Looking Back And Ahead;;

"See this heart, Wont settle down, Like a child running scared from a clown, l'm terrified of what you'll do, my stomach screams just when I look at you, Run far away, So I can breath, Even though your far from suffocating me, I can't set my hopes to high, Cuz every hello ends with a goodbye." – Catch Me, by Demi Lovato.

Chapter 7;;

Here We Go Again;;

"Oh god…" Gabriella groaned as she separated from Troy's lips. She stared with shaking hands, and he pleaded desperately with his eyes for her not to run. He could see the horrific look in her eyes as she slowly inched back. "I…" Gabriella stuttered, eyes the size of moons as she stumbled on the bleachers. When her footing slipped on the metal Troy reached out but she only rushed away from his grasp quicker, like he was a disease. It hurt him, watching her watch him with that look. A look that said, get away from me.

But she kissed him.

He only willed and hoped for it to happen, she made the move. Why couldn't she just accept it? Why did she have to shrink away? Couldn't she just allow it to happen? Allow them to happen? She had to make it so goddamn hard for him. "Please, don't…"

"I…" Every inch of anger they were yelling about before had been burned to the ground and buried.

"Just…" He trailed off hopelessly. "Stay…"

"I..." She nodded stiffly, swallowing hard. What…? "Okay." Troy's mouth opened stupidly as he gawked. She was going to stay?

"Really?" He asked numbly, his voice raspy and scared, afraid she was only fucking with his emotions, playing some sick joke. Gabriella nodded her heavy head and Troy felt colossal waves of shock wash over him. He finally got what he wanted. Could it really be that easy? The mere thought of having all of her, finally, felt better than anything. He seemed like he was just handed a million dollars for no reason.

"But…" Gabriella's voice shook dangerously and she swallowed again. Troy felt himself inwardly cringe. He should of known there would some kind of catch. Was he really that quick to assume there was no but? "I need to know…" She trailed off as she watched his face fall, cyan eyes drained of color.

"Anything…" Troy nodded as easily as he could will himself. Fear moved through his veins for what was to come from her mouth. He couldn't decide whether it would be just bad, or absolutely horrible.

"Why did you ignore me…" His lids slid closed painfully as he thought back to the day he returned from the Bahamas. Thought about the night they kissed by the pole on the corner. The beginning, and the end of that little escapade. What had made him brush Gabriella off all that time seemed like a horrible illness to him now. He'd give anything and everything to go back, but it's really not that easy.

"Gabriella… Please don't make me say it again…" Troy tried painfully as he stared up at her. Admitting it under the street lamp that one Friday night was hard enough for him. He really didn't want to do it again. Troy Bolton was definitely a man, but he wasn't one that liked to talk about his feelings and show his vulnerability to the world.

"Just…" Gabriella's voice dripped with the pain and exasperation she felt those long two years. The wounds always begin to mend over time, but now they were ripped, fresh, and newly recalled. It was almost as painful for her to look Troy himself in the face, and ask, why? A fraction of her head wanted to shriek and yell at him. How can you love me if I didn't exist to you for two years?! How?! It just doesn't make sense Troy, and my heart cant handle your games anymore. Realization struck in her head as Gabriella realized, she really couldn't handle his heartbreak again. If she let him in and he hurt her… She wasn't so sure she'd be able to do it again. Maybe that was really why she was being so careful about them?

"Something…" Troy starts, his argument sounding gruff. He cleared his throat and pocketed his slick hands, gazing doubtfully up at her. "Something about you, Brie. There's just something, and right before eighth grade, it scared the shit out of me…" Gabriella held onto each word in her head, repeating them for some reason. Memory, you could say. Or, well, it was just easier to keep a hold of.

"If something about me is so special then why'd you let it go…?" Her voice bled a sharp tone of hostility that made Troy switch his eyes to the black sneakers on his feet. Gabriella didn't mean for it to come out that way, but what other way was there to put it? You can't pretend your happy about something like this.

"That's what I'm trying to say… I ran away from what I was afraid of. I ran away from the thought of loving you in eighth grade. So that's how it was. I pushed you away, to be forgotten while everyone else surrounded me, because I'm just the coolest guy in school. Everyone loves the basketball captain when he can't think about loving a girl. Couldn't even keep a hold of a beautiful girl." Troy sighed, scratching the back of his neck as he turned away from her. A fear rose in Gabriella's abdomen and she stared at his back with wide eyes.

