The Great Hall is practically buzzing from the newest front page article of the Daily Prophet that, for the first time in months, wasn't about the famous Boy-Who-Lived and the possibly senile old headmaster of Hogwarts.

"What's going on?" Harry asks, seemingly to himself since everyone was gossiping and crowding around the nearest copies of the paper.

"It's Rita Skeeter's newest article about the visitors." Hermione explains. "From what I can tell, she encountered a few of them yesterday and wrote about them. She probably over dramatized it, as usual." She adds with an annoyed scoff as she hands the boy the paper.

Harry scans the paper and is immediately taken aback. This type of news is worth the front page? He expects this from a two page article in one of his Aunt Petunia's magazines, not on a public newspaper. Maybe news is slow this week?

"Oi! What's that?" a rough voice from behind Harry asks.

He flinches violently and turns around, startled, and sees InuYasha and the wolf guy, Kouga, he thinks. They're both staring at the paper in confusion at the moving portrait of most of their temporary alliance, sans Sesshomaru, on the paper surrounded by words. What's so important on the paper that everyone's so focused on it?

The whole hall quiets, not sure how two demons (well, a demon and a half) will react to the article. It could be either disastrous or loud. Or both.

"U-Um… here," Harry offers the paper to Kouga, only to be refused.

"Read it out loud. We don't know how to read," he says simply.

This earns a few snickers here and there. Who doesn't know how to read? Apparently people from the Feudal Era where real education isn't common.

"O-Okay." Harry swallows nervously, hoping the expectant demons won't be angry at him for reading them the news. What's the phrase again? 'Don't kill the messenger'? He hopes they won't, as he starts to read outloud, avoiding eye contact with them.

The Feudal Fighters: Honorable Heroes or Hapless Harem?

By: Rita Skeeter

After a mysterious group, consisting of two demons, a half-demon, a mercenary, and a young priestess, arrive with an unexpected entrance in the Great Hall of the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, many waited in bated breath to figure the motives of such an unprecedented group.

According to sources, the group came from Japan's Feudal Era, a startling 500 years in the past, to follow up on the false rumors of Voldemort's return and his possible alliance with their enemy, a formidable demon by the name of Naraku. But is this seemingly heroic alliance all that it seems? Or is this pack of misfits after a more romantic prize?

After a clear inspection, it seems the young priestess known as Kagome Higurashi, while the only one of the group to have present day origins, and is the sole female in the group of strapping young men. Just the day prior to this paper's publication, she was seen in the company of the team's mercenary, otherwise known to most as Bankotsu.

They obviously seemed well acquainted, and to any onlooker, they would seem like a picture perfect couple. With the way the gazed at each other fondly and spoke with a lover's gentleness, love was definitely seen between the two. However, it seems that all isn't as happy as it seems. In the midst of their moment of uninterrupted intimacy, not one, but two other members of their group interrupt in a barrage of jealous passion.

In an instant, the couple were separated by the half-demon known as InuYasha, and the wolf demon by the name of Kouga, and an intense argument over the lone female filled the empty halls of Hogwarts. It seems that the pure priestess, isn't as pure as she seems.

The raging jealousy soon became too much for Kagome, and she takes off in a flurry of fear and sadness at the sight of her quarreling lovers. While clearly unknown, it is speculated that she ran for the comfort of the only demon who wasn't present at the time, the Feudal Demon Lord, Sesshomaru.

"I always thought it was odd how she chose to travel with a group of males in nothing but a school girl's uniform," A student named Draco Malfoy, son of Luscious Malfoy, commented. "But I guess she wore it for a convenience that's far from travelling purposes."

"The Halfie also cares a lot for the girl," the infamous poltergeist, Peeves, also comments. "Why, he even forced Potter and his friends to help him provide food for her. She definitely has them all wrapped around her dainty little pinky. Or in the Halfie's case, on a leash."

This brings a whole new light upon the mysterious time travelers. Can they really be trusted to 'save' the world when the female can barely choose which suitor she'll end up with? That is, if she's truly interested in a committed relationship? Stay tuned for the next article!

As Harry finishes, a chilling and static energy fills the hall, like it was electrifying the very air. Everyone turns to the Great Hall's entrance and sees the main topic of the front page, Kagome Higurashi, looking absolutely livid with pink static like energy crackling around her as a crumbled copy of the Daily Prophet rests lifelessly in her hand, singed at the corners. Who knew pink could look so deadly.

"What. Is. THIS?!" she says in a very deadly tone, making everyone flinch in fear.

InuYasha and Kouga flinch away from the sizzling effects of the girl's purification energy, while a certain Slytherin cretin ignores the danger.

"It's your fault for being a harlot," Malfoy retorts out loud, only to cower at the glare sent his way from the enraged priestess. He could've sworn something burnt him.

She storms up to the teachers' table and wave the burnt article around. "What is this blasphemy?! I'm not some whore, you know! What's wrong with the way I dress?"

"Well, it's not very fit for travel." InuYasha admits.

"SIT!"

He faceplants violently on the ground. He'll admit, he had that one coming. He really should have left that comment in his head.

"What the hell's going on?" Bankotsu asks as he enters the hall, followed by Sesshomaru.

The mercenary was just shoved down a flight of stairs by Kagome, who seemed to not even realize she did so. He hasn't even done anything yet!

"I would also like to know the issue." Sesshomaru comments. Someone has to answer for why things are so chaotic. Well, more so than usual.

The two approach the near rampant young woman, both wary of her still crackling powers. Both have been singed before and wish not to re-experience.

"The issue is that that woman from yesterday degraded me as some sort of whore all over the front page of the newspaper!" Kagome yells back at the duo just entering.

"Are they wrong?" Ron asks, quite stupidly.

No one should let him talk first thing in the morning, if the way Bankotsu holding back Kagome is anything to go by. He barely blinks as his arm is holding her by her waist as she tries to reach for the redhead, muttering incoherently.

Sesshomaru quickly reads a discarded paper and scoffs. "As if such slander could be factual information. Not even a fool would believe that woman is capable of gaining all of our attention."

"Yeah! Wait – HEY!" Kagome pauses at what sounded like an insult from the lord's mouth. Was he insulting her or defending her?

Dumbledore rises to his pedestal and clears his throat, gathering all attention to him. "Miss Higurashi, I apologize for the harsh criticism you've received, and I'll see to it that the publisher apologizes. Until then, everyone has classes to attend to. Dismissed."

Slowly, the Great Hall empties as the food disappears. As everyone leaves, Harry Potter realizes he officially HATES Mondays. And newspapers. But also Mondays.

"Blimey. What was that magic that girl was using?" Ron asks, glad he escaped a near death experience.

"I don't know, but I know one way to find out!" Hermione declares, causing both her friends to sigh at her expectant answer.

"The library." They answer glumly.

"What's so bad about the library?" Hermione asks.

The boys groan in unison.


Okay. Be honest. Is it obvious that I had too much fun writing this? Because I was literally giggling the whole time I wrote that article. Or was it because I drank Red Bull and Monster back to back? I hope this sounded very Skeeter-like, because I can't remember and I was too lazy to look up her past articles.

Anyway! here's the voting thingies so far for pairings:

InuYasha/Hermione: II (2)

InuYasha/Luna: II (2)

Kouga/Hermione: II (2)

Kouga/Luna: I (1)