Chapter 7 - Reparation
Hello everyone. Thank you to everyone for continuing to read this story and review. I own none of the traditional characters of the Musketeers.
Athos did not sleep well that night. Since he had given Milady a second chance by banishing her from Paris, sleep had come a lot easier. He was still the man who had turned a countess into a murderess but he was no longer the murderer of the woman he loved. After that day Athos had often wondered whether or not he still loved his wife and whether that part of him had been responsible for his mercy. But every time he had asked himself the question he always found himself unable to answer it. He could write her out of neither his past nor his present, since without her actions he would not have become the musketeer he was. Yet completely letting go was proving surprisingly hard. Many times he wished that it could be as easy as discarding the locket that had hung like a noose around his own neck for so long. That night though it was another woman, not Milady that kept Athos' mind from finding peaceful slumber. He had been given a duty to do. He had done it. Why couldn't that be enough?
The temptation to turn to the bottles of wine hidden at the back wall under the bed was becoming ever more appealing as Athos tossed and turned. Everytime Athos shut his eyes the vision of those disappointed and sad eyes flashed into view. There was something about Athos' reaction to Catherine that terrified and intrigued him at the same time. Athos had sworn off romance and women after his marriage collapsed and while that resolve had been well and truly tested by Ninon de Larroque Athos had pretty much remained true to it. Until now that was. Since Catherine had departed to attend to the Queen, Athos had been unable to get her out of his head. His brooding manner had definitely returned over dinner that night, something d'Artagnan, Aramis and Porthos picked up on. Aramis had a pretty good inclination as to why but Porthos and d'Artagnan looked on worriedly. While Aramis managed to persuade Porthos to let it go d'Artagnan had gone so far as to try and follow Athos home. His attempt lasted all of two streets until Athos, all too aware of what the boy was trying to do, had blatantly told him to leave him be. Athos was fairly certain that d'Artagnan as usual had ignored his request but since he did not feel or hear the musketeer for the rest of the journey he let it be.
The bells of Notre Dame rang out for five o' clock in the morning. Athos moaned and sat up on the edge of his bed. What did he have to do to get rid of this dead weight in his stomach and mind? From sheer tiredness he closed his eyes and listened to his conscience. He only got one word in reply. 'Apologise.'
Opening his eyes again Athos resolved he would get no rest until he made some form of reparation for his actions, not that he technically needed to anyway. Five o' clock meant that the Queen's ladies would soon be up getting everything ready for the Queen. Athos dressed and armed himself before setting off in the direction of the palace. Perhaps he could sort this out before his was due on duty. The walk in the dark was made more pleasant by the quietness around Paris. Give it another hour and that would all change, but for now the peace and clean air allowed Athos to sharpen his mind.
Athos chose a quiet back entrance to get into the palace. The royal guards rarely questioned a musketeer entering the palace but Athos particularly wanted to avoid the attention of the Red guards on the early morning patrol.
As Athos strode down the corridors a door opened on his left and Constance emerged.
'Athos?' She asked giving him a startled stare.
'Madame Bonacieux,' Athos tipped his hat.
'A little early to be at the palace isn't it?' Constance asked collecting herself together again.
'I was looking for someone.'
Constance's eyebrows raised. 'She's not likely to be up yet she doesn't start until later.'
Athos marvelled at the woman before him. He had always respected Constance. Unlike many women he had met Constance had a remarkably sharp eye and not least the ability to ground d'Artagnan's hot headedness. On many levels she and d'Artagnan made a good match for each other. The depth of Constance's foresight was enough to startle even Athos sometimes and now was one of those moments.
'Don't look at me like that.' Constance said to him. 'Why else would you drag yourself here at this time in the morning?'
'She told you then.'
'Of course. What were you thinking? If you ask me you deserve to have been kept up all night.' Constance muttered flattening the front of her dress.
'I had a job to do.' Athos responded.
'Well if you ask me accusing someone you just met of being a traitor and spy was a stupid way to go about it, even by musketeer standards.' Constance said.
Athos grimaced. 'I did not call her a traitor.'
'You might as well have.'
'When is she likely to be up?' Athos asked quietly.