"Troy?!"

"I'm not going anywhere, not this time." He called, not bothering to look over his shoulder as he retrieved the forgotten basketball. Gabriella sank down into the bleachers and put her head in-between her knees. Troy casts over a brief glance before taking a shot. She thinks this is hard? Imagine how I'm feeling.

"Sorry." Troy says loud enough for her to hear, but if she weren't controlling her breathing the way she was, there was no way it would have been heard. Lifting her head she shot him a look, pushing the hair away from her eyes. "I didn't realize how much I was freaking you out."

Rising from the bench Gabriella moved slowly down the shining wood floor. Each step down, she rose herself up. Everything would be all right; every secret and reason was out in the open now. Just take it slow, and go with what life brings you. Standing before Troy now, she wrung her hands, doing the best she could to stay composed. Why couldn't her heart ever settle down when she was around him?

"Hug?" It was like a peace offering at the end of war. In the true words of an 80's singer, Love is a battlefield. Troy nodded weakly and dropped the ball. He dropped the sport he's spent hours upon hours pouring sweat, blood, and tears into, and opened his arms for her. It was a true sign of progress. Things would only get better from here.

Hopefully.

"Thanks, Troy." Gabriella says quietly, her chin resting on his left broad shoulder. Troy's hand rubbed her back in response, his scarlet ring glinting under the fluorescing lights. He breathed in, enjoying the scent of her perfume and just the feeling of her against him. The way they held each other wasn't as intimate as before, but it was friendly with ease. The days ticking by to getting her back on his side started now.

Troy wouldn't fail this time.


"Boo." Troy said in a low husky voice, poking Gabriella's side.

"Troy!" She shrieked, knocking into him.

"How'd you know it was me?" He asks, cyan eyes shining with a wry smile playing on his lips as she turned around to face him.

"I think I know your voice by now."

"Oh, really…"

"Mmmm-humm."

"So. There's this party tonight."

"Keenan's right?" Gabriella ponders, shifting to get the rest of the stuff she'd need while they were talking.

"Yeah…" Troy said slowly, eyeing her up and down while she wasn't paying attention. The fuchsia halter-top she sported hung on her frame perfectly, tying behind her neck and stopping at her waistline. The dark wash skinny jeans hugged her curves and made her legs look a mile long, paired with silver Steve Madden sandals. Gabriella's soft curls framed her face beautifully, her bangs pushed back by a silver headband.

"Eh. Shar mentioned it, I might show up." She muses, turning to catch Troy staring. "Eyes up here, sweetie." She tilts his chin with her finger and puts one last book in her bag.

Troy clears his throat. "All right, see you there then."

"Bye, boo." Gabriella jokes, batting her mocha orbs as she patted his cheek. She walks off slinging her bag over her shoulder, casually swinging her hips as she caught up with Sharpay. Troy stared after her, cursing under his breath when he saw other guys watching her as she went too.


"Dude. Would you relax and just drink something?"

"Shut up, Chad." His ceruleans flicking in an eye roll as he leaned with his back carelessly up against the wall.

"Why are you so fidgety?" Chad asks, taking a swig from the beer he had been working on for a good ten minutes already.

"I don't know, Chad. I'm trying to take things slow for her, but I'm failing horribly."

"Fuck, man." Chad said, his face scrunching up. "You really must love her."

Troy's dark eyes shot daggers at Chad warningly in the dim lighting of the house party in full swing. "I need a drink."

"That's more like it." Chad brightens, downing the rest of his beer. "Two more coming up." While Chad went to go get two more drinks Troy surveyed the crowd. He hadn't seen any signs of Gabriella or any of her friends, so he figured she was still getting ready or something.

"Heeey, Troy." A blonde purred, dangerously pressing herself against him.

"Hi, uh, Cassie." He hoped he got her name right, but she'd better get the hell off him.

"How are you tonight, baby?" Her manicured nails ran down his chest, one resting on his belt buckle. Troy shifted, tensing when she gave his belt a blunt tug.

"Look." He said, wrapping his hand around her wrist and holding her hands between his. "I'm not interested."

