First of all, I was actually trying to get him to say is "I will end you," Jenn-Jenn. Please give me the right translation as always. Thanks again for helping!
And then there's a reviewer called Calibrates who has indeed surprised me with her/his/their review. I got to admit, I did get offended. But thanks for standing up and rant to me to make sure that this fanfiction doesn't go bad. Critique is important.
But give me a warning in the beginning please…
Well! Time for John!
Con VI
Getting Used To
Holy shit! John somehow escaped!
He did not know how but boy is he glad!
John had immediately skipped breakfast, standing near a guard and watching at the group. Dave just walked out of the bathroom just a few minutes after John escaped there and went back to his group. As much as John was hungry for breakfast, he couldn't handle Dave…
But…
How the hell did John escaped? Sure, he didn't get hurt and should be relieved about it but… that's the thing! John didn't do any struggle that would explain how Dave released him… or how the door somehow got unlocked…
Did… Dave did that on purpose…? And why?
"Hey athhole, what the fuck are you doing?" Okay! John turns his head to see a guard. He has weird spiky hair, is tall and lanky, and has 3D shades. "Thouldn't you be with the otherth? The food thuckth but thith ith all you are going to get till lunch."
"Um… I just don't have the stomach, that's all." John said. He's a bit uncomfortable with the guard but hey, at least he isn't a convict. "I mean, I feel like people are just going through the trash and voila! Here's your meal!"
The guard snorts. "The guardth aren't getting anything different. We have to eat whatever the group ith making thince the both ith a thadithtic athhole."
John can't help but giggle. The lisp in this guard is really strong! John knows he's not supposed at others' "disability" but it's just funny! It made him successfully ignore the still overwhelming feeling of being in prison.
"I guess we're suffering all alike, huh…"
And now there's that uncomfortable silence again…
Usually John would be all open and smiles but seriously, there are scary guys that could be axe murderers for all he knows!
"Tho," Oh thank God, the guard is speaking! "I thaw you with that thellmate of yourth and I can't help but thee you being really uncomfortable as thit."
Oh, it looks like John was pretty obvious and it's on his first day too… Man, that seems really pussy of him to do but hey, he has a good reason! John may not be the most kind or generous person there is but he wouldn't kill his father! And well, of course he's going to be overwhelmed by this!
He's even sharing a cell with a fucking assassin!
"Yeah… I-I don't think I can get used to this…"
The guard looks at John and raises an eyebrow. "You killed your own father and you don't think you're going to get uthed to prithon or be relieved that you have a good thellmate?"
Now John looks at the guard. "Dave's a good cellmate?"
"Look, I've been in thith dump for thome time and I've have theen crazy thit going on in here with thellmateth. You're one of the lucky few that don't have to take that kind of bullthit and one that actually have an athhole who careth about you."
John blinks. He almost can't believe what he's hearing from a guard!
Dave cares about him?!
John then looks where Dave is. Sure, John doesn't see Dave's face and can only see the back of his head but… he doesn't look angry.
Is Dave… a good cellmate…?
Okay, maybe John looks –or rather, "examines" the cellmate of his.
Of course, John had to man up about it before he could even begin but there's no way he is pussying out anymore! Dad always did say to be open for everything even though he never was open about John being homosexual…
And John doesn't it for a few days.
And easily, Dave is saner than Jake.
Yeah, that shouldn't be something good but Jake has been… frequent around with John, always somehow being there with him. Jake seems to like his hair a lot as he keeps petting it. It seems Jake has something with self-harming himself, especially on his fingers. Jake chewed them as if it was some constant habit that the therapist wasn't so surprised of.
On the second day John's in prison. he's with suspiciously a new therapist...
Dave doesn't chew his fingers and doesn't seem to go to therapy at all. The constant habit that he seems to have is really, to have a pebble inside the weird shoe-boot thing that all the prisoners have. He usually takes the pebble of his and throws it against a wall like it's his usual leisure time. There's no finger-crunching at all.
And he raps. While John can't exactly look from the bottom bunk without looking suspicions, he could hear what Dave is speaking or rather rap about. And boy, those raps are shitty!
John tried his best to hide his snickers as Dave raps since he still is scared of Dave and –Oh my God! They're so shitty!
John really is lucky that he didn't burst out laughing.
And really, the leisure pebble-throwing time and the really shitty rapping make the assassin known as Dave to be less scary and more… human. Dave is still an assassin, AKA a murderer, but he's still human and not that complete psychopath in TV. The one thing that Dave has something very similar to those assassins is being good-looking…
And it seems that Dave feels guilty about trying to break his arm, too!
Dave keeps his space around John unlike the first day where he seems to like to put his arm around his shoulder a lot. Dave keeps a couple of feet or more between them and doesn't seem to try at all to go into his personal bubble or space and rather does the opposite. Dave is quite generous too as he keeps getting his tray for all of the meal times, guard outside the bathroom when John needed to go, and he even lets John play with his pebble when he picks it up and throws it up like catching a ball until John actually sucked it up and gave it back to Dave.
And damn, Dave even gave his top bunk when John had enough guts to ask!