'She is up now and she has a name!' Constance and Athos' gaze turned towards the source of the cold voice at the end of the corridor and found Catherine standing with her arms characteristically folded across her chest eyeing them disapprovingly.
'I thought the Queen said you were to get some rest.' Constance replied.
'Marie is still ill and Annabelle's leave begins today.' Catherine replied. 'You can't do the breakfast, dress and linens on your own.'
'You should be in bed.' Constance chided. 'You look as if you've slept as much as he has.'
That part was true anyway.
'I'll manage and like I said you can't do everything on your own.' Catherine turned her gaze towards Athos had remained staring at her.
'A little early for musketeer duties isn't it.' She noted after a moment.
'I'm not here on official business.' Athos replied.
'Then why are you here? Does Captain Treville suspect me in some new plot?' While sarcasm did not suit Catherine well frankly she felt it was too early in the morning to care. Both Constance and Athos picked up on the hurt that resounded in the background and Catherine took some satisfaction from seeing Athos' gaze drop to ground.
'I came to apologise.' Athos said slowly.
Constance and Catherine shared a glance after which Constance departed down the corridor.
'Since when did duty require an apology?' Catherine said at length.
'Since duty caused me to offend you.'
Catherine sighed and walked down the corridor stopping a few steps before Athos. She stared at him for a moment longer and sighed again.
'Your apology is accepted sir. You can go now.' The words were spoken blankly.
Athos and Catherine's gazes locked on each other.
'I really am sorry,' Athos murmured softly.
'And I told you your apology is accepted.' Catherine said firmly.
'And yet it appears I am not yet forgiven.'
'When you do something worth forgiveness I will give it to you.' Catherine replied without quite comprehending what she had just said.
'What exactly would that entail?' Athos asked. He fully understood the implications of what had just been said but, guessing that the girl in front of him did not, decided to play along.
'If you want my forgiveness you'll have to earn back my trust.' Catherine said after a brief pause.
'I was not aware I had broken that in the first place.' Athos said evenly.
'I trusted you as a man of honour, a man who wanted to accompany and talk to me for that reason alone, a man who was at least open minded enough to give someone a chance. Instead you decided to entrap and insult me purely to get what you wanted. If you want my forgiveness then restore my trust in that first opinion and you shall have it.' The words were evenly spoken but even as they left her mouth Catherine felt a feeling of foreboding settle over her.
Athos stared at the woman in front of him with a mild and thoughtful expression on his face.
'So you want me to prove my honour to you?'
'I want you to demonstrate to me why I should ever trust you again. If you can do that I'll forgive you.'
Athos sighed at the enormity of what she wanted. For a moment a flicker of anger, at the infringement of his honour, crossed his mind but he quickly steadied himself. If that was what she wanted then for the sake of his own peace of mind he would need to find a way to give it to her. But how? Athos pondered a moment. Catherine valued equality between men and women that was obvious, she also seemed to value integrity and the idea of trust. She had been made to reveal and entrust the secrets of her past to him perhaps the remedy was to do the same in return. Equality between the pair of them. There was just one very big problem. Athos was not yet prepared to give up his painful past to a woman he had just met. His indecision must have shown on his face because Catherine sighed and turned away.
'You have apologised and it has been accepted,' she said. 'For now at least it seems we will both have to make do with that.'
'What you want I cannot so easily give.' Athos said softly.
'Then as I said we shall make do for now.'
'So we are indifferent acquaintances then?' Athos said.
'We are acquaintances.' Catherine corrected Athos without looking at him. 'I won't stop distrusting you until you prove that I can.'
'I…' Athos was interrupted by the sound of crashing porcelain and cursing.
'I told her she couldn't do it all alone.' Catherine cried in frustration. 'You should go Monsieur, you'll be late for duty.' With that statement Catherine hurried away.
'Athos,' He called after her. 'My name is Athos.'
'Catherine!' She shouted back already out of sight.
Athos shook his head and started back down the corridor. Out of the corner of his eye he thought he saw a shadow move from behind a low hanging window tapestry and stopped. But nothing materialised and deciding that his tiredness was to blame Athos left the way he came. As the resonation of his boots on the polished floors faded away the tapestry moved again and the Comte de Rochefort stepped out from behind.