"Who are you waiting for?" She whined, anxiously pushing against his hold. "Is it that stupid whore your dying to fuck?"

Troy normally is a nice guy; he tries to get the point across the easiest way when it comes to girls. But Cassie? She was pushing it, and he wasn't going to stand there and let her talk about Gabriella like she was trash.

"Get lost, bitch." Troy scoffed, releasing her with disgust.

"Asshole," Was her rebuttal, coming off barely audible in the loudness of the party.

He didn't even care.


"So," Taylor declared as she put the silver car into park, turning to her friend's dimly lit faces under the roof of the sedan. "To avoid any of those worse case scenarios," Taylor purposefully met dark chocolate eyes through the faint light and winked secretly. "Keep your phones on vibrate in your back pocket so you feel it if any of us need each other."

Chorusing they're yeses the three other girls in the car besides Taylor complied and switched they're phones onto vibrate. "Let's party." Sharpay's blond hair swung behind her back as she stood from the car and gave her fair-locks a fluff.

"Hairs fine," Gabriella muttered sweetly, walking past Sharpay to link her arm through Taylor's.

"How's mine?" Kelsey questioned, looking skeptically at Sharpay while tried desperate to give her short brown tendrils from volume.

"Wait." Sharpay said in a voice that made everyone freeze and direct all attention to her. Her French manicured nails moved quickly in a rush as they slid through Kelsey's locks and fluffed everything out. Her hair suddenly looked more full and lush, they were all amazed.

"How the hell-" Taylor started, her dark brown eyebrows hiked up in amusement as she stared.

"Do mine!" Gabriella giggled, unlacing her arm from Taylor's grip and throwing herself at the blond.

"Jeez, Gab. Don't make it sound like you want to be raped," Sharpay laughed, only needing to primp a couple of spots in Gabriella's shiny mane. Her natural Latina hair was already curly and had plenty of body, so it only needed a good fluff.

Taylor sighed in content and a little of mock anxiousness. "Now can we go?"


The music was racing through the tight air space of the house. Every being was pushed up against another, or the wall. The alcoholic scent was dwelling as it threaded through veins of many, a feeling of rush passing through the crowd. It was so compelling to just join in, get lost in the mob, and literally shake your ass. Gabriella couldn't stop herself; she was magnetically pulled to the spot cleared of furniture that was a makeshift dance floor. She didn't know the people pressing themselves close, but they didn't know her either so it didn't really matter. She just wanted to dance.

Closing her eyes blissfully her arms joined the sea of many others up in the air, floating thrillingly above them. But suddenly familiar warmth was pressed against her bum, and the hips grinding in tune with hers felt strangely familiar. Backing closer to the presence she felt, Gabriella turned her head to the side, sneaking a glance while keeping a cool serene around her vision. A musky and quite sexy smell enclosed her nostrils, suddenly informed her whom it was grinding behind her. She put more pressure on his groin, swaying more slowly.

A slightly tainted idea sparked up in Gabriella's head, and it made her start to wonder when she developed such a dirty mind. She dropped to the floor in a crouch and rose slowly, purposefully brushing against the tight spot in his pants. A deep moan groaned from the back of his throat and she smirked in success. Willingly she let him place his hands on her hips and guide her to the throbbing music.

"This is what I've been missing…" It wasn't really a question, but he could feel the mental nod from Gabriella's swaying body. She laughed blissfully and turned her face to the side as her right hand cupped his neck.

"This," She said, close enough to him that she didn't have to shout, her seductive tone heard loud and clear in his ears. "Is what you're not good enough for, Troy."

"Don't be so sure, Gabi," Troy spoke behind the lobe of her ear, his hot breath tickling her virgin skin as his tongue darted out to flick her ear. Gabriella was suddenly well aware how damp her panties felt. It was weird to her, she's never been this turned on before. Especially with Troy Bolton.

Soon their bodies slowed as the song came to a complete stop and new on was just starting. Gabriella tried not to let out a moan as Troy's hands skimmed her waist when she turned to face him. "Well hello."

"Hey there, baby." Troy smirked, pulling her closer.

"I need a drink," Gabriella said; enable to stop the smile tearing at her lips. "Do you want anything?"

"Beer please." Troy grinned, a tiny sense of tipsy glinting in his eyes.