From what he learned from the movies, bunks are an important part to the prison life!
"By dickens, Johnny boy… are you alright…?" Jake then chuckles. "Do you want me to mash this inoperable melon of his…?"
John blinks out of his thinking mode and then sees Jake's still scary handiwork with the latest therapist. But…
"Um… that's a girl…"
Jake chuckles again. "Oh…? You must have not learned the vital lesson in this big house of ours… All therapists are complete scoundrels…! All males!"
John raises an eyebrow, trying to completely ignore the blood on the therapist's face that isn't her lipstick and be curious about why Jake would think all therapists are males.
"What do you mean, Jake? H-How can all therapists be males?"
Jake then giggles and finally releases the unconscious therapist to the ground.
"It's quite simple, Jade… All females are pure camaraderie of taintless wonder while males…" Jake licks his lips, actually cleaning some near blood off. "Males… all are scoundrels… Yes… even I-I too…"
And for the first time, John witnesses Jake… sobbing…
"Yes… I'm a scoundrel… the worst scoundrel… for sh-she…" Jake chokes out a sob… "The worst… the worst there is…"
Before John could say anything, Jake hugs him.
Oh god, oh god, there's blood on him!
There's blood! There's blood on John now!
His dad… all covered…
John pushes Jake away, not caring if Jake is a psycho. John tries to breath, feeling as if blood…blood it filling his lungs!
So much blood!
Why did there had to be so much… so much…
"…John…? Are you–"
"I-I need to go!"
"Oh…? You need to go potty…? Why didn't you say–"
But John doesn't wait and listen as he actually dashes away, away from all the blood and blood itself…
John takes a deep breath in.
He was lucky enough to find a bathroom with no help and is able to scrub and wash the blood off of him. His arms and face are a bit pink and warm while his palms sting a little. But John scrubbed and washed just about enough to get all the… blood off of him…
And now all alone in this bathroom…John had time to think.
Why is John so scared of Dave…? His brother Dirk is way more intimidating… Jake is a complete psycho…
While Dave…
John sighs.
John definitely judged Dave way too soon and that was an asshole move…
There is seriously nothing that Dave is doing that makes him scary and what happened on the first day just made him uncomfortable. Maybe it's because of his inability to handle being really overwhelmed of him actually being in… here that if a cute rabbit was his cellmate, John would embarrassingly be scared shitless of it.
And Dave is a really attractive and good-looking guy…
John sighs again.
If only he wasn't an assassin and murderer…
But really, Dad had told him that there are kind people with a bad background so they (him and Dad and others) shouldn't be so prejudiced about it. Vriska was a nice friend and "beard" even though her biological mother is a real pirate. She had a seven-pupil eye and a robotic arm and an obsession with spiders and the number eight yet she is the greatest friend that John has ever had.
She even gave him gay porn and a rather big vibrator after he came out to her accidently. She teased him about finding a "nice" bad boy for him as he was such a "goody two-shoes"… and that his type might "very" similar to bad boys…
So yeah, Dad is right about not being prejudiced though Dad was hypocritical about gays…
Dave may be a murderer but he's been so nice and friendly with John that he shouldn't be scared of Dave just because he got way too overwhelmed about being in prison…
From the way Dave is acting towards him... Dave just wants to be friends with him!
John sighs and giggles a little.
Of course! It was so obvious! Dave wants to be friends with him! He had been so friendly with him and never really did push and bully John around. In a way, that makes Dave a dork!
He should definitely apologize to Dave…
The weird bell echoes with rings and beeps before the speaker came.
"HEY FUCKASSES! LOSERS FROM STUPID THERAPY ARE OUT!"
John seriously doesn't know who does announcement but boy… he curses a lot… From the movies, the speaker always did it professionally…
But it's perfect timing!
Okay! No more overwhelming!
Time to apologize to Dave and hopefully have enough time to maybe do a game with him! Perhaps they can play something with pebbles! Maybe even –Oof!
"Well, well, well! Look at here, men! It's the Striders' and English's bitch!" Oh no… Who are these people?
"Ha! Look at what a pussy he is!"
Okay! These are the people John should panic about! John tries to get up and run away. But there's someone behind him. Fuck! The dude is hard like a boulder!
"Well you look at fucking that, the pussy actually tries to escape from us!"
Uh oh…
In a second later, John feels his breath taken out as the guy that had blocked him now pushes him. But John didn't hit the ground again. Another guy pushed him. And another and another and another! He could feel and hear the horrible laughter from them. In the end, John felt the cold, hard, and painful concrete on his face after the last harsh push.
"Fuck, the boy is easy!"
"Yeah, fucking easy!"
"The bitch can't even save himself!"
John can't help but sniff a little. This is even worse than Dave's attempt to break his wrist in the bathroom. The overwhelmness is coming back and kicking.
"Damn, this bitch's ass is fuck!"
"Yeah, at least the demon bastard got some good choice."
…What…?
"Hey, careful dude. He's a pro assassin. He'll kill ya."
"So fucking what? Satan's spawn ain't gonna know what's gonna hit him and those fuck-ugly red eyes of his."
