of my life that I hardly even acknowledged it anymore. I really should tell the guys about the baby. Maybe that would help dull the pain.
But not yet. I couldn't tell them yet. I had to pass the tests first. No way was I going to be a bunker nerd. Then again, maybe they'd figure it out before I was able to tell them.
"Oh no." I gasped, pushing Dean away and clutching my stomach. I barely made it to the bathroom before my stomach emptied. The door slammed shut behind me.
A/N: Just so y'all are aware, Kole is the name of her son, whom she miscarried back in my story Internal Medicine. Curious? Internal Medicine is a great read. See for yourself. This chapter in Family Practice has flashbacks that originate from Chapter 9 (White Eyes) in Internal Medicine if you want to read the whole passage. But of course, don't forget to review this chapter before you go! See you next time.