"Kay, be right back." Gabriella said, readying herself to push through the crowd when she felt a soft smack on her butt. She spins in mock shock but Troy already had his back to her and was getting lost in the other side of teenagers.


"Troy..," She gasped as he bit her neck.

"Yeah…"

Both alcoholic levels were at an illegal state to operate a car, but somewhere in the foggy parts of they're minds they knew it was getting later and later. With every kiss though, both went back for more. It was intoxicating, the feeling of his lips on her, her lips on him. Finally Troy stopped three unbearable centimeters away from Gabriella's mouth and stared at her intently. Pushing her hands through the sides of his hair she smiled, staring back.

"We should go…" Troy said, a little more sober than she was, but that wasn't saying much.

"Mmm," Gabriella said, drunkenly leaning her forehead against his. "Daddy is gonna be maaaaad at meee." She giggled, her hands tugging Troy's belt loops closer to her.

"Fuck," Troy muttered, fishing his phone out of his pocket while Gabriella pressed intoxicated kisses to his neck. Troy wasn't one to protest when this beauty was kissing all over him, but he wasn't drunk enough to take advantage of her. Fucking up with this girl more now would only end him back in the doghouse when he was just barely getting out.

"Troy," Gabriella whined, pouting up at him.

"What, babe?" Troy said distractingly as his gleaming eyes caught sight of the time. Gabriella grabbed his jaw and pulled his neck down to her mouth, planting an open mouth kiss right on him. Pulling away to catch her breath her hands pushed up his shirt, roaming across the firmness of his chest while he tried to slow his breathing down.

"Since whens did you becomes the presponsible one?" She slurred, trying to lean back in for another kiss.

"Babe," Troy groaned, pulling her hands out of his shirt and taking the tiniest step back away from her. "Stop, its almost 1:30 in the morning. I need to get you home."

"Aw." Gabriella said, seemingly suddenly consumed in her thoughts with a considerate look covering her features.

"Gabriella?" Troy asks, fighting a laugh. She was a handful drunk.

"I don't think I'm sleeping at the house of where I live tonight, Troy." Gabriella says slowly, looking like she was trying really hard to think of something important.

"What?" Troy laughs quietly, not understanding what she was getting at.

"Oh! Oh! I got it! Me! Me!" Gabriella squirms under Troy's grasp, jumping up and down lightly.

"What, what is it?" He asks, releasing her hands and pushing the hair out of her face.

"I'm having a sleeps party with Pay!" She grins and wobbles a little on her feet. The alcohol must have really been kicking in now.

"Um. Right." Troy says, grabbing her elbow to keep her balance. "I guess your coming home with me then, Brie." He says, more to himself then the girl smiling like an idiot to herself in front on him and muttering something to her shoulder. Troy took her hand and tugged her down the hall of the dark house full of teenagers still partying.

"Troooooy," Gabriella pulled against his hold.

"Come on, Gabriella. We gotta go." He said, trying to take hold of her arm.

"But, but, but. I don't wanna leave." She shook her head, resembling a five-year-old child at a park. Troy raised an eyebrow; clearly amused by the attitude she was suddenly sprouting.

He leaned down to her ear, acting like he was going to tell her a secret. "If you come with me, I'll play doctor with you later." Okay, maybe it was a little sexual of him to say, but she wasn't really a kid. They were hormonal teenagers. Can you blame him? He had a nice amount of alcohol that night too, but not enough to send him into an unconscious realization of actions state. Gabriella on the other hand, not so much, she was shit faced.

A dramatic change of mood shadowed across Gabriella's face as she felt Troy's hot breath on her ear. "Troy…" She purred, grazing his jaw line with her hand. "Let's find a room upstairs…"

The amount of self control one teenage boy can hold without losing it was only so much. He could easily resist any broad throwing themselves at him, resist alcohol or drugs if he wasn't in the mood or anything like that. Troy wasn't an out of control person. Usually. Gabriella Montez seemed to have no problem at all challenged his beholden strength, though. Not one bit, because she was pushing him over the edge, and he was almost falling.

Mentally shaking himself, Troy straightened and surveyed the room for the nearest exit. He needed to get her to his house, or he was going to do something she would hate him for forever. "Come on," He said, giving her one quick kiss. "Make it to my car and I'll give you five more kisses."

