I do not own any of this. Except for the Story Line. And that Naked guy. Wait, didn't I already do this?

They flew up into the helicopter, going across the desert. Ayane held onto the artifact. "So then, this thing can make you teleport out of time?" Ayane asked, rubbing on it roughly. She was teleported. Kasumi grabbed the artifact, and rubbed on it hard too, in pursuit of Ayane. They both appeared in the past.

Both Kasumi and Ayane landed in the dirt. Meanwhile, Snake was piloting the chopper with Dante in shotgun. The artifact was slipping, until Hayabusa closed the door. "Shit! They got away! Close the door so the artifact doesn't go missing!" Ryu ordered. Hayate nodded, closing the doors. Link was hanging from the ledge of the helicopter, since that there was no more room in there. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" Link yelled out, nearly falling off.

Meanwhile, back in the Time Paradox...

"So, where the hell are we?" Kasumi asked. "Well, looks like we're in the past..." Ayane answered. "Really? Well, it seems so tranqui-" Kasumi was interrupted by the roar of a dinosaur. They ran into the bushes and hid while the dinosaur pushed through. Ayane pulled out her tanto, running towards the dinosaur. "That doesn't seem like such a good idea." Kasumi whispered, slapping her head. Ayane jumped onto the dinosaur, and stabbed it in the throat, knocking it down. A caveman appeared. "...Pretty lady!" He yelled out. Suddenly, Cavemen appeared everywhere, in awe. "What?" Ayane seemed rather annoyed from all the attention. "What? Why are you all staring at me like that?" She asked.

5 minutes later...

It was a bloodbath. Heads, Legs, Arms, Almost every limb was chopped off of the cavemen. "Good god..." Kasumi whispered again, still not moving from the bushes. "Dammit! Don't treat me like that again!" Ayane yelled out. She picked up the last Caveman on the throat. She raised up her tanto, and was getting ready to impale him in the throat. "Uh...Ayane..." Kasumi walked out of the bushes finally. "What?" She asked. "Well...uh...I don't think your supposed to kill things in a time paradox..." Kasumi explained. "Could have some dire consequences." "Oh...SHIT SHIT AND DOUBLE SHIT!" Ayane yelled out.

Back on the chopper...

"Well, what do we do now?" Ryu asked. "Try blowing on it..." Hayate answered, grabbing the artifact and blowing on it. Ayane and Kasumi appeared in the chopper. "Well now...I don't think anything happened." Ayane happily said. "Yay! We aren't going to die after all!" She yelled out. They landed back at home. Dante checked the basement. "No Combine here...I think you killed them by killing the Cavemen..." A shadowy figure appeared behind Dante. The door closed, and Dante was trapped. He looked behind him, only to be grabbed by the throat and hoisted up in the air. "Remember me?" He asked. Dante looked at him closely. He was Ganondorf. "You left me out there to rot!" He yelled out. "I thought I killed you!" Dante yelled out. "Good god! It was only 4 blows! Your about as stupid as a newbie fanfiction writer named Jamminsaladtard!" Ganondorf yelled out. "Doesn't that guy only have like, one crossover?" Dante asked. They both looked at the camera. "What the hell is that thing?" Ganondorf said, still choking Dante. "I think that's like...a camera in order to promote this thing." Dante explained. "Oh. Well back onto the subject. DIE!" Ganondorf yelled. "Okay. AGJARIPJAPJRPIAJI" Dante screamed in terror.

Ganondorf through Dante at the wall, releasing him. He aimed his hand at the wall, and made flames engulf the area. Ganondorf charged Dante, and Dante aimed his blade at Ganondorf's head. Ganondorf's Head went right through the sword, and Dante kicked Ganondorf off, sheathing Rebellion. However, Ganondorf's body was doing something weird. "What now?" Dante asked. Ganondorf's body transformed into Ganon, who let loose a giant yell. "Well, whatever it is, it doesn't look to friendly." Dante said. Ganon charged Dante again, but Dante caught onto Ganon's horns and they both collided through the wall. Dante climbed up onto Ganon's back, riding him. "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!" Dante yelled out. Ganon kept on colliding through walls. Meanwhile, upstairs, Hayate was reading his newspaper. When all of a sudden, his beer started to jiggle. "The fuck was that?" Hayate checked through his window, and saw Ganon crash out of the house, and coming out of the ground. "Shit...shit shit shit shit shit SHIT!" Dante yelled out. "Fuck..." Hayate said to himself, opening the window and then jumping out. He jumped onto Ganon. "Dante! What the hell is going on?!" Hayate yelled out. "Well, the thing is, there was this guy named Ganondorf, and he was this so called "Lord Of All Evil." And then I defeated him with one blow. But he transformed into this thing!" Dante yelled back, explaining the whole thing. "Well, I don't really understand how the hell he got into our basement, bu- WOAH! WTF?!" Hayate yelled. They were headed towards the river. They both jumped off as Ganon charged down the river. "Burn in hell...you psycotic son of a bitch..." Dante said to Ganon, as he drowned. "Ein!" A voice called out. Hitomi raced down the hill. "I saw you going down there! I never thought I'd find you here." Hitomi greeted. "Hitomi? What are you doing here?" Hayate had asked. "Well, I went down here in order to start a new life. Somebody burned down the dojo." She explained. "What? Who did it?" Hayate asked. "Remember those guys who tried to rob the dojo?" Hitomi asked.

Flashback

Robbers had appeared in the dojo. "Dammit! Put the money in the bag!" The robbers yelled out. "Uh, wrong way." Hitomi was laughing at the idiocy of the robbers. The robber that was ordering saw that he was facing the wrong way because he had no holes in his balaclava. (A/N Yeah, it means Ski Mask.) "Dammit Jerry! You should've put holes in that mask!" A robber yelled. "Well John, I feel asleep the whole ride!" Jerry yelled back. "Ya'll both are fuckin' idiots." The other robber yelled out.

Flashback over

"Well, yeah...they burned down the dojo." Hitomi said. "Those bastards..." Hayate said to himself, clenching his fist. "Hey, douchebags." Link went down. "Who's this guy?" Hitomi asked. "Well, call him "The Pussy" Of our household." Dante mocked Link. "DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!" Link yelled out, tackling down Dante. Dante however, had kicked Link in the balls, and put his fist in between Link's eyes, knocking him out. "I'll leave em' here." Dante said, pushing Link off of him and got up dusting himself off.

Back at the house...

"So...Hitomi's here too?" Kasumi asked. "Yeah...she moved too." Hayate answered. "Well now...I guess that's one more neigh-" Ayane was interrupted by the barge of the front door. Master Cheif walked through. "So, this is our new neighbor?" He asked. Hitomi was shocked by the height of him. "You look like..." Hitomi tried to piece the puzzle together. She was obviously thinking of Nicole. "Yeah...well...nice to meet you." Master Cheif put out his hand. Shaking hands with Hitomi.

7 hours later...

"So...how did you get that money?" Kasumi had asked Ayane. They were painting their nails. "Well..." She was getting ready to have another flashback.

Flashback

Hayate is pictured on the street in some very revealing clothing.

Flashback over

Ayane chuckled. "That's not really important..." She recalled.

Everything was being happily as it ever would be. Or is it?

Ryu had went down to go check the "Other" Basement, which he had never been in before. "Hmm...pretty strange down here..." He said. He walked through a couple of the rooms, until he came into one very high tech one. It had a VERY large machine hanging from the ceiling.

"Welcome...I am Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System...But you may call me..."

Cliffhanger for the suspense.