Is actually talking shit about John's cellmate?
"Oh look, bitchy boy is up. What are ya gonna do, bitchy boy? Go crying over fucking freak's co–"
Bam!
John blinks as he sees the guy talking shit about Dave fall down on his back with a really sever bloody nose.
…Whoops…
"Fuck! The bitch took him the fuck out!"
"Hey! Wake the hell up, man! You can't be fucked up by this bitch!"
But before John could attempt to escape again, something hits him behind. One of the guys in the circle must have punched him on the back of his head. John did not go unconscious but he definitely felt the impact and pain of it.
Another guy grabbed the collar of John's outfit with a fist looking ready to punch his face.
"That's it, bitch! Now you're gettin' it!"
John squeaks, squeezing his eyes shut to ready himself for the hit.
But he didn't feel it. He rather hears something. He opens his eyes to see the guy that was ready… got punched by Jake.
"You… You…" Jake growls and looking the angriest that John ever saw. His teeth are bare, his mouth is in a deep frown, and his eyes… "You rank-sleazy… boil-brained… fly-bitten bastards!"
John blinks once and Jake tackles the offender to the ground, repeatedly beating him. But the relief is short-lasted as a convict shows up right in front of him and– is now kicked away from John and is now unconscious…
What the–
"Hey, you alright?" John blinks again and turns his head to see… Dave…
"U-Um… y-yeah…" John inwardly kicks himself. Why the fuck did he stutter?! Jake is beating the shit out of a guy and Dave is just… staring at him…
As if Dave realizes John is finally staring back, he actually looks away. Why is Dave looking away…? Oh yeah, he must felt guilty about the whole wrist-breaking attempt thing.
John then looks down to see… the people who surrounded him all "asleep" and have pained looks. Dirk is actually here and is fighting and winning a fight with three guys while Dave and John just stand there…
"Hey Dave…" John begins, taking a deep breath in and out. "I'm sorry."
Immediately, Dave looks at him with wide eyes. Dave looks pretty much shocked and surprised on what John just said.
"Entschuldigen Sie mich? I mean, excuse me? Egbert, I should be apologizing, not you. I mean, fuck, it's like a kid taking one shitty cookie and the bitchy father bitch-slaps the child where the bitch father should calm his tits down and apologize rather than the kid offering himself as some weird ass human sacrifice for weird ass smuppets."
John can't help but actually giggle in the end. He seriously doesn't know what Dave is trying to do with that bizarre metaphor but Man! Did it lighten the mood! John begins to full-out laughing!
"Oh my God! Haha! Did you seriously –Haha!"
"Hey, as cute as the laugh may be, don't be dissing the Strider metaphor." But John could see that his cellmate is actually blushing.
John settles down his laughter and giggles to look at the flustered Dave. Well, he's not exactly flustered but he is blushing! Yup, Dave isn't scary at all…
"But really Dave, I'm sorry and all you did is just act natural that's all." It's a weird reaction but then again, John hates cake. "Sure, breaking anyone's wrist shouldn't be exactly forgiving but hey, I forgive you with that dorky rambling of yours."
"Breaking wrist…?" Then Dave has a straight face on. "And what are you calling "dorky rambling"? That was a divine sermon of one striking Strider assassin, Egbert."
John then laughs.
"I was overwhelmed." John begins. "I was overwhelmed by the whole… prison life, I guess, that I took it out on you. I mean, yeah, you're a bit intimidating but all you really wanted was a friend!" John didn't see the raising of one eyebrow of the bemused cellmate. "So… I guess I want us to be pals too! Sorry again for calling you scary!"
Dave then smirks and crosses his arms. "No problem, bro. Sorry for having a Stange up my ass just because you called me scary. I shouldn't be an arschloch because a Füchsin like you called me "scary". That was completely uncool in my part."
John can't help but feel relieved as he hugs Dave. He is glad that he doesn't have an angry assassin as his cellmate. And said assassin isn't so bad really. I mean, Dave is even hugging back and –Eep!
Is Dave actually groping his ass?!
"Don't worry Liebling, I'll protect you for now on~." Dave coos. His warm breath is really close to John's now sensitive ear… "Just go back to your cell and stay there. I'll finish this and be right back for you~."
Dave then releases John after giving a final squeeze on John's butt. John is pretty sure his face is fully red right now… And then Dave winks at him before he leaves!
It seems John's legs somehow turned jelly during that interaction as he goes back to his cell… Dave's warm breath still tingling his ear…
Yup, still a lot to get used to…
Next is Dirk.
I actually have a headcannon that Jake has misandry, AKA hatred towards men while he worships women, especially in this fanfiction. But Jake does have exceptions.
So Calibrates, thanks for putting passion and emotion in your review but may you (and the rest of the readers) put at least a warning in the beginning that it's going to be offensive. It's like an offensive joke, people will take offense and it's better if they are warned and yeah, hopefully you understand.
And to Jenn-Jenn, yes! You did it! And no universe that we know of is dead! :D
All in all, thank you for reading! And please review!