Raising her eyebrows Gabriella obliged, her toffee eyes dancing with excitement as she followed his lead. Luckily after five more kissed, and an amazing amount of resistance, Troy carried Gabriella into his dark house. "Where're your parents?" She asked, squinting into the darkness, sounding a lot more with it now.

"Don't know, don't care." He says, starting his way down the dark hallway to a wooden door. Gabriella pecked the corner of his mouth and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I'm so tired…" She whispered, fighting against a yawn.

"Good." Troy muttered, placing her down on his bed after he kicked the door open. Gabriella sagged against his pillows, groaning and hugging her sides.

"Oh, fuck." She moaned, reaching out in the darkness to search for him.

"Brie, what's wrong?" Troy's panic was heavily threaded into his voice as he took her hand and supported her as she scooted to him.

"I'm gonna be sick," She managed, letting Troy guide her to the bathroom.

Holding her hair back as she puked the contents of her stomach into the white toilet bowl Troy felt helpless as ever. Finally Gabriella let up, wiping her mouth with her wrist she looked up at Troy with a disgusted expression. "Troy Bolton," She said, collapsing in a messy heap beside the toilet.

"Yeah, baby," Troy said softly, smoothing over her hair because he didn't know what else to do. He felt vulnerable watching her in evident pain.

"I fucking hate you for letting me drink so much."

Smiling the tiniest bit he lifted her to stand and poured mouth wash into a cup. "Just shut up and gargle," Her eyes narrowed into slits as she was suddenly sober as ever. She took the cup and let the minty contents swish around in her mouth. When she came up from spitting and caught Troy's eye in the mirror she glared again.

"What're you smiling about?"

"You're a fucking handful when you're drunk, Brie."

Her dark eyes rolled as she wiped her mouth off and turned to face him leaning in the doorway. "Sleep," She says, resting her forehead against his shoulder. "Sleep, now. Please."

"In that?" Troy asks, rubbing her back and motioning to her outfit of skinny jeans, boots and a purple tube top.

"Lose the shirt," She says, stepping back tiredly and pulling her boots off.

"Not on the first date, honey." Troy says jokingly, receiving daggers from Gabriella who didn't find it the least bit funny.

"Troy." She says, rubbing a hand over her face, the dark circles under her eyes showing too well.

"Okay, okay." He says, pulling his long sleeve Abercrombie shirt over his head. "Here."

"Thanks." Gabriella says, and in one quick motion her shirt was on the floor and the over sized green one covered the black strapless bra Troy managed to drool over in the quick five seconds it took her to change. Turning around Gabriella stepped out of her jeans and was glad to see the shirt at least covered her underwear. "Didn't your mother ever tell you it wasn't polite to stare?" She scooped up her clothes and brushed past Troy's open jaw into the dark bedroom where she dropped them in a corner.

"Yeah, and at the same time she told me sex was bad and shouldn't be but done unless you're married, but hey. You're the one ripping your clothes off."

"Shut up, Troy." Gabriella says, rolling her eyes.

"I love you, Sweetheart, but these mean words hurt me." Troy pulled the covers back on his bed and motioned for Gabriella to get in while he yawned. Gladly laying down Gabriella found comfort in the soft sheets smelling of Troy. Pulling the blankets up to her chin Troy tucked her in.

"Night, babe." He kissed his hand and patted her forehead with it, starting for his bedroom door.

Her small hand reached out and grabbed his wife beater as he made his retreat. "Troy, don't."

"Brie, almost all night you've been tempting me, I'm really not gonna sleep in a bed with you right now." He tried to laugh, but when he pulled her hand away from his shirt she interlocked they're fingers.

"Just sleeping, Troy." Gabriella says tiredly, "Its your bed, you sleep here too."

"Fine." He muttered, but he wasn't all too mad.

"Just lose the jeans too," she says, scooting over to give him room.

"Bossy," he scoffs, sliding in next to her in his boxers. Sighing as he felt her reflexively move closer to him, Troy realized how tired he really was.

"And i love you, too." Gabriella whispers, and Troy swears he heard it, but the grogginess he was drifting in and out of fogged his memory.


Well this took a while for me to get up, but here it is.

So please review, and i'll try to get the next chapter up quickly. Thanks. :D

-Mare